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What sets off your gaper alarm?

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backseat.bandit
Posts: 142 - Karma: 787
Mine would have to be when you are watching a pro edit and someone says "I could probably do that if I tried".
Mar 28 2014 2:50AM
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STwoops
Posts: 2941 - Karma: 5,126
gabe...lost it...way to many gabers. btw wtf is gaper alarm? is it a loud obnoxious sound ringing in our ears from too much wutang played at high volume? or is it just the sound of your own skis stomping shitty 10 foot drops? this is very important to me
Mar 31 2014 11:23PM
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
I pretty much only fall on powder days. does that make me a gaper?

Gaper alarm-

when people use a trail rating to describe their level of skiing eg. i normally ski blacks and double blacks.

When people ask why i have 3 pairs of skis, or comment on the length or waist.

When someone doesnt know where kirkwood is.

When someone says they would never drive 7+ hours in a day to go skiing.

when someone says they hate moguls

when some one says the groomer is icy...when it is just hardpack

when someone asks why my pants are all sliced up around the ankles

when someone brings their skis in a ski bag that they then load INTO a car.

When someone is anal about being gentle with their skis

When someone wears layers on a 35 degree day like i wear layers for a 0 degree day

when someone worries about scratching their bases because it will slow them down.

When the thought of bringing a lunch instead of buying it and eating it in the lodge doesnt occur to someone.

Someone who takes hot chocolate/coffee/bar breaks in the lodge.

Someone who takes a warmup run on a blue or green lift

Someone who falls on a surface lift (like me on a t-bar yesterday)

Someone who doesnt have outerwear that is at a minimum 10k rated

Someone who wears a camelbak(extremely useful, i just have never seen anyone but a gaper wear one)

Lastly, some one who gets a season pass and then talks about trying to ski enough days for it to be worth it.




Mar 31 2014 11:54PM
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backseat.bandit
Posts: 142 - Karma: 787
Oh yeah forgot about this one.

You only need to ski ~15 days to get your moneys worth at most mountains.
Apr 1 2014 4:39AM
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
uhhh try 4-5 days? I thought East coast areas were expensive as shit too?

$400-$500 season pass = 4 or 5 $120 day tickets.
Apr 1 2014 7:55PM
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crab_pretzel
Posts: 3919 - Karma: 622
near me the day tickets aren't anywhere near that, but still youre right it really doesn't take much
Apr 1 2014 8:12PM
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GANGBANG420
Posts: 263 - Karma: 879
Pant legs inside of boots.
Apr 2 2014 2:02PM
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vlad_poots
Posts: 7 - Karma: 9
gopro on head
EXCEPTIONS: sick pow lines, course previews, when you actually do tricks wearing it
typically though gopro= https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pWuIS4abejo
Apr 2 2014 6:12PM
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HuckNorris44
Posts: 1025 - Karma: 2,393
And in your profile you list K2 Extremes as one of your skis.
Apr 2 2014 10:32PM
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Nacho+
Posts: 3748 - Karma: 7,791
Even loon isn't that expensive. Bigger east coast resorts can cost upwards of $1000 for a pass. Tickets at those places are usually around $80-$90. My pass costs $500 and tickets are $60 so it's definitely more like 10+ days to work it off.
Apr 2 2014 10:47PM
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
no shit? i thought places like killington and stowe etc had ticket prices like vail resorts? I knew the season pass prices were as or more expensive so i just assumed...

looks like i made an ass out of me...u were spared.
Apr 2 2014 10:59PM
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steezburgereddie
Posts: 1059 - Karma: 1,945
I went up a lift with a guy that was wearing a headband and had his pants tucked into his boots.
Apr 2 2014 11:09PM
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
Oh, and anyone who still thinks the skier-snowboarder beef is still alive.

Anyone who says they cant ski "the powder"

anyone who has to put chains on their car to get somewhere with snow on the ground

anyone who doesnt carry their skis the "proper way" ie nose in front, toe piece behind your trap

anyone who has poles in pristine condition

anyone who wears the same thing everytime skiing regardless of temperature or weather.

Anyone who gets their weather from thier iphone weather

anyone who doesnt know atleast 1 shortcut to a ski area

Anyone who doesnt know what that booming is the morning of a powder day.

Anyone who gives ski patrollers a hard time...ever. i have zero tolerance for that shit.

Anyone who gets pissed when i brush them when passing on a traverse. "high side" or "low side" means someone is coming through...deal with with.

anyone who stops in a traverse

anyone who complains about having to hike...at all.

anyone who calls of piste, Backcountry

anyone who calls off piste, Powder


Apr 2 2014 11:31PM
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S.J.W
Posts: 7609 - Karma: 31,186
There are so many things wrong with your post.

1) there still is beef between skiing and snowboarding...

2) Skiing powder requires practice therefore some people wouldn't be able to ski it, especially if you live in a poor snowfall resort.

3)Yes, putting chains on your 2wd makes you a gaper...

4)there is no proper way of carrying skis...

5)what if you broke poles?

6)some people don't have enough money to afford a hoodie, insulated pants or shell pants...

7)What if there is only one road to the resort?

8) Some resorts don't do Av control

9)this is a fair point, but some ski patrol are douches

10)different areas have different sayings for cat tracks

11)this is fair point

12)some people are lazy and don't want to hike.

13)fair point

14)fair point
Apr 3 2014 2:30AM
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El_Barto.
Posts: 11661 - Karma: 24,340
^there most definitelt is a correct way to carry skis. Youre a gaper
Apr 3 2014 8:48AM
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90053
Posts: 2565 - Karma: 3,728
wut
Apr 3 2014 2:16PM
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quixotic
Posts: 6937 - Karma: 2,978
assuming you are talking about his point of high side or low side...

cat tracks and traverses aren't the same thing. a traverse is a ski/snowboard track that runs horizontal across the mountain to get to a different area, created by a lot of people all traveling in the same spot to that different area. a cat track is a track on the mountain created by a cat that is the width of the cat and groomed, also usually horizontal.

when you say high side you are passing someone on the higher side of the terrain than they are on, low side would be passing on the lower side of the terrain.
Apr 3 2014 2:43PM
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RubberSoul
Posts: 11249 - Karma: 14,642
everyone's a gaper to me so my alarm just goes off continually. once it stopped for a second when tom passed me in the park, but then he speed checked a jump and the alarm started going off again. actually sort of annoying
Apr 3 2014 3:02PM
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
sounds like youre a gaper.

1. no there isnt. Yet you think so. youre a gaper
2. If you cant ski it you are new to skiing and/or are not adventerous enough to have gone seeking it out... and most likely a gaper.
3. if you dont own a 4WD or dont know how to get around in shit conditions with 2wd, yes, you are a gaper.
4. thats why i put "proper" in quotes. However, im guessing you carry your skis the park-rat way. if i saw you doing that on a hike or from the lodge, you would stick out as a gaper to me.
5. if you broke poles you go and find the cheapest possible poles aka rentals, or hand-me-downs. Gapers spend lots of money on shit that doesnt matter...like poles and lodge food.
6. Any skier who isnt a gaper can tell you that having 1 set of outerwear that will wihstand shit conditions is super-duper important. I look tremndous in my outerwear, all rated 20k+, and jacket and pants combined cost me $150. Sounds like youre a gaper...who likes to wear cotton.
7. Thats why i said to "a" resort. the fact you have only ever been to 1 resort means youre a gaper.
8. if you dont know what it is, or cant put 2 and 2 together you dont know really anything about skiing. you must be a gaper.
9. I never said hospitality or mountain staff. I just said Patrol. you think some patrol are douches. You must be a gaper.
10. I said traverse...not cat track. you must be a gaper.
11. You are correct.
12. Lazy people is another term for someone who doesnt fucking love powder...aka someone who doesnt know how to ski it...see gaper characteristic #2. sounds like you must be a gaper.
13. correct.
14. correct.


And FYI your reading comprehension needs some work, bubs. this is a thread entitled "what sets off your gaper alarm". Not "what consititutes a gaper".


Oh, and if you didnt catch it before, YOU are setting off my gaper alarm. I would give you a wide berth on cat tracks and in liftlines.
Apr 3 2014 7:37PM
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skier58284
Posts: 1705 - Karma: 5,366
Skiing pow makes you a gaper. Real skiers ski 70 degree slopes all day every day, and that's too steep to hold pow.
Apr 3 2014 7:48PM
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S.J.W
Posts: 7609 - Karma: 31,186
If you think i'm a gaper from my point of views then i really don't care. Why should someone who only skis once or twice a year be discriminated against on the mountain. Yes they are pretty much always stupid but knowledge comes with time on the mountain. Chances are if you went to go learn a sport you've never done before, I.E surfing, you would suck and not know the rules so why should it be any different in skiing?
Apr 4 2014 7:32AM
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tomPietrowski
Posts: 7160 - Karma: 17,589
Exactly most of this thread has just been things tourists do. And who can blame then maybe they ski once a year they won't know everything. But that does not make them gapers. Quite a few tourist skiers could shame ns skiers out on the mountain.

So why not instead of trying to call others out for not knowing every little thing, you go out and actually ski.
Apr 4 2014 8:02AM
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RubberSoul
Posts: 11249 - Karma: 14,642
this is how we should insult each other politely on NS

but for rills, a couple people have said things in here that show that they think "gaper" is necessarily a bad thing, and it isnt at all

i love gapers, theyre stoked, theyre generally good natured.. hell, ive only skied with gaper friends this year. they get hammered with me, refuse to take anything seriously at all, and peer pressure me into doing rad shit while they have a ball airing 2 feet over beginner jumps. it's great
Apr 4 2014 10:21AM
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Rusticles
Posts: 2180 - Karma: 1,337
Fuck I love skiing with these guys.

Apr 4 2014 4:21PM
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robotdna
Posts: 1232 - Karma: 2,959
Fuck you too bro. You nothing of racing.

I really was rooting for you with that chute video, but this ruined it all. Skiing is skiing, have fun doing it. Jesus.
Apr 4 2014 8:17PM
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APunx176
Posts: 1189 - Karma: 2,628
People who roll over the lips of the jumps and/or sit in the landing of a jump. 95% of the people who go through our park just roll over all the jumps and it's annoying
Apr 4 2014 8:26PM
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robotdna
Posts: 1232 - Karma: 2,959
Here it is. Stoked on life. I love that.
Apr 4 2014 8:29PM
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s-hand
Posts: 1334 - Karma: 1,800
It appears that you are using this post just to rag on park skiers, which is not cool.  Just because you have experience skiing THE BACKCOUNTRY and THE POWDER does not make you any better skier than me or any other park skier who doesn't ride off piste.  I (and many many others on this site) just happen to have grown up in Pennsylvania at a hill that has a vertical of 600 ft and makes 99.9% of their snow, so I ski park.  Just because many of us have not been fortunate enough to live by a "real" mountain (or at least afford to travel to one on a fairly regular basis) does not make us inferior skiers.
Apr 7 2014 8:46PM
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skier58284
Posts: 1705 - Karma: 5,366
B-but I was a gate basher for a few years.
Apr 7 2014 8:54PM
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
when and where did i mention park or any derivation thereof? Hell, one the things that tends to calm my gaper alrm is tiny poles haha. Also, who ever said being a gaper is a bad thing? They are just begineers and are out there having fun like the rest of us. I could make a list of "what sets off your core ski bum alarm", and i bet you could find a reason to get but hurt about that also.


Im sorry, but if you call going off trail "backcountry", well, you might be a gaper.


this has nothing to do with what kind of terrain you ski, or where you ski it, but it sounds like you might be a...
Apr 7 2014 9:59PM
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s-hand
Posts: 1334 - Karma: 1,800
*sigh* nevermind...
Apr 7 2014 10:05PM
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robotdna
Posts: 1232 - Karma: 2,959
Were you now? Really?
Apr 7 2014 10:12PM
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
but seriously, why did you interpret that post to be bashing park skiers?

I never mentioned the gaperish stuff that happens in the park because im rarely in there nowdays so its not at the forefront of my mind. Is that why you thought i was bashing park skiers, because i left out park gapers?
Apr 7 2014 10:23PM
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skier58284
Posts: 1705 - Karma: 5,366
Yes, for three years. I lived in Minnesota and there wasn't really anything else to do. I only do big mountain now. I moved to Utah.
Apr 7 2014 10:49PM
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macavity
Posts: 264 - Karma: 493
I did the switch once but I fell
Apr 8 2014 1:10AM
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ihitchadsgap
Posts: 472 - Karma: 55
when someone tells me how good they are but what runs they can do....
Apr 8 2014 2:19AM
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MLJ
Posts: 1849 - Karma: 3,649
Haha, people get trolled way too easily on this site.

Also your sig
Apr 8 2014 8:43AM
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speedin
Posts: 731 - Karma: 131
Tele skiers skiing in jeans tucked into boots with a go pro. Saw some dude in line a few weeks ago like that at beaver creek in the lift line. Actually started laughing to my self
Apr 9 2014 12:39AM
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crab_pretzel
Posts: 3919 - Karma: 622
vlad_pootsgopro on head EXCEPTIONS: sick pow lines, course previews, when you actually do tricks wearing it
typically though gopro= https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pWuIS4abejo


the funniest part about that vid is the description haha
Jun 10 2014 12:28AM
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profa_212
Posts: 8949 - Karma: 36,479
speedinTele skiers skiing in jeans tucked into boots with a go pro. Saw some dude in line a few weeks ago like that at beaver creek in the lift line. Actually started laughing to my self


Probably a gaper day.....idk you don't see many gapers on tele because it's so hard and usually done after mastering normal skiing.
Jun 10 2014 12:42AM
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pj21
Posts: 400 - Karma: 4,635
Sh4dowPark skis. Anything narrower than 98mm. Non-twin tips (with possible exceptions such as AT skis). Scott equipment of any type. 100% camber skis. Gaper gap. Snowboards.


Who the fuck do you think you are? What do you have against park skiing? In what way does scott equipment make you a clueless gaper? Fuck off.
Jun 10 2014 5:32AM
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Toaster-Tony
Posts: 3531 - Karma: 5,850
tusken_assraiderwut


You've clearly never skied the Midwest.
Jun 10 2014 1:13PM
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robotdna
Posts: 1232 - Karma: 2,959
Profahoben_212Probably a gaper day.....idk you don't see many gapers on tele because it's so hard and usually done after mastering normal skiing.


Lol @ day you tried that on your chets
Jun 10 2014 6:33PM
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