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What technology could you "invent" 2000 years ago?

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pat_in_the_hat
Posts: 3019 - Karma: 2,695
I always think about this.

What if you were transported back in time 2000 years ago?

What do you completely 100% understand in todays world that you could "invent" back then to make advancements in technology happen sooner and thus develop everything much faster in the future (todays world).
Im not talking about just drawing them on paper (like da vinchi). I mean completely design and build using the tools and materials that were present 2000 years ago.

For me,
-Gliders, most everything dealing with simple flying machines (except helicopters, fuck that)
-Gas powered engines, but I couldnt produce gas or oil(so it wouldnt work)
-simple mechanical systems such as pulleys, hoists, jacks and lifts.
-maybe even electricity with copper coils
Aug 29 2013 1:23PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,272
could you machine parts to build those things out of the materials and machines available at the time though?
Aug 29 2013 1:27PM
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arnie_grape
Posts: 3451 - Karma: 11,678
I would invent skiing
Aug 29 2013 1:34PM
14 1
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pat_in_the_hat
Posts: 3019 - Karma: 2,695
they has steel 2000 years ago. I would just forge it, or cast it. I could do that.
Aug 29 2013 1:37PM
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snowpocalypse
Posts: 1036 - Karma: 3,525
Fake titties
tooth brushes
tampons
deodorant
Beer

Simple things that would make me RICH BITCH! and make woman look better and not stink.
Aug 29 2013 1:44PM
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howlongcanausern
Posts: 4982 - Karma: 1,737
shitty threads
reposts
trolling
Aug 29 2013 1:50PM
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Bogs
Posts: 4296 - Karma: 1,361
sliced bread?
Aug 29 2013 1:52PM
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CaptainObvious.
Posts: 5712 - Karma: 20,638
2000 years is hard.

Just send me back like...100 or so. Bottled Water. I'd be such a boss.
Aug 29 2013 1:55PM
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corona
Posts: 12795 - Karma: 32,751
you'd be a couple thousand years late for a few of those.
Aug 29 2013 2:10PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,272
the oldest recipe ever found was for beer
Aug 29 2013 2:11PM
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84891jnf92048
Posts: 11552 - Karma: 2,550
i would invent rock and roll
Aug 29 2013 2:59PM
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Spinoza
Posts: 12763 - Karma: 3,846
A photon cannon. And a space shuttle that runs on only my semen and the government would hire ladies to harvest the fuel.
Yes I understand the question.
Aug 29 2013 3:02PM
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Willgum
Posts: 3254 - Karma: 3,066
I'd say distilled spirits(vodka etc) and get jesus absolutely plastered.

Oh and bongs
Aug 29 2013 3:04PM
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Spinoza
Posts: 12763 - Karma: 3,846
Jesus did just fine getting drunk, dude could turn water into wine he brushed his teeth with it
Aug 29 2013 3:05PM
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
I wonder how it was.
Aug 29 2013 6:42PM
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NinetyFour
Posts: 8650 - Karma: 13,409
Condoms.
Aug 29 2013 6:49PM
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SterlingArcher
Posts: 2200 - Karma: 2,456
Boogie woogie oneski
Aug 29 2013 6:52PM
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Pancake_Fucker
Posts: 1843 - Karma: 1,917
Viagra
Aug 29 2013 6:53PM
3 1
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Spagett+
Posts: 3499 - Karma: 14,884
I would somehow invent the internet just to stop ns from happening. Maybe make the first porn site and call in "newschoolers, Skiing's online community"
Aug 29 2013 7:03PM
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SFB
Posts: 8895 - Karma: 26,352
i would invent a wu tang and be loved by lots of teenage skiers.
Aug 29 2013 8:02PM
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broto
Posts: 9039 - Karma: 25,662
drukn
Aug 29 2013 8:41PM
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Barefootin_Fiend
Posts: 7618 - Karma: 4,727
that would be the best trick ever. imagine how awesome you could be at sports betting? bet that team A will win.....wait until team B drank a bunch of water and then bam! turn all of the water in their stomachs in to wine so they got all drunk...guaranteed to lose.

hell, it'd also be the ultimate weapon. the human body is made up of something like 50% watert....BAM, turn all of that water in to wine and the person would croak instantly...it'd be hella easy to off a mother fucker.
Aug 29 2013 8:56PM
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Dunnah
Posts: 1215 - Karma: 277
How do you expect to forge an engine and all of its components?
Aug 29 2013 9:36PM
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panojibber.
Posts: 1041 - Karma: 683
Paper airplane.

Aug 29 2013 9:40PM
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Piste.Off
Posts: 11586 - Karma: 1,860
racism
Aug 29 2013 10:09PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,272
probably horrible. most old beer was nothing like it is today. it was basically water with a bunch of shit floating in it and people only drank it since the water was way too dirty
Aug 29 2013 10:15PM
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egg.
Posts: 3231 - Karma: 3,477
Gave me a lol
Aug 29 2013 10:34PM
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GIF
Posts: 468 - Karma: 1,279
I would invent a really comfortable matress that isn't made of straw and the assembly line and then make tons of beds
Aug 29 2013 11:20PM
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SFB
Posts: 8895 - Karma: 26,352
THATS DUMB LIKE UR FACE!!!
Aug 29 2013 11:24PM
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GIF
Posts: 468 - Karma: 1,279
Why is that dumb? Think about how amazing bed is
Aug 29 2013 11:26PM
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Spinoza
Posts: 12763 - Karma: 3,846
Genius. Can't believe he didn't think of that when they were trying to kill him. Could still be alive today
Aug 30 2013 6:17AM
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Laurent.
Posts: 10056 - Karma: 25,313
Something I can seize power with so I can crown myself as king and have fresh hot girls delivered to me daily from every corner of my empire.
Aug 30 2013 6:38AM
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JAHBRADOR
Posts: 3004 - Karma: 17,069
dis you bro?
Aug 30 2013 7:29AM
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Stickity
Posts: 7750 - Karma: 769
I'd take the time to learn everything about making coke (the fuel) then go back in time and make that. You'd be so fucking rich it wouldn't be funny.
Aug 30 2013 12:11PM
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Olimar
Posts: 3535 - Karma: 4,076
condoms

/thread
Aug 30 2013 1:50PM
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Olimar
Posts: 3535 - Karma: 4,076
fuck.
Aug 30 2013 1:51PM
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Dr.Dickless
Posts: 2620 - Karma: 1,392
machining would definitely be required, cast pistons in a gasoline engine? nope, you could invent the engine lathe though
Aug 30 2013 1:58PM
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Brule.
Posts: 3920 - Karma: 6,206
CHOCOLATE MILK!

Click for larger image
Aug 30 2013 2:03PM
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Dr.Dickless
Posts: 2620 - Karma: 1,392
just shit that would make you super rich

aspirin, patent that shit
AC current, fuck you Thomas edison
the assembly line
TQM, sell it to harley davidson

Aug 30 2013 2:07PM
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Threshy
Posts: 444 - Karma: 938
I would call myself the Hero Of Alexandra and move to Greece and invent the steam engine. Oh wait...
Aug 30 2013 2:31PM
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snowpocalypse
Posts: 1036 - Karma: 3,525
That was Nicola Tesla who invented AC/DC current bro.
Aug 30 2013 5:23PM
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Zimmerman
Posts: 6992 - Karma: 1,021
honey dutch
Aug 30 2013 10:28PM
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MASkier
Posts: 657 - Karma: 704
A rudimentary low geared pedal car. Imagine how much that would open up trade. Then I would use assembly line production to build rifles, and go to the good old us of a get the native americans on my side, get them to be my army and shit. have them start digging for oil, and iron ore. train blacksmiths and carpenters, and build airplanes. then I would take over europe with my high tech indian army.
Aug 31 2013 12:24AM
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jblaski
Posts: 5566 - Karma: 1,078
I'd make a globe, with all the current cities and everything. It would take about 1500 years for everyone to realize it, but it would blow people's minds.
Aug 31 2013 12:25AM
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Pancake_Fucker
Posts: 1843 - Karma: 1,917
I'd go back just to kill you if you did that.
Aug 31 2013 6:59PM
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