Replying to Critique my college essay! (It's about skiing)

Heyo, if you guys could give my college essay a read an tell me what you think, I'd appreciate it! I know it's kinda "gaper speak", but it has to be for someone who could possibly know nothing about skiing!

Any improvements, compliments, or suggestions are appreciated!



The cold winter air blows against my jacket; Soft white snow crunches beneath my skis and the world stands still as I stare at the end of a black metal rail. I think to myself, "I can do this... I can do this..." As I go through the motions for the fiftieth time, I feel like this is what I've been waiting for: ever since the first day I saw someone throw down in at my local mountain's terrain park, ever since I got my first pair of twin tipped skis, ever since I decided that I was going to be a park skier. I click my poles, push off, and get ready to hit my very first rail. Freestyle skiing has always been a big part of who I am. It's the reason I love winter, the cold, and the snow. As fall comes to an end and temperatures begin to drop, I've already spent countless hours training in my backyard. Before I even hit the slopes, I've practiced every flip, every spin, and every rail trick I plan on mastering on snow. A big wooden structure in my backyard covered in AstroTurf allows me to hit rails all year long, and an old trampoline helps me get enough air to dial down any rotation. Once winter comes, the real fun begins. I make an effort to ski as many times as possible, since snow only comes for a few short months. Pushing myself constantly, I ski the inside and outside the terrain park. Being a well-rounded skier makes challenges easier to take on, be it a flip or a double black diamond. Skiing through the woods believe it or not can help you feel more comfortable on rails, and fine tuning mogul skills can help you with jump takeoffs. I don't spend all of my time in the terrain park, so I try to make the mountain my playground. Whether it's shredding through the trees, or boosting off of a mogul, challenging myself is my favorite part of skiing. I enjoy a double black diamond as much as I enjoy learning to 540. There is always something to learn, somewhere to improve. Every time I go, I learn something different. Skiing has, is, and always will be, an incredible adventure that I will pursue till the day I die.