Kanye's new song is absolute shit

this is a particularly worthless thread Kevin. and I've seen a lot of worthless threads lately. Twitter might be a better places for these thoughts

OP i am tired of ur stupid fuckin shit d00d i am gonna kick ur stupid nerd ass d00d

i fuked you're mom

i fucked your once decent sense of grammar into submission

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little shit? Ill have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and Ive been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and Im the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. Youre fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and thats just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little clever comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldnt, you didnt, and now youre paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. Youre fucking dead, kiddo.

wot the fok did ye just say 2 me m8? i dropped out of newcastle primary skool im the sickest bloke ull ever meet & ive nicked ova 300 chocolate globbernaughts frum tha corner shop. im trained in street fitin' & im the strongest foker in tha entire newcastle gym. yer nothin to me but a cheeky lil bellend w/ a fit mum & fakebling. ill waste u and smash a fokin bottle oer yer head bruv, i swer 2 christ. ya think u can fokin run ya gabber at me whilst sittin on yer arse behind a lil screen? think again wanka. im callin me homeboys rite now preparin for a proper scrap. A roomble thatll make ur nan sore jus hearin about it. yer a waste bruv. me crew be all over tha place & ill beat ya to a proper fokin pulp with me fists wanka. if i aint satisfied w/ that ill borrow me m8s cricket paddle & see if that gets u the fok out o' newcastle ya daft kunt. if ye had seen this bloody fokin mess commin ye might a' kept ya gabber from runnin. but it seems yea stupid lil twat, innit? ima shite fury & ull drown in it m8. ur ina proper mess knob.

What the darn-diddily-doodily did you just say about me, you little witcharooney? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class at Springfield Bible College, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret mission trips in Capital City, and I have over 300 confirmed baptisms. I am trained in the Old Testament and I’m the top converter in the entire church mission group. You are nothing to me but just another heathen. I will cast your sins out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before in Heaven, mark my diddily-iddilly words. You think you can get away with saying that blasphemy to me over the Internet? Think again, friendarino. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of evangelists across Springfield and your IP is being traced by God right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggorino. The storm that wipes out the diddily little thing you call your life of sin. You’re going to Church, kiddily-widdily. Jesus can be anywhere, anytime, and he can turn you to the Gospel in over infinity ways, and that’s just with his bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in preaching to nonbelievers, but I have access to the entire dang- diddily Bible collection of the Springfield Bible College and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your sins away off the face of the continent, you diddily-doo satan-worshipper. If only you could have known what holy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you from the Heavens, maybe you would have held your darn-diddily-fundgearoo tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re clean of all your sins, you widdillo-skiddily neighborino. I will sing hymns of praise all over you and you will drown in the love of Christ. You’re farn-foodily- flank-fiddily reborn, kiddo-diddily.

every kanye song has been this way

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little red bitch orb? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the gas giants, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids elliptical orbits, and I have over 300 confirmed storms in my might atmostphere. I am the furthest planet in the solar system and I have the largest liquid water oceans in the known universe. You are nothing to me but just another point of light. I will wipe you the divert comets at your with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on Earth or mars, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of moons across the solar system and your orbital path is being traced right now so you better prepare for the apocalypse, maggot. The impact that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your world. Your fucking dead, kid. I can anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you with a comet over seven miles wide, and that's just with my gravity. Not only am I a large body of mass, but I have access to the entire arsenal of moons and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the solar system, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution you little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo

New song?

I don’t give a fuck who you are or where you live. You can count on me to be there to bring your fucking life to a hellish end. I’ll put you in so much fucking pain that it’ll make Jesus being nailed to a cross in the desert look like a fucking back massage on a tropical island. I don’t give a fuck how many reps you have or how tough you are IRL, how well you can fight, or how many fucking guns you own to protect yourself. I’ll fucking show up at your house when you aren’t home. I’ll turn all the lights on in your house, leave all the water running, open your fridge door and not close it, and turn your gas stove burners on and let them waste gas. You’re going to start stressing the fuck out, your blood pressure will triple, and you’ll have a fucking heart attack. You’ll go to the hospital for a heart operation, and the last thing you’ll see when you’re being put under in the operating room is me hovering above you, dressed like a doctor. When you wake up after being operated on, wondering what ticking time bomb is in your chest waiting to go off. You’ll recover fully from your heart surgery. And when you walk out the front door of the hospital to go home I’ll run you over with my fucking car out of no where and kill you. I just want you to know how easily I could fucking destroy your pathetic excuse of a life, but how I’d rather go to a great fuckng length to make sure your last remaining days are spent in a living, breathing fucking hell. It’s too late to save yourself, but don’t bother committing suicide either… I’ll fucking resuscitate you and kill you again myself you bitch-faced phagit. Welcome to hell, population: you

The white kids sure love him though!

are you kidding me you little piece of shit i’ll have you know i graduated top of my politics class and i’ve been involved in privilege checking with over 150 confirmed political demonstrations i’m trained in conflict resolution and i was the most oppressed person in my entire upper middle class high school you are nothing to me but another cultural appropriator i will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which have never been seen on this side of the 49th parallel mark my words you think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the internet think again fucker, as we speak i’m checking with my anarcho-communist analyst brigade for your location so you better be prepared to deal with some molotov cocktails and angry feminists flying through your window yOU’RE FUCKING DEAD CHERRY

i can be anywhere at any time and i can kill you in over seven hundred ways and that’s just with me boring you to death while i talk about privilege not only am i extensively trained in hotline management but i have access to an entire arsenal of sociological articles to prove my point and i will use them to wipe your fucking face off the earth you little shit if only you had known what oppressed retribution your cultural appropriation would unleash then maybe you would have held your fucking tongue but you couldn’t you’re fucking dead kiddo

Hwat the hell did you just freaking say about me, you little bobby? I'll have you know I graduated at the top of my class in the sales of propane and propane acessories, and I've been involved in numerous secret propane raids on Thatherton Fuels, and I have over 300 confirmed sales. I am trained in grilla warfare and I'm the top salesman in the entire Strickland Propane company. I will wipe you the hell out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before in arlen, mark my god danged words. You think you can get away with saying that crap to me over the phone? Think again, boy. As we speak I am contacting my group of redneck friends across the street and your number is being traced right now so you better prepare for hell, hippie. The hell that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your charcoal grill. You're freaking dead, boy. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can sell to you in over 700 different ways. and thats just with my grill catalog. Not only am I extensively trained in the sales of propane and propane acessories, but I have access to the entire propane and grill stock of Strickland Propane and I will use it to its full extent to sell you a grill thats off the face of the great USA, you little democrat. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" charcoal grill was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your freaking money. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price you god danged idiot. I will spill propane all over you and you will drown in it. You're freaking buying, customer.

Oy wat the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you cheeky kunt? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the SAS, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on abos, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in koala warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire AUS armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this continent, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the computer? Think again, you bloody wombat. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the southern hemisphere and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the typhoon, yobbo. The typhoon that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, ankle biter. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Australian Defence Force and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face off the continent, you little snag. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your bloody tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn whacker. I will shit a cut snake as cross as a frog in a sock all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, nipper.

Back on topic. Fuck gayfish kanye

I say, what the devil did you just audaciously proclaim about my well-being, you trollop? I shall inform you that I have graduated top of my class at the Gentleman's Academy of Sophisticated Persons, and have been involved in numerous endeavors with the Ruffians down the street from my abode; might I also add that I've accumulated over 300 pieces of antique furniture? I am educated in fine dining and high class catering and I'm the top Victorian era furniture appraiser in the entire high society. You are naught to me but a simple, uncouth brute. I shall embarrass the dickens out of you with class the likes of which has never been witnessed before on this humble planet, I solemnly promise. You assume you can disrespect my image on the internet? Think again, savage. As we speak I am contacting my diligent secretary to arrange a brunch together at the finest coffee shop in town, so you had better prepare a fetching enough outfit to compete with my immaculate attire, barbarian. The brunch that sends you packing back to the countryside. You are inevitably defeated, heathen. I can be booked at any appointment, any hour, and I can educate you in over seven hundred cultures, and that's just with the literary selection in my guest lobby. Not only am I extensively fluent in in several languages, I have access to the entire Giorgio Armani fall collection and I will flaunt it's finely tailored mastery to outshine your drab, common appearance off the face of humanity, you slob. If only you had foreseen the kind of comeuppance your inflammatory "insignificant" comment was bound to earn you, perhaps you would have tempered your words. But you insisted, and now I will teach you manners and grace and you will learn dignity and poise, yet. Consider yourself in etiquette school, peasant.

that just got weird

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What the shrek did you just shreking say about me, you little puss? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Shreks, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on fairytale creatures, and I have over 300 confirmed swamps. I am trained in donkeh warfare and I'm the top shreker in the entire Duloc armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will shrek you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this swamp, mark my shreking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, shreker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of pixies across Duloc and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, swamp maggot. The storm that shreks out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking shreked, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can shrek you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare ear tube antenna things. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed shrek, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Duloc Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to shrek your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little puss. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your shreking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're shreking shreked, kiddo.

for my commemorative speech i might do kanye

this thread has been turned around. we have EXERCISEDDDDD THE DEMONS

Check yourself before you Shrek yourself.

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(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻¯\(ºдಠ)/¯ಥಿ೪ಥ (☞ ಥ益ಥ）☞

OY, WUT DA ZOG DID YOU JUS' SAY ABOUT ME, YA STUPID GIT? I'LL 'AVE YOU KNOW I GRADUATID TOP A' MY CLASS IN DA ORK KOMMANDOS, 'N I'VE BEEN IN A BUNCHA SECRIT RAIDZ ON DEM FILFIE 'UMIES, 'N I HAS OVER 300 A DEIR TEEF TA PROVE IT. I'M TRAINED IN THE ART A' STEALF 'N I'M DA BEST AT DAKKA OUTTA ALL DA ORKZ. YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' TO ME BUT JUSS ANOTHER CAN T'SCRAP. I'LL WIPE YA DA ZOG OUT, A DUFF THE LIKES A' WHICH AIN'T NO WUNZ SEEN SINCE DA WARBOSS, YA LIST'NIN'? YA THINKS YOU CAN GET AWAY WIV CALLIN' ME A GROT IN FRONT'A DA WHOLE WAAAAH? FINK AGAIN, SKUM. AS WE YAP OUR GOBS, I'M CALLIN' ALL MY INFILTRA'A'S ACROSS ALL A' ORKDOM 'N DEY'S 'UNTIN' YA RIGHT NOW, SO YOU BESS' PREPARE FOR DA STORM, GIT. DA STORMBOYZ'LL RID YA UH' DAT PUNY LI' L FING YOU CALL A LIFE. YOU'S AS GOOD AS DEAD, YA GROT. I'Z EVERYWHERE 'N EVERYTIME ALL AT ONCE, 'N I'Z CAN KILL YA 700 TIMES WIFOUT EVEN USIN' A SHOOTA. NOT ONLY DAT, BUT I CAN GET ALL THE STIKKBOMBS AN' DAKKA I WANT AND BLOW YOUR TINY 'EAD INTO SO MANY BITS YOU WON' EVEN 'AVE DA CHANCE TA MEET GORK AN' MORK WHEN I'M THROU WIF' YOU. IT'Z A SHAME YOU 'AD NO IDEA THE AMOUNT OF WAAAAGH YOUR SNOTTY GOB-FLAPPIN' WUZ GONNA GET YOU INTO, YOU'DA CUT YOUR TONGUE OUT INSTEAD! BUT YOU DI'N'T, AN' YOU'S FIXIN TA PAY THE PRICE WIF MORE DEN JUS' YER STUPID TEEF. I'LL SHOOT YA SO 'ARD YOU'LL DROWN IN DAKKA. YOU'S AS GOOD AS DEAD.

Yea really just not funny anymore. Not that copy/pasting somebody else's joke is funny in the first place, but now it's like REALLY not funny/

I don't know about copy/pasting, but goddamn do I love nutella. I know it's basically chocolate in a jar, but it has the goodness of hazelnuts and like 15 cups of milk in every container. Whatever the fuck it is, it provides me with the energy I need to start my day. Sometimes I put it on toast with a little bit of brown sugar and cinammon, but believe it or not I sometimes stir it into some vanilla yogurt too. Try that shit. It's also great on strawberries, melons and peaches. It's remarkably low calorie and delicious as fuck. If I had one wish, it would be to visit the nutella factory to see how exactly they make this magic happen. Holy shit I'm now craving nutella like a motherfucker. The open jar is just about empty, but I have another half dozen downstairs in the cellar. Got the lot of them for $15.99 at Costco, which might seem steep until you price it out. That's less than three dollars a jar. When the chinese finally lose their shit and launch the nukes, I'm going to be sitting pretty, because I'll be chilling in my basement watching That 70's Show on DVD and mowing down on some delicious, life-sustaining nutella. Anyway, that copy/pasting sounds pretty good I guess, but you've got to admit it'd look a whole lot better slathered in nutella. Thanks for listening.

Shrek is drek.

Neutron master race reporting in.

>**** YOU HAVE BEEN VISITED BY THE HANK HILL OF DOOM! **** you will die tomorrow
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Everything after Homecoming is junk. Through the Wire is classic tho

lol ok comedy genius. Lets see some of your material, nerd.

WHY ARE WE TYPING IN ALL CAPS???

Quality thread

u wot m8 ill fukn wrek u i swear on me mums life ill wrek u m8


Also, that Kanye song's instrumental sounded like it was from 2003. Not particularly cool.