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Create a shrink ray and find the girl of choice. Get an overly fat man to be with you as well. Shrink the two of you down real small, then the fat man (that to us shouldvery acquired and brought with you) pick you up and eat you. Then you guys can chill out in the fat a man's stomach. He is fat so it will be warm and cozy for you guys. You can start a life within his stomach, have kids, create a life together, grow old, die...together
There is a practice in Kyrgyzstan known as "kidnapping" brides. There is a Vice documentary on it. Watch it, you may learn a few tricks.
After viewing it, gather a few friends and devise a plan. Maybe you've seen a cute girl at school, perfect- she'll do. Get a car and have your buddies ride in it with you as you follow her home one day. When the moment is right, park the car, jump out and grab her. Bring her back to your place and have your female relatives convince her that going on a date with you is the right thing to do. Take her on said date. You now have a girlfriend.
