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October, 2024

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Do I own a slave?

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TannerBalls
Posts: 3197 - Karma: 1,310
So it all started when I got my new job in Seattle. I live like 40 minutes from my work but with the car pool lane it takes 20 minutes. There was a bum that hung out by my apartment everyday and I would see him trying to get hand outs in the morning when I headed to work. AND that's when it hit me, I will train this homeless guy to ride in my car to work so I can ride in the HOV lane and get to work faster.

Fast forward to now. I now have a bum/friend that rides in my car to work and I repay with change and coffee so that I can get to work faster. His name is Jamal and he's actually a pretty nice homeless guy.

I didn't feel bad about this until now because Jamal now drives me to work. I literally pay him in coffee and he drives me to work in the car pool lane #winning. So do I own a slave?
Jun 7 2013 1:42AM
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000000000000
Posts: 843 - Karma: 1,552
Is he your slave? Why can I never appreciate your posts.......
Jun 7 2013 1:45AM
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SkiBladeHero
Posts: 41 - Karma: 36
technically you pay him so no

but because he is most likely black yes
Jun 7 2013 1:46AM
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bo0b
Posts: 2964 - Karma: 996
More of a butler/chauffeur, living like a Princess Di.
Jun 7 2013 1:46AM
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TannerBalls
Posts: 3197 - Karma: 1,310
Yeah he's half black but that's not the point.
Jun 7 2013 1:49AM
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skisalot111
Posts: 723 - Karma: 158
why dont you just drive in the HOV lane without the homeless guy? nobody really cares...
Jun 7 2013 1:49AM
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TannerBalls
Posts: 3197 - Karma: 1,310
That's like a 250$ ticket.
Jun 7 2013 1:50AM
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fujarome
Posts: 8630 - Karma: 1,561
that's a pretty good plan actually. I'm going to go out and find me a bum who needs to get where I'm going.


Reminds me of the handicapped kid rentals at Disney. Same concept. Is it ethical? Probably not. Is everyone getting what they want? Yes. So who cares?
Jun 7 2013 1:52AM
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jake_tom_sully
Posts: 356 - Karma: 242
You may not own a slave but you are fucking winning at life.
Jun 7 2013 1:55AM
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TannerBalls
Posts: 3197 - Karma: 1,310
I think I will give Jamal a raise tomorrow. So I feel less like a slave master.
Jun 7 2013 1:57AM
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yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
Well how much do you dish out to this homeless guy within a given period where the $250 fine would repeat itself. Say you get a $250 ticket once a month. Is that more money than what you invest into your homeless friend via coffee, change, and gas (you waste gas when you stop and go. That could be 2 cents a day!).Weigh out the options.

Ethically speaking? You're doing good.
Jun 7 2013 2:01AM
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fujarome
Posts: 8630 - Karma: 1,561
my father was pissed. Not because it was the wrong thing to do, but because when we went to Disney World in early 1995, he spent most of the trip saying that someday he was going to gather up the old people in the nearby communities, put them in wheel chairs, and rent them out at Disney. Never thought someone would beat him to it.
Jun 7 2013 2:05AM
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TannerBalls
Posts: 3197 - Karma: 1,310
I definitely dont shell out 250 clams a month to my slave. But I forgot to add that I give him my old clothes too.
Jun 7 2013 2:07AM
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HungryHypocrite
Posts: 765 - Karma: 939
yeah youre pretty much winning.

did you ever see his drivers license?
Jun 7 2013 2:40AM
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Piste.Off
Posts: 11586 - Karma: 1,860
sounds more like an indentured servant
Jun 7 2013 2:43AM
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SkiFreshPow
Posts: 233 - Karma: 335
You weren't by chance driving in a large truck, and happened to cause a bridge to collapse up north a few weeks ago?
Jun 7 2013 2:46AM
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eheath
Posts: 61603 - Karma: 123,084
He's kind of like a share cropper, which isn't exactly a slave.
Jun 7 2013 2:47AM
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T.MARTIN
Posts: 1333 - Karma: 62
You give him clothes, buy him coffee and give him what you can. I'd say you're just a nice guy and one of his friends :)
Jun 7 2013 2:57AM
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*ninja*
Posts: 2108 - Karma: 1,143
yes.
Jun 7 2013 3:24AM
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Tinga
Posts: 11349 - Karma: 2,333
how about you treat him like a halfway decent human being and give him more than shitty coffee for driving your lazy ass around. you don;t have to give him actual cash but it would be nice if you could set him up for a job interview or find some place for him to live.

does he actually have a valid driver's license? you may want to check that out. I'm sure he can drive just fine but if he is homeless his license is probably expired.
Jun 7 2013 3:25AM
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feihlination
Posts: 8356 - Karma: 1,084
^^yeah, do what your mom says right here.


obviously, youre helping him ten times more than most other people he mets.

morally, its also as fine as it gets since its an agreement between two (kind of) adult, independent and free persons. cant argue with that on an objective basis.
Jun 7 2013 6:37AM
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Turkelton
Posts: 2829 - Karma: 8,558
NWCAMO is the biggest troll on here. You sir, have been trolled
Jun 7 2013 6:47AM
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TannerBalls
Posts: 3197 - Karma: 1,310
I give him starbucks coffee.
Jun 7 2013 10:07AM
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TannerBalls
Posts: 3197 - Karma: 1,310
Also, I'm not sure if he has a valid drivers license but he used to drive before he lived on the streets.
Jun 7 2013 10:08AM
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Edgar_Allen_Poe
Posts: 24 - Karma: 44
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Jun 7 2013 11:23AM
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TechnoPotamus
Posts: 11626 - Karma: 3,522
i don't know what to make of this thread, but i'm laughing so....


carry on OP, carry on

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Jun 7 2013 11:43AM
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danbrown
Posts: 11939 - Karma: 21,826
steves middle name starts with S
Jun 7 2013 11:55AM
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coolflash8
Posts: 3171 - Karma: 2,048
Alpha as fuck
Jun 7 2013 11:55AM
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roddy116
Posts: 10627 - Karma: 7,423
i like this thread.
Jun 7 2013 11:59AM
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Auzy
Posts: 569 - Karma: 1,827
Yeah your definitely winning! I think I need to find my own hobo mow
Jun 7 2013 12:06PM
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Phil-X-
Posts: 7205 - Karma: 14,399
So would you call yourself a Slave "Driver"??




HA




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Jun 7 2013 12:09PM
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BigScaryLarry
Posts: 1448 - Karma: 2,732
i agree that trying to get this guy a job or a new cardboard box to live in would be nice too
Jun 7 2013 12:24PM
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Static
Posts: 8553 - Karma: 4,089
Do you pay property taxes? Does he live in a public park?
Jun 7 2013 12:54PM
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.SHAGGY.
Posts: 1068 - Karma: 3,280
inb4 OPs car gets stolen
Jun 7 2013 12:59PM
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mowglii
Posts: 545 - Karma: 339
Just be careful not to let dirty mike and the boys in your car.
Jun 7 2013 1:06PM
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Blindsurfer
Posts: 2252 - Karma: 2,791
why would you let a homeless man into your car. homeless people smell so bad.
Jun 7 2013 1:10PM
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Spinoza
Posts: 12763 - Karma: 3,846
this is amazing
Jun 7 2013 1:14PM
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CheddarJack
Posts: 5203 - Karma: 7,380
Do you just give him random clothes or does he pick your cotton?





I'm sorry that's awful. I just couldn't resist.
Jun 7 2013 1:15PM
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.frenchy
Posts: 18221 - Karma: 12,323
Lost it.
Jun 7 2013 1:39PM
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Kazabazua
Posts: 3529 - Karma: 1,128
I feel like your trying to pull some standup comedy shit online right now.
Jun 7 2013 1:49PM
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Joebin
Posts: 1664 - Karma: 867
I wish I had cool bums around my town like that. All the ones here just try and get free shit from all the drunk college kids. Funny story I actually kinda got to know one and he would tell me all the people that were dicks to him and he'd say "Go rev your engine at that one!" and hed point to the car of the person who was a dick. Im sure its just cause he was on meth, but he thought it was fucking hilarious. Then one day he left and gave me a 6 page long paper about how everyone in the city was a dick and his thoughts on life and the people who actually gave him money. He said in it that he was going to Seattle actually to try and befriend some rich fuck and rob them blind, oh how I miss Jamal.
Jun 7 2013 2:03PM
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Z.J.H.
Posts: 842 - Karma: 1,541
Just make sure you sell him before Lincoln wins the war.
Jun 7 2013 2:07PM
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SKI.ING
Posts: 2695 - Karma: 2,535
I wanna know how he gets back each day. Does he drive back with you and wait around until you're off work?
Jun 7 2013 3:09PM
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TannerBalls
Posts: 3197 - Karma: 1,310
Jamal drives me home everyday. When I'm working he just wanders around and does bum stuff. He meets me back at my car at 430 everyday, if he's not there I just leave but he is usually back waiting for me because he doesn't want to be stranded on the wrong side of lake Washington. He doesn't smell bad because I give him my old clothes and stuff. Also after work we sometimes hangout. To answer another question, my insurance covers other driver's driving my car so if he crashed my car I would be fine insurance wise.
Jun 7 2013 3:45PM
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casual
Posts: 6712 - Karma: 6,748
NWCamo for member of the month.
Jun 7 2013 3:46PM
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TannerBalls
Posts: 3197 - Karma: 1,310
Also look for us if you are in Seattle. I'm on 405 everday in a white subaru outback with a saga sticker.
Jun 7 2013 3:46PM
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TannerBalls
Posts: 3197 - Karma: 1,310
(I'm the white guy with the black slave driving)
Jun 7 2013 3:47PM
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Mag
Posts: 8155 - Karma: 14,809
You're doing it wrong.

Get him to carry you to work, or even better set up a gang of 10 slaves, obtain a sled, and get there 10 times as fast.
Jun 7 2013 3:49PM
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Miomo
Posts: 4302 - Karma: 14,133
It's all fun and games until someone (you) gets their face eaten off.
Jun 7 2013 4:02PM
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Joebin
Posts: 1664 - Karma: 867
Then start a homeless dogsled race and compete with them, theyre already used to sleeping in the snow so it shouldnt be an issue. Then when The summer time comes around you can start a homeless boxing league. Have people bet on it and take 10% of the winnings.
Jun 7 2013 4:06PM
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