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December, 2024

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What a great idea!

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Apple
Posts: 7906 - Karma: 33
I got this in my e-mail and i was shocked that i didnt think of it fist, but i was laughing too hard to care.

A mother passing by her daughter's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then she saw an envelope propped up prominently on the center of the bed. It was addressed, 'Mom.' With the worst premonition, she opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:Dear Mom, It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new boyfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Dad and you. I've been finding real passion with John and he is so nice - even,with all his piercing, tattoos, beard, and his motorcycle clothes. But it's not only the passion mom, I'm pregnant and John said that we will be very happy. He already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. He wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of my dreams too. John taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and we'll be growing, it for us and trading it with his friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so John can get better; he sure deserves it!! Don't worry Mom, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Some day I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.

Your daughter, Judith

PS: Mom, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbour's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card which is in my desk drawer. I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home.

Like a virgin on promnight!

-Thom Savery
please pardon the cacography
----------->Capital.City.Rider.
--->Phunkin.Phatt.Phreerider.

'naahhmahhnahhhahhh ... i mean ... the weekend of monday'
'Go down to the bottom bunk and finish it yourself'
Feb 6 2005 11:49AM
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Kornn101
Posts: 3534 - Karma: 25
aaaaaaaaaaahahahhahahahhahaha thats fucking great, i wish i knew about that
-Anthony
********************
using a key to gouge expletives on anothers vehicle, is a sign of trust, and friendship
Feb 6 2005 11:52AM
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powder_2_the_people
Posts: 1801 - Karma: 13
Goddam it wouldnt work: my nearest neighbors are like 10 k away uphill


WWW.FACTIONSKIS.COM

Jibberish: Minimizing my grades since 2004.
Feb 6 2005 11:59AM
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AJ_concepts
Posts: 903 - Karma: 11
i wish i had known that a couple weeks ago, when i got a speeding ticket
*******************************************************
a good friend will always bail you out of jail, a best friend will be sitting there next to you saying that was fucking awsome

time flies like the wind, fruit flies like bananas
Feb 6 2005 12:12PM
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skiierman
Posts: 28699 - Karma: -5,563
Haha, yeah she is right.





----2ond in Command of DANSA-----



To Huck. v. The act of throwing oneself off of a cornice, cliff, rock, or any other thing that results in an attempt to fly.



If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.



GW Award December 3, 2004
Feb 6 2005 12:14PM
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Sdot
Posts: 2289 - Karma: 15
Holy hell, that's an awesome idea. I should have done that when I did shit wrong. Parents just LOVE to blow things way out of proportion. Ah well, too late now.


Oates
Reppin' 907

''gnothi seauton (know thyself)''
-Phemonoe/Pythagoras
Feb 6 2005 12:51PM
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sugarloaf
Posts: 7866 - Karma: 299
damn I needed to see this Friday, not today. my parents already saw the report card =/



->Colleen





I love r5tommy
Feb 6 2005 1:06PM
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*cowboy*
Posts: 8830 - Karma: 214
that's soooo funnny!

-Jason

[www.theonlywarehouse.com]

[www.option5team.com]
Feb 6 2005 1:28PM
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Craigskis
Posts: 6650 - Karma: 1,645
Pretty Clever...


live by the N.E.R.D
Feb 6 2005 1:32PM
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DAMICO
Posts: 2645 - Karma: 12
clever indeed...

**********************************************************************



My Hardy Boys are killing me... it's no mystery!



*NS Skateboarders Cult*
Feb 6 2005 2:29PM
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SchweitzerSki
Posts: 4479 - Karma: 11
it's so simple and seems so easy to think of. but god dammit i should have thought of that!!!!
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triple it triple it trip-le-it 1! brrrrrrr cha cha cha cha cha cha cha


ba-dum-ching!
Feb 6 2005 2:47PM
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skier_bum
Posts: 395 - Karma: 17
Wow, how come i never think of shit like that?


dont answer that
Feb 6 2005 2:58PM
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Public_Enemy0255
Posts: 2994 - Karma: 17
haha wow thats awesome. i wanna try that


------------------

OOOOOOO sour patch kids...

Feb 6 2005 3:20PM
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freerider_klo
Posts: 1868 - Karma: 14
hahaha, i'm so using this in 1week when my report card comes home.






-Chloe

Skiing=Radical
Feb 6 2005 7:51PM
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french_fry
Posts: 4698 - Karma: 53
thats funny, the thing is that my mom wouldnt really get the message and get even more pissed at me for writing such a letter and scaring her.



Gravity sucks

What's the difference between a drunk and a stoner???
The drunk speeds through the stop sign and the stoner waits for it to turn green
(My real ID is french_hucker)
Feb 6 2005 7:56PM
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freeze_and_burn
Posts: 462 - Karma: 11
haha my mum would freak and then piss herself after!
»-(¯`v´¯)-»PëT®ø HoTt�ë«-(¯`v´¯)-«
Feb 6 2005 8:12PM
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freeze_and_burn
Posts: 462 - Karma: 11
thats just awesome i love that!
»-(¯`v´¯)-»PëT®ø HoTt�ë«-(¯`v´¯)-«
Feb 6 2005 8:12PM
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Pklink04
Posts: 5608 - Karma: 392
wow that was killer, thats what i plan to do with my report card


You know you have the coolest cab driver when he says, 'And we're off like a prom dress.'
Feb 6 2005 8:50PM
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Mattman
Posts: 19108 - Karma: 16
hahaha thats great




Matts a whore and we all know it haha- Lateralis

I almost broke my penis once, i fell down my gfs stairs naked and with a boner, i was never so scared in my life - Lateralis

I have nothing, I dont save anything from ns, i have mostly porn on my comp tho- Lateralis

If I was a fat black chick, id live in a zoo- Lateralis

Hi, My name is Matt and I'm a postaholic

NS Historian
Feb 6 2005 9:00PM
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katesd
Posts: 1483 - Karma: 11
hah yeah i've seen that before... it's pretty funny.


-katie

'Like wow' - Paige
Feb 6 2005 9:08PM
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TheProfitSkier
Posts: 3901 - Karma: 9
what a smart girl... nevermind, she said she had a shitty report card






Its Siver not Silver!
Feb 6 2005 9:11PM
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switch_9
Posts: 876 - Karma: 10
it doesnt work, trust me. i said i got pregnant and no one bought it.



'WHAT THE WTF?!?!!?' -Armada420
Feb 6 2005 10:12PM
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Apple
Posts: 7906 - Karma: 33
really? it worked when i just tried it on the phone... my mom was all talking about how binge drinking is an epidemic at universities according to doctor phill and so i was like yah, im happy im over that drinking thing... Cocane and E are the only things for me nowadays. It scared her into realizing that my drinking habits arnt too bad afterall. i like this new over exageration of the facts thing. im going to use it all the time now
Like a virgin on promnight!

-Thom Savery
please pardon the cacography
----------->Capital.City.Rider.
--->Phunkin.Phatt.Phreerider.

'naahhmahhnahhhahhh ... i mean ... the weekend of monday'
'Go down to the bottom bunk and finish it yourself'
Feb 6 2005 10:27PM
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weazelzb
Posts: 4454 - Karma: 12
haha, my mom would fucken kill me



Some folks look for answers, others look for fights
Some folks up in tree tops, just looking for their kites


Goes to show, you don't ever know
Watch each card you play and play it slow
Feb 6 2005 10:32PM
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Sharpy
Posts: 7596 - Karma: 19
i sued that once, my mom thought I was drinking too much, then I told her that at leats I wasn't dealing and doing cocaine, she kind of got the point

Like a virgin on prom night

You can go on the bottom bunk and finish it yourself

When you guys are on those rails, it's like muah

You A-hole
Feb 6 2005 11:46PM
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t-man152
Posts: 2896 - Karma: 14
haha hope she doesnt stop halffway through the letter and then decide to call people to see if your at their house. If she finds out that your at your neighboors house before reading the PS and doesnt beleive in gun control you better hide
Feb 7 2005 7:39AM
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almostaskier
Posts: 13809 - Karma: 93
ha ha! priceless, i need to try that one, but the getting pregnant part i don't think my parents would buy...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aujourd'hui pour être fun et bigarré, frais et bein formé, il te faut savoir à casser!
Là tu vois tu peux pas répondre: a yé, t'es complétément cassé!

Vis ton cassage et tais toi!

Its NS... retards blend in. - J.D._May

member 53318, o, yea.
Feb 7 2005 11:18AM
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ECboarder698
Posts: 192 - Karma: 10
that was soooo fuckin funny...i dont know if that would work for a guy, too weird...but would work wonders for a girl

-steve

people are stupid.
dont piss me off; im running out out places to put the bodies
Feb 7 2005 3:16PM
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Ericpbp
Posts: 3161 - Karma: 24
HAHA pretty funny. Dont think it would work for me.
------------------------
Flava Flav
300's
Feb 7 2005 3:48PM
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Hctiws_iks
Posts: 2077 - Karma: 25
ut really sucks for the people that actually do coke ect.
what the hell are they gunna say to make this point,
'at least im not psyco and trying to kil you?'

_____________________

Everything under the sun is in tune,
But the Sun is eclipsed by the moon
Feb 7 2005 4:29PM
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Apple
Posts: 7906 - Karma: 33
i dunno, you could always say at least your not suicidal, or a child molester, or beating up old ladies...
Like a virgin on promnight!

-Thom Savery
please pardon the cacography
----------->Capital.City.Rider.
--->Phunkin.Phatt.Phreerider.

'naahhmahhnahhhahhh ... i mean ... the weekend of monday'
'Go down to the bottom bunk and finish it yourself'
Feb 7 2005 4:54PM
0 0
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t-man152
Posts: 2896 - Karma: 14
^HEY leave beating up old ladies out of this. My lifstyle is my own personal decision
Feb 7 2005 8:09PM
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LittleDevil720
Posts: 3719 - Karma: 8
hahahaha nice



'Ever been hit in the head with a golf ball?'
-JF Cusson, making the argument that golf is an extreme sport

Feb 7 2005 8:16PM
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fahrvergcougar
Posts: 306 - Karma: 10
How would a guy do that??
*****************************************



**********

''I'm a MOG: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend.''

''What's the matter Colonel Sanders, CHICKEN?!?!?!''
Feb 7 2005 8:19PM
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skiierman
Posts: 28699 - Karma: -5,563
Easy, with a cane or baseball bat.





----2ond in Command of DANSA-----



To Huck. v. The act of throwing oneself off of a cornice, cliff, rock, or any other thing that results in an attempt to fly.



If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.



GW Award December 3, 2004
Feb 7 2005 8:24PM
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almostaskier
Posts: 13809 - Karma: 93
extra points if its a walker or the cane from said old lady, but yea,^ a baseball bat usually works for me...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aujourd'hui pour être fun et bigarré, frais et bein formé, il te faut savoir à casser!
Là tu vois tu peux pas répondre: a yé, t'es complétément cassé!

Vis ton cassage et tais toi!

Its NS... retards blend in. - J.D._May

member 53318, o, yea.
Feb 8 2005 2:40PM
0 0
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