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October, 2024

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Nighttime Backyard sesh = shat pants

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Migo
Posts: 528 - Karma: 1,741
So My friend and I were hitting my pvc rail in my backyard last night. We've been out there for a while and started to here howling of some sort of animal. So every once and a while we would check tree line at the end of my field to know if we could see the animal that was making this noise. Then about 20 minutes after the heard the first original howl. I looked towards the tree line and saw two big ass wolfs come running at us. I immediately shat my pants and ran inside with my friend. Wow I can't even ski in my backyard without being kicked out . Damn nature you scary!
Dec 22 2013 5:51PM
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Mr.Sloth
Posts: 5091 - Karma: 13,469
Pics of pants and wolves required
Dec 22 2013 6:10PM
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SDrvpr
Posts: 851 - Karma: 649
Are you actually a sloth?
Dec 22 2013 6:13PM
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gpitcher
Posts: 2626 - Karma: 1,691
^
Dec 22 2013 6:16PM
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broto
Posts: 9039 - Karma: 25,662
are we talking shat in the literal or metaphorical sense here? this is important
Dec 22 2013 6:16PM
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Peter.
Posts: 23796 - Karma: 13,014
the wolves clearly wanted to shred with you guys
Dec 22 2013 6:18PM
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Migo
Posts: 528 - Karma: 1,741
Both
Dec 22 2013 7:36PM
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Migo
Posts: 528 - Karma: 1,741
Like to all of you who have seen the movie "grey" were talking that type of shit
Dec 22 2013 7:41PM
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-WZ-
Posts: 3600 - Karma: 6,582
train the wolves to be your pets?
Dec 22 2013 7:49PM
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GaryColeman
Posts: 248 - Karma: 380
Wait. there's wolves in maine?
Dec 22 2013 8:15PM
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TACO-DOG.exe
Posts: 11988 - Karma: 12,261
then they can tow you into features. no more speed issues!
Dec 22 2013 8:17PM
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jordangaebel
Posts: 365 - Karma: 92
thats why you keep a .45 in your pocket at all times.. you dont know when you will have to do some hood rat shit
Dec 22 2013 8:18PM
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Hypno_Cat
Posts: 997 - Karma: 1,229
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Dec 22 2013 8:19PM
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t-the-east
Posts: 131 - Karma: 219
This. Coyotes maybe?
Dec 22 2013 8:40PM
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Chris.B
Posts: 464 - Karma: 683
Was it anything like the movie frozen?
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Dec 22 2013 9:01PM
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t-the-east
Posts: 131 - Karma: 219
Neighbor's dogs....
Dec 22 2013 9:12PM
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jordangaebel
Posts: 365 - Karma: 92
Why would you run away when you could just kick them in the fucking face with your ski boots... ski boots are like steal toed boots x 100 cuz thug.
Dec 22 2013 9:16PM
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joshua
Posts: 5046 - Karma: 1,280
So we have three more powerful faster moving wolves with teeth and sharper senses, vs. two people with hard shoes?

Also, it didn't work in Frozen, and that movie is entirely realistic which is what makes it so scary.
Dec 22 2013 9:54PM
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tdollo
Posts: 3772 - Karma: 18,558
lol
Dec 22 2013 10:01PM
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Andyktm
Posts: 834 - Karma: -253
Was expecting a story about one of you guys falling on a rail and releasing a load of shit out of your ass but I enjoyed you story as well
Dec 22 2013 10:06PM
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123+ski
Posts: 2832 - Karma: 581
this exactly haha
Dec 22 2013 10:22PM
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Weeezy
Posts: 385 - Karma: 342
The same thing happened to me, except instead of wolves, it was some guy on drugs who couldnt talk. Not having a fence is shit
Dec 23 2013 12:33AM
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steezburgereddie
Posts: 1059 - Karma: 1,945
Something similar happened to my brother with a homeless guy holding an ax. He just wanted to skip stones with them, why couldn't you give the wolves a chance.
Dec 23 2013 12:43AM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,485
OP is clearly a skinny pant wearing fairy, not a thugged out gangster on the hill
Dec 23 2013 7:37AM
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ny300z
Posts: 1299 - Karma: 1,708
shouldve pet them ya mary
Dec 23 2013 8:53AM
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humpty
Posts: 1190 - Karma: 3,162
Wolves are my spirit animal
Dec 23 2013 9:44AM
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ChargeTheTrees
Posts: 129 - Karma: 5
try getting hunted down by a mountain lion in the pitch dark while backpacking. scariest noises ever come from the mouth of a mountain lion.
Dec 23 2013 10:12AM
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Jamartini
Posts: 408 - Karma: 1,663
OP wears pants, what a noob
Dec 23 2013 10:26AM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51666 - Karma: 162,558


OP buys this shirt because of it's trendiness

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Shit's his pants and runs inside at the first possibility of actual wolves.


Wolves get down too man. You should have just chilled with them. They get a bad wrap. I was up working in the park one night and a wolf came out of the woods and started howling and motioning with it's head. Finally I follower it into the woods for maybe 1/4 mile? Got to this cave and there was a whole pack of them. They weren't mean creatures like the media portrays them. They even offered me some meat from a kill to which I passed as I had already eaten before the mountain closed down. Ended up going back in there almost every night I was working to hang out with them. Names them all and got to watch their young grow up. One night I went back there and saw no play, or joy amongst them. Amaroq was not with them. I grew concerned. In the bar the next day I heard a hunter bragging about killing some wolf up in the woods. It filled me with rage and I vowed to have my vengeance for the life of my friend.
Dec 23 2013 10:32AM
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CaptainObvious.
Posts: 5712 - Karma: 20,638
One time I was doing some urban, and heard a strange grunting noise coming from a nearby alley.

My buddies and I continued, but kept an eye on the alley to make sure nothing crazy was there making the noise.

I just finished drinking a venti, double shot, vanilla caramel latte, and did a quick switch up on the rail.

When i landed I saw a flash of red and skiierman came sprinting out of the alley at us.

We both shat our pants and ran home crying.
Dec 23 2013 10:33AM
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brov1
Posts: 1826 - Karma: 8,837
no, train the wolves to be your new pants, they owe you some
Dec 23 2013 10:48AM
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Olimar
Posts: 3535 - Karma: 4,076
youre trying too hard.
Dec 23 2013 11:05AM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51666 - Karma: 162,558
Not really. I generally spew bullshit and I type fast. That post took very little time.
Dec 23 2013 11:11AM
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Migo
Posts: 528 - Karma: 1,741
If they were coyotes, they were some big fuckers. I have a 120 LB german shepherd, and those things were like 1.5x the size of my dog. Didn't stick around long enough to find out and didn't want to.
Dec 23 2013 4:42PM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,485
Male gray wolves on average are around 100lbs... You're trying to tell me you saw two 180lb wolves?
Dec 23 2013 5:02PM
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Migo
Posts: 528 - Karma: 1,741
1.5x in size does not imply that they are 1.5x in weight. Also my uncle shot a 149lb wolf in northern Maine so theres that.
Dec 23 2013 5:16PM
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Migo
Posts: 528 - Karma: 1,741
whoops 139lbs rather.
Dec 23 2013 5:30PM
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diplipsteeze
Posts: 39 - Karma: 13
Shipped?
Jan 3 2014 8:52PM
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PureSport
Posts: 77 - Karma: 305
Probably not wolf, you took shrooms and the "wolf" was going to take you on a spiritually journey..
This also explains why you shit your pants
Jan 3 2014 10:07PM
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