While Steezus works on making his description viable, I figured I’d drop some descriptions on a sneak peek I got of the future skis he’s droppin (below quote)
STEEZUS_CHRI5TYea there was a full description and other details to the right side that ultimately got cut out. Was just getting too dark lol
Ski:
C.E.O/D (douche) @STEEZUS_CHRIST says their highly anticipated upcoming models show a sharp divide in new vs old wave thinking. The “Stunt with Stalins,” which is actually TWalls next pro model, and “Be a Diva like Nikitas” will have a full metal jacket liberal tear lubed and balsa wood core, respectively. Steezus said the diff cores will ideally represent the backwards progress society has made, as the world will realize that Nikitas flexy balsaesque democracy isn’t good for much other than soft or broken sticks and global dairy trade agreements (eg. butter). Names were not dropped specifically, but if I had to guess it would be the “Gulagisch Pro” and “Cuban Missle Crisis”. Missle crisis is aimed at Vishnu die hard swerve skiers who want something even softer. TWall gulagisch model goes up on initial display in Berlin next Nov.
Drop info:
Steezus is not sure when they’ll actually drop — all i was told is that “the Stunt with Stalins will force a unified ideal, impact far more than just the ski industry, and make the whole mountain your playground.” Unclear what all that means other than just being a great ski, but what a fantastic general mission statement. It is great to see brands going above and beyond to touch other peoples lives.
He said the Nikita’s are for people who hang out on park landings expecting not to get got like @BrotherB.
Description:
Stunt w Stalin’s proprietary full auto spray big dick energy layup increases firing rate at ur favorite local hills Jerrys (gang). Spraying friends was not mentioned, but I assume it was either because @BrotherB (the factory’s eavesdropping agro water boy) has none and gets his feelings hurt easily and/or because it just has gay connotations that Mr. Christ refuses to associate with (spraying Jerrys is obv straight asf tho)
basically I’m sold
Future concept models/catchphrase:
- Tail Tap Gongs with Zedong
- VTOL with Vlad
- acquire cystic Fibrosis with water fast psychosis - Ankilla Kollab (Go gorilla with a killa/atilla also potential katch phrase)
**This post was edited on Dec 10th 2022 at 10:40:22pm
**This post was edited on Dec 10th 2022 at 10:41:00pm