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funny stories from on the lift
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ok so i got 2 hot off the press.
i was riding with my friend, so we had to ride up with 2 other complete strangers. we're arout half way up the lift when stranger #1 tells us he's going to be a judge at the 'canibis cup' in amsterdam. he procedes to explain the this is the 'olympics of pot smoking.' next thing i know stranger #2 pulls out a bowl and a crack lighter (no lie, it was like a blow torch. there was at least a inch flame) he cant get it lighted so he presumes to blow through the bowl thus resulting in weed flying out. by this time im laughing my ass off and almost fall off the chair. he packs a new bowl and smokes it off. when we get to the top this stupid mother fucker gets his tips caught on the unloading ramp and falls flat on his face.
keep in mind that both of these guys are no less than 45 (white beards and shit)
then, the second one wasnt too funny but i found it ammusing. i was dicking around in the park throwing really really small 3's. so i go to the bottom and this guy i ride the lift with asks me if i was the one doing 'helicopters.' that almost made me roll on the ground laughing too.
all in all it was a good day.
holy shit!!!111!1! he has more hten one namne??>?? omggg!! what a sux0rz@!! LOL
I heard that Line is putting dust from the moon in their skis to make them not as influenced by the gravity of the earth. Has anyone heard of this new technology?
'quebec is the mexico of canada'-ride_like_fire
'g-dogg is a d-bagg'-DAMICO
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did the dude with the blow torch pass the chron or was he a selfish sam?
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ahaha...helicopers. Yesterday I was sitting next to a snowboarder and I dropped my goggles, but luckily, they got caught on the kid's board...it scared me because they cost like $60.
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'Your father is the one that says fuck all the time, I say shit,'
-my mom
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actually he did try to pass it but i cant smoke. my friend hit it.
holy shit!!!111!1! he has more hten one namne??>?? omggg!! what a sux0rz@!! LOL
I heard that Line is putting dust from the moon in their skis to make them not as influenced by the gravity of the earth. Has anyone heard of this new technology?
'quebec is the mexico of canada'-ride_like_fire
'g-dogg is a d-bagg'-DAMICO
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Karma: 23
that was supposed to say 5 inch flame, the got stuck
holy shit!!!111!1! he has more hten one namne??>?? omggg!! what a sux0rz@!! LOL
I heard that Line is putting dust from the moon in their skis to make them not as influenced by the gravity of the earth. Has anyone heard of this new technology?
'quebec is the mexico of canada'-ride_like_fire
'g-dogg is a d-bagg'-DAMICO
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this one time i was riding up a lift with this one guy , and i farted like 8 times in a row, then he farted like 3 times, it was really weird, we didnt even talk
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I was on the lift with this lady in NOrth Carolina last year, and I told her I was going to go skiing at hood in the summer. She says and an arrogant attitude like she knows everything, 'We'll I don't think there is skiing in the summer.'
Imagine the ns outcry if u(lateralis) were banned. There would be countless threads and petitions to bring u back, it would be like when treadway got banned from whistler. Someone would probably make and sell 'Free Lateralis' stickers and shit. -jflo453
I don't deny there are bad things in the US right now, hell, 51% of the country to be exact. But god damnit, our country being fat is NOT a problem. I do't give a shit how fat people are. hell, fat kids are harder to kidnap, that means our cou
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So me and my friend (friend A) are hiking this jump for a little while and my other friend (friend B) goes down to the bottom cuz hes stupid. so me and friend A go to the bottom and take the chair up to look for friend B. We had to ride up with this retard and he starts talkin about how he normally wears his biking helmet skiing and then he said that hes in the special olympics and skies the pro corse at jackson. And the lift goes over thisbig cliff with jagged rocks at the bottom and everythin so me and friend A are gettin really scared that this retard is goin to go crazy and push us off the chair. we got to the top and ran away.
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“When you sit back and you look out and your on top of a peak you realize that there’s no worries in life and its all about happiness right then�- C.R. Johnson
“For me it’s the kind of fun that I like to have, it’s going skiing in these big mountains and having the opportunities to get into these places we get to go.�- Seth Morrison
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ahaha you should have pushed the retard off the lift
member 9020
newbies are our future unless if we stop them now!
'dont fuck with me cause the last person that fucked with me....well they lived a pretty normal life'- misty7
'maybe i shold turn lesbien and get the girls'-misty7 'i can have sex with the snow'-misty7 on how winter will end his lonelyness
LOGIC HEADWEAR
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i rode a lift with a retard once, it was wierd. he kept makin wierd noises
__________________
put on whatever makes you attractive
if it's not you then do it for the sake of fashion
your friends like a certain you
that's who you've got to be
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Last time I was on a chair lift I met someone who lived in my same apartment complex. Total mind blow.
- - AlpineSurfBum: gonna clean the fish tank again? - -
Stewie: Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but you're a total bitch.
It's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care.
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at snowmass once a 40 or so year old retarded guy got on the lift with me and my two friends david and jack and jack had ridden the lift with this dude likt earlier that day and when he saw him ask to ride with us he was like just keep going and i was like whatever, but somehow he got on the lift and he starts talking and we figure out after a while that hes retarded and he asks if he can take a run with us so we figure no big deal one run wont hurt anything so we take a run with him and get back on the chairlift and he starts talking about how he likes to hit himself on shit and hurt himself and shit and we were like fuck, then he said we probably didnt wanna ski with him anymore and thats what everybody does they just take off and if we do that hes just gonna floor it into a tree, so we ended up skiing with him for like another hour until he had to go home, during the time he skiid with us he told us about all this shit, like how he was gonna have to leave the next day and his skis were crying cause they didnt wanna get put away and he said last year when they left he through shit at his dad in the airport, cause he didnt wanna go, and he was like maybe i should do that again, and were just like, no dont do that
anyways it was really fucked up and pretty scary
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I usually act retarded when going up the lift with someone. It's funny because you can say whatever you want and they really cannot get mad at you. Haha, good times.
----2ond in Command of DANSA-----
To Huck. v. The act of throwing oneself off of a cornice, cliff, rock, or any other thing that results in an attempt to fly.
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
GW Award December 3, 2004
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a couple of years ago i was hanging in my park at pats peak, night skiing, and i ended up on the double lift with this cute blonde girl, whatever. the next summer i was working at my grocery store and one day i see the new chick... and familiar looking blonde. a couple of weeks later i was telling her i was a skier and i work at pats peak. shes like: 'that WAS you!!! I KNEW you looked familiar' so yeah, i ended up working with a girl i met on the lift
-Joe
_______________________________________
Official NS marketing consultant
Help me get a free ipod please!?!?!
http://www.freeiPods.com/?r=9734247
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^ ????? A hot girl at Pats!?!? Since when?
----2ond in Command of DANSA-----
To Huck. v. The act of throwing oneself off of a cornice, cliff, rock, or any other thing that results in an attempt to fly.
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
GW Award December 3, 2004
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most retarded people are really happy because ignorance is blissfull but this guy was really sad and mad it was really depressing
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^^not so much hot as really cute. theres is a diff. she was one of the patrolers girlfriend's. dude ended uop stalking her for the next year and 1/2. apparently the kid is a dick, she wouldnt tell me his name cause i told her i'd kick the shit out of him, and she didnt want the trouble. hahaha
-Joe
_______________________________________
Official NS marketing consultant
Help me get a free ipod please!?!?!
http://www.freeiPods.com/?r=9734247
Posts: 28699
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Damn, there seems to be an upcoming of more stalkers now-a-days.
----2ond in Command of DANSA-----
To Huck. v. The act of throwing oneself off of a cornice, cliff, rock, or any other thing that results in an attempt to fly.
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
GW Award December 3, 2004
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Karma: 18
who else? what am i missing?
-Joe
_______________________________________
Official NS marketing consultant
Help me get a free ipod please!?!?!
http://www.freeiPods.com/?r=9734247
Posts: 28699
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Karma: -5,563
Oh they really don't work at Pats, just a few of my friends are being stalked right now and it's kind of amusing and weird.
----2ond in Command of DANSA-----
To Huck. v. The act of throwing oneself off of a cornice, cliff, rock, or any other thing that results in an attempt to fly.
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
GW Award December 3, 2004
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Karma: 18
oh ok
-Joe
_______________________________________
Official NS marketing consultant
Help me get a free ipod please!?!?!
http://www.freeiPods.com/?r=9734247
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I told an indian (non-american) when she asked me what this was for (flap for season pass) I said that is where you put your I.D. so when you get knocked out they know who you are.
.................at that point I started to cry...mainly 'cause I sat on my balls. I banged this chick so hard one time..she had to adjust her cant.
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I was riding up the lift with this semi hot mom. totaly a dumb blond that shoulnt be alowed to have children...EVER, anywho she goes on blabbering about a party she threw the last night for her friends she made some whiskey jello shots, rum jello shots and just plain jello in some jello shot cups for her kids and there friends.(she said they were about 7 years old). but as it turns out the kids got a hold of the rum shots and went to town. she didn't notice because she was pretty drunk and she only found out about it when one of her daughters freinds puked on the rug. meanwile she is laughing through all of this. and I cant stop laughing at how stupid this chick is. wow what a crazy bitch
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The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that. It's good knowin' he's out there. The Dude. Takin' 'er easy for all us sinners. Shoosh. I sure hope he makes the finals.
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on friday 2 of my friends and i got on a lift and this like 10 year old kid hopped on with us. We st arted going up the mountain and the kid is scared shitless of us for some reason. Well one of my jackass friends speaks up and says 'if you want to ride the lift with us you have to drop a fresh beat or we are going to throw you off.' The kid said he didnt konw how to beat box so the other friend on the lift threw it down and gave him and example. After a few minutes of trying we finnaly got the kid to sputter and spit from his lips it was the funniest shit ever.
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For steezy my neezy keep my arms so breezy
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^ hahaha thats classic
once me and two of my friend were riding the chair, and this other kid is on the very right of the lift, nothing is said during the entire ride, then at the end the kid says 'can we put up the bar now' in the gayest voice ive ever heard in my life, me and my friends start cracking up and the kid looks like hes gonna cry
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P
U
T
S
ladies man cult WHAT
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That was the weirdest thing ever Ike, i remember that
I don't need no arms around me
I don't need no drugs to calm me
I have seen the writing on the wall
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i wanna use that fresh beat line sometime, on random ass people just be like 'drop a beat nig'
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Its fun just starting random conversations with people. =O)
i dont really have a life, but i am lazy. and i got sick of weeding through all you peoples shit cause... basically im smarter than you.
- Crystal-Needs-a-Park
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i wanna try asking people like really personal questions like old people just be like 'whens the last time you boned a bitch?' like pop it in in the middle of a conversation
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i was going up the lift and a fellow NSer recognised me from one of my pics.. wild
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Rocky Racoon
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well this wasnt on the lift but the lift line... so it was a 'powder day' (in new york, so it was like a foot) and i kinda got separated from my friends. but i found them on the back side of the mountain, where the skiings awsome but there is only a two person lift. so i saw them like almost near the lift, and me beeing stupid i yelled into the massive lift line if there were any singles. so then the whole lift line was like YEAH! IN THE BACK! so then this guy came up to me and was like 'oh are u a single ' and i was like yeah, so were about to go, when this fat guy like thows his pole in front of me and the other guy and starts arguing. so long story short, ski patrol had to get involved and the whole lift line (including my friends) was screaming NO CUTTERS and while this whole rucus was going on, i managed to sneak in with this little kid while everyone was still screaming... it was soo funny
Its Morphin Time!
GO GO POWER RANGERS
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I was waiting in the lift line with my brother and two of his friends, and the people ahead of us were loading on, then I notice the lift stopped and my brother and his friends are laughing their asses off. Seven people tried to get on a quad.
Also this boy Eric would be on the chair lift and he would see some random guy and yell
'Frank? Is that you? It is! It's been soon long'
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its always fun to be really quiet with a single and then out of nowhere, act like something is poking you inside your jacket and mumble "ouch. my knife is stabbing me"
or, there's always the pretend fight with a friend, ja know yelling about how she slept with your boyfriend and how you're pregnant, etc. talk about uncomfortable for the random dude sitting next to you
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"this one time i was riding up a lift with this one guy , and i farted like 8 times in a row, then he farted like 3 times, it was really weird, we didnt even talk"
for some reason it wont let me quote but ne way bahahhahahahahahahhahahhahha funniest lift story ive ever heard i lold for real
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Haha this thread sure came out of the grave. Good searchbar use!!!
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k me and my friend always act retarted on the lift and we he always yells ow when they put the bar down and this onetime this old guy put te bar down and he was like ow and the guy said u didnt get hit and my friend was just like yes i did wat r u saying and the guy was like no the bar woulda bounced up so my friends like whos ya daddy? and the guys like dont talk to me like that and then my friend just said wats goin on? in a rlly funny voice
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yeah yesterday 2 guys were playing the penis game, one was on the lift and the other one was on the hill, I joined, it was fun
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i was at kicking horse during new years and they got about 2 feet overnight and it was sunny. so i go up with a guy and another girl (we were all singles) and the guy started to ask us where we were from. when i said Calgary he was like "aarrgg" and told me to go back to calgary half jokingly. the two were from golden and the guy hated people from other places skiing there i guess(stealing freshies). so later on he says he is from edmonton and has lived there for 8 months. some local this guy was! he acted like he lived there all his life or something.
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Today at my park we decided it was dress like a gaper day, so I wore a womans undershirt and then a perferated sleevless tight jersey on top of that. Anyway, I was on the chair, and these 11 year old girls were behind me. They tried to start a conversation, "Arnt you cold?" And I was like no. They wanted to start trouble, I could hear it in there tone. They proceeded. "Why arnt you wearing a coat?" "Its gaper day." "Your gay?" "no." "GIGGLE GIGGLE" So when I got to the top of the lift, I was like, hell no I aint gonna be putting up with this shit. And when they got to the top of the lift, I was like, "If you ever start shit with me again, there will be dire consequences. You best understand." And they took off like bats out of hell.
Another time I was with a friend and we didnt have our bar down, and this guy from behind started hassling us about it, so I told him I couldnt put the bar down because I had abskalapslapski, a rare disease, and he didnt believe me, so I started drooling profusely and screaming like a sycho when the bar went down, and he quitened up good.
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ok i got a good, so one day me and 3 other friends went out of bounds and smoke 4 fatty bowls and 1 joint, we were fucking baked!, so we finsih the run then my frinds decide to go in and i figue im going to keep doing runs, so i go up in singles and go up with these to gapers and they make me go int he middle for sum reason and im like sure:), then about a minute up the run i saw a "leedom" sticker on the one guys board, then i start think "i just smoke so much weed strait to "leedom", then id kinda start laughing but not bad, then i look at the other guys board and he has floresent green binding tightener things and for sum reason i just burst out laughing out of control, then they say to each other "its time" and the one guy busts out 2 joints and asks me if i wanted in and i refuseed and said no man i just smoked soooo much already so im good but thx!" then they start talking about the most random shit and im just baked as fuck laughing at the two very unsteezy snow boarders
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well. we had 7 people in the gondi (8 person), and it was already crammed packed. then one more big fat guy comes over and gets in. first thing i notice, hes got a sock on his hand. he saw me staring and hes like "i forgot my glove, so now im wearing a sock as a sock, and a sock as a glove." then he went on to tell how once he had brought 2 left foot boots. then one of my friends was talking about how he had a mole on the back of his ear and the old guy was just rambling on about how if he doesnt cover his, he rips it apart and shit. then i notice the mass amounts of duct tape sticking out of his ear. it was dead silent for like 3 mins and he just randomly said "the girl could smell her mothers farts" we just all laughed our asses off and then it went dead silent again. then right before we got off, he said "abe lincoln could never tell a lie"
we think he had tourettes or something
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This one time a black guy on snowblades and in jeans got on the lift in front of us, and halfway up he lit up a blunt and started smoking, I found it pretty funny/stereotypical.
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the other day i went up with a ski patrol, and he was telling me how he wanted the racers off the mountain (they had practice apparently). it was pretty funny
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so two freinds of mine,identical twins, were riding up the lift. one decides to go pee, so he unzips, spreads his legs and lets the juice flow. at which point his brother yelled to the chair in front "HEY LADY! DO YOU LIKE MY FREINDS COAT?"
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haha except theres an active thread like this in SG
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Mike, that is the funniest thing I have ever heard. why didnt you come skiing w/ us today?
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I rode up with a dee dee dee once and he had like a studdering problem, it was so weird, it took him literally 2 minutes to tell his dad what run he wanted to go down. I got off the lift and just got about 10 feet away from all the people and busted out laughing.
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i was riding with these two gapers which for some reason were both rocking the b-squad bandits (which by the way are worth $800) and they started telling me that they wouldn't go on the Cascade lift until ski patrol deemed it "safe from avalanches".
they also asked my dad where he lived and we told him in a quonset hut in the middle of the forest, and the fuckers believed us!
by the way cascade is a bunny hill.
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