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Got a package stolen by some loser on a bicycle. Fortunately he's stupid enough to live in my neighbourhood. Genuinely looking for ideas for a bit of payback. I've had my car keyed and packages stolen before, and I feel I've reached a bit of a boiling point. I'd like something that wouldn't result in major charges after being caught, or that I could at least pay my way out of within the range of 300. I want it to be damaging
shit in a bag and put it on his steps. second idea, place rotting fish under his car so it leaches in from below and it never gets out. third, get a blank sign and put it in the front yard write "this cunt steals packages"
See if he has backed up taxes. pay his taxes and then if he doesn't pay you you own his house and kick his ass out. the revenge would be so diabolical.
weatcoastWhy not just get his dumb ass charged with theft if you know who it is?
Its just under 100 and nothings ever come of fedex "investigating"
I'm just completely fed up and just want to upset something he really values. I'm not at a point where I have anyone I'm living with I'd be worried about retaliation, I'm looking to move out of my flat soon, and want to take this chance to meet him im being a greater asshole
u pay some high school kid to get another high school kid to get another kid etc to do whatever you want and by that point its gone through so many hands that its hard to trace back to u
i would pay them to shoot his dick off and make him eat it!!!!!
and then ransack his house for ur package
Plant bamboo somewhere in their yard. It’s a super invasive plant that spreads so fast next thing they know they have 90 bamboo saplings shooting up all spreading their own bamboo and they won’t be able to win the battle
Porch pirates are why it pisses me off how it's done in the USA... Just keep it at the warehouse and either offer a redelivery the next day, or allow someone to just go to the warehouse and pick it up on their own time...
Dont just leave it on my porch so any old jerkbag can steal it, or force me to get some stupid porch camera in order to hopefully prevent it...
Take the valve cores out of the valve stems from his tires (preferable both bike and car) then when he goes to fill them up, the air shoots right back out.
You’d still get the interest on it even if he does pay it back so you still win
PsychicMigrationSee if he has backed up taxes. pay his taxes and then if he doesn't pay you you own his house and kick his ass out. the revenge would be so diabolical.
PacificRimJobPorch pirates are why it pisses me off how it's done in the USA... Just keep it at the warehouse and either offer a redelivery the next day, or allow someone to just go to the warehouse and pick it up on their own time...
Dont just leave it on my porch so any old jerkbag can steal it, or force me to get some stupid porch camera in order to hopefully prevent it...
Fedex just left it in the middle of the porch and the dumb camera only picked up the back of a head
it all just kills me
skierman
"Oh you have packages stolen and your car keyed for no reason?
Yeah, that sounds like a lot of bullshit to me. Something tells me a lot of people in your neighborhood hate you and probably for good reasons."
This would be amazing. Or one of those glitter stink bomb traps. Otherwise anything that causes harm could get you in trouble. Or just fill a box full of old cat shit and leave it for a pirate to steal.
This is one of the greatest thing’s i’ve read on this site. Got my freedom boner ringing
PsychicMigrationSee if he has backed up taxes. pay his taxes and then if he doesn't pay you you own his house and kick his ass out. the revenge would be so diabolical.
My wife bought a super expensive vibrator, dudnt get delivered til we were on a long vacation. She didnt wanna ask our super christian neighbors to hold package, so chanced it and its gone by time we got home. Now im paranoid that porch pirate is gonna keep coming back after that haul
theLiquorThis is one of the greatest thing’s i’ve read on this site. Got my freedom boner ringing
My wife bought a super expensive vibrator, dudnt get delivered til we were on a long vacation. She didnt wanna ask our super christian neighbors to hold package, so chanced it and its gone by time we got home. Now im paranoid that porch pirate is gonna keep coming back after that haul
why would u admit that to a bunch of horny teenagers
