Posts: 15084
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Karma: 731
1. Go find some mexicans around King Scoopers or in the park and buy a half gram, or maybe a gram of some shitty black tar heroin, some tin foil, a lighter and a straw.
JUST KIDDING.. lets start again:
1. Use my invite/affiliate code, adrianm3664ue, get a free ride up to $100! Limited time only. Redeem it at uber.com/invite/adrianm3664ue #Uber
2. Cop an UberXL, preferably a new Tahoe or Denali or a Benz G-wagon, thanks to me 100% free, yessir ur set. Denver is a really shitty "city" and isn't worth walking around or seeing anything anyways, in the historical sense that you would in Munich, Paris, Boston, etc.. obviously.
3. Meanwhile ur waiting for your chauffeured big black, low MPG ride with 18 or 19" rims, be on that TINDER GAME SONNN
4. Just be like me and be super charming yet an asshole, no time you'll have SOME bored or horny "lovely female" who is intrigued by your baller status (even though everyone knows about Uber now in 2016...) yet, whatever u gotta say or do, just get her in the whip , and tell you'll tip the driver an extra $10, $20 spot (depending how broke you are )
5. Ahhh! As I didn't explain but was implied, see you already had a small but not too sleezy cooler in the backseat , that has enough alcoholic drinks for her to get quite fucking lit without , u know... having to make the bitch an extra dry vermouth Martini in the back..yaaddadyeamn? Thats not going to happen... We are talking Fireball, Smirnoff something flavored actually, and if ur a G just have it all - some whiskey too for yourself, actually what am i saying...??
You should be spending like $10 TOPS , fuck that, buy POpov for all i care and pour it into a grey goose bottle in the back of a restaurant trash can.... whatever.
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Now, have the driver ignore and put on the the fucking soundtrack, and just tell her ur in town for the Dew Tour or Xgames or whatever it doesnt matter...
If she calls you out cause she actually knows and shred, like legit.. then just start making out with her and fuck her in the back seat of the Denali as you preferably cruise at least like I said to Boulder or somewhere kind of Scenic, and then back..
6. Drop her off, and definitely go to any of the recreational ganja stores and before your flight back home, buy as MUCH bud , edibles, oils, shatter, resin, etc. as you can possibly max out your or your loved ones/families credit card and then just don't even STRESS it just put it in your carry on , or whatuv and hit the DIA, wasted, laid, Tindered, real chiefed out on that black tar , hmm and a beautiful charming view of the mountains you never even got close to ....
And then go through security, and fly back home with treats for Xmas for your family ,friends of THC and CBDs and u definitely won't get fucked at security/before boarding.
Ur welcome.
-Y.E.