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December, 2024

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Jokes for the lift

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BigNaturalsOnly
Posts: 46 - Karma: 246
The snow sucks this year so far for most of us so let's at least have a good time. Share your best jokes/ice breakers and pick up lines for the lift line, riding the lift, getting a laugh out of the lifty.

What do you get when you cross a bull dog and a rhino? . . . A really scared mailman!
That's a fuckin knee slapper right there buddy.
Jan 19 2021 9:35PM
24 0
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Railslayer69
Posts: 92 - Karma: 824
Me and my friends get like 3-4 snowballs each before we get on the chairlift and then huck them at annoying groups of crackass gappers
Jan 19 2021 9:38PM
17 65
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Bended_Toenail
Posts: 1417 - Karma: 10,220
I'm like the snow report, I promise 10 inches and deliver 2. Best of all, it also works the other way if you're an Alpha Chad.

**This post was edited on Jan 19th 2021 at 9:41:33pm
Jan 19 2021 9:40PM
35 0
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GayWolf420
Posts: 37590 - Karma: 122,375
still trying to find our friend Bill out there
Jan 19 2021 9:41PM
8 0
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Young_patty
Posts: 3290 - Karma: 38,148
“Hey wanna hear a knock knock joke?”

”sure”

“Knock knock”

”who’s there?”


*Jump off of chair*
Jan 20 2021 12:07AM
38 0
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elm.
Posts: 1510 - Karma: 13,593
How do snowboarders say hello?

"Sorry bro!"
Jan 20 2021 1:30AM
42 0
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PimpChimpin
Posts: 1287 - Karma: 12,573
Let’s put the bar down
Jan 20 2021 1:32AM
25 0
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gorbdawggybrent
Posts: 970 - Karma: 8,769
after a lifty gives a little kid a push be like “where’s my push” gets them every time
Jan 20 2021 1:32AM
31 0
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Session
Posts: 5391 - Karma: 22,295
Must be nice to have someone to ride lifts with. Singles life is single rides this year.
Jan 20 2021 2:16AM
26 0
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oldmanski
Posts: 3325 - Karma: 23,969
You know why a bird doesn't pee?

Because it eats with its pecker
Jan 20 2021 8:11AM
17 0
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GrandThings
Posts: 3166 - Karma: 31,948
SessionMust be nice to have someone to ride lifts with. Singles life is single rides this year.


This. It fucking blows. Overall the season has been awesome so far, but I didnt realize how much I'd miss riding the chair with randos
Jan 20 2021 8:48AM
22 0
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WoFlowz
Posts: 7953 - Karma: 64,109
Hey lol
“proceeds to seductively pop his skis off, pulls is pants down and gets snow up his ass”
Jan 20 2021 9:41AM
10 0
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brownetown
Posts: 441 - Karma: 4,329
“Hey did you bring the mattadaddy?”
“What’s the mattadaddy?”
“It’s okay son don’t worry about it”

bonus points if you say it to some teenage girl
Jan 20 2021 9:22PM
15 1
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AGOF
Posts: 2038 - Karma: 3,607
What’s the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?

I wouldn’t let a garbanzo bean on my face.
Jan 20 2021 11:51PM
14 0
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BigPurpleSkiSuit
Posts: 9414 - Karma: 68,995
Things to yell at random people:

Hi Dad!
Hi Grandma!
I love you!
Hi Daddy!

And if you're feeling really courageous and see someone with blonde strands

Peg me Miley Cyrus!
Jan 21 2021 2:13AM
10 0
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mountaindewgirl
Posts: 2289 - Karma: 20,831
Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there are not enough rooms, so they have to share a bed.

In the middle of the night, the guy no the right wakes up and says, ‟I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a hand job!”

The guy on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he is had the same dream, too.

Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, ‟That's funny, I dreamed I was skiing!”
Jan 21 2021 2:28AM
15 0
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tomatonater
Posts: 853 - Karma: 2,774
Yelling “dropping knees and sucking deeez!” at every tele skier you see
Jan 21 2021 7:09AM
15 0
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Thegenericskier
Posts: 2621 - Karma: 29,655
"Turns are a sign of weakness''
Jan 21 2021 11:35AM
7 0
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WoFlowz
Posts: 7953 - Karma: 64,109
Not rly a joke but it’s fun and competitive and sometimes brings some laps but me and the Morningstar lifty sometimes play Rock Paper Scissors shoot while I’m loading the lift
Aug 26 2021 11:01PM
5 0
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BigPurpleSkiSuit
Posts: 9414 - Karma: 68,995
I often yell "Hi Daddy!!!" And "I love you!"at random people who are standing under the lift
Aug 27 2021 1:31PM
2 0
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CrowbarJones
Posts: 31 - Karma: 428
You: “Hey man nice skis!”

Them: “thanks dude!”

You: “Are they both yours???”
Aug 28 2021 1:41PM
6 0
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