Member of the Month

KilaTsunami
October, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

Morning wood...

profile picture
NoTeefa
Posts: 9566 - Karma: 129
What causes this?
Jan 17 2005 6:31PM
0 0
profile picture
Ds91260
Posts: 9984 - Karma: 19
naughty dreams


Fuck You
Jan 17 2005 6:32PM
0 0
profile picture
Bob_Loblaw
Posts: 8384 - Karma: 38
the blood drains from your muscles cause you arent using them to move. where else would the blood go?
Jan 17 2005 6:34PM
0 0
profile picture
Tosh
Posts: 3272 - Karma: 675
nice to wake up and play
Jan 17 2005 6:36PM
0 0
profile picture
aclsarescary
Posts: 4010 - Karma: 31
hormones?
Jan 17 2005 6:37PM
0 0
profile picture
Ice-Is-Scary
Posts: 0 - Karma: 87
I think he just gives you a friendly reminder not to forget your duties as a man for the rest of that day


We pay our debt sometimes.
Jan 17 2005 6:38PM
0 0
profile picture
french_fry
Posts: 4698 - Karma: 53
it reminds you it needs a good scratch


Gravity sucks

Today I met my biggest challenge. I had to take a piss in a moving bus.
(My real ID is french_hucker)
Jan 17 2005 6:41PM
0 0
profile picture
bibs_skibum
Posts: 4462 - Karma: 449
ive always wondered what causes morning wood



=======================================

Just shut up and ski.
Jan 17 2005 7:12PM
0 0
profile picture
clrumivier4life
Posts: 2429 - Karma: 9
I personally find it to be very annoying.


SkeeOrDie: I don't hate boarders, I hate fuckers, and 8-year olds that call everyone nigger face.
Jan 17 2005 7:20PM
0 0
profile picture
From_Hell
Posts: 587 - Karma: 10
ahhhh hahah, that's funny ice,

i laugh at morning wood, it's hilarious.
Listen To MORE Heavy Metal!!
Jan 17 2005 7:22PM
0 0
profile picture
winterkid33
Posts: 2267 - Karma: 52
it happens if you dont whack off enough. the extreme of this is a wet dream... not pleasant s many of you know im sure.

sometimes I can, like, read peoples minds... its like I have Espn or something...

'Am I fighting to live or am I living to fight, what am I trying to see if there aint nothin in sight? why am I trying to give, if no one gives me a try? why am I dying to live if I'm just living to die? - Tupac Shakur

...Germans dicovered this city in 1804. They named it san diago... which in german, means giant whale vagina... -Ron burgundy
Jan 17 2005 7:24PM
0 0
profile picture
skiierman
Posts: 28699 - Karma: -5,563
Every guy has at least one wet dream in their life. Don't deny it, because you did or you will have one.





----2ond in Command of DANSA-----



To Huck. v. The act of throwing oneself off of a cornice, cliff, rock, or any other thing that results in an attempt to fly.



If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.



GW Award December 3, 2004
Jan 17 2005 8:15PM
0 0
profile picture
BillyMFBadass
Posts: 576 - Karma: 10
too much water
wouldnt shit ya, you're my favorite terd


'i need to start doin some sweet grabs'-BJ
Jan 17 2005 8:21PM
0 0
profile picture
jflo453
Posts: 1383 - Karma: 26
the worst is whne i wake up and its poking between the slit in my boxers
Ski New Jersey
Jan 17 2005 8:34PM
0 0
profile picture
Sdot
Posts: 2289 - Karma: 15
Ask the Doc.

Q:
What is 'morning wood' caused from?

A:
Presumably you are referring to morning penile erections that most men wake up with?

This is a combination of full bladder causing nerve stimulation resulting in a sometimes inconvenient erection, especially when you need to urinate, and sometimes related to autonomic nervous system response to dreams.

It is normal, an indication that there is no physiologic problem with the ability to get an erection, and goes away spontaneously shortly after waking up.






Sarah

Reppin' 907
Jan 17 2005 8:46PM
0 0
profile picture
lorida
Posts: 2833 - Karma: 46
lol ^
Jan 17 2005 8:49PM
0 0
profile picture
davidh
Posts: 4219 - Karma: 8
I wack off 3-4 times a week and I invariably get a wood every morning. I havent had a wet dream since I learned how to masturbate. It's been a good 4 years. I was thinking about trying to go one month (40 days, 40 nights steeze), but I always fuck it up.
_________________________________________________




no,my parents didnt go to college, my dad has a grade 9 education and my mom is a stupid slut -lateralis

'I don't like people who take drugs... Customs men for example.'


Jan 17 2005 9:03PM
0 0
profile picture
GotamaBCshredder
Posts: 5062 - Karma: 424
I so hate thatdoes it go away when you get older?

impossible is really just a lack of determination

BATTLE RIDGE PRODUCTIONS



You can slide I'd Rather Fly
Jan 17 2005 9:04PM
0 0
profile picture
skiierman
Posts: 28699 - Karma: -5,563
Makes sence with the bladder.





----2ond in Command of DANSA-----



To Huck. v. The act of throwing oneself off of a cornice, cliff, rock, or any other thing that results in an attempt to fly.



If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.



GW Award December 3, 2004
Jan 17 2005 9:04PM
0 0
profile picture
Logchucker
Posts: 1508 - Karma: 16
According to Maxim, Testostrone levels are highest at 9am, so morning means lots of hormones

The smart man does not know everything, rather the smart man admits when he knows nothing.
Jan 17 2005 9:07PM
0 0
profile picture
reezyfbaby
Posts: 2308 - Karma: 13
wacking off too myuch makes your weiner small.
You gotta want that cow bell.
-CCR-
IAN
'everyday should be a good day to die'
-Dave Matthews
Jan 17 2005 9:07PM
0 0
profile picture
Bangor
Posts: 9599 - Karma: 129
my morning wood is weird. it hits about an hour after i get up. usually on the drive to somewhere. so, i'm usually driving with a hard-on 1st thing in the morning, unless i somehow manage to distract my subconcious enough to not pitch a tent. like, when i'm eating and driving.

i'm fucked up.
______________________
- Ian

Home of the Rotating Signature
------------------------------
'My girlfriend would just hit me, and then keep going, or do it back, and gross me out.' - ScratchCobra66, on farting during sex.
------------------------------

~~Phunkin Phatt Phreerider~~
Jan 17 2005 10:34PM
0 0
profile picture
scientist
Posts: 6920 - Karma: 348
it works the night shift


I'm White?


My dad shot a walrus once. Seriously. Im like an eskimo now.
-friedcheese
Jan 17 2005 10:45PM
0 0
profile picture
[~_~]
Posts: 20239 - Karma: 1,273
Maybe because while you are asleep it spends all night resting against somewhat of a vagina shape, but in reality, turns out to be that little slit in your boxers, so it can't help but feel aroused.

-Landis Tanaka
Jan 17 2005 10:50PM
0 0
profile picture
Sdot
Posts: 2289 - Karma: 15
Hahaha Bangor.





Sarah

Reppin' 907
Jan 18 2005 4:22AM
0 0
profile picture
thecoyote
Posts: 1937 - Karma: 14
Sex with morning wood is good...but never AS good.
Jan 18 2005 8:08AM
0 0
profile picture
Jooky
Posts: 1239 - Karma: 37
Christ Bangor, thats some funny shit.

The thing I hate about morning wood is that you have to rest your head against the wall over the toilet to take a piss.....
--------------------

Since we were being extreme for so long I got really hungry so we went to Mcdonalds and got some chicken mcnuggets. -Skimack
Jan 18 2005 11:56AM
0 0
profile picture
skifiend
Posts: 2063 - Karma: 13
^ So true about the pissing thing! It's the worst...you have to bend it down some, and bend over at the waist to compensate for your bonerage sticking strait up. Then as soon as I pee, boner goes right away.

Smuggs kicks ass



Fat skis, Tight trees
Jan 18 2005 12:08PM
0 0
profile picture
hucker22
Posts: 6176 - Karma: 23
ya just walk it off, but it does suck like on vacation with the family in the smae hotel room, i cant really walk that off can i?
__________________



put on whatever makes you attractive

if it's not you then do it for the sake of fashion

your friends like a certain you

that's who you've got to be
Jan 18 2005 12:30PM
0 0
profile picture
petek
Posts: 8762 - Karma: 12
its to prevent you from pissing your pants when you sleep



Domo a regato, mr. roboto
Jan 18 2005 12:33PM
0 0
profile picture
almostaskier
Posts: 13809 - Karma: 93
the morning wood fairy, according to tv, which is wisdom incarnate...
---------------------------------------

Aujourd'hui pour être fun et bigarré, frais et bein formé, il te faut savoir à casser!
Le cassage est un art, ne le pourissez pas!

Là tu vois tu peux pas répondre: t'es amoli, déchiqueté, astiqué et complétement cassé!!!! a yé, t'es prêt a pleurer!

I'm an idiot, so don't mind me...Also, sarcasm is undetectable online...

I'm also a unique creation of God, just like everyone else...
Jan 18 2005 12:40PM
0 0
profile picture
skiierman
Posts: 28699 - Karma: -5,563
Yeah for me I have to like piss at a 90 degree angle with morning wood. The ladies call me Captain Hook. ;)





----2ond in Command of DANSA-----



To Huck. v. The act of throwing oneself off of a cornice, cliff, rock, or any other thing that results in an attempt to fly.



If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.



GW Award December 3, 2004
Jan 18 2005 3:10PM
0 0
profile picture
DynastarriderGP
Posts: 8258 - Karma: 214
it's a pain
Minor Threat Trailer

Peter: When you go on a cruise you need to build up a base tan.
Chris: But I heard that in tanning booths you can get something called Melenoma
Peter: Don't worry son that's just fancy talk for sexified.


Member 957,647,789,468,952,001,657
Jan 18 2005 4:00PM
0 0
profile picture
fattyskier
Posts: 727 - Karma: 11
davidh, you learned to beat off? its not that hard to beat off.... not like a college course is needed for it, you grab your penis and just start movin
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------'I want my penis to employ more people than Microsoft.' - Some kid
Jan 18 2005 4:36PM
0 0
profile picture
Lateralis
Posts: 1228 - Karma: 332
i hate pissing with a fucken boner



'dont jizzz in a hot tub youll have sperm the size of salmon in a week.'

-Astomp17





My time is winding down.............just wait for it
Jan 18 2005 4:38PM
0 0
profile picture
asac
Posts: 12485 - Karma: 17
i always thought morning wood was just a way of, um, 'stretching'.





---------------------
Good Fun With A Hand Gun.

Future Canadian
Jan 18 2005 4:39PM
0 0
profile picture
LittleDevil720
Posts: 3719 - Karma: 8
hahaha bangor, that was great..davidh, no reason for you to be telling us how many times you wack off in a week, makes me feel uncomftorable man..



'Ever been hit in the head with a golf ball?'
-JF Cusson, making the argument that golf is an extreme sport

Jan 18 2005 5:43PM
0 0
profile picture
holyDINOSAURS
Posts: 7038 - Karma: 639
its true about the pussy shaped whole in your boxers...except for me its an actual pussy...so HA!
----------------------------------------

i nailed a chick on saterday night, well sunday morning. then at 815 her friend ran into the room say we are late for church. we need to go. haha i love catholic high school girls

-skiingpimp



im native *beats a drum*

-ontarioskiingsucks

and i'm the government. *beats native over the head with drum and kicks him off his land. serves you right motherfucking shitty drummer

-EastCoastPride







TMC, JC, S3p
Jan 18 2005 9:10PM
0 0
profile picture
jarossamdb7
Posts: 6322 - Karma: -10
ya man waking up
Joe is out of school didnt fucking ask for much Couldnt get a job the marines his last hope Down at the frontline with a gun not a toy Kill many men not asking what for Joe's family the comrades next to him Die one by one his luck is running out Joe wrote back home his parents unemployed The rich is fuckin laughing profits from the war Joe is off to die for another senseless war No arms no legs his mother cries at home Joey wears the flag so proud to fight for us And for a government that doesnt give a fuck
Jan 18 2005 9:20PM
0 0
profile picture
jarossamdb7
Posts: 6322 - Karma: -10
WHAT THE FUCK....


anyways:

ya waking up and your weiner is saying hi through your boxers is suprising and inconvient. one time my friend was trying to wake me up and he tore the sheets off me, it wasnt a good sight. and ya, pissing is annoying with a boner, and it is alot worse when you have to take a shit...

__
Joe is out of school didnt fucking ask for much Couldnt get a job the marines his last hope Down at the frontline with a gun not a toy Kill many men not asking what for Joe's family the comrades next to him Die one by one his luck is running out Joe wrote back home his parents unemployed The rich is fuckin laughing profits from the war Joe is off to die for another senseless war No arms no legs his mother cries at home Joey wears the flag so proud to fight for us And for a government that doesnt give a fuck
Jan 18 2005 9:22PM
0 0
profile picture
MistaSkier
Posts: 1781 - Karma: 17
There's no college course for it? Damn, I guess I won't be doing the whole college thing after all.


Girls don't like sensitive guys. Since I don't treat women like objects, I have to treat objects like women.

'Wayne Gretzky? Isn't that the guy from Wayne's World?' -My infinitely wise cousin
Jan 18 2005 9:30PM
0 0
profile picture
Adamskinick
Posts: 3353 - Karma: 126
god bless it, it gives me an incentive to get up in the morning.
Turtle: Cmon guys get dates, it'll be like Prom! Eric: So I guess that means you won't have a date
Turtle: Fuck you guys, I told you 10,000 fucking times, she had food poisoning!-Entourage HBO
Jan 18 2005 9:47PM
0 0
profile picture
brogilvie
Posts: 2607 - Karma: 123
HAHA, your friend saw you with a BONER.

do the chickens have large talons?
Jan 19 2005 12:56AM
0 0
profile picture
SchweitzerSki
Posts: 4479 - Karma: 11


pitchin' a tent
**************************************
triple it triple it trip-le-it 1! brrrrrrr cha cha cha cha cha cha cha


ba-dum-ching!
Jan 19 2005 1:02AM
0 0
profile picture
Lateralis
Posts: 1228 - Karma: 332
it would suck to have your mom come in and rip the blankets off you and expose your wood



'dont jizzz in a hot tub youll have sperm the size of salmon in a week.'

-Astomp17





My time is winding down.............just wait for it
Jan 19 2005 9:20AM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-5)