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How do I take care of a bird?

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Dddsz
Posts: 3042 - Karma: 7,326
Yesterday I was eating a sandwich in my yard when this little guy walked past...


I thought it was a massive morning dove at first, but I noticed a tag on its foot. I grabbed a fishing net and chased it around the yard for a few minutes until I caught it. I googled the code on its tag which told me that it was a lost racing pigeon, nearly 400 miles from its home. I couldn't get ahold of the owner.

I fed it bread and named it Peter. Today I tried to let him go... and he wouldn't leave. He sat on the railing on my porch until I put him back in the cage. Now I have a pet racing pigeon and I don't know what to do. Do any of you have pet birds? How does one properly care for a big bird like this without torturing it?

Jul 14 2016 1:05AM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,488
Race it and make bank
Jul 14 2016 8:26AM
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CheddarJack
Posts: 5203 - Karma: 7,380
Bring it to a city and leave it with other Pigeons maybe?
Jul 14 2016 10:03AM
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JGWI
Posts: 2842 - Karma: 7,812
Lots of good info here


http://www.pigeons.biz/forums/f20/
Jul 14 2016 11:45AM
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coolflash8
Posts: 3171 - Karma: 2,049
give it some potions and revives
Jul 14 2016 12:07PM
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JohnLocke
Posts: 337 - Karma: 1,057
This is your quintessential summer NS thread. Thanks for living up to the expectations OP.
Jul 14 2016 1:00PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51983 - Karma: 166,559
Set it free.

I know why the caged bird sings.
Jul 14 2016 1:43PM
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SKIINGISEASY
Posts: 1552 - Karma: 2,199
First of all, that is not a big bird, that's your first mistake. Big birds are things like eagles, hawks, etc. aka birds that would eat yours like scooby doo would a hamboger.

Second, do you plan on returning this bird? If so, the bird requires a very special diet compromised of macarones and coconut water to stay in pristine condition. The owners will not be happy if you continue to feed it peasant bread you sick son of a bitch.

But, if you could upload a video of the bird and provide stats such a wing length, density of feathers, breast torque (all easy tests to do with cheap tools) then shoot me a pm and I would be willing to meet up and check it out.

source: pidgeon cager for 2 and half years, race official for Enkle Annual Pidgeon Races Webster, Vermont
Jul 14 2016 2:40PM
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Mingg
Posts: 13993 - Karma: 49,693
CheddarJackBring it to a city and leave it with other Pigeons maybe?


Dude that's like taking a suburban white girl and throwing her into the Projects.
Jul 14 2016 2:44PM
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*DUMBCAN*
Posts: 2447 - Karma: 5,628
Eat it, pigeon breast is fucking delicious. You don't even need to gut them to get them off.
Jul 14 2016 2:47PM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,488
*DUMBCAN*. You don't even need to gut them to get them off.


Kind of disturbing that you know how to get a pigeon off
Jul 14 2016 2:49PM
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Rparr
Posts: 5640 - Karma: 47,062
My sister found a bird and kept it when she was a young teenager. After a week she took it to the animal warden or something and they told her everything she was doing for the bird was wrong. So be careful.
Jul 14 2016 2:55PM
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Titus69
Posts: 9329 - Karma: 17,819
just pop its head off and give it to a blind boy in a wheelchair
Jul 14 2016 3:31PM
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PeppermillReno
Posts: 4872 - Karma: -818
Titus69just pop its head off and give it to a blind boy in a wheelchair


UPVOTE^


This post would have been a +50 a week ago....
Jul 14 2016 5:09PM
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PeppermillReno
Posts: 4872 - Karma: -818
BUT OP FOR REAL....


Use this little guy to pick up chicks. Start posting on your social media about how you have a carrier pidgeon. And then tie a note to the pidgeon, drive it to some girls house, drop it off, drive away, and text the chick to go outside and look for the pidgeon who is on his way to deliver a message.


This will get you laid.
Jul 14 2016 5:10PM
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TheFlyingJew
Posts: 86 - Karma: 36
PeppermillRenoBUT OP FOR REAL....


Use this little guy to pick up chicks. Start posting on your social media about how you have a carrier pidgeon. And then tie a note to the pidgeon, drive it to some girls house, drop it off, drive away, and text the chick to go outside and look for the pidgeon who is on his way to deliver a message.


This will get you laid.


TRUUUUUUUUU

using birds to get pussy is the greatest, put that bird on ur shoulder like a pirate and u will have chicks just soaking in their bloomers

just be like hey honey i got dis bird and im ova here now, u wanna come to my pad and sit on my peck
Jul 14 2016 5:22PM
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arnie_grape
Posts: 3455 - Karma: 11,739
send it to the mike tyson mystery team

I hear they are always in need of pigeons
Jul 14 2016 5:49PM
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rsvp
Posts: 1516 - Karma: 2,611
you could make pigeon nuggets
Jul 14 2016 5:58PM
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corona
Posts: 12815 - Karma: 32,948
*DUMBCAN*Eat it, pigeon breast is fucking delicious. You don't even need to gut them to get them off.


Step on the wings and pull on the legs?
Jul 14 2016 9:53PM
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fries
Posts: 2978 - Karma: 7,521
JGWILots of good info here


http://www.pigeons.biz/forums/f20/


Lol screw newschoolers. i'm going to delete my account and join the pigeon forum. They seem like some nice dudes.
Jul 14 2016 10:23PM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,488
VinnieFStep on the wings and pull on the legs?


I feel like pigeons are to fragile for that but maybe not. Works great on grouse and pheasant though
Jul 14 2016 10:25PM
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a_pla5tic_bag
Posts: 9233 - Karma: 5,542

you have one job
Jul 14 2016 10:40PM
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CheddarJack
Posts: 5203 - Karma: 7,380
MinggDude that's like taking a suburban white girl and throwing her into the Projects.


Nah dude I see pigeons this color all the time in cities
Jul 14 2016 11:06PM
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TACO-DOG.exe
Posts: 11989 - Karma: 12,265
get it stoned
Jul 14 2016 11:11PM
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PeppermillReno
Posts: 4872 - Karma: -818
TheFlyingJewTRUUUUUUUUU

using birds to get pussy is the greatest, put that bird on ur shoulder like a pirate and u will have chicks just soaking in their bloomers

just be like hey honey i got dis bird and im ova here now, u wanna come to my pad and sit on my peck


This kid should be swimming in pussy. Loves animals and has 3 hot sisters. Obviously he doesn't want them of course but having direct access to 3 separate female friend groups = lots and lots and lots of girls who love animals and love nice guys who love animals.


OP I gained a lot of respect for you since you showed NS you have some hot sisters DONT waste it you better show what you did for this lovely bird to every single one of their friends so you get multiple dick sucks a night they will be fighting all over you. Nice gestures like this can go a long way you might even be able to pull off a threesome if you play it right. Seriously dude you could really milk this nice gesture of saving this animal for a LOT of pussy if you play your cards right and blow up some friends of your sisters social media with bird pics.

(And if that doesn't appeal to you pm SJW for some buttstuff he prolly is impressed too.)
Jul 15 2016 1:15AM
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Blindsurfer
Posts: 2252 - Karma: 2,799
just put it out of its misery dude its a fucking sky rat
Jul 15 2016 4:27AM
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Dddsz
Posts: 3042 - Karma: 7,326
PeppermillRenoThis kid should be swimming in pussy. Loves animals and has 3 hot sisters. Obviously he doesn't want them of course but having direct access to 3 separate female friend groups = lots and lots and lots of girls who love animals and love nice guys who love animals.


OP I gained a lot of respect for you since you showed NS you have some hot sisters DONT waste it you better show what you did for this lovely bird to every single one of their friends so you get multiple dick sucks a night they will be fighting all over you. Nice gestures like this can go a long way you might even be able to pull off a threesome if you play it right. Seriously dude you could really milk this nice gesture of saving this animal for a LOT of pussy if you play your cards right and blow up some friends of your sisters social media with bird pics.

(And if that doesn't appeal to you pm SJW for some buttstuff he prolly is impressed too.)


I'll use the pigeon to attract more pigeons... then I can release them from a cage during sunset as I passionately get down on one knee and ask a girl to be fuck buddies.
Jul 15 2016 9:25AM
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KravtZ
Posts: 6637 - Karma: 2,629
Flying sewer rat....let that thing go or try way harder to contact the owner through work, etc.

It probably doesn't know how to take care of itself in the wild if its somewhat domesticated
Jul 15 2016 12:11PM
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JAHpow
Posts: 7282 - Karma: 17,182
Wait, have you not heard?
Jul 15 2016 7:54PM
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mmccarthy81
Posts: 413 - Karma: 755
JAHpowWait, have you not heard?


It was to my understanding that everyone had heard
Jul 16 2016 7:44PM
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HamFaceGirl
Posts: 5242 - Karma: 2,675
OP call your state environmental conservation agency. (For New York it's the DEC, but it is different for every state). This is the only post you should follow
Jul 16 2016 7:49PM
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a_burger
Posts: 5244 - Karma: 20,857
mmccarthy81It was to my understanding that everyone had heard


heard what?
Jul 16 2016 7:50PM
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mmccarthy81
Posts: 413 - Karma: 755
a_burgerheard what?


https://youtu.be/2WNrx2jq184
Jul 16 2016 8:21PM
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weedoo
Posts: 650 - Karma: 1,848
Visit a local pet store thag carries birds! I work at a pet store and im sure anyone that works at one near you would be able to set you up with the basics. Im actually serious!
Jul 20 2016 5:21AM
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I_Am_Mod
Posts: 13214 - Karma: 3,753
If you love something, set it free
And if it comes back it's yours!

just like bubbles did with steve french....

https://www.newschoolers.com/videos/watch/833169/Trailer-Park-Boys---Bubbles-Says-Goodbye-to-Steve-French
Jul 20 2016 6:35AM
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Randy_Quench
Posts: 5447 - Karma: 4,343
mmccarthy81https://youtu.be/2WNrx2jq184


upvote
Jul 20 2016 8:27AM
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Caucasian_Asian
Posts: 2447 - Karma: 1,665
.Hugo.I feel like pigeons are to fragile for that but maybe not. Works great on grouse and pheasant though


Roasted squab breast is pretty good with fresh sage and brown butter.
Jul 21 2016 10:33PM
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Blindsurfer
Posts: 2252 - Karma: 2,799
MinggDude that's like taking a suburban white girl and throwing her into the Projects.


but you'd be a fan of that no? plenty of big ass dicks to stuff in your big ass mouth
Sep 10 2016 4:01AM
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Blindsurfer
Posts: 2252 - Karma: 2,799
how on earth did you think it was a mourning dove tho
Sep 10 2016 4:22AM
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Dddsz
Posts: 3042 - Karma: 7,326
Blindsurferhow on earth did you think it was a mourning dove tho


Because it looked like a mourning dove.
Sep 12 2016 7:41PM
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Blindsurfer
Posts: 2252 - Karma: 2,799
SconnieBecause it looked like a mourning dove.


no it didn't. that is not what a mourning dove looks like.
Sep 13 2016 6:10AM
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.otto.
Posts: 3494 - Karma: 12,902
KaneDogFirst of all, that is not a big bird, that's your first mistake. Big birds are things like eagles, hawks, etc. aka birds that would eat yours like scooby doo would a hamboger.

Second, do you plan on returning this bird? If so, the bird requires a very special diet compromised of macarones and coconut water to stay in pristine condition. The owners will not be happy if you continue to feed it peasant bread you sick son of a bitch.

But, if you could upload a video of the bird and provide stats such a wing length, density of feathers, breast torque (all easy tests to do with cheap tools) then shoot me a pm and I would be willing to meet up and check it out.

source: pidgeon cager for 2 and half years, race official for Enkle Annual Pidgeon Races Webster, Vermont


is this real?
Sep 13 2016 8:41AM
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JAHpow
Posts: 7282 - Karma: 17,182
The referenced post has been removed.


Uhhh the average life expectancy of a pigeon is 3-5 years... and considering the age of this thread........
Jun 19 2020 8:35AM
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little1337
Posts: 8294 - Karma: 48,906
I_Am_ModIf you love something, set it free
And if it comes back it's yours!

just like bubbles did with steve french....

https://www.newschoolers.com/videos/watch/833169/Trailer-Park-Boys---Bubbles-Says-Goodbye-to-Steve-French


:( still the saddest moment in television
Jun 19 2020 8:39AM
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Jpurd
Posts: 3196 - Karma: 3,555
theabortionatorSet it free.

I know why the caged bird sings.

So does Mike Hornbeck
Jun 21 2020 9:01AM
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elcheapo
Posts: 3449 - Karma: 13,976
Johnny's seasoning salt at 350° ?
Jun 23 2020 12:00AM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51983 - Karma: 166,559
The referenced post has been removed.

Shits dead af. OP ate that shit the same day he made this thread
Jun 23 2020 12:10AM
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