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Chubz.Never. Idk what the point of it is..I never use the damn thing.
Op.Androids have flashlights too. #allphonesmatter
shin-bangHere babe I'll teach you
1337How many times has your iphone camera flash fucked you over? You know, when you go to take a sneaky photo and it goes off.
shin-bangOh my gosh, I have a bunch of stories
1337How many times has your iphone camera flash fucked you over? You know, when you go to take a sneaky photo and it goes off.
shin-bangOh my gosh, I have a bunch of stories
Chubz.I hate when I'm trying to snap pics of all the milf's asses at whole foods and my flash goes off.
If i had a dollar for every time I've been smacked in the last month..
SammyDubztaking tips from Felice I see
Chubz.Felice takes tips from me..
1337How many times has your iphone camera flash fucked you over? You know, when you go to take a sneaky photo and it goes off.
CaptainObvious.It was a normal day.
I had just bought myself an amazing lunch: a chicken club sandwich with handmade coleslaw and steak fries. I sat at my table and mindlessly read through the menu as I waited for my food. The bell rings. A younger couple walks in. The younger guy with sandy blonde hair, a straight jaw, and a leather bomber jacket motions to the hostess that they would like a table for two. She smiles at him through teeth that have been flashed a thousand times for a thousand customers. Her name tag reads, "Emily." Her hair has a brilliant brunette glow masked by a layer of frizz and kitchen grease. Her eyes glaze over as she walks the 20 feet to the end of the diner. A walk she could do blind. She sets the menus down, flashes the teeth again and turns on her heel. I watch her as she saunters my way and catch her eye. I bring up the right side of my smile in a genuine and sympathetic kind of way. She returns the smile just as she draws next to me and I catch a glimpse of what seems to be just a little bit too wet of a bright blue eye. Before she hits the host stand I get up and shuffle to the other side of my table. Now I have an unobstructed view of the host stand. I keep my eyes on Emily; I'm anxious for her to turn. I want to catch those blue eyes again. I want her to know there is someone in that diner that sees her. I want her to come past my table again so I can say something to her. What would I say? What can I say that's clever enough to make her laugh, but innocent enough to let her know I care.
Emily turns and scans the restaurant. She looks over my head on purpose so she doesn't get caught looking at me. I don't break my sight. She makes her second pass and locks her eyes on mine. I wave her over.
What am I doing? I can't just wave her over. I can't....but she's coming over. Her eyes on the ground. Her smile curved in a way I haven't seen today. I can feel my heart in my ears. How am I going to hear her voice with this throbbing in my head?
"Do you need something?" Her voice is soft, quiet, almost like a whisper being sung.
"Can you sit down?" I ask out of instinct, realizing immediately how stupid that question was.
"I'm sorry, I can't while I'm on the clock."
"Oh. "
"But when I'm off in an hour I would love to sit with you."
"Oh!"
"Can we meet somewhere else though?" Her eyes shift to the right and dart through the kitchen.
It's been three weeks since that day in the diner and it feels like months. My wrists burn. I can feel the rope cutting through them. What I thought was sweat trickling down to my elbow I now realize could be blood. I need to figure out how to get out of here. The rank smell chokes my breath out of me. The heat seems to press in on me and squeeze the sweat from every pore of my body. The fine thread of rope I've been pulling on comes free. There's a crash. I can hear yelling in Spanish. It sounds like they're down the hallway, but I can't see anything, so the door could be anywhere. I wrap the thread around my finger and pull. The rope weakens. I twist my wrist, fighting through the agony and feel the rope give just enough to slip my wrist through. As soon as it's free I move over and untie my other hand. My fingers tingle as the blood starts to flow back into them. I start to walk through the dark and slip on a puddle of god knows what. I lose my balance. My head connects with something metal and solid. The overwhelming darkness of the room is suddenly full of white spots. The Spanish ceases. I struggle to my hands and knees and frantically feel around for my backpack. After what feels like an eternity I find it. I reach into the side pocket and pull out my iPhone. I slide up and hit the flashlight. I'm in a broom closet. There's one door and I can hear footsteps coming. I scan the room and see an air duct. I run over to it and slide the cover off. With my backpack shouldered I slide into the air duct and shimmy down the tube. After about 20 feet the duct turns right and I can see daylight. I shimmy faster. The smell of clean air. The sound of cars driving. Chatter of passerby. I get close up to the grate, lie on my back, and kick.
One things for sure......thank Christ for my iPhone flashlight.
