BrandoComandoFuck man. Tonight was really hard. Family makes things complicated. Long story ahead.
Last July, my girlfriend and I rented a house together. While we were looking, I asked my little bro if he wanted to stay with us. He’s a senior in college and I offered to rent him a room for cheap. He’s taken me up on this deal his sophomore and junior years when I lived in an apartment.
This house is 3br 2ba. The master for my gf and I, one for my bro, and one guest room/office. A month into living here, my bro asks if his gf can move into the spare room. I’m hesitant, but I give in because it helps with rent and I’d feel hypocritical for denying his gf, while living with my own.
It was a mistake. I lose my office, which I need for working from home and doing online grad school. Family and friends can’t visit because they have nowhere to stay. My brother and his gf are messier, and we have to clean up after them a lot. None of it was overly shitty roommate behavior. But it’s the kind of stuff I put up with when I had roomies in undergrad. But I’m not in undergrad anymore. I can afford my own place and I don’t need to put up with stuff like dirty dishes, forgetting to lock the doors, forgetting to close the garage, leaving shit in the laundry for days, not being respectful of quiet hours, etc.
My gf and I suck it up for a few months. Fast forward to February. My gf is a nurse and gets transferred to night shift. Suddenly, stuff like being loud during the day becomes a lot more detrimental. She can’t sleep so she’s almost falling asleep at work. She can’t cook her lunches because their dishes are all over the sink and stove. She can’t clean her scrubs because they’re inconsiderate with the laundry. I can’t help because I’m at my job and doing grad school during the day. We talk to my bro and his gf but they just aren’t getting it. My relationship with my gf starts getting affected. She’s so frustrated and sleep deprived that she can’t help but lose patience and get upset with me over little things.
It gets worse and worse until last week, when my gf said she can’t take living in this house anymore. She’s going to move out. My bro and his gf are too inconsiderate, and she needs a place to live where she can focus on work. My gf has her name on the lease with me. This was our house together. I let my little brother move in as a favor to save him a little money while he’s in college. I tell her that she’s not moving out. If it’s come to this, then I’ll ask my little bro and his gf to move out. They can have until the end of March to find a new place.
I told them today. Shit hit the fucking fan. My bro was livid and his gf went psycho hysterical. I knew it would be a hard conversation but it went worse than I could’ve imagined. I feel like a massive asshole for asking them to leave in the middle of their semester, but I need to stand up for my partner who’s been miserable in this home for months. If our roommates were randos, I wouldn’t care so much. But it’s my own brother who I have a great relationship with.
I hope I didn’t fuck up my relationship with my brother. They’re staying with his gf’s parents tonight. Shit sucks a lot. There was no good way out of this situation.
TLDR: asked my little bro to move out and he’s extremely pissed at me
Update on this situation:
Lil bro and his gf just got approved for an apartment in town. They're moving out this weekend. Neither of them have spoken to me or texted me since Sunday. I really hurt my brother. I stand by my decision but I still feel like shit for fucking him over.
To make things worse, my brother got let go from his job today. Last summer, I got him an internship at the company I work for. He's genuinely been doing a really good job and has been a critical part of his team. Today, the company decided to shutter that part of the business because it hasn't been profitable enough. Two full-time engineers were fired, a few more were relocated to different departments, and my poor brother gets axed because he's just an intern.
Fuck man, the same week that I ask him to move out, he gets fired out of nowhere. I've tried so hard to support him over the years with an affordable room for college and an internship to jumpstart his career. We had a really good relationship. And in one week, all of that implodes. Fucking sucks. The firing isn't my fault, but it makes me feel even guiltier for telling him to move out. I can't imagine what he's going through right now.
