Member of the Month

KilaTsunami
October, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

Fine Wines for Real Men

profile picture
LiquorLanch
Posts: 1909 - Karma: 1,046
What do you enjoy? I'm currently enjoying a wonderful cabernet sauvignon this night
Feb 13 2014 11:27PM
109 26
profile picture
Jeebus.
Posts: 4904 - Karma: 5,822
Three penis wine.
Feb 13 2014 11:35PM
6 3
profile picture
statuswhitegirl
Posts: 4058 - Karma: 883
I only drink wine if its bagged in a box #YOLOSWAG420710
Feb 13 2014 11:37PM
1 3
profile picture
whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,103
grape drank
Feb 13 2014 11:39PM
1 3
profile picture
cool_name
Posts: 4295 - Karma: 3,131
are we meant to be impressed that you are drinking wine, because i can see your smug smile as you typed Cabernet Sauvignon through my computer screen.

Im also willing to bet your "fine wine" is some 10 dollar bottle you got at the supermarket as well because if it was any good you would of named the actual wine not the grape variety. Honestly make it more obvious this is the first bottle of wine you have ever bought.

inb4 you reply to my post claiming it was actually some super expensive wine and give me the name of some random bottle you looked up online.
Feb 14 2014 2:40AM
20 1
profile picture
7-11_Slurpee
Posts: 1142 - Karma: 1,552
I like the keep it high class too dude
Click for larger image
Feb 14 2014 8:53AM
0 0
profile picture
Barefootin_Fiend
Posts: 7618 - Karma: 4,727
ha, never heard it called that. we always just called it slap the bag.
Feb 14 2014 9:19AM
0 0
profile picture
.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
Hahaha fucking destroyed
Feb 14 2014 9:22AM
8 0
profile picture
shorty_T
Posts: 2725 - Karma: 761
I went wine shopping at bevmo yesterday and walked out with a bottle of Mangria for my valentine and the makings of Irish car bombs then went and bought a $5 bottle of wine on the way home. Bevmo is the place to go for over priced wine and judgemental people. They will give you sophisticated wine conversation, ns will not.
Feb 14 2014 9:24AM
0 0
profile picture
yelsel
Posts: 12967 - Karma: 3,451
so great
Feb 14 2014 10:16AM
0 0
profile picture
mehregan15
Posts: 780 - Karma: 753
all butt hurt he cant afford a nice bottle... some of us actually enjoy nice wine. I've never been into whites but anything red is my shit. Tried out this Mountains Proprietary blend from Aonair last night and it was pretty good, just a little too sweet.

Click for larger image

I have some Joseph Phelps bottles that I am saving for something special. Who knows what. This stuff is the shit though.

Click for larger image

Click for larger image
Feb 14 2014 10:24AM
2 1
profile picture
TACO-DOG.exe
Posts: 11988 - Karma: 12,261
#rekt
Feb 14 2014 10:31AM
0 0
profile picture
.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
How the fuck did you manage to make that assessment based on what he posted? Please step out of your parents' kitchen and take a seat in the corner.
Feb 14 2014 10:56AM
4 1
profile picture
CaptainObvious.
Posts: 5712 - Karma: 20,638
Your post gave me wood.
Feb 14 2014 11:02AM
0 0
profile picture
mehregan15
Posts: 780 - Karma: 753
def not my parents kitchen. see all those armada's in the background? unfortunately my parents do not shred that hard.

nice try though.
Feb 14 2014 12:00PM
1 1
profile picture
Ski_the_east01
Posts: 5203 - Karma: 2,306
Your parents seem awfully nice to let you keep your sticks in their kitchen
Feb 14 2014 12:04PM
2 0
profile picture
SFB
Posts: 8895 - Karma: 26,352
lol
Feb 14 2014 12:12PM
0 0
profile picture
Miomo
Posts: 4302 - Karma: 14,133
I be surprised if you did, too.
Feb 14 2014 12:12PM
1 0
profile picture
mehregan15
Posts: 780 - Karma: 753
your mom was awfully nice to let me keep my stick in her asshole last night.
Feb 14 2014 12:13PM
2 2
profile picture
.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
You expect me to believe that, as an adult male, you keep a high school prom photo on your kitchen counter?
Feb 14 2014 12:20PM
6 0
profile picture
TomWallnuss
Posts: 115 - Karma: 417
F*ckin Lord this thread is the reason I´ll never start drinking wine because I rarely see (young) people enjoying wine for the taste just a bunch of pathetic college kids who see some kind of mystery potion in wine that´ll make them come of as highclass mature business men it´s fucking obnoxious

Of course there´s the exception of people who don´t like beer but still like to drink so they choose wine but they don´t make a fuckin thread about "cabernet sauvignon" (nice wine OP tell me your favorite year)

tl;dr: OP´s a bitch, perfect example of people who pick up wine for status
Feb 14 2014 12:23PM
1 1
profile picture
mehregan15
Posts: 780 - Karma: 753
family photo from my best friends wedding.

Click for larger image

Any other questions? Please, keep them coming!
Feb 14 2014 12:24PM
0 0
profile picture
Randy_Quench
Posts: 5447 - Karma: 4,343
this thread is so much better than anticipated. bravo chaps
Feb 14 2014 12:26PM
0 0
profile picture
SFB
Posts: 8895 - Karma: 26,352
is that your gf? because shes fat.
Feb 14 2014 12:26PM
5 0
profile picture
.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
Why is your sister wearing pants at a wedding?
Feb 14 2014 12:27PM
0 0
profile picture
mehregan15
Posts: 780 - Karma: 753
mom, sister, and then brothers fiance.

ill pass those kind words along.
Feb 14 2014 12:27PM
0 0
profile picture
SFB
Posts: 8895 - Karma: 26,352
do it
you wont.
Feb 14 2014 12:28PM
0 0
profile picture
Ski_the_east01
Posts: 5203 - Karma: 2,306
Click for larger image
Feb 14 2014 12:28PM
12 0
profile picture
.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
Wasn't gonna go there, but yeah...I'd definitely take the mom over either of the sisters. Looks like they definitely got dad's genes.
Feb 14 2014 12:28PM
0 0
profile picture
CaptainObvious.
Posts: 5712 - Karma: 20,638
Can you record it?

"Hey mom. Hey sis. I put your pictures online to prove a point and some kid named "jabbathehut" said you're fat."
Feb 14 2014 12:29PM
4 0
profile picture
.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
Hahahaha holy fuck.
Feb 14 2014 12:29PM
1 0
profile picture
mehregan15
Posts: 780 - Karma: 753
only one is a sister, and claiming you would take my mom out of the 3 is more of a compliment then anything, since I definitely got my genes from her.

so the real question is, would you fuck me too?
Feb 14 2014 12:31PM
0 0
profile picture
Randy_Quench
Posts: 5447 - Karma: 4,343
hahahaha, well worth the time and effort
Feb 14 2014 12:31PM
2 0
profile picture
timmi
Posts: 12874 - Karma: 3,460
This thread his hilarious. And wine snobs are hilarious. I sell Stirling and a few other Diageo brands for work and I love when I get to deal with wine snobs. I just see how much ridiculous stuff I can get them to agree with.
"Ah yes, this is a very layered red with a hint of tree bark and pre-ripe blueberry"
"Ah yes I get a very distinct barky-pre-ripe blueberry!"
And then they buy it. Because they're stupid.
Feb 14 2014 12:31PM
2 0
profile picture
mehregan15
Posts: 780 - Karma: 753
its called sales.

same thing happens in a ski shop everyday.

"ah yes, these will ski every condition on the mountain!"
"ah yes, these will float better then any other ski because of our blah blah blah technology"

and then they buy, because they dont know any better.
Feb 14 2014 12:33PM
1 1
profile picture
SFB
Posts: 8895 - Karma: 26,352
did you tell your family that they are fat yet?
Feb 14 2014 1:48PM
1 0
profile picture
mehregan15
Posts: 780 - Karma: 753
I have not. My parents are in Hawaii, sister lives in Denver, and my brothers fiance is in Michigan. Maybe I can get a group skype sesh going later and you guys can join as well.

I'll be sure to keep you updated.
Feb 14 2014 1:50PM
0 1
profile picture
Peter.
Posts: 23796 - Karma: 13,014
hawaii? hope shes not wearing a bikini
Feb 14 2014 1:56PM
2 0
profile picture
mehregan15
Posts: 780 - Karma: 753
she definitely is, are you worried you might pop a boner thinking about it in your 11th grade calculus class?
Feb 14 2014 2:02PM
1 0
profile picture
SFB
Posts: 8895 - Karma: 26,352
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Feb 14 2014 2:03PM
2 0
profile picture
LiquorLanch
Posts: 1909 - Karma: 1,046
No, yes, and no. It was a free bottle of some no name shit you dingus.  Tasted decent for what it was. And you seem like one of those dicks who gets all butthurt when people dont drink an IPA or goofy microbrew
Feb 14 2014 2:04PM
2 0
profile picture
ged.bend
Posts: 156 - Karma: 1,483
you are obviously very into wines, i can tell by your dialect that you know what you are talking about.
Feb 14 2014 2:42PM
1 0
profile picture
chicken
Posts: 6843 - Karma: 2,123
buying fine wine to look like a real man is the stupidest shit ever. A $20 bottle of wine is going to taste almost as good, and get you and your date just as drunk. If you have like 60+ to spend on a bottle of wine then by all means do it, but you aren't going to impresse the girl any more than if you bring a cheaper bottle. Unless they know a lot about wine.

If you really care, just get one that has a year printed on it and that's good enough for 99% of the time.
Feb 14 2014 4:50PM
0 0
profile picture
123+ski
Posts: 2832 - Karma: 581
Holy shit this is great
Feb 14 2014 5:32PM
0 0
profile picture
b-kul
Posts: 4350 - Karma: 1,111
epic win
Feb 14 2014 9:05PM
0 0
profile picture
Jeebus.
Posts: 4904 - Karma: 5,822
holy shit way too epic hahahha
Feb 14 2014 9:08PM
0 0
profile picture
Dr.Dealgood
Posts: 2587 - Karma: 1,352
Fucking lol'ed all the way to bottom of this thread.

Hah, I imagine the only person that drinks nice wine around here and understands it is Lawrence.

Feb 14 2014 9:50PM
0 0
profile picture
Mr.Bishop
Posts: 22708 - Karma: 76,635
Cupcake Cabernet. Not crazy fancy, but tasty as fuck.

Click for larger image

For those hating on wine, fuck that dude. Nothing gets a chick naked like a man that appreciates a good bottle of wine.

Kill 'em with class.
Feb 14 2014 10:33PM
0 0
profile picture
Jeebus.
Posts: 4904 - Karma: 5,822
Having a large schlong has the same effect
Feb 14 2014 10:37PM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-5)