Replying to What to do when your girl dumps you for a snowboarder

So picture this,

I'm unlocking the door to my apartment and I can hear a faint thudding cuming from inside the apartment... I think to myself, "self, it must be your roommate, there is no way your sexy ass gf would be smashing anyone else but yourself" so I easily am able build the confidence to open the door the rest of the way. I walk in and see my roommate eating a bowl of Beefaroni in the kitchen, just in eye shot, so my attention immediately turns to my room... I now can tell the noises are cummin from... My palms begin to sweat, my arms begin to tremble, and my eyes begin to cross, "is this really happening???", I ask myself. There is moaning now and I have completely frozen in place. I creak my head back toward my roommate who shoots me a look of confusion, like he didn't know what I was hearing. I decide to just throw open the door and beat the shit out of this fucking loser, and as soon as I do, I freeze again. There, on the wall, my gf is pleasuring herself with a novelty size dildo. Upside down and facing the wall, there is plethora lady cum all over my fucking wall. (There goes my security deposit) The lesson here, don't trust your snowboard friends, they're all just a bunch of dicks and dildos. PS, if you ever find yourself in this situation, simply button up your saga gear and head right back out into the blizzard, because nothing is worse than having your apparent walls defiled and knowing about it.