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Roommates

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Sketchy_P
Posts: 445 - Karma: 103
Post and stories or a bad experience with your roommates or roommate because as i got to college i thought my roommate was chill and normal but it took some time until i noticed all the strange things he does he sure proved me wrong. Any funny stories you guys have or any fights hah post here
Apr 11 2013 12:08PM
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Rparr
Posts: 5562 - Karma: 45,585
I started smoking buds in my dorm roon when I broke my foot.

Through a smokebuddy, under my comforter.

It never smells, I never smoke when he's around, and yet my roomate still complains. Roomates can be tricky
Apr 11 2013 12:16PM
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CluckaChuck
Posts: 1541 - Karma: 734
I live in a pretty chill house. I get along with all my roomates. We tend to wake each other up with firecrackers a little to often though.
Apr 11 2013 12:19PM
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errrka
Posts: 2261 - Karma: 6,058
my roomate is hansel
Apr 11 2013 12:29PM
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EC-Skier
Posts: 3899 - Karma: 668
my roommate only listens to Lil B and Cheek Keef
he flexes his $300 gucci belt
wears a $300 silver chain
brags about his designer everything
eats his scabs
and is bipolar
Apr 11 2013 12:37PM
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skiierman
Posts: 28699 - Karma: -5,563
It sounds like you're 12 years old trying to play a Gameboy past your bedtime. I guarantee you that shit stank. There's no possible way to make a cigarette odorless especially in a small fucking dorm room... under your covers. Way to not only be a shitty roommate but a scumbag.
Apr 11 2013 12:43PM
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Mr.Sloth
Posts: 5091 - Karma: 13,469
You sound like a fucker
Apr 11 2013 12:45PM
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Turner.
Posts: 1987 - Karma: 11,892
I don't really know how to explain this one properly, but I thought it was fucking hilarious. Maybe it's just one of those things that was super funny in the moment, I dunno.

Anyway, yesterday my roommate was gaming (HON or Dota or some shit)and I hear him say something to the effect of brb to his buddy's on steam or whatever. Then he gets up and goes into the bathroom - we share a hotel room as our dorm room, for reference. He's in there and I hear the toilet seat go down and whatever, I'm not paying attention, but then all of a sudden he unleashes the most violent shit sound I've ever heard. Like he fucking ripped one hard; it sounded all splattery and shit. So I'm like giggling to myself at this point, and he lets off at least 3 more of these outrageous shit-eruptions, all in the span of about 30 seconds. Then next thing I know the toilet flushes and he's out and back at his computer. The entire event took no more than a minute and yet I'm confident he emptied his entire colon into the toilet.

So that was all funny to me and I just quietly loled to myself for a bit and forgot about it. Then I go into the bathroom later on and I see that inside the toilet there's fully undigested noodles from pho or pad thai or whatever it was that he had eaten. I realized then that he had been violently shitting out noodles earlier, and that the results of his furious defecations were still there in the bowl.

Asians, man. Buncha weirdos.
Apr 11 2013 12:45PM
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KEVTRON
Posts: 3545 - Karma: 1,222
I call my Housemates roomates which some people find weird I guess but unfortunately a few weeks ago my "housemate" decided to put a bullet in his head on the porch of our house about 8ft away from me through a wall/window. Heard a loud CRACK (a gunshot is a pretty distinct sound). Immediatly knew what it was. Look left out the window to see him fall out of the chair he was sitting in. Run to the front door to see someone standing in the driveway with a look of shock on their face(about to jump into a car) see my housemate laying on the ground with blood everywhere. "HOLY FUCK SOMEONE JUST SHOT TOM" Lock the fuckin door throw my shoes on expecting people to rush the house if I had to bail quick. Call 911 cannot even talk to the dispatcher with how in shock I am. Car takes off, finally get myself together enough to say my name, address, and what happened. Dispatcher asks if I know CPR, look out the window "Fuck that man I cant do that shit theres so much blood." He says OK can you at least go check for vitals. finally unlock door and go outside and check vitals to see my housemate with a revolver on the ground next to him kind of like spazing out very softly, almost like a seizure. I watched as my housemate choked on his own blood until the Police arrived. Police were fucking assholes. The paramedics finally arrived and took him away. They didnt bother cleaning up the blood and left their garbage for shit they had used which all ended up sitting on the porch for about 2 days. Not a day goes by I dont think about what happened and I hope to god noone ever has to see what I saw that night. Terrible experience being out on my own for the first time in my life. RIP Tom, idk what the fuck you were thinking about that night.
Apr 11 2013 12:48PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51652 - Karma: 162,279
Great thread OP. You sound like a blast to live with
Apr 11 2013 12:49PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,272
i got very lucky with my roommate but most of my friends have pretty hellish situations
Apr 11 2013 12:55PM
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first_rodeo
Posts: 2385 - Karma: 7,781

i was in a tripled double (dorm)   freshman year

Roommate 1.  Ghana born devoute christian,  extremely nice-- but like a priest

he would use my shit w/o asking------   clothes, shoes, food

a)           wrecked 2 new pairs of jordans in mud

b)           tried jumping in front of a car for attention then told CAMPO to come up into our dorm at 3am   and talk.

They see my $200+   double perc ROOR and take it      HE DOESNT CARE

c)         Would always  study until 6am  then slam the door and make so much noise everytime he came in.     

d)         would get so mad that my bong ripping self would do 2x better than him on every test

e)          He was a virgin by choice (every girl throws themselves at him)  

                but would have ugly black chicks to come over and be in the friend zone and be incredibly rude.

f)            walked around naked 24-7 puting lotion on his body

Roommate 2.

super cocky political science major:   has meet and talked with 3 presidents like 8 times

a)              would be loud as he could to get me caught smoking buds

b)              would make the biggest messes

ME AS A ROOMMATE:

i was on top bunk and always pushed naked sweaty girls off the bunk and fall onto roommate below

he got crotch to the face once, i heard the wet wet and saw him run to wash off

literally did nothing but Smoke my bongs in that closet of a room

Apr 11 2013 1:09PM
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snowdon
Posts: 2480 - Karma: 391
Holy shit dude...I am so sorry. Damn.
Apr 11 2013 2:40PM
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first_rodeo
Posts: 2385 - Karma: 7,781

Prayers

Apr 11 2013 2:44PM
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yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
I woke up to my drunk roommate peeing in the garbage can at 3 in the morning on a Thursday. I ask him "Yo, Erik. Are you peeing in the garbage can?". He doesn't say anything. "Yo, Erik. Do you know where you are?".
He replies, "yeah", finishes his business and rolls into bed. I just gave up at that point. =

That's the only interesting roommate story I have. We're both pretty respectful of each other and our room.
Apr 11 2013 2:57PM
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first_rodeo
Posts: 2385 - Karma: 7,781

Current:

few rugby players went to our schools 24-7 Cafeteria after long day--night binge

My buddy waiting in line behind some Campos getting coffee

Pulls down pants and pisses on the display case.

Apr 11 2013 3:04PM
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newnewschool
Posts: 400 - Karma: 439
the funniest is when a roommate doesn't know you're home and starts singing loudly
Apr 11 2013 3:13PM
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miroz
Posts: 10333 - Karma: 3,945
Holy fuck. +vibes man, that's fucking insane.
Apr 11 2013 3:18PM
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Rparr
Posts: 5562 - Karma: 45,585
Can you read? I'm not smoking cigarettes.

Also, try reading up on what a smoke buddy is. That shit's the real deal. I bet you wouldn't want to go outside to smoke if you lived on the 21st floor in a dorm.

Basically he gets irritated that the room smells hardly of weed once in a while. That would be like me getting mad that he's drinking, which would be fucking stupid.
Apr 11 2013 4:29PM
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appa
Posts: 2249 - Karma: 1,739
my roommate makes really breathy and vocal sounds in his sleep/all the time. i don't want to ask about it because i'm afraid it's a respiratory problem or something.. idk just don't want to offend the guy. i've been sleeping with earplugs in every night for the past 8 months lol. he lets me smoke in the room/be my weird self so it's cool. chews with his mouth open which is a huge fucking no go for me though. the other thing is that he doesn't really talk to anyone, and it's odd getting asked who my roommate is 8 months into the school year by people on our floor in the dorms.
Apr 11 2013 4:59PM
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first_rodeo
Posts: 2385 - Karma: 7,781
Click for larger image

but really tho
Vape all day and everyone would use my vape........... RA's didnt understand what vape was

i had 2-3 large bongs in my room at a time............ until my roommate got me in trouble
then i started hiding bongs



If you're not a coughing AMmmie,         you can rip bong and blow out window.... iron lungs



My roommates understood the fact, i was the Alpha male, even tho i had top bunk
they knew i brought a quarter pound from home, and never allowed anyone to pinch


Apr 11 2013 5:05PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51652 - Karma: 162,279
^

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Apr 11 2013 5:07PM
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first_rodeo
Posts: 2385 - Karma: 7,781
of shrooms
Click for larger image

IMG]626536[/IMG]

10 Tabs of like Acid
Apr 11 2013 5:14PM
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gengar.
Posts: 1042 - Karma: 1,641
Ive always wondered if im the only one that fucking hate's having roommates.
Apr 11 2013 5:20PM
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skiierman
Posts: 28699 - Karma: -5,563
Who the fuck refers to smoking weed as "ripping buds"?

You would be such a shitty roommate... maybe you should take a note from one of the roommate stories that was posted earlier... I don't feel like I have to tell you which one. It should be obvious.
Apr 11 2013 6:12PM
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Campeador
Posts: 7516 - Karma: -1,227
I've been lucky for the most part. I did have a roommate who was a sleep walker and that was quite funny. He would often leave his clothes strewn about on the floor of his room, and would sometimes get up out of bed, and start pissing on a piles of clothes in his room while he was sleep walking. He would then sometimes wear the clothes he had pissed on and wonder why he smelt weird.

Then I also had two other roommates who got along fine with me but absolutely hated each other. I get back one day and there is literally blood everywhere, I thought one had murdered the other but it just turned out that they had beaten the shit out of each other in every single room of the apartment (except mine thank god). Needless to say I got sick of that shit and was hardly ever around.
Apr 11 2013 6:15PM
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11954 - Karma: 12,298
You think someone should kill themselves because they meet your definition of a shitty roommate?

I would tell you to take a break from the computer and go outside, but you might melt or burst into flame or something...
Apr 11 2013 6:26PM
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.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
He's just projecting his own suicidal thoughts onto others as a coping mechanism. I mean, have you seen what he looks like? I'd want to kill myself too.
Apr 11 2013 6:31PM
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skiierman
Posts: 28699 - Karma: -5,563
Whoa man, you're fucked up if that's what you thought. Maybe you need to lay off smoking buds under the covers for a bit...

Also ignore that dinosaur icon kid. He's pissed off that his ass is still sore from that last fucking I gave him.
Apr 11 2013 6:34PM
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11954 - Karma: 12,298
Like Shaun White but with a more "it's not rape if I yell surprise" sort of feel.
Apr 11 2013 6:34PM
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Rparr
Posts: 5562 - Karma: 45,585
Hahaha man you're really reaching for an arguement, aren't you? didn't like that I called your poor reading comprehension out so you criticize how I state that I smoke weed?

If you think I'm a ridiculous, rude roomate, you should read steezecoast23's post. THAT's taking it too far.

Get fucked, angry internet troll.
Apr 11 2013 6:35PM
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first_rodeo
Posts: 2385 - Karma: 7,781

didnt embed

Click for larger image

Apr 11 2013 6:40PM
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skiierman
Posts: 28699 - Karma: -5,563
Angry internet troll?


Jesus Christ can we make mass murder legal already? It's the next logical step after letting the n00bz take over because everyone was too busy being accepting and politically correct pussies.

This is what happens when you ban the good members for no good reason. You get little shit heads like this that come in and clog up every good thread with their 4chan forum lingo and their ignorant, little kid BS.
Apr 11 2013 6:44PM
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first_rodeo
Posts: 2385 - Karma: 7,781

Moral of the story

theres certain people you cant live with, even best bros

at the time i HATED THOSE FUCKERS

but now that we dont share a closet dorm room,,  they are chill guys: 

Apr 11 2013 6:45PM
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.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
Absolutely. Gingers would definitely be the first to go, though. Are you sure you want to take that chance?
Apr 11 2013 6:48PM
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EC-Skier
Posts: 3899 - Karma: 668
"like acid"
well thats scary haha
Apr 12 2013 9:06AM
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first_rodeo
Posts: 2385 - Karma: 7,781

take a tab then going to Marketing 433

I AM THE WORST ROOMMATE NS

Apr 12 2013 9:36AM
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Phil-X-
Posts: 7205 - Karma: 14,399
Holy shit, thats wild as fuck.... Do you know why he did it? Leave a note? How are you and all your roomates holding up?
Apr 12 2013 9:48AM
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stizzle
Posts: 371 - Karma: 623
Nope. I hate having roomates. I lucked out and lived with a friend for two years in college who also hated having roomates. Actually worked out surprisingly good.
Apr 12 2013 10:20AM
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KEVTRON
Posts: 3545 - Karma: 1,222
He was doing alot of drugs, Lost his job, owed alot of people money, and was having problems with his girl. Got to be too much for him, started stealing our shit and selling it and I think at that point where he had to steal from his friends to fund his problems, he was just too embarassed and humiliated to go on anymore. Called up his dealer to meet him at the house probably saying he had the money, as soon as the kid got out of the car he shot himself in front of him(the guy in the driveway with the car). No note, just a few facebook messages sent out to people giving his belongings to them. As for the rest of us, we're holding up for the time being. There has been some problems with how everyone is dealing with things, but time heals all wounds.
Apr 12 2013 12:07PM
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