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Public Urinal Etiquette

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SlurmrnHurnyBurn
Posts: 315 - Karma: 765
When you enter the restrooms at any public facility do you…

Poo? (some people are grossed out knowing someone else just shit there)

Look at other males shlongs or shlorts?

Wash your hands?

Any other routines you have?

I only poo if I see a clean toilet, I don't mind a warm seat. I also only wash if there are paper towels, fuck blow drying.


Dec 17 2013 8:54PM
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gr4
Posts: 1499 - Karma: 945
you poop in urinals? there should be laws against that
Dec 17 2013 8:55PM
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-WZ-
Posts: 3600 - Karma: 6,582
OP shits in urinals
Dec 17 2013 8:57PM
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Dr.Dealgood
Posts: 2587 - Karma: 1,352
I have no qualms about public toilets. And you don't look, that's not even a question.

And I always crack up though when a guy comes up to a crowded urinal area and ... just ... can't ... get 'er goin.... and he thanks god a stall opened up for a private pee time.
Dec 17 2013 9:01PM
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JahLiam
Posts: 2321 - Karma: 7,828
You can't choose a urinal when someone is directly beside it
Dec 17 2013 9:01PM
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GIF
Posts: 468 - Karma: 1,279
I like to lie on the ground in front of the stalls and then slither like a little snakey snake under them so that i can check out what all the other guys are gifted with.
Dec 17 2013 9:03PM
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Dr.Dealgood
Posts: 2587 - Karma: 1,352
You have to when you're at a crowded bar.

Use your imagination Peter Pan.
Dec 17 2013 9:04PM
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MontanaMountains
Posts: 385 - Karma: 699
I always put toilet paper on the seat so I do not get infected with pubic lice. Also, if it is not automatic flush I don't flush to save water
Dec 17 2013 9:08PM
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SlurmrnHurnyBurn
Posts: 315 - Karma: 765
Its weird, on some days I can't get a nice stream going. Other days my weiner explodes and splashes all the other rivals with my territorial staining.
Dec 17 2013 9:12PM
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whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,103
you have to go right next to someone and try to high five him
Dec 17 2013 9:12PM
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SlurmrnHurnyBurn
Posts: 315 - Karma: 765
You just leave your battle shit afloat? You sick sick man
Dec 17 2013 9:13PM
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youngdtay
Posts: 3122 - Karma: -112
This sounds relatively similar to my usual routine.
Dec 17 2013 9:15PM
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swoger
Posts: 607 - Karma: 655
leave at least one urinal gap when peeing!!! unless there are dividers
Dec 17 2013 9:20PM
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FerrisBueller
Posts: 8280 - Karma: 5,173
I took a shit in a urinal and someone walked in on me after I was done and he didn't say anything, and started peeing on my shit.
Dec 17 2013 9:26PM
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ql1
Posts: 22 - Karma: 193
i like to stare so deep into the eyes of the person next me that i catch a glimpse of their soul. Also i drop the drawers ankle height
Dec 17 2013 9:34PM
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cannaguts666
Posts: 504 - Karma: 256
Pooin:

1. Grab paper towel
2. Wet paper towel and put a drop of soap on it
3. Go to cripple stall, if not vacant come back. If a right now, any stall.
4. Check for shit tickets on the roll or grab a handful from another stall.
5. Wipe seat with towel and soap.
6. Pull em' down and shit.
7. Wipe, flush, put clothes back on.
8. Wash hands, leave.

Pee:

1. Walk in, piss, wash hands, leave.


Wash your fucking hands, even after a piss. That shits nasty.
Dec 17 2013 9:50PM
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Dan.
Posts: 7201 - Karma: 1,126
just nod and say 'tight dick'
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Dec 17 2013 9:51PM
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cr4wdaddy
Posts: 11 - Karma: 28
wait until three spots open up and take the middle
Dec 17 2013 10:02PM
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chicken
Posts: 6843 - Karma: 2,123
Are you fucking kidding me?

wash your hands, don't look at other guys dicks, take a shit if you need to, and always leave one-urinal gap if possible.

Never take the middle of a 3-urinal layout unless the other two are being used.

stupidest thread. why did I even respond?
Dec 18 2013 1:30AM
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Beaansss
Posts: 301 - Karma: 985
Ask the guy beside you when taking a piss if he wants to pinch and switch. I do this to prevent being bored.
Dec 18 2013 1:54AM
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Rusticles
Posts: 2180 - Karma: 1,337
stand back a foot or two, do not want splash back, do not care if others look at my dick.

Dec 18 2013 2:00AM
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JordanButtfart
Posts: 1013 - Karma: 3,027
What about beatin' the meat? That's kosher right?
Dec 18 2013 2:13AM
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special-J
Posts: 1572 - Karma: 4,477

Dec 18 2013 2:15AM
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pat_in_the_hat
Posts: 3019 - Karma: 2,695
^ that video is wrong and directed by a situationally awkward pussy
Dec 18 2013 9:21AM
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CaptainObvious.
Posts: 5712 - Karma: 20,638
I always take the middle urinal, stand two feet back, and pee in all three like I'm a sprinkler watering three lovely porcelain trees.

I do this every time. Regardless of occupants of any of the urinals.
Dec 18 2013 10:16AM
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Barefootin_Fiend
Posts: 7618 - Karma: 4,727
that video can't be serious. it was on point up until they said once every other urinal is occupied, turn around and come back later. fuck that...can you imagine trying to take a piss at a hockey game/football game/etc. if you couldn't piss unless there were several open urinals in a row?
Dec 18 2013 10:27AM
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pat_in_the_hat
Posts: 3019 - Karma: 2,695
Why would they have urinals in the middle if they are not to be used? And I talk in the bathroom all the time, not a big deal at all, makes it less awkard. and he talks about people talking about linux while pissing, fucking piss shy nerd
Dec 18 2013 10:51AM
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Sir.Steezealot
Posts: 1156 - Karma: 677
I usually initiate conversations to the dude next me by slowly rubbing his back while me and him piss in unison.
Dec 18 2013 11:02AM
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crab_pretzel
Posts: 3919 - Karma: 622
Click for larger image
Dec 18 2013 11:08AM
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dela
Posts: 63 - Karma: 102
I always love when a dude walks in and refuses to piss at a urinal that is in between two that are already in use.  Like seriously?  How fucking old are you? 

I mean I don't go out of my way to piss next to people, but if I have to decide to either wait or use a urinal that is in between two people, I'm pissing.

It's not like the guy beside you is gonna wipe his cock on you or something.  I mean I suppose it's possible but I'm yet to encounter it. 

I think it shows a seriously lack of maturity if you can't handle pissing next to someone.  That and it's funny how uncomfortable and dumbfounded people look when you walk up and start pissing at a urinal right beside them.
Dec 18 2013 11:20AM
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El_Barto.
Posts: 11661 - Karma: 24,364
wat?
Dec 18 2013 11:20AM
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stickski
Posts: 1938 - Karma: 1,529
easily the hardest I've laughed on ns in months. well done
Dec 18 2013 11:41AM
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broto
Posts: 9039 - Karma: 25,662
the general idea of public restrooms is to make it as uncomfortable as possible for everyone else. fart as loud as possible, no shame
Dec 18 2013 11:42AM
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Elg
Posts: 2998 - Karma: 3,880
bunch of homophobic insecure boys in here. Whats wrong with taking piss next to someone?
Dec 18 2013 3:35PM
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Rafiki
Posts: 3858 - Karma: 2,251
how long have you guys been dating now?
Dec 18 2013 3:41PM
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theblackrod
Posts: 2162 - Karma: 575
dating? thats accepting his marriage proposal
Dec 18 2013 4:14PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51630 - Karma: 162,077
Worst Op for this topic ever
Dec 18 2013 4:25PM
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KingTaco
Posts: 2510 - Karma: 2,829
Dude your rod is just skin thats like saying you need to wash your hands if you touch anywhere on your body. I get that washing your hands when you go to the bathroom is just a good time to get a wash in but washing after every piss is highly unnecessary
Dec 18 2013 5:58PM
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sNaubi
Posts: 1633 - Karma: 2,357
relevant.

Dec 18 2013 6:08PM
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SlurmrnHurnyBurn
Posts: 315 - Karma: 765
Exactly, how dirty can your dick be? unless you get pee on your hands, you should be ok if you don't wash.
Dec 18 2013 6:25PM
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KingTaco
Posts: 2510 - Karma: 2,829
even still urine is sterile. i guess washing hands after pissing is unnecessary 100% of the time
Dec 18 2013 8:11PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51630 - Karma: 162,077
and I like the taste

Click for larger image
Dec 18 2013 10:04PM
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willifast
Posts: 248 - Karma: 299
sorry, I'm on mobile but highly relevant. http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cZO9tMetxno
Dec 18 2013 10:15PM
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SlurmrnHurnyBurn
Posts: 315 - Karma: 765
That was a waste of two minutes.
Dec 18 2013 10:19PM
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elinde
Posts: 1467 - Karma: 3,052
FUCK YES. Kids do this at my school all the time.
Dec 18 2013 10:24PM
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Chubbs.
Posts: 1018 - Karma: 2,647
Click for larger image
Dec 18 2013 10:38PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51630 - Karma: 162,077
I'll just pee in the sink and win the game.

Also to thread

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Think that's bad?

Click for larger image

Fuck this shit I'm out

Click for larger image

Dec 18 2013 10:49PM
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AT-AT
Posts: 3281 - Karma: 3,256
I do this all the time. I find it kinda comical. Im not gun shy so it doesnt bother me one bit, but the other guy usually freeks out.
Dec 18 2013 11:00PM
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Barefootin_Fiend
Posts: 7618 - Karma: 4,727
dude you're fucking weird. I'm not gun shy either, but that shit's odd. you're totally sending off a vibe by doing that...
Dec 19 2013 11:07AM
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kevmac
Posts: 347 - Karma: 1,172
i like to shit in the handicap stall there is more room to spread out and stretch
Dec 19 2013 11:13AM
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greene
Posts: 184 - Karma: 66
At my school there are 5 urinals in a row, and I have a friend that pees in them by day of the week. One day there was one of my teachers peeing in the thursday urinal, and it was wednesday. My friend walks into the bathroom, and proudly goes to pee in the wednesday urinal right next to my peeing teacher, meanwhile every other urinal was open. My teacher looks right at my friend and says "what the fuck man?" My friend casually smiles at the teacher and keeps on peeing. The teacher still thinks my friend is a fucking wierdo.
Dec 19 2013 1:41PM
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