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je_t.aime_canard
January, 2025

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Ski area one liners

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roddy116
Posts: 10648 - Karma: 7,665
Deer valley- we will tickle you with a feather just ask.
Big sky- you might actually die here.
Telluride- you can't drive here.
Hyland- quarantining douchebags so you can have fun in other places.
Mar 12 2014 7:38PM
1050 62
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kryan233
Posts: 149 - Karma: 266
mountain creek- "if you liked our setup opening weekend, you'll love it our closing weekend, cus its probably exactly the same!"

Mar 14 2014 5:03PM
4 0
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cbk355
Posts: 27 - Karma: 23
Camelback, PA- Asian Invasion
Mar 14 2014 5:14PM
2 0
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Jro.
Posts: 628 - Karma: 655
Sugarloaf: SETH WESCOTT!!!!1!
Mar 14 2014 5:27PM
2 0
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CaptainObvious.
Posts: 5712 - Karma: 20,639
Diamond Peak: If you're over 10 or under 60, you won't fit in here.

Homewood: Come be exceptionally surprised. Tell no one.

Heavenly: Cause it's cheaper than a trip to Vegas and a trip to Vail.
Mar 14 2014 5:35PM
3 0
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GayWolf420
Posts: 37817 - Karma: 125,775
holy fucking shit, this is so spot on, i cant even handle it.

Deer valley - worlds best groomers, but have fun dodging gapers.


Mar 14 2014 5:48PM
1 0
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roddy116
Posts: 10648 - Karma: 7,665
Buck hill- come get your photo taken by Japanese people
Mar 14 2014 6:08PM
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GANDALF
Posts: 6306 - Karma: 6,657
Mount Baker - Seriously don't come here or you will get murdered by the notorious Mount Baker Slasher.
Mar 14 2014 6:47PM
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Panda_with_Guns
Posts: 3040 - Karma: 1,620
Winter Park- Because fuck summit county
Loveland- For the poorer gapers and old men.

Mar 14 2014 7:16PM
2 0
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APunx176
Posts: 1189 - Karma: 2,628
Coffee Mill - It's fun if it's your first time skiing
Bear Mountain - Sunday in The Park
Mar 14 2014 7:28PM
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frickindarn
Posts: 2545 - Karma: 11,371
A-Basin "Because you can't afford Breck or Keystone."
Mar 14 2014 7:52PM
1 0
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ModMommy
Posts: 10845 - Karma: 57,762
Alpine Valley- we don't have the squaw assholes.
Mar 14 2014 8:19PM
1 0
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j.var
Posts: 591 - Karma: 228
Mt High- Snow?
Mar 14 2014 8:39PM
1 0
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liamwastaken
Posts: 136 - Karma: 51
stevens pass-you just heard of us last year
Mar 14 2014 8:57PM
3 0
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reedhall12321
Posts: 19 - Karma: 22
Mt hood meadows: Our parks aren't bad, they're just family friendly!!
Mar 14 2014 9:07PM
2 0
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theabortionator
Posts: 52146 - Karma: 168,473
Gore - Downhill skiing uphill
Mar 14 2014 9:12PM
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DManley
Posts: 463 - Karma: 1,626
Bear Mountain- What is skiing?

Mar 14 2014 9:22PM
4 0
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Jakx~
Posts: 653 - Karma: 503
Mt Bachelor: Windlips, yep they're gonna kill you.
Mar 14 2014 10:09PM
1 0
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mkski31
Posts: 129 - Karma: 576
Black Mountain Of Maine - what park?
Mar 14 2014 10:51PM
0 0
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Mr.LemonPie
Posts: 4100 - Karma: 1,625
A-Basin-the only good terrain in Summit County
Mar 15 2014 1:13AM
2 0
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GANGBANG420
Posts: 263 - Karma: 879
Are- we guarantee you aren't saying our name right.
Mar 15 2014 2:42AM
6 0
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Andi_G
Posts: 3088 - Karma: 15,125
and rich 70 year olds
Mar 15 2014 2:58AM
1 0
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Dick*Bandit
Posts: 858 - Karma: 492
yup….. fact.
Mar 15 2014 5:29PM
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tgm
Posts: 278 - Karma: 325
This applies to Cannon too
Mar 15 2014 5:55PM
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ThaLorax
Posts: 21097 - Karma: 8,526
Squaw Meadows- We don't have the dyslexics from Alpine Valley
Mar 16 2014 3:33AM
3 0
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louie.mirags
Posts: 6015 - Karma: 5,027
Not this year... almost nothing the same this past week as 2 months ago
Mar 16 2014 6:18AM
0 0
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montanan
Posts: 1787 - Karma: 1,346
montana snowbowl : the whole point of p-tex
Mar 16 2014 10:20AM
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John18_6
Posts: 7313 - Karma: 49,168
Our landings are flatter than a Filipino hooker!

Click for larger image
Click for larger image

oh yeah and quoting myself because I'm just that awesome
Mar 17 2014 12:45AM
3 0
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El_Barto.
Posts: 11661 - Karma: 24,356
My Bachelor: probably the best big tree skiing you'll ever find.
Mar 17 2014 1:30AM
1 0
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bighomieflock
Posts: 2040 - Karma: 2,445
Snowbird: I will throw you out of the tram if it means a slight increase in my chances of powder
late season A-basin: I've decided to stop bringing my skis so I have more room in the trunk to pack beer for the beach
Mar 17 2014 1:43AM
0 0
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The_Polock
Posts: 345 - Karma: 1,280
Bittersweet - Kalamazoo really exist and yes we ski on a pile of trash.
Mar 17 2014 11:45AM
1 0
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BenWest
Posts: 470 - Karma: 89
Whitewater - worst skiing in the kootenay's, our snow sucks and our locals are unfriendly, stay away.
Mar 17 2014 4:03PM
0 0
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tyler.minyay.9
Posts: 53 - Karma: 101
got one for Rabbit Hill?


Rabbit Hill: I guess this will do...
Mar 17 2014 8:43PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 52146 - Karma: 168,473
Do people actually hit that thing? My knees and heels would be like noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Mar 17 2014 8:57PM
1 0
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blazeonyia
Posts: 357 - Karma: 1,406
Vail:  Cat tracks and blow

Beaver Creek:  Free cookies cuz fuck poor people!
Mar 17 2014 9:59PM
3 0
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L3NNY
Posts: 63 - Karma: 881
Big Bear - love crud, slush and gapers - love bear mtn.
Mar 17 2014 11:07PM
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John18_6
Posts: 7313 - Karma: 49,168
I speed checked it and scoped it, realized that no matter how big i go it would feel the same, then retreated away from the park so as to never see that wretched construction of snow ever again.
Mar 17 2014 11:59PM
2 0
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John18_6
Posts: 7313 - Karma: 49,168
I didn't hit any of their jumps and I've never seen anybody hit a jump there, nobody at that place skis park anymore. It used to be decent but it went down the drain. also sorry for dub post... I forgot these details...
Mar 18 2014 12:13AM
2 0
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array.
Posts: 2439 - Karma: 202
Snoqualmie- Snowcrummy

Mar 18 2014 12:50AM
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extravert
Posts: 1113 - Karma: 3,198
Wintegreen-what more needs to be said
Mar 18 2014 1:20AM
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Skibumsmith
Posts: 5441 - Karma: 11,944
Alta - another long traverse ahead
Deer Valley - Hey everybody! Look how much money I have!
Mar 18 2014 2:38AM
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roddy116
Posts: 10648 - Karma: 7,665
Big sky- lone mountain gives me a boyner
Apr 4 2014 4:37AM
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perryhunter
Posts: 721 - Karma: -185
Utah -  the best and awesome Ski resort and services. Specially Alta, and Odgen, terrific!
British Columbia -  has spectacular ski resorts and affordable hotels and rooms.
Apr 4 2014 5:19AM
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Nashoba_Parks
Posts: 120 - Karma: 507

yes you can backflip.

Nashoba Valley Terrain Parks - "Huck You"

Apr 4 2014 7:38AM
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ski4fun420
Posts: 902 - Karma: 842
Mammoth(regarding woman) - Fat, ugly or mean move to Mammoth be a queen.
Apr 4 2014 10:14AM
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roddy116
Posts: 10648 - Karma: 7,665
Yellowstone club- too rich to be assholes.
Apr 4 2014 12:47PM
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