Member of the Month

hi_vis360
November, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

YOU KNOW YOU'RE A SKI BUM IF.............

profile picture
STwoops
Posts: 2941 - Karma: 5,126
You think Netflix is out of your budget.

You never buy more than 4 things at the grocery store at a time.

You think you look cool in your 7 year old ripped to shreds gear but you look homeless

You forego shampoo and body wash for some new wax.

Your ski boots dont and will never be new or fitted.

Your bases are so beat up you're not sure how the things still slide.

You dont feel safe in your bindings ever

Your ski gear is both never washed never dried and always thrown in the same pile everyday

Nothing else in your life makes sense quite like skiing does.
Dec 16 2013 12:00AM
1054 196
profile picture
brandonhausner
Posts: 201 - Karma: 837
if you don't know your real shirt size
Dec 16 2013 12:05AM
121 1
profile picture
Meeds
Posts: 73 - Karma: 335
have to hitchhike to and from the hill every day
Dec 16 2013 12:22AM
43 0
profile picture
HamFaceGirl
Posts: 5242 - Karma: 2,676
I hate the "You know you're a ______ if"
Dec 16 2013 12:26AM
6 105
profile picture
STwoops
Posts: 2941 - Karma: 5,126
thanks for letting us know
Dec 16 2013 12:29AM
101 1
profile picture
bigbromskier
Posts: 1175 - Karma: 330
wear snow pants more than regular pants.
Dec 16 2013 12:31AM
47 0
profile picture
Drail
Posts: 14012 - Karma: 10,011
Most of the op just sounds like a poor person more than a ski bum.

You know your a ski bum if: you love Christmas morning because you know you'll have the whole ski hill to yourself till at least noon
Dec 16 2013 12:37AM
93 3
profile picture
Sky.
Posts: 1158 - Karma: 287
You've never bought food from the lodge ever, only taken they're hot water to make cup o noodles.
Dec 16 2013 12:46AM
52 1
profile picture
Mr.LemonPie
Posts: 4100 - Karma: 1,625
Where do you think the 'bum' in ski bum comes?
Dec 16 2013 12:46AM
29 2
profile picture
E__
Posts: 5751 - Karma: 4,635
Dude, he's been a ski bum for a long long time, he knows how things work.
Dec 16 2013 12:54AM
20 1
profile picture
Sky.
Posts: 1158 - Karma: 287
Hahaha this! Exactly
Dec 16 2013 12:54AM
7 0
profile picture
WizardofWas
Posts: 224 - Karma: 348
Fuck mountain food prices, I do this everyday!
Dec 16 2013 2:41AM
13 0
profile picture
Troy.
Posts: 5070 - Karma: 12,549
You don't even know what "full retail price" is
Dec 16 2013 8:06AM
33 0
profile picture
SFBv420.0
Posts: 2539 - Karma: 3,124
you ski every day and smile at no or little marketable skill havin live poor skiers
Dec 16 2013 9:04AM
9 0
profile picture
jon@wh2o
Posts: 314 - Karma: 158
If you're out at the hill every day with a smile on your face, rain or shine ice or pow
Dec 16 2013 9:28AM
15 0
profile picture
Elg
Posts: 2998 - Karma: 3,880
they're? really?
Dec 16 2013 9:48AM
39 0
profile picture
freeskibum82
Posts: 6355 - Karma: 5,057
thats more suited for "you know you are a ski shop employee when"
Dec 16 2013 10:30AM
8 0
profile picture
Threshy
Posts: 444 - Karma: 938
The only bed you know is your car.
Dec 16 2013 11:01AM
17 0
profile picture
Mr.Bishop
Posts: 22708 - Karma: 76,635
You don't have a car or a house, only a camper van.
Dec 16 2013 11:04AM
30 0
profile picture
Shlogan
Posts: 4942 - Karma: 430
Reasons i may call myself a ski bum:
This week, i skied more days than i worked (6, 5)
All of my money goes into skiing gas or pot
I eat most meals from the restaurant that i wash dishes at


I would like to say that the shitty boot comment is not true, i doubt anyone skiing every day would put themselves through being uncomfterble for that long in boots.
Dec 16 2013 11:09AM
31 1
profile picture
STwoops
Posts: 2941 - Karma: 5,126
REAL LIFE: i go to impound lot to get skis out of car, will leave car there because i cant afford to get it out, got it impounded because I cant pay insurance. good thing its not my home. also you know your a ski bum when youve only ever had a car with awd. and you carry your skis on the bus know because you cant afford a locker.
Dec 16 2013 11:09AM
7 0
profile picture
Mr.LemonPie
Posts: 4100 - Karma: 1,625
See I may disagree there...Skiing 300 days a year doesn't make you a ski bum. When skiing puts you into a financial state just barely above homelessness...That's when you're a ski bum.
Dec 16 2013 11:22AM
7 12
profile picture
Blake.P
Posts: 9894 - Karma: 3,585
i cant imagine anybody that cares enough about skiing to not get fitted boots or to not take care of their gear... those are like the two most important things to do to make the most of your season

Dec 16 2013 11:23AM
15 2
profile picture
Blake.P
Posts: 9894 - Karma: 3,585
also, besides baselayers or socks, who the fuck washes ski gear?
Dec 16 2013 11:24AM
15 2
profile picture
The_Polock
Posts: 345 - Karma: 1,280
You've spend more time talking to lifties than your wife during the winter time.

You have your own parking spot at the ski area, but dont work there.

You have every piece of ski gear you've owned for the last 15 years because you might need to salvage parts off of it.
Dec 16 2013 11:32AM
26 0
profile picture
TheTristanator
Posts: 1015 - Karma: 820
you'd be surprised.
Dec 16 2013 11:52AM
4 0
profile picture
Blake.P
Posts: 9894 - Karma: 3,585
no really the only people that dont get fitted are some weekend warriors, new skiiers, and kids that buy full tilts just because. i have never met a die hard skier that doesnt have fitted boots
Dec 16 2013 11:56AM
7 1
profile picture
MWG
Posts: 126 - Karma: 2,213

You Live out of your car

The only type of cooking you know is microwave

Only eat KD, Pizza Pockets and sandwiches




Dec 16 2013 12:06PM
3 0
profile picture
Drail
Posts: 14012 - Karma: 10,011
I'd just call that poor life planning, shitty budgeting, and generally, being young and not knowing any better

You know your a ski bum if: you find yourself unexpectedly driving for hours in the middle of the night because your friend said they are getting hammered with snow ATM without arranging anywhere to stay while you are down there
Dec 16 2013 12:26PM
8 0
profile picture
appa
Posts: 2249 - Karma: 1,739
i like to keep my socks nice and crusty idk about you guys. helps with my afterbang
Dec 16 2013 1:24PM
20 0
profile picture
erica
Posts: 3450 - Karma: 24,088
if you are homeless
Dec 16 2013 1:38PM
6 0
profile picture
slugworth
Posts: 1247 - Karma: 772
I like to stumble into gas stations after a day of skiing and ask for the old free pizza.
It works out surprisingly well for everyone

Dec 16 2013 1:53PM
3 0
profile picture
Blake.P
Posts: 9894 - Karma: 3,585
you know you're a ski bum when your normal lunch is a packet of top ramen that you make in a soda cup filled with hot water from the lodge, seasoned with whatever condiments the lodge has

i have done this wayyy to many times in the past...
Dec 16 2013 1:55PM
5 0
profile picture
thesoloist
Posts: 71 - Karma: 145
Love the full tilts part
Dec 16 2013 2:18PM
2 1
profile picture
John18_6
Posts: 7313 - Karma: 49,165
You only eat ramen.
Dec 16 2013 2:23PM
2 0
profile picture
ESB
Posts: 9274 - Karma: 10,648
What's all this about only eating Ramen in the ski lodge?

Fuck that - I eat it all in the ski lodge. Fries, burgers, nachos, the works.

All you gotta do is intercept people on their way to the garbage bins with half-eaten trays and be all like, "Yo, you gonna eat that?"

That's literally ski "bumming".
Dec 16 2013 2:37PM
46 0
profile picture
Blake.P
Posts: 9894 - Karma: 3,585
ehh i will do that with friends but asking random people for their extra food seems weird to me
Dec 16 2013 2:56PM
0 4
profile picture
erica
Posts: 3450 - Karma: 24,088
I've done this sadly. Not at a ski chalet, but it's perfectly kindof justified as long as you're not sober, right?!
Dec 16 2013 3:24PM
3 0
profile picture
LEATH
Posts: 1315 - Karma: 488
Oh I've walked up to tables after people have left pizza slices or half a plate of nachos or wings and a half drunk pitcher of beer and went to town.

Living four years in Jackson ain't cheap
Dec 16 2013 4:16PM
4 0
profile picture
Valhalla.
Posts: 587 - Karma: 154
It is when you cram 8 people into a 4 bedroom house.

To add to this;

You've only and will only work night jobs, and request your weekends be on Monday and Tuesday so the mountain is less crowded.

You've never paid full price for any of your ski gear, only chumps do that.

The only vacations you take are to go skiing
Dec 16 2013 4:37PM
5 0
profile picture
Merrrick
Posts: 529 - Karma: 717
I tried to get hot water at vail once, and not only did they refuse to give it to me, but they said that bringing my cup noodles into the lodge was "against policy," i went off on that fat ass bitch as if she had just killed a family member.
Dec 16 2013 4:38PM
9 0
profile picture
GayWolf420
Posts: 37540 - Karma: 121,594
i take it you ride the PC buses because they are free? they should deff have one that runs past 12 for all the peeps on main street. cabs are mad pricy here.
Dec 16 2013 4:47PM
3 1
profile picture
k-cal
Posts: 41 - Karma: 351
you always leave the nearest country store full without actually spending any money

Dec 16 2013 5:36PM
0 2
profile picture
FunkyMalone
Posts: 66 - Karma: 640
if you sleep more on floors, couches, and in the great outdoors than a real bed
Dec 16 2013 5:48PM
4 0
profile picture
MustBeMattyB
Posts: 495 - Karma: 2,147
Your girl satisfies and feeds you... Im talking bout your hand
Dec 16 2013 5:50PM
6 1
profile picture
theabortionator
Posts: 51744 - Karma: 163,523
What is this stuff you speak of?


I'll play though

"YOU KNOW YOU'RE A SKI BUM IF............."


Your idea of a stone grind to tune your skis is sliding across the pavement after cleaning an urban rail
Dec 16 2013 6:05PM
8 0
profile picture
SteezeandCheese
Posts: 18 - Karma: 50
You know when your a ski bum when all the lifties know know you better than you girlfriend.
Dec 16 2013 7:44PM
6 0
profile picture
Migo
Posts: 528 - Karma: 1,741
Thread has delivered
Dec 16 2013 9:25PM
5 0
profile picture
last_tango
Posts: 2635 - Karma: 2,665
you know how the unemployment system works in the spring.

you have duck tape on your skis.
Dec 16 2013 9:31PM
3 0
profile picture
perryhunter
Posts: 721 - Karma: -185
Felt like im a real pro here:
You forego shampoo and body wash for some new wax.

Dec 16 2013 9:56PM
0 1
All times are Eastern (-5)