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How to get pardoned from a diploma?/ the how or how not to get out of stuff thread

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Gsince93
Posts: 203 - Karma: 286
So in my province in grade 12 we have to write standardized test that count for 50% of our total mark in that subject. I have been trying to think of good ways to get pardoned from the tests but my usual problem in my plans is I get thrown in jail or die of injuries. I was thinking if I could get a concussion and a doctors note I would be pardoned because last year one grade twelve got hit in the head by a baseball bat and he got out of the tests.... So maybe I'll just tuck for the double this week end and pray I get concussed , but there is a pretty big chance I'll just break my neck or not get get hurt enough and still have to write the tests. That option seems both risky and flawed so I thought there must be a fool proof way and if there is one new schoolers seems like a place that would know. And of course I could always just study and write them but I thought this would be something worth exploring. Any ideas will be appreciated and feel free to share stories of how you or people you know of successfully or unsuccessfully got out of a test or anything important because at the least I see this thread being entertaining if not educational. Ps one other idea I had was paying someone to kidnap me but that can't end well for the other person.... There has to be a way that is more simple and also believable to the school
Jan 8 2014 9:14PM
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Spinoza
Posts: 12763 - Karma: 3,846
troll
Jan 8 2014 9:15PM
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arnie_grape
Posts: 3451 - Karma: 11,683
lies
Jan 8 2014 9:17PM
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GayWolf420
Posts: 37397 - Karma: 120,258
gr8 b8 m8. will r8 8/8
Jan 8 2014 9:18PM
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stickski
Posts: 1938 - Karma: 1,529
Just drop out and move to colorado bruh
Jan 8 2014 9:19PM
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cool_name
Posts: 4295 - Karma: 3,131
bomb threat
Jan 8 2014 9:20PM
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TechnoPotamus
Posts: 11626 - Karma: 3,522
OP i have a plan for you m8y, me and Deebie decided we're gonna give 'er the old eiffel tower. I hear the train is coming through right after that ayy
Jan 8 2014 9:20PM
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lineskier10
Posts: 11339 - Karma: 796
only solution is to seduce whoever has the ability to pardon you and hold it over their head, bonus points if its a dude
Jan 8 2014 9:21PM
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CaptainObvious.
Posts: 5712 - Karma: 20,638
Choo

Fucking

Choo
Jan 8 2014 9:21PM
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Merrrick
Posts: 529 - Karma: 717
Just try to jump a car like Kobe, if it goes bad, you'll get hurt, miss your test, and probably get paid. If it goes well, you'll fail your test, and go strait to the olympics for high jumping.
Jan 8 2014 9:23PM
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Gsince93
Posts: 203 - Karma: 286
Sadly not trolling
Click for larger image
Jan 8 2014 9:28PM
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Gsince93
Posts: 203 - Karma: 286
I was thinking something along these lines but the tests are strung over the next fourish weeks starting Tuesday and I don't have time to make a bomb...
^ jkjk
If I really sold my acting after the bomb threat maybe I could convince the school counselor I can't come back under sound mind but lets be honest I'm not Nicolas Cage so they'd probably see right through my acting. And then the police would eventually find out it was me...unless I pay a homeless person to call the school and make the threat in person, the problem still stands it would only lock down the school maximum a week.It seems like every idea is either too drastic or not quite enough, there has to a balance!!!
Jan 8 2014 9:38PM
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-WZ-
Posts: 3600 - Karma: 6,582
well you might kill yourself trying to give yourself a concussion so i would advise against it but its your life do what you want
Jan 8 2014 9:38PM
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dispatchQ_main
Posts: 2619 - Karma: 629
Just fake a concussion with a solid back story. The doctors basically take your word for it. I once faked one when I was in grade 8 because I was sick of playing hockey 5 times a week and the doctor personally gave me 2 weeks off from school and anything else I didn't want to do. My friend also got in a car accident giving her a concussion (she milked the shit out of it) early second semester in our grade 12 year. She didn't have to write any tests or hand in any assignments for every class except calculus and was graded at least 15% more for anything she did do. So it's worth a try if you really don't want to write them.
Jan 8 2014 9:41PM
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Gsince93
Posts: 203 - Karma: 286
faking a concussion really is the best option at this point... and it beats the hell out of letting one of my friends hit me in the face with a baseball bat or intentionally slamming at the hill, why did I even consider those. And I suppose a doctor would just take my word if I describe the right symptoms a few days after it happened. Well time to do some concussion research.
Jan 8 2014 9:50PM
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TheClap.
Posts: 21664 - Karma: 4,140
You.are.a.piece.of.shit
Jan 8 2014 9:57PM
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Logey.
Posts: 2996 - Karma: 457
Bucking a double is a win win. If you land it then you just did a double, if you get a concussion then you got what you want!
Jan 8 2014 9:57PM
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Porsntar
Posts: 290 - Karma: 18
attempt to get mono, frostbite, hypothermia
Jan 8 2014 9:59PM
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worstmemberever
Posts: 66 - Karma: 19
Meanwhile, in canada...
Jan 8 2014 10:08PM
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GayWolf420
Posts: 37397 - Karma: 120,258
U GOTTA PAY THE TROLL TOLL TO GET INTO THE BOYS HOLE
Jan 8 2014 10:11PM
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worstmemberever
Posts: 66 - Karma: 19
Ask the same question multiple times. Thats what i did when i had a concussion
Jan 8 2014 10:12PM
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Gsince93
Posts: 203 - Karma: 286
Click for larger image

but actually I don't think I have the balls to actually go through with this to be honest, but like I said it is a topic worth exploring, for the mean time I will continue to study but if something really good comes up, it's worth having as a plan B... at the least
Jan 8 2014 10:12PM
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T-Bell
Posts: 375 - Karma: 233
Diplomas truly are hyped up to be worse than they actually are. The new math curriculum is so much easier than the old. Last year the Math 30-1 exam could be completely done on your calculator, like you could literally punch in each multiple choice answer and see what comes out as the right one.

Study hard, and don't stress. Most people bomb them because they freak out thinking about the 50%. As long as you try hard you'll do good, and it's all worth it in the end. Even if you have to put in days of studying, finishing high school with good grades opens doors to post secondary.
Jan 8 2014 10:13PM
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GayWolf420
Posts: 37397 - Karma: 120,258
lol have fun having a teacher call your fucking bluff next week you retard.
Jan 8 2014 10:15PM
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Ethan.G
Posts: 1166 - Karma: 465
Agreed with T-Bell, they aren't as bad as they are hyped up to be in my opinion. I mean yeah it sucks that 50% of your mark is based solely on one exam but as long as you know the general material you'll probably be fine. Not gonna lie I didn't study all that much for mine and still did pretty well. Of course that's different for subjects like chem or physics imo if you're taking those maybe put in some effort to study.
Jan 8 2014 10:19PM
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T-Bell
Posts: 375 - Karma: 233
sorry for dub post but yes, they rarely completely allow you to not write it. I've heard of two cases, one was my sisters friend had mono (legitimately) and the second was last year Calgary students got them deferred because of the flood. Especially because you are in the first semester, they can make you write the exams you've missed in the second semester exam weeks if you claim to have something like a concussion. At least that is what happened to my friend. They just postponed them until he could write. Not easy to get out of
Jan 8 2014 10:20PM
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TheBigApple
Posts: 1169 - Karma: 488
Diplomas were a breeze. Bumped all my marks up. 50% finals ftw
Jan 8 2014 10:22PM
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Gsince93
Posts: 203 - Karma: 286
Well with everything in consideration I think I'll just write them (thanks for the advice) which isn't very epic but I just learned a lot of places will waive your diploma marks if they suck so pretty much I can't lose, even though going to school in Saskatchewan does seem not super cool it beats not going to university...Anyone know if american schools count your diploma marks???
Jan 9 2014 1:10PM
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arnie_grape
Posts: 3451 - Karma: 11,683
yeah I dunno about alberta but all the standardized tests in ontario are easy as fuck and if you don't pass you definitely don't deserve to graduate so maybe you're just a retard op.
Jan 9 2014 4:40PM
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timmi
Posts: 12874 - Karma: 3,460
I wouldn't worry about the test too much man it sounds like you're destined for the oil fields already.
Jan 9 2014 4:46PM
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GayWolf420
Posts: 37397 - Karma: 120,258
yeah they just make you do it on another date. my friend wacked his head right before finals week a few years back and had to take all his tests like the first week he came back. that seems way to stressful.
Jan 9 2014 5:10PM
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will_powder
Posts: 3194 - Karma: 5,445
No they take your SAT scores. But if you can't do your diplomas, good luck with that.

Alberta diplomas were chill. Honestly they only suck when you have a really high average going in, having a low average means you can only go up.
Jan 9 2014 5:58PM
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gotti
Posts: 4269 - Karma: 4,550
we do sats or acts and almost all colleges require one of them for application to college but you can take them multiple times
Jan 9 2014 6:37PM
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chicken
Posts: 6843 - Karma: 2,123
how about write the fucking test?

you better get used to 50% exams. And you will never have ones as easy as the AB diploma exams again.
Jan 9 2014 8:00PM
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Gsince93
Posts: 203 - Karma: 286
Yeah I'm going in high so really I'm just being ridiculous because I want the in class marks I have now and the odds are I'm going to do relatively well I just don't want to choke and go from 85s to 65s but you guys say they're chill so I should be good....social still wigs me out a bit though I just don't want the essay topic to be absolute shit... Like Cold War would be no big deal but if they pull out some wild card like post modernism, the Indian act or the Iroquois confederacy things may be different...
Jan 9 2014 8:19PM
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Mr.LemonPie
Posts: 4100 - Karma: 1,625
Your name is Gsince93, why would you still be in high school at 20 years old?
Jan 9 2014 8:40PM
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Gsince93
Posts: 203 - Karma: 286
Haha I knew someone was going to bring that up.... It rhymed, nothing goes with 96 unless ... Well I considered suckingdixsince96 but that would have been a hassle to have to type when I sign in. Much too long.
Jan 9 2014 10:09PM
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chacha33
Posts: 959 - Karma: 4,163
Try doing meth, thats how I come up with all of my ideas
Jan 9 2014 10:20PM
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Shredsterr
Posts: 2090 - Karma: 6,930
I could kill you for 50 bucks.
Jan 9 2014 10:24PM
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Gsince93
Posts: 203 - Karma: 286
Do you have pay pal?
Jan 9 2014 11:53PM
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skiersupreme
Posts: 1549 - Karma: 4,872
take the fuckin test you pusscake
Jan 10 2014 12:00AM
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Sno.
Posts: 12155 - Karma: 6,152
tldr
Jan 10 2014 12:29AM
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