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Within the next two weeks I'm gonna have a silk screen printing shop. Pm me then or something and we could work something out. It might take longer though to get all my supplies for it, so don't take my word on it as of right now.
Depending on your budget or how ghetto you want to be you could allways try to iron a Die-cut onto it. it works about fifty percent of the time. If you bought a huge Level 1 die cut and gave it a shot it could be sweet.
you should get jibberish on it, and say that they made it special for you and it cost 1 million dollars then sell it for a deal (750k) then buy real jibberish