Member of the Month

KilaTsunami
October, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

Found out who egged my house..

profile picture
Woodsy15
Posts: 239 - Karma: 383
So last year my house was egged 6 weekends in a row out of pure enjoyment on their end and was an absolute bitch to clean up. Finally found out who did it and now I'm turning to NS for some ideas to get them back.

inb4 fight them (they're females) and repost.
Mar 13 2013 9:40PM
373 80
profile picture
Mr.Huck
Posts: 6096 - Karma: 14,896
They would literally have to throw away the covers, the mattress and anything else it touched. It's not like anyone is going to let you walk into their house with rubber gloves on, carrying a bottle of skunk urine.

This is more likely to be a night time assault. There are a million different ways to get the smell inside their house. That is all you need.
Mar 13 2013 11:03PM
1 0
profile picture
NickSki.
Posts: 2009 - Karma: 61
Youre from Ottawa? let me in on this egging ill help out
Mar 13 2013 11:04PM
0 0
profile picture
spliff.Life
Posts: 7847 - Karma: 1,549
sugar in gas tank,  use gasoline to burn a giant dick in their lawn, fishing line trip wires, saran wrap their doors shut, spray paint their home or car or mailbox, smear shit on their stuff, or i mean you could just man up and burn down their house
Mar 13 2013 11:06PM
0 0
profile picture
Joebin
Posts: 1664 - Karma: 867
The next step would obviously be throw live chickens at there house.
Mar 13 2013 11:08PM
4 0
profile picture
whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,103
actually do this:
get bucket, gasoline, styrofoam, a big stick (baseball bat or something like that)
pour gas into bucket
put styrofoam in there
muddle the styrofoam with the stick until the styrofoam can't absorb anymore gas. by then it should be like a goo
lay the goo down on their driveways into a penis shape
light it! it will burn forever



Mar 13 2013 11:08PM
3 0
profile picture
Snowgoner
Posts: 5047 - Karma: 964
you should gather a few of your friends, put white sheets over your heads, and burn a cross in their yard
Mar 13 2013 11:12PM
9 1
profile picture
grown-ninja
Posts: 3031 - Karma: 175
Forceable Sodomy
Mar 13 2013 11:15PM
0 0
profile picture
richard.
Posts: 873 - Karma: 55
Put a mattress in their pool
Mar 13 2013 11:17PM
0 0
profile picture
CaptainDiabetes
Posts: 224 - Karma: 161

or better....

Mar 13 2013 11:18PM
0 0
profile picture
myllhouse
Posts: 1064 - Karma: 2,157
yea, make them suck your dick and have babies
Mar 13 2013 11:19PM
0 0
profile picture
whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,103
you only need a little gas for a LOT of styrofoam

Mar 13 2013 11:20PM
1 0
profile picture
bnewbs6
Posts: 1919 - Karma: 1,463
Please do the water one. So funny.
Mar 13 2013 11:34PM
0 0
profile picture
Jesse.White
Posts: 450 - Karma: 754
Simple yet fucking awsome. With weed killer round up or some thing write a good slur in the lawn. "vaginas" "Cunts" "Balls" and if they're not virgins write the name of the guy who took their virginity. this is good because the lawn will stay like that for some time and its low work.
Mar 13 2013 11:44PM
1 0
profile picture
YoungWookiee
Posts: 681 - Karma: 394
if they have a wooden porch leave a plastic container with a bunch of holes on the lid with about 6 eggs in it under there porch. and also egg there houses and everything else
Mar 13 2013 11:47PM
0 0
profile picture
.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,485
ya, so hard to buy new sheets
Mar 13 2013 11:50PM
1 0
profile picture
Noha
Posts: 1281 - Karma: 2,684
just rape em
Mar 13 2013 11:53PM
0 0
profile picture
grown-ninja
Posts: 3031 - Karma: 175
No... Make them suck your dick and get rabies
Mar 13 2013 11:54PM
1 0
profile picture
_Garagely_
Posts: 1948 - Karma: 3,246
Get a shitload of crickets from a pet store and release them into their house.
Mar 13 2013 11:57PM
2 0
profile picture
armadaski44
Posts: 481 - Karma: 15
yeah thatll show em, OP can do no wrong with this option.
Mar 14 2013 12:07AM
2 0
profile picture
Kirsakid
Posts: 1793 - Karma: 126
Wait OP is an Ottawa boy let me help man
Mar 14 2013 12:08AM
0 0
profile picture
crab_pretzel
Posts: 3919 - Karma: 622
I too am the son of a teacher, although somebody egged our house AND slashed two tires of one of our car. we actually found out who it was with like 95% certainty I wish I had come to ns for help
Mar 14 2013 12:16AM
0 0
profile picture
Spic-N-SpaN
Posts: 2002 - Karma: 1,465
Get a fuck ton of rabbits and release them in there house and if you get enough rabbits they'll reproduce faster then they can get rid of them then they'll have to move and sell the rabbit infested house for way less then they bought it for and with out making much money off the sale they'll have to move into the slummy neighbor hood and since environment and people you interact with has a huge impact on you as you grow up they'll never espire to anything great and probably turn into drugys and get pregnant with crack babies and since they cant afford to move out of that neighbor hood there crack baby kid will be raised in that same environment and the cycle will just keep continuing and you've effectively tarnished that families lineage with a bunch of rabbits.
Mar 14 2013 12:19AM
3 1
profile picture
.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
The fact that OP made this thread tells me he has no intention of retaliating, but wants other people to think he will so he feels cool. If he was really going to do something, he would have done it already and then posted about it after the fact.
Mar 14 2013 12:28AM
5 17
profile picture
PigBenis
Posts: 182 - Karma: 99
great detective work, detective.
Mar 14 2013 1:09AM
0 0
profile picture
Jeebus.
Posts: 4904 - Karma: 5,822
Cool, op. You must be quite the man if a bunch of chicks are repeatedly egging your house.
Mar 14 2013 1:16AM
3 2
profile picture
-MK-
Posts: 3253 - Karma: 5,332
Ask their fathers for permission to marry them so they have to have a really awkward conversation with their parents. I'm serious
Mar 14 2013 1:31AM
1 0
profile picture
cope+
Posts: 763 - Karma: 870
Trip wires outside their doors with fishing line +k to dat guy
Mar 14 2013 1:46AM
0 0
profile picture
Parks.
Posts: 5612 - Karma: 1,093
AR6rider, telling it like it is
Mar 14 2013 1:57AM
0 0
profile picture
J-LUVrunsthegame
Posts: 224 - Karma: 29
the only thing to do is to pee in there butts
Mar 14 2013 2:00AM
0 1
profile picture
Ribss.
Posts: 3442 - Karma: 3,344
I was waiting for someone to say that.
Mar 14 2013 2:01AM
0 0
profile picture
RalphLauren.
Posts: 710 - Karma: 106
shmeere poop on the bottom of their doorknob
Mar 14 2013 2:08AM
0 0
profile picture
.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,485
where butts?
Mar 14 2013 8:14AM
4 0
profile picture
theBearJew
Posts: 10951 - Karma: 15,633
dont egg their house, cause they already did that. You have to think of something better that won't make them think it was you.

spraypaint on their car that they are sluts, whores, have the clap, and they have a dick.
Mar 14 2013 9:07AM
0 0
profile picture
VT_FLO
Posts: 3806 - Karma: 147
Fuck their dads.
Mar 14 2013 9:09AM
2 0
profile picture
theBearJew
Posts: 10951 - Karma: 15,633
scratch that.

if you have their phone numbers, post craigslist ads about something everyone wants for dirt cheap (sex, cars, their house, iPhone, virginity, etc.) and post multiple ads from different computers linked to a randomly created e-mail address. Then they will be flooded with texts, calls, etc.
Mar 14 2013 9:13AM
0 0
profile picture
midwestpowhunter
Posts: 2198 - Karma: 189
Call there houses while u know they aren't home. Pretend to be planned parenthood asking about there abortion recovery. Call house pretending to be another parent of a trashy kid in school and tell their parents u caught them doing meth in your basement while having unprotected sex with your son. Use weed killer on their lawn. Put limberger cheese on their engine manifold. Put a gallon of milk in the trunk of their car. Do something different to each of them
Mar 14 2013 9:14AM
0 0
profile picture
Benedetto.
Posts: 2526 - Karma: 64
Hahaha couldn't k+ any higher
Mar 14 2013 11:19AM
0 1
profile picture
SwagasaurusRex
Posts: 635 - Karma: 333
This is nice and sinister.... So I am assuming it is still winter where you live right now. So lets start off with this, you will need peanut butter and saran wrap. You know how if you put normal peanut butter in the fridge it basically turns into a rock? And you know how hard it is to get saran wrap off of a car? You will go cover the cars with peanut butter and then put the saran wrap over it. Wrap that car tight as you can. Also if it is summer where you live, simply drop a few jolly ranchers on the car and allow them to melt in the hot sun, they will not be removable from the car without taking the paint with it, or you can spend hours pouring hot water over them and eventually they will slowly go away.

Also, pee in their butts.
Mar 14 2013 11:48AM
4 0
profile picture
skierman
Posts: 8334 - Karma: 7,757
Give their tampon collection a slight dusting with chili powder.
Mar 14 2013 11:57AM
6 0
profile picture
Deluge
Posts: 4401 - Karma: 805
^^ That is fucking genius
Mar 14 2013 12:09PM
0 0
profile picture
Deluge
Posts: 4401 - Karma: 805
Therons post
Mar 14 2013 12:12PM
0 0
profile picture
MNS
Posts: 5386 - Karma: 3,241
Pour water in their gas tanks. Fake spray paint dicks on their cars. Plant dope in their lockers next school search
Mar 14 2013 12:24PM
0 0
profile picture
CaelW
Posts: 400 - Karma: 108
Get a potato gun and shoot dildos through their windows. Or water balloons filled with paint and piss
Mar 14 2013 12:26PM
0 0
profile picture
SkierPT
Posts: 2177 - Karma: 4,720
Calling their house and leaving a message for the parents would be great. Just have to make sure they don't delete the voicemail first
Mar 14 2013 1:53PM
0 0
profile picture
washparkdub
Posts: 266 - Karma: 66
First you egg their homes, then dump bags flower over everything, finally salt their ground so nothing ever grows.

Owned.
Mar 14 2013 1:55PM
1 0
profile picture
90053
Posts: 2565 - Karma: 3,728
lay eggs in there garden in a suitably warm place so they incubate, then your carnivorous reptilian offspring will reproduce and then eat them and their families
Mar 14 2013 1:59PM
0 0
profile picture
Cotter
Posts: 2546 - Karma: 849
Click for larger image

But seriously, confront them and make them tell their parents what they did and have them apologize to your parents and make them clean your house for 4 hours a week for 3 weeks
Mar 14 2013 2:11PM
2 0
profile picture
DGski
Posts: 3491 - Karma: 2,328
.. or maybe he is looking for ideas of what to do like he said

Yeah I'm gonna go with the second one
Mar 14 2013 2:36PM
0 0
profile picture
Turd.Ferguson
Posts: 1437 - Karma: 2,713
pour egg yoke in their gatorade they'll be blowing chunks and shitting bricks meanwhile watch this clip http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nv7Ts4v5_Bs
Mar 14 2013 3:17PM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-5)