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A boy pooped on my floor

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Mingg
Posts: 13978 - Karma: 49,320
Last night I came home to find my roommate throwing a party in my apartment. It's pretty typical cause she's in a frat so these things aren't out of the ordinary. I had my stats exam this morning so I just went up to bed to study/get some sleep. Not exactly sure who was here or what happened last night but I woke up this morning for my test and went down stairs to a disaster of an apartment and a god awful smell. After 15 seconds of searching for the source I found a pile of shit, a literal shit, on my bathroom floor as well as vomit in various areas of my downstairs. I left because I didn't have time to spare and figured my roommate would be up soon to clean it up anyways.


Well, I just got home and the apartment is still trashed. There is still shit on the floor and it smells about 36 times gnarlier than when I left. My roommate is nowhere to be found and I don't think I can stomach the smell anymore. I'm really not about to clean up someone else's shit but if I have to... it's not going unnoticed.


So NS, how to I handle this? Do I clean it up like nothing happened or do I have some fun with it. Help me out, eh?
Dec 12 2015 12:31PM
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AgitatedHiatus
Posts: 319 - Karma: 1,053
Lie in wait for her to get home.
When she gets home jump out
Grab her and shove her face into the shit to show her you are dominant
Make her clean it up.







Seriously though that's fucking dumb. I'd call her and ask her what the fuck and tell her to clean it up. BUT if you have to clean it up because it smells so bad, clean it, and then bitch out your dumb ass roommate later.
Dec 12 2015 12:38PM
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Mr.noodle
Posts: 1361 - Karma: 4,651
Put it on your roommates bed or pillow. Also in the dresser, or I would highly recommend the shoe
Dec 12 2015 12:45PM
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Mingg
Posts: 13978 - Karma: 49,320
Mr.noodlePut it on your roommates bed or pillow. Also in the dresser, or I would highly recommend the shoe


Should I put it on her heater?

I texted her and she said she wouldn't be home for a couple hours.
What's better than a steaming pile of shit to make your day better?
Dec 12 2015 12:47PM
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Rennis_Deynolds
Posts: 2739 - Karma: 19,059
use a shovel, put in under her blanket
Dec 12 2015 12:53PM
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MustBeMattyB
Posts: 495 - Karma: 2,147
how do you know it was a boy?
Dec 12 2015 1:05PM
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Mingg
Posts: 13978 - Karma: 49,320
MustBeMattyBhow do you know it was a boy?


Simple, girls don't poop.
Dec 12 2015 1:07PM
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Mr.noodle
Posts: 1361 - Karma: 4,651
MinggShould I put it on her heater?

I texted her and she said she wouldn't be home for a couple hours.
What's better than a steaming pile of shit to make your day better?


That sounds like it would make the smell 100x worse, I'd just go with the shoes or just smear a little bit in some of her clothes
Dec 12 2015 1:07PM
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SkiBum.
Posts: 3600 - Karma: 3,909
Just jealous you didn't get that steamer on your chest
Dec 12 2015 1:32PM
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deleted5
Posts: 14507 - Karma: 13,507
MinggIt's pretty typical cause she's in a frat so these things aren't out of the ordinary. ?


?
Dec 12 2015 1:40PM
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deleted5
Posts: 14507 - Karma: 13,507
Now that I read through the entire thing no pun intended but clean that shit up. Seriously be an adult clean up the things that smell in the house, so it doesn't smell anymore, and then deal with everything else later.
Dec 12 2015 1:42PM
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Dddsz
Posts: 3042 - Karma: 7,324
Pics or it didn't happen.
Dec 12 2015 2:07PM
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Ian_Fitz
Posts: 826 - Karma: 6,509
On the bright side, "the shit didn't hit the fan. " No but if this was me I would say stop throwing partys with weird ass people who would shit on my floor. Then id take their toothbrush and rub it in the shit and wash it off enough so its not noticeable and put it back with their stuff.
Dec 12 2015 2:18PM
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miroz
Posts: 10333 - Karma: 3,945
nocturnalNow that I read through the entire thing no pun intended but clean that shit up. Seriously be an adult clean up the things that smell in the house, so it doesn't smell anymore, and then deal with everything else later.


This. Besides, you live there too, and it's not gonna get any better if you wait. Just clean it up and then your roommate will owe you big time. And if she doesn't pay it back, you can return the favor by pooping on her shit.
Dec 12 2015 2:18PM
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edai
Posts: 4988 - Karma: 4,658
Find a new roomate on god thats actually the most disrespectful situation ive ever heard. take pics/document this and get in her fucking face when you give her the boot
Dec 12 2015 2:23PM
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edai
Posts: 4988 - Karma: 4,658
Find a new roomate on god thats actually the most disrespectful situation ive ever heard. take pics/document this and get in her fucking face when you give her the boot
Dec 12 2015 2:23PM
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ModMommy
Posts: 10817 - Karma: 57,210
2 things-
is she in a frat or sorority
and
make her responsible. Do you have a roommate agreement? If not draw one up with her, that shit is uncool, and at your ages she should know damn well to clean up her messes.
Dec 12 2015 2:58PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,273
Fart in all of her food in the apartment so whenever she eats she's eating your farts
Dec 12 2015 3:02PM
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Deforestation
Posts: 1606 - Karma: 3,194
Use the shit as leverage. You clean it up, she owes you new skis or something.
Dec 12 2015 3:44PM
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SSteezle
Posts: 9297 - Karma: 7,719
brush up the shit with your roommates toothbrush
Dec 12 2015 4:11PM
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Mingg
Posts: 13978 - Karma: 49,320
SourSteezlebrush up the shit with your roommates toothbrush


hahahahaha I like this idea the most.


Will report back, I'm heading home from the library now. I wonder if there is still shit on my floor.
Dec 12 2015 4:44PM
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im_Mongo
Posts: 109 - Karma: 177
I know some weirdos that go to house parties and shit in weird places. e.g. someone did one on a plate and put it in the fridge.
Dec 12 2015 5:03PM
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Deepskier
Posts: 3267 - Karma: 4,829
If she has a fan in her room put it on there so she turns it on because it smells like shit ten she get sprayed and her room is trashed or smear it in her shoes, food or just make little streaks in her panties and show all the guys
Dec 12 2015 10:18PM
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elcornholio
Posts: 797 - Karma: 1,556
http://www.esafetysupplies.com/DuPont-Tychem-TK-Level-A-Protective-Suit.html?gclid=Cj0KEQiAqK-zBRC2zaXc8MOiwfIBEiQAXPHrXnXzllvGRIokcKlo7PX3HHuOU6rGbnHJbqS5MDjjT8EaArL58P8HAQ
Dec 12 2015 10:23PM
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SammyDubz
Posts: 2168 - Karma: 7,222
wait how is she in a frat
Dec 12 2015 10:56PM
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Mingg
Posts: 13978 - Karma: 49,320
SammyDubzwait how is she in a frat


It's a coed business frat
Dec 12 2015 10:58PM
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CaptainObvious.
Posts: 5712 - Karma: 20,638
My sig is relevant
Dec 12 2015 11:02PM
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Mingg
Posts: 13978 - Karma: 49,320
CaptainObvious.My sig is relevant


It's a different roommate!!!!!!



Okay, so update. I came home from the library and the apartment was still a mess. So I started to clean it up. I really thought NS would come through with some creative ways to be a dick... but I guess this thread didn't turn into that.

Anyways, I cleaned it up and it was really boring. But I did leave a little surprise in her stocking, shampoo, mouthwash, and coin jar. I think I have won this round.
Dec 12 2015 11:07PM
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a_pla5tic_bag
Posts: 9215 - Karma: 5,398
MinggIt's a different roommate!!!!!!



Okay, so update. I came home from the library and the apartment was still a mess. So I started to clean it up. I really thought NS would come through with some creative ways to be a dick... but I guess this thread didn't turn into that.

Anyways, I cleaned it up and it was really boring. But I did leave a little surprise in her stocking, shampoo, mouthwash, and coin jar. I think I have won this round.


If you had joined the party, you could have hopefully found your drunk/passed out roommate and recreated the pooped on a girl thread on her, i.e. making her think she shit her bed.
Dec 12 2015 11:15PM
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nutz.
Posts: 3150 - Karma: 6,712
MinggIt's a different roommate!!!!!!



Okay, so update. I came home from the library and the apartment was still a mess. So I started to clean it up. I really thought NS would come through with some creative ways to be a dick... but I guess this thread didn't turn into that.

Anyways, I cleaned it up and it was really boring. But I did leave a little surprise in her stocking, shampoo, mouthwash, and coin jar. I think I have won this round.


Smear it all over her window, on the inside
Dec 12 2015 11:49PM
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Sno.
Posts: 12155 - Karma: 6,152
CaptainObvious.My sig is relevant


my sig is super relevant as well.
Dec 13 2015 12:18AM
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Sno.
Posts: 12155 - Karma: 6,152
how do you know it was a boy? cause girls don't shit?
Dec 13 2015 12:20AM
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Deforestation
Posts: 1606 - Karma: 3,194
MustBeMattyBhow do you know it was a boy?


MinggSimple, girls don't poop.


Sno.how do you know it was a boy? cause girls don't shit?


.
Dec 13 2015 12:38AM
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Sno.
Posts: 12155 - Karma: 6,152
Isis_rocks.


yeah, clearly I didn't read the thread...but I got the answer right!
Dec 13 2015 12:49AM
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The.Fish
Posts: 2269 - Karma: 4,988
Can't be as worse as that one guy with a bowel disorder who shat on his girlfriend while losing his virginity. He posted the story on ns and it was HILARIOUS.
Dec 13 2015 1:00AM
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11954 - Karma: 12,298
So....??? Chill the fuck out and put it on your
Chest or something
Dec 13 2015 1:09AM
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CHORIZO
Posts: 2003 - Karma: 10,039
Starving college student eh?

https://www.newschoolers.com/videos/watch/800641/Bear-Grylls-Eats-Shit
Dec 13 2015 1:44AM
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49566738265
Posts: 0 - Karma: 7,704
Sounds like someone doesn't have to pay rent this month.
Dec 13 2015 4:21AM
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soulskier
Posts: 17806 - Karma: 3,841
Op.Pics or it didn't happen.


Please....don't post that shit
Dec 13 2015 4:54AM
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Twinjibber77
Posts: 6239 - Karma: 2,354
I've seen much worse in a casual trip to UB. Can you do some exploitation and find out if it was a small asian boy poop or a regular size dude poop? If it's the later, I wouldn't touch it and go somewhere else only to come home later and act super pissed.
Dec 13 2015 7:16AM
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shotvet
Posts: 302 - Karma: 1,614
MinggBut I did leave a little surprise in her stocking, shampoo, mouthwash, and coin jar. I think I have won this round.


Cross your fingers she doesn't get hepatitis. YIKES
Dec 13 2015 9:01AM
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deleted5
Posts: 14507 - Karma: 13,507
The referenced post has been removed.


This post has been deleted?
Dec 13 2015 11:28AM
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.lencon
Posts: 6753 - Karma: 17,183
Hasn't someone pooped on your floor before?
Dec 13 2015 12:33PM
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Mingg
Posts: 13978 - Karma: 49,320
.lenconHasn't someone pooped on your floor before?


YEAH. This is the second time in 2 months.
Dec 13 2015 12:43PM
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nutz.
Posts: 3150 - Karma: 6,712
MinggIt's a coed business frat


akpsi?
Dec 13 2015 1:19PM
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HAMNATION
Posts: 814 - Karma: 1,720
MinggYEAH. This is the second time in 2 months.


it's shitfaced not shitfloored
Dec 13 2015 1:33PM
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Deepskier
Posts: 3267 - Karma: 4,829
MinggYEAH. This is the second time in 2 months.


Lol thought I read this a while ago
Dec 13 2015 9:19PM
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Peter.
Posts: 23796 - Karma: 13,014
Minggshe's in a frat


wat
Dec 13 2015 9:30PM
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OregonDead
Posts: 6900 - Karma: 24,611
.lenconHasn't someone pooped on your floor before?

Came here to ask this. Good work lencon.
MinggYEAH. This is the second time in 2 months.


WTF is up with boys in Buffalo? Please tell me this has nothing to do with beef on weck. I really want to romanticize that sandwich.
Dec 14 2015 2:23PM
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TheBigApple
Posts: 1169 - Karma: 488
Jesus Christ what kind of shit rat low lifes do you live with? In no world is any of this acceptable behavior. Can you kick her out? Have her arrested? Stop paying your rent? She didn't clean this shit up after herself?

Wow.

Your roomate is the lowest form of life on earth.
Dec 14 2015 6:36PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51674 - Karma: 162,644
Maybe your roommate shit on the floor.
Dec 14 2015 10:38PM
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