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Unrealized sexual fantasies?

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ESAND
Posts: 1607 - Karma: 744
I've checked off a lot from the sexy time bucket list but there is one that I've never figured out how to bring up in a conversation. In fact I don't think I've ever mentioned it before to anyone. Well, clothed in the semi anonymity of an internet forum here it goes

During sex I want a girl to be 100% silent and still as she orgasms and then when she finishes to turn to me and then with her greatest Julie Andrews impression say, "How kind of you to let me come". Extra points if at a random point later on she adds, "In Hartford, Hereford and Hampshire, hurricanes hardly happen."

Does anyone else have incredibly odd fantasies that they can't tell there partner.

Can I rule 34 mine?
Apr 3 2015 5:18PM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,484
you scare me
Apr 3 2015 5:37PM
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Chubz.
Posts: 13918 - Karma: 25,661
The referenced post has been removed.


I want to fuck all the kardashians at the same time
Apr 3 2015 5:39PM
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Jane6
Posts: 5359 - Karma: 4,506
Apr 3 2015 5:42PM
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RICK_ROSS
Posts: 6983 - Karma: 3,343
you lost me at Julie Andrews
Apr 3 2015 5:44PM
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.Rybak.
Posts: 9017 - Karma: 9,864
I want to shake Jane6's hand vigorously.
Apr 4 2015 3:19PM
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Jane6
Posts: 5359 - Karma: 4,506
.Rybak.I want to shake Jane6's hand vigorously.


this could be us but ure playing


Apr 4 2015 3:22PM
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.Rybak.
Posts: 9017 - Karma: 9,864
Jane6this could be us but ure playing




Apr 4 2015 3:25PM
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JohnLocke
Posts: 337 - Karma: 1,057
I can already tell the direction this thread is going in
Apr 4 2015 3:30PM
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ZachAndCheese
Posts: 816 - Karma: 5,116
Jane6


Have sex with a fish and a whale???
Apr 4 2015 3:56PM
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daannnnieel
Posts: 5163 - Karma: 4,293
wait what

how the fuck am I supposed to post something that is not yet realized. You're a scammer.
Apr 4 2015 10:08PM
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shane.t
Posts: 729 - Karma: 364
One of these days when I'm having sex I'm just gonna randomly stick it in her butt and yell "SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER"
Apr 4 2015 10:41PM
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ESAND
Posts: 1607 - Karma: 744
shane.tOne of these days when I'm having sex I'm just gonna randomly stick it in her butt and yell "SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER"


I've never had the balls to say it out loud but back when I was a hard core high school kid I pretty much randomly stuck my thumb up the ass of any drunk chick I could hook up with and I definitely thought it more than a few times.

Yup. That pretty much sums up my sexual experiences in high school. Shoving digits up her ass while either trying not to puke or taking a swing from my beer.
Apr 4 2015 11:07PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51595 - Karma: 161,755
I want to stick my dick in a girl. A real girl not just my couch. I hope I can find a girl into that at some point. Till then I'll just watch porn and practice with my couch.
Apr 5 2015 12:11AM
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Jane6
Posts: 5359 - Karma: 4,506
ZachAndCheeseHave sex with a fish and a whale???




I like the smell of fish in the morning, ok?
Apr 5 2015 9:24AM
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PacificRimJob
Posts: 24725 - Karma: 29,944
Jane6I like the smell of fish in the morning, ok?


Of course you do. You're swedish.
Apr 5 2015 9:30AM
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PacificRimJob
Posts: 24725 - Karma: 29,944
I just want to have sex using my unit while riding on a unicycle, writing a state of the union speech using a uniball pen on my way to a teachers union meeting at the unitarian church.
Apr 5 2015 9:32AM
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Jane6
Posts: 5359 - Karma: 4,506
DingoSeanOf course you do. You're swedish.



Haha I was expecting a "just spread your legs then heuheheuu"
Apr 5 2015 10:22AM
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.Rybak.
Posts: 9017 - Karma: 9,864
Jane6Haha I was expecting a "just spread your legs then heuheheuu"


Just spread your legs then.
Apr 5 2015 10:25AM
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Jane6
Posts: 5359 - Karma: 4,506
.Rybak.Just spread your legs then.


Apr 5 2015 11:04AM
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Laurent.
Posts: 10056 - Karma: 25,313
Jane6


Apr 5 2015 11:10AM
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KravtZ
Posts: 6637 - Karma: 2,629
I was recently dating this chick for a while who was a sexual maniac. She let me do anthing I wanted to try. Butt sex, and position I could possibly think (or research lol), choking, she loved her ass to get bitten, squeezing her nips really hard. After a while it kind of turned me off because she was so fucking crazy. But was real fun for a while
Apr 5 2015 11:11AM
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Toaster-Tony
Posts: 3531 - Karma: 5,850
girls with weird hair colors

banging in spontanious places

rough make-up sex

and anything that involves a midgets, the sound of velcro, and a parking ticket
Apr 5 2015 11:30AM
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Toaster-Tony
Posts: 3531 - Karma: 5,850
The referenced post has been removed.


No but it sounds like an excellent ice breaker for first dates
Apr 5 2015 12:01PM
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PacificRimJob
Posts: 24725 - Karma: 29,944
One of my favourite things to ask chicks on tinder who I have no intention of ever meeting..

"do you blumpkin?"
Apr 5 2015 12:52PM
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snapped
Posts: 109 - Karma: 251
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The referenced post has been removed.



You really want to get this out there don't you?
Apr 5 2015 12:58PM
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snapped
Posts: 109 - Karma: 251
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The referenced post has been removed.


The referenced post has been removed.


already need to update my own comment
Apr 5 2015 1:01PM
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robbinJAHood
Posts: 1202 - Karma: 3,075
hot candle wax
Apr 5 2015 1:21PM
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Dustin.
Posts: 13839 - Karma: 7,704
DingoSeanOne of my favourite things to ask chicks on tinder who I have no intention of ever meeting..

"do you blumpkin?"


Mine is: "What's your favorite Will Smith movie?"
Apr 5 2015 2:04PM
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Byron_tha_gr8
Posts: 4573 - Karma: 14,299
savvy_skihot candle wax


ahaha my girlfriend's favorite.

I just found this body oil/wax candle made purely for sexy times. The wax is made to clean up super easily and be a little less hot than real candle wax.
Apr 5 2015 2:21PM
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PacificRimJob
Posts: 24725 - Karma: 29,944
Dustin.Mine is: "What's your favorite Will Smith movie?"


Mine's Shark Tale.
Apr 5 2015 2:31PM
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IKEA
Posts: 622 - Karma: 3,111
I want to be the baby
Apr 5 2015 4:18PM
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Spagett+
Posts: 3499 - Karma: 14,884


I look like this in my sexual fantasies.
Apr 5 2015 4:18PM
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RICK_ROSS
Posts: 6983 - Karma: 3,343
BearGrillsI want to be the baby


call the authorities that baby isnt safe
Apr 5 2015 4:24PM
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Jane6
Posts: 5359 - Karma: 4,506
North.West


I look like this in my sexual fantasies.



that is literally a pic of you with a wig


Apr 5 2015 5:28PM
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11954 - Karma: 12,297
Sex in a gondola. Dont ask me why, but I want, nay, need it. GF said ill at least get to 3rd base before closing day, ill take that for now. Plus Loons gondi is too small for sex, gotta go to Killy for that.
Apr 5 2015 5:35PM
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Spagett+
Posts: 3499 - Karma: 14,884
Jane6that is literally a pic of you with a wig





OMG Doppelgänger with Jim Morrison! That is the greatest compliment I have ever received. Thank you.
Apr 5 2015 6:08PM
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Nikolaus
Posts: 863 - Karma: 995
actually having sex
Apr 5 2015 6:48PM
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Daph
Posts: 5978 - Karma: 5,006
Granite_StateSex in a gondola. Dont ask me why, but I want, nay, need it. GF said ill at least get to 3rd base before closing day, ill take that for now. Plus Loons gondi is too small for sex, gotta go to Killy for that.


My primary goal in life is to have sex in big sky's tram. This summer I'm gonna use my work privilege and make it happen
Apr 5 2015 7:25PM
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notspoicey
Posts: 1167 - Karma: 1,706
North.WestOMG Doppelgänger with Jim Morrison! That is the greatest compliment I have ever received. Thank you.


Lol no
Apr 5 2015 7:27PM
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snapped
Posts: 109 - Karma: 251
pee in her butt
Apr 5 2015 7:28PM
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.Rybak.
Posts: 9017 - Karma: 9,864
YoungDaphMy primary goal in life is to have sex in big sky's tram. This summer I'm gonna use my work privilege and make it happen


I can make that happen.
Apr 5 2015 7:29PM
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robbinJAHood
Posts: 1202 - Karma: 3,075
Granite_StateSex in a gondola. Dont ask me why, but I want, nay, need it. GF said ill at least get to 3rd base before closing day, ill take that for now. Plus Loons gondi is too small for sex, gotta go to Killy for that.


goals
Apr 5 2015 7:31PM
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Daph
Posts: 5978 - Karma: 5,006
.Rybak.I can make that happen.


My boyfriend would probably be upset with me
Apr 5 2015 7:56PM
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plyswthsqrrls
Posts: 838 - Karma: 2,271
YoungDaphMy boyfriend would probably be upset with me


Apr 5 2015 8:15PM
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Ghoster
Posts: 261 - Karma: 1,871
Having sex with a girl doggy style, while using her back as a table to hold the pizza that I am eating.

Diagram for clarity

Apr 5 2015 8:20PM
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.Rybak.
Posts: 9017 - Karma: 9,864
YoungDaphMy boyfriend would probably be upset with me


Even better.
Apr 5 2015 8:33PM
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Spagett+
Posts: 3499 - Karma: 14,884
ginLol no


it isn't?
Apr 5 2015 9:32PM
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ModMommy
Posts: 10813 - Karma: 57,131
definitely anal
Apr 6 2015 12:43AM
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PacificRimJob
Posts: 24725 - Karma: 29,944
safarisamdefinitely anal


It's not that fun.
Apr 6 2015 7:44AM
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DayMan
Posts: 4704 - Karma: 8,748
DingoSeanIt's not that fun.


Were you giving or receiving?
Apr 6 2015 9:33AM
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