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October, 2024

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First Handjob

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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,484
I chuckled

Mar 15 2014 2:24PM
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Xanadoo
Posts: 729 - Karma: 1,237
reminds me of my first handy. except for mine there were a lot more cameras
Mar 15 2014 3:12PM
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feihlination
Posts: 8356 - Karma: 1,084
and a lot less women
Mar 15 2014 3:37PM
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Cambrewski
Posts: 320 - Karma: 3,136
The gay dudes......lol
Mar 15 2014 3:41PM
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ZachAndCheese
Posts: 816 - Karma: 5,116
thought this was a thread about me and OP's mom
Mar 15 2014 8:50PM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,484
No it's about me and your dad
Mar 15 2014 8:57PM
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-MK-
Posts: 3253 - Karma: 5,332
You have been trying to hard to fit in here, slow down there buddy
Mar 16 2014 4:10AM
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Finkle
Posts: 959 - Karma: 850
Respect your NS elders kid.
Mar 17 2014 12:30AM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,484
Thank you, I appreciate the feedback
Mar 17 2014 12:36AM
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El_Barto.
Posts: 11661 - Karma: 24,364
Dolan is just butthurt because hes not an EBI member
Mar 17 2014 12:37AM
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
I have never gotten a handjob in my life. I didnt have sex till college though, so maybe i missed out on that part of life?

I mean honestly, who would even offer a handjob? If you dont wanna fuck, blow me. if you dont wanna blow me, ill go beat off.
Mar 17 2014 12:40AM
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cornholio
Posts: 3952 - Karma: 3,057
dolan pls
Mar 17 2014 12:40AM
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Finkle
Posts: 959 - Karma: 850
I have thought the same thing, but nothings better than a good old fashioned.
Mar 17 2014 12:42AM
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Bart.Man
Posts: 1742 - Karma: 1,952
What the fuck did you just say to Hugo? Clearly you don't know this monster's history, or you'd watch your god damn mouth. He exists on a diet of fish heads and milk. Do you know what a diet like that does to a person? Gets em real pissed and unable to deal with little shits like you, that's what. I'd suggest you watch yourself.
Mar 17 2014 3:19AM
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Ballsdeepinmud
Posts: 41 - Karma: 636
You sound like a fucking bitch
Mar 17 2014 7:00AM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,484
Lol coming from the pussy that needed girl help from the internet
Mar 17 2014 8:54AM
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El_Barto.
Posts: 11661 - Karma: 24,364
this rebuttal is excellent. Balls deep is balls deep in his own asshole cause hes a queer
Mar 17 2014 8:59AM
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Mr.Sloth
Posts: 5091 - Karma: 13,469
I agree! This inappropriate and tasteless "humor" is disturbing and out of place on this website!

Please remove it!
Mr. Sloth
Mar 17 2014 11:25AM
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El_Barto.
Posts: 11661 - Karma: 24,364
Bart.ManWhat the fuck did you just say to Hugo? Clearly you don't know this monster's history, or you'd watch your god damn mouth. He exists on a diet of fish heads and milk. Do you know what a diet like that does to a person? Gets em real pissed and unable to deal with little shits like you, that's what. I'd suggest you watch yourself.


lol
May 12 2014 12:30AM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51630 - Karma: 162,108
californiagrownI have never gotten a handjob in my life. I didnt have sex till college though, so maybe i missed out on that part of life?

I mean honestly, who would even offer a handjob? If you dont wanna fuck, blow me. if you dont wanna blow me, ill go beat off.



Same
May 12 2014 12:40AM
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SlurmrnHurnyBurn
Posts: 315 - Karma: 765
i got to skip HJ I got BJ first. It was weird, cause it like wasn't what I expected i think. and then i wasn't sure if i liked it, and i thought i had to pee. but then i started thinking about what she may have eaten earlier today... and i never came.
May 12 2014 12:55AM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51630 - Karma: 162,108
BO_i got to skip HJ I got BJ first. It was weird, cause it like wasn't what I expected i think. and then i wasn't sure if i liked it, and i thought i had to pee. but then i started thinking about what she may have eaten earlier today... and i never came.


sure bro
May 12 2014 4:03AM
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RusselCrowe
Posts: 367 - Karma: 1,111
Is getting a handy as awkward as the video?
May 12 2014 6:45AM
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elinde
Posts: 1467 - Karma: 3,052
Why has nobody here gotten a handy? They are far more common than anything in the 7th-9th/20th grade range.
May 12 2014 7:32AM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,484
elindeWhy has nobody here gotten a handy? They are far more common than anything in the 7th-9th/20th grade range.


Because we can do them better to ourselves than any girls can. Handy is a waste of time and effort
May 12 2014 9:58AM
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Nacho+
Posts: 3748 - Karma: 7,791
EBI is killing everyone in this thread
May 12 2014 10:01AM
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~~~~~~~~
Posts: 2345 - Karma: 2,104
elindeWhy has nobody here gotten a handy? They are far more common than anything in the 7th-9th/20th grade range.


because we're all 12 on this website.
May 12 2014 10:07AM
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Barefootin_Fiend
Posts: 7618 - Karma: 4,727
.Hugo.Because we can do them better to ourselves than any girls can. Handy is a waste of time and effort


AMEN! I have no desire to ever receive another handy in my life. I can do it better myself.
May 12 2014 10:41AM
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Rusticles
Posts: 2180 - Karma: 1,337
BO_i got to skip HJ I got BJ first. It was weird, cause it like wasn't what I expected i think. and then i wasn't sure if i liked it, and i thought i had to pee. but then i started thinking about what she may have eaten earlier today... and i never came.


Haha, I was the same way, kept getting her to stop because I thought I was going to piss in her mouth. Then I just thought to myself, fuck it, it'll be hilarious if I piss in her mouth. Then it was all over and I realized I never pissed in her mouth.

Barefootin_FiendAMEN! I have no desire to ever receive another handy in my life. I can do it better myself.


Fuck it must have been a shitty handy. I fucking love handys. They're a nice change every once in a while.
May 12 2014 11:16AM
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PASKIINGSUCKS
Posts: 9097 - Karma: 777
They have a time and a place I suppose. Got a handy from my ex on a long roadtrip once..........She was driving. Now that's love fellas.
May 12 2014 1:24PM
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Barefootin_Fiend
Posts: 7618 - Karma: 4,727
RusticlesFuck it must have been a shitty handy. I fucking love handys. They're a nice change every once in a while.


yes, they're all shitty handies. it's not like i've only had one from only one girl either...many handies from many women and they all sucked.

the ONLY time it's good is if coupled with a bj. now the hj/bj combo....there's something we can talk about....
May 12 2014 1:30PM
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fupaface
Posts: 810 - Karma: 449
If rather get a blowjob that's 75% teeth, then a handjob. The excitement of having a girl touch your dick for the first time is far out weighed by the displeasure of having an inexperienced girl awkwardly pull on your cock like she's trying to uproot a tree.
May 12 2014 1:44PM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,484
RusticlesHaha, I was the same way, kept getting her to stop because I thought I was going to piss in her mouth. Then I just thought to myself, fuck it, it'll be hilarious if I piss in her mouth. Then it was all over and I realized I never pissed in her mouth.



Fuck it must have been a shitty handy. I fucking love handys. They're a nice change every once in a while.


http://bobacheldates.files.wordpress.com/2013/12/whats-wrong-with-you.gif
May 12 2014 2:13PM
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Rusticles
Posts: 2180 - Karma: 1,337
The referenced post has been removed.


haha,

It was first orgasm ever
May 12 2014 2:13PM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,484
.Hugo.http://bobacheldates.files.wordpress.com/2013/12/whats-wrong-with-you.gif


you fucking moron

May 12 2014 2:14PM
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Blindsurfer
Posts: 2252 - Karma: 2,791
handys are generally terrible but my girlfriend has gotten amazing at handys and can get me to like 9/10 every time now. im a great coach.
May 14 2014 9:39AM
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meatmuffin69
Posts: 17 - Karma: -43
californiagrownI have never gotten a handjob in my life. I didnt have sex till college though, so maybe i missed out on that part of life?

I mean honestly, who would even offer a handjob? If you dont wanna fuck, blow me. if you dont wanna blow me, ill go beat off

i can see why u were a virgin till college but ur probable jacked on one arm so i dont want beef
May 14 2014 10:51AM
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Mr.Huck
Posts: 6096 - Karma: 14,896
Hahahaha. "Choke up, choke up like softball".
May 14 2014 11:00AM
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HuckNorris44
Posts: 1025 - Karma: 2,393
Everybody loves a nice old fashion


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SQWiaZmNuw
May 14 2014 3:31PM
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freshpriceofns
Posts: 24 - Karma: 1
The referenced post has been removed.


post a pic of the chick
Sep 2 2014 12:46AM
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daannnnieel
Posts: 5163 - Karma: 4,293
californiagrownI have never gotten a handjob in my life. I didnt have sex till college though, so maybe i missed out on that part of life?

I mean honestly, who would even offer a handjob? If you dont wanna fuck, blow me. if you dont wanna blow me, ill go beat off.


you would rather fap than be fapped.


You're one lazy ass motherfucker.
Sep 2 2014 12:53AM
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freshpriceofns
Posts: 24 - Karma: 1
KayngBayngyou would rather fap than be fapped.


You're one lazy ass motherfucker.


id honesty rather whack off than waste my time talking to sum ho
Sep 2 2014 12:55AM
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TACO-DOG.exe
Posts: 11988 - Karma: 12,261
was watching a movie with the ex and her parents and her brother way back. me and ex were sitting on the couch furthest away from the tv with a blanket on top so nobody was really watching us. can't remember the events leading up to it but i popped a boner and she started giving me a handy right there, with her parents in the same damn room. she kept going for a solid 15 minutes and i finished in her mouth. her family never found out and i thought it was funny as fuck.
Sep 2 2014 1:21AM
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juicedrummer11
Posts: 1960 - Karma: 1,331
i thought this was gonna be tales of our fist hand job from a female. mine was pretty cool
Sep 2 2014 3:27AM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51630 - Karma: 162,108
Didn't remember this thread and came in to say the whole thing. Never had one, don't want one. That's what mouths are for.
Sep 2 2014 5:54AM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,484
KayngBayngyou would rather fap than be fapped.


You're one lazy ass motherfucker.


Im pretty sure doing it yourself would be less lazy..... being fapped requires no work for you at all
Sep 2 2014 8:03AM
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j.hutt
Posts: 11 - Karma: 25
Too bad you never got one lol
Jan 22 2015 9:29AM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,484
j.huttToo bad you never got one lol


No i havent, because theyre for nubes and middle schoolers, like you. Im a pro so i went straight to getting bjs.

Good effort trying to make fun of me in an older thread of mine, but you get a d- for execution. Still a better grade than your shitty blog would get though so congrats!?
Jan 22 2015 10:19AM
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Rusticles
Posts: 2180 - Karma: 1,337
californiagrownI have never gotten a handjob in my life. I didnt have sex till college though, so maybe i missed out on that part of life?

I mean honestly, who would even offer a handjob? If you dont wanna fuck, blow me. if you dont wanna blow me, ill go beat off.


Hand jobs are actually a nice change sometimes, especially once you get older and are looking at trying something new.

BO_i got to skip HJ I got BJ first. It was weird, cause it like wasn't what I expected i think. and then i wasn't sure if i liked it, and i thought i had to pee. but then i started thinking about what she may have eaten earlier today... and i never came.


I was exactly the same, never had an orgasm till I got my first BJ. Kept getting her to stop because I thought I was going to piss in her mouth. Finally I was like fuck it, it'll be a funny story and came in her mouth. she never said anything which I thought was weird. Must have been the most disgusting load as it had been building for years.

Got a handy from a girlfriend in the mall once, which carried over to the movie theater. took off my sock to clean up the mess and threw it on the floor. girlfriend tried to keep it and put it in her purse to wash. Had to tell her to leave it there.
Jan 22 2015 11:26AM
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SFB
Posts: 8895 - Karma: 26,352
j.huttToo bad you never got one lol

lol you just got slam dunked kid
Jan 22 2015 11:50AM
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