recruting team members for street cred skis

name: Kyle Andrew Warrnefeltz
eye color: Blue
heart rate: N/A
lengh: 5foot 11inches
girth:
sponcers:N/A
reason you ski: For the fun
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): Urban
favorite season to ski: Fun, jesus christ i told you once
music: Rock, some rap
anything eles: Street Cred is so hot right now






holy shit!!!111!1! he has more hten one namne??>?? omggg!! what a sux0rz@!! LOL

I wrote the words to this song on the back of a photograph
Behind your back it goes
A little something like this is way to big to miss....

keep in mind, be sure to make your profiles rediculious. i want close to no seriousness.

name: Archibald C. MacAurthur
eye color: blue
heart rate: 85bpm
lengh: 7''
girth: Big enough
sponcers: Stret Creed Skis and the Springs building locker room
reason you ski: Snow
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): backcountry rock jibs
favorite season to ski: Snow
music: Fatlip
anything eles: I'm taller than you

-TAK, PPPhD

Name: Pat McCrotch
Eye color: Flouresent pink
Heart rate: 40 (resting), 120 (in bed)
Lengh: 6... feet or inchs... you be the judge
Girth: Lost count...
Sponcers: Burton
Reason you ski: Pickup chicks
Fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails):Backyard (playhouse railing)
Favorite season to ski: Winter
Music: Bjork rocks my socks
Anything else: F*ck parabolic, straight skis own!


Go big or go home

you know what? this is going nowhere. with submissions like these, i wouldnt be suprised if street cred skis ended up going teamless.

what i REALLY want you to do it to send in a short story about yourself, and what skiing is to you. do NOT be serious, be humorous.

name: Daniel Robert Hansen P.H.D.
eye color: clearish
heart rate: 75 (before cig) 105 (after cig)
lengh: 6'2'
girth: 32 inches
sponcers: trojan, titliest, puma
reason you ski: cause they dont let me bring sleds up the lifts
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): urban rails
favorite season to ski: spring
music: tromboner
anything eles: raise the titanic





free ipods for everyone!!!

so fill this out:
name: Neva Sellot
eye color: white
heart rate: 34bpm
lengh: 8 units
girth: 2.3 wide
sponcers: red racer sleds, greenpeace, visine
reason you ski: to keep a kid off drugs
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): your mom's backyard is a great place to rail
favorite season to ski: when it's cold enuf for the gondola cuz it's easier to smoking drugs on the way up.
music: fuck yeah
anything eles: if you're gonna pack a rail, use a shovel


*all hail to the mighty gods of snow*

name: Ben Dover
eye color: White, I'm blind and use my ski poles as seeing eye canes.
heart rate: 3 bpm
lengh: 6 inches
girth: 32 inches
sponcers: Seeing eye dogs of america, Oakley.
reason you ski: Ski poles are more fashionable than those red and white canes most blind people use.
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): I get hit by cars if I hit urban rails sicne I am blind.
favorite season to ski: Spring, the rain makes me look hot, hair all wet and my shirt sticks to my chest and rippeling muscles..
music: Anything by Ray Charles
anything eles: Just because I am blind doesnt mean I dont know u are waving your hands in front of my face and making funny faces at me.

_______________________________
What is the colour of a mirror?

'Fear is your only god' - Zach Dela Rocha

NS hockey pool champion: 2003

www.theeasyrider.com

name: whobitchacockoff
eye color: shartruze
heart rate: 1bpm
lengh: thats a rather personal question
girth: 56 inches
sponcers: ky personal lubricant
reason you ski: to get the women
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): back yard golf cart jumps
favorite season to ski: mud season
music: kids on the block
anything eles: nothing

GMM_Represent

so fill this out:
name: Eric Pollard
eye color: zebra
heart rate: Lance Armstrong (see also: dead)
lengh: 13.2 inches
girth: diamter, 8 inches
sponcers: jesus, dr. sayus, lincoln/ford/mercury, zeus, 9 out of 10 dentists
reason you ski: weed hoes and bitches, and bling
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): gutters of neighbors houses
favorite season to ski: smarch
music: gregorian chant and tabernacle choir mixed over some oakenfold with some Looyd banks lyrics
anything eles: when the world is mine i shall make sure your death is quick and painless.
__________________
You know the Nazis had pieces of flair that they made the Jews wear.

once back when i was a fetus i was aborted. it didn't hurt at all, but i was also high on life at the time. - thisangelicrage
its not rape....its surprise sex. you wake up and SURPRISE you had sex with me haha - huckster989
liberals think killing babies can be both fun and profitable, while conservatives think killing foreigners can be both fun and profitable - ice-is-scary

so fill this out:
name: Droo Pecock
eye color: Red (Im albino)
heart rate: ranges from 1.3 bpm to 1000 bpm
lengh: .5 mm
girth:
sponcers: to many to name
reason you ski: Because I rule
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): I choose street skiing
favorite season to ski: most likely summer, the pavement is usually slicker
music: im to cool for music
anything eles: I rule





Get a free ipod, its pretty easy.
click here

so fill this out:
name:
eye color: Kinda like a tig'as
heart rate: 210 a min
lengh: 3.5'
girth: 1'
sponcers: Hardcore
reason you ski: Cause i'm gangsta
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): fuck rails i slay the SIDEWALK
favorite season to ski: I ski year round Bitch
music: fitty, nuff said
anything eles:Cause i'm GANGSTA bitch

name: Jed Mayflower
eye color: Dont know (my mullet is always in the way)
heart rate: 30 bpm resting
lengh: 140
girth: 25 inches
sponcers: gator lawn trackters
reason you ski: so you can all gaze in aww at the awsomeness of my mullet
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): backyard ( no rails in urban )
favorite season to ski: summer
music: ones with banjos
anything eles: Im 34 i live with my mother and her 2 boyfriends, I'd like one day to have teeth, and I wanna have a friend.


do the chickens have large talons?

name: Osama binladen
eye color: i live in a cave....
heart rate: i live in a cave...
lengh: floppy =2inches erectile= max out at 4inch
girth: yes please
sponcers: chermans toilet paper, oscar mior wierner
reason you ski: i live in a cave...
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): sadam's rial
favorite season to ski: i live in a cave...
music: mostly britny and avril
anything eles: i live in a fucking cave!



-Nick Martini
Stept Productions
go buy 'to whom it may concern'
Liberty skis
So what?..... So lets dance!

name: TOM-e shimoko
eye color: brown like poop
heart rate: 69? 6969696969
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
3 weeks, 6 days!!!!

name: TOM-e shimoko
eye color: brown like poop
heart rate: 69? 6969696969
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
3 weeks, 6 days!!!!

name: Thom 'The bomb' Savery
eye color: The same as your shit. Brown.
heart rate: Faster than a humming bird... the doc says i should by all rights be dead (at least half of that was true...)
lengh: Ask your grandma's daughter (thats your mom)
girth: See above.
sponcers: Your mom pays me nicely, but if it wasnt for all the empties i collect from my town id be broke.
reason you ski: because all the cool kids are doing it, espically the ones from Manotick.
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): Who care? If i can hit it I will.
favorite season to ski: Your mom's offseason. Thats right, your mom's a sport.
music: what ever the shit your mom plays when im pretending she is a ship and im filling her with seamen.
anything eles: I would make a valued memeber to the team because if you dont let me on the team, your mom will never give you any money again. Thats right. I pull all the strings.

-Thom Savery
please pardon the cacography
--->CCR*
'Humanity needs to stop having relations with it's mother' -a freind on Oedipus Rex.

lengh: tallnezzzzz
girth: i respect my body...my temple
sponcers: lite brite
reason you ski: to pic up hot guys
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails):back yard railz
favorite season to ski: juneember
music: ricco swave (gerardo)
anything eles: i would be gr8 for STREET DRED SKEEZ because i roll with staraight up circ de solay steze
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
3 weeks, 6 days!!!!

name: Skeletor
eye color: Burnt Sienna
heart rate: 87 miles per foot
lengh: medium
girth: phat booty style
sponcers: Enron, Bush's wood company, Defi Skis, Jesus, Aquafina, Josta.
reason you ski: for jesus and to prove to people that i am real.
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): no preference, but i like hanging out at the mall.
favorite season to ski: autumn and 4th of july and arbor day.
music: Depsche Mode, Weird Al Yankovic, Eminem, twisted sister
anything eles: I would like to say a stor-e on my favrite day on the ski slowpes. I had my twin tip skis on and i skied past this guy who was skiing on like 255 skis, like they were long and like he was like 'hey kid are those those skis that have the tails that are like the tips and you can ski backwayrds on them?' he asked me that and i looked at my homie, my homies name is Ernest Munsterlacta, and we both had bandanas in our pockets and we had oakley a frames on, and i looked deep into his oakley a frames and jsut shook my head like thinking like telepathicalallly like that this guy is a idiot, he just asked me if my twin tips were twin tips. So i was like 'yeah these are those skis that have the tail like the tips, pretty cool eh?' and the guy looked at me and was like 'fucking canadians' and just skied off and i was like weird. So i hit play on my ipod and was like jammin to some gangster hip hop, my favorite song, boyz in the hood by dynamite hack. then i busted my sag a little lower so my oakley 2 x 4 pants would make me look sick, and i did look sick. so then me and Ernest jetted down the hill and we were like flowing and looked really ill and people would like turn their heads and look at us and everyone was tapping poles with us and shit and it was sick. so we came up to the first jump in the park and like chilled up before the jump getting ready to go and like watched like 15 to 32 kids go off the jump and did liike stupid tricks like one kid did a 360 with no grab and shit and it was pretty weak and then he came around again and did like another 360. and then i was like 'hey ernest watch me' and we tapped poles and like i dropped in and did the sickest lu kain anyone watching had ever seen, like one kids head exploded. So then i just skied off and didn't even care how sick i just was and i came up to this flat bar rail and just slayed it, i thought i jsut did like a nosepress but Ernest said it looked corked so I claimed corked nose press, first person to do that trick in history so yeah thats pretty sick. but anyway, that was my best day on the slopse, i'm pretty sure it was a better day than anyone combined.




ALASKA PRIDE

shit, sorry, i just got an email and jesus has dropped me from his team, sorry for the misinformation. So i don't ski for him anymore but i also just got an email from the band Oasis and i ski for them now. so there is a spancer you can add to the list.



ALASKA PRIDE

This is one for fakieseven

so fill this out: Filling it out now
name: Will Wesson
eye color: green?
heart rate: on speed or not?
lengh: i dont want to talk about it
girth: ' '
sponcers: some films i do
reason you ski: skiing?
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): backyard sounds fun
favorite season to ski: what is this skiing stuff?
music: dance, moslty the river kind
anything eles: anyone want to be part of first 10 penatration bang?

well shit, jesus still totally wants me on his team. like last sunday i walked across this river to jesus' house and we had a barbeque man. me and jesus are tight. all my other spancers were there too, except that 10th dentist.
__________________
You know the Nazis had pieces of flair that they made the Jews wear.

once back when i was a fetus i was aborted. it didn't hurt at all, but i was also high on life at the time. - thisangelicrage
its not rape....its surprise sex. you wake up and SURPRISE you had sex with me haha - huckster989
liberals think killing babies can be both fun and profitable, while conservatives think killing foreigners can be both fun and profitable - ice-is-scary

^^ thanks andy you saved me time
I HATE NY PRODUCTIONS

name: Colby
eye color: Brown
heart rate: 55 bpm
length: 5'8'
girth: what?
sponcers: I hope street cred
reason you ski: To rawk out in pink one peace jump soots!!!!!!!!
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): backyard
favorite season to ski: summer, then i can hit up the shitty backyard rail
music: Beethoven
anything else: PLLLLLLZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!
________________________

name: McGroine, Grabbin
eye color: Red
heart rate: Machine gun style
lengh: minus 2 inches
girth: looks like the 0.5mm lead refills for ur pencils
sponcers: Harrys gay strip joint
reason you ski: To dry my dick after sex
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): any rail i can get my ass on
favorite season to ski: summer, so i can rip my sac open on rocks and whack off to nurses in the hospital
music: ur utter sexual groans
anything eles: i am a swinger, and very toit like a toiger
******************
Member of the NS Army

Head mads represent

Remember it's 10% equipment, 90% rider, and 0% what kinda jacket your wearing

'I hit a kid with my car over xmas break, put him in the hospital on a ventilator for two days serves him right' dspin7x
'Over christmas break, i got hit by a car, and had to go on a ventalator in the hospital for like 2 days.' markd13

as a rider already for the street cred factory team, i must say these are abonimable.. it might jsut have to be me mommy and appskier... youre all pathetic

KNUCK IF YOU BUCK BOY

The Michael Jordan, the Babe Ruth, The Wayne Gretzky of Newschoolers.com idiots needs no introduction.... but here\\\'s one anyways. John Andrew Steward, a rich kid from Georgia, will not hesitate for a moment to tell you exactly what he\\\'s thinking (and I use that term loosely). His over 2000 posts make him one of the most prolific retards on our list, and he\\\'s become something of a legend on this website, representing the ever-growing intellectually devoid section of the membership here at NS.com. In fact, when the Golden Wheelchair award was first conceived, there was some talk of naming it after him, as a dedication. Also among his qualifications are his being named so often to Crystal-Needs-A-Park\\\'s honorary hall of fame for stupid posts, that the proprietor was forced to abandon the project: Atlantaski simply flooded it too quickly. Further, he had more entries into the original Hall of Fame for Stupid Posts than any other member of Newschoolers.com. Though he went into temporary retirement a few months ago, he has recently returned with a vengeance and, far from missing a beat, has stepped his stupidity up to new heights, recently capturing a GW award for mocking Trevor Peterson. He is fully deserving of his place near the top of this list

name: HENRY FRIEND
eye color: BLUE
heart rate: YEA, I GOT ONE
length: COCK PUSH-UPS
girth: GIRTH WORTHY
sponcers: CASANOVA SKI SHOP, MARQUETTE MOUNTAIN
reason you ski: IT'S ALL I KNOW
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): URBAN BACKYARD RAILS
favorite season to ski: SPRING IN THE MIDWEST
music: THE PIXIES, RAMONES, CLASH
anything eles: SKIING IS KINDA COOL I GUESS
---------
I am Ben Wallace

what are ur choices mommy?
******************
Member of the NS Army

Head mads represent

Remember it's 10% equipment, 90% rider, and 0% what kinda jacket your wearing

'I hit a kid with my car over xmas break, put him in the hospital on a ventilator for two days serves him right' dspin7x
'Over christmas break, i got hit by a car, and had to go on a ventalator in the hospital for like 2 days.' markd13

so fill this out:
name: Mack h.r. pussy
eye color: albino (so red/pink i guess)
heart rate: --^--^--^--^-------------
lengh: 8'
girth: diameter=1.5 '
sponcers: USD skates, and Mommy's Male whore house
reason you ski: to meet guys, err, chicks
fav terrain (urban rails or backyardrails):rails are for pussies, i ski stairs and paved city hills
favorite season to ski: late spring, right after the mountains close and the snow melts and the people leave, sometimes between the grass you hit a great patch of ice
music: rap, and teen pop
anything eles: mommy, dont i suck your dick enough to get spancer money?
-joe

________________________________________
'Really, I gotta say that I'm glad you exist, 'cause if you didn't there'd be noone to make fun of and diss.'

P.O.S.E.R.S CREW
Rollers of NS unite!!!
603 for life
I'm conservative, just so you all know.

Member Number: 5172

Golden Wheel Chair Award 2004-09-21

mommy told me im on, sweet






holy shit!!!111!1! he has more hten one namne??>?? omggg!! what a sux0rz@!! LOL

I wrote the words to this song on the back of a photograph
Behind your back it goes
A little something like this is way to big to miss....

yo mommy, am i in?
-joe

________________________________________
'Really, I gotta say that I'm glad you exist, 'cause if you didn't there'd be noone to make fun of and diss.'

P.O.S.E.R.S CREW
Rollers of NS unite!!!
603 for life
I'm conservative, just so you all know.

Member Number: 5172

Golden Wheel Chair Award 2004-09-21

name: r crotch
eye color: blu
heart rate: beep beep beep beeeeeeep beeeeeep
lengh: 5'11''
girth: green
sponcers: g-marrc
reason you ski: i enjoy hucking big air
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): 'nice' midwest parks. pre season backyard rails
favorite season to ski:invierno y otono
music: motion city soundtrack, saves the day, talib kweli
anything eles: i have the blondest hair ever.

name: Jesus el savioooorrrrr Chris de esquire
eye color: Gay rainbow
heart rate: 2 fast 2 furiousss
lengh: i like mine in the 7-8 inch range
girth: too much fo yo sista to handle
sponcers: street cred skeez (soon, swedish penis pumps inc.
reason you ski: fo da ladayz
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): bushes n muffs
favorite season to ski: SUMMA BICH CUZ DATS WHEN DA LADAYZ WEAR LEESS CLOTHES YO//
music: simon n garfunkel fo shiizle
anything eles: street cred skeez in da muthafukn housss/ put a fat dik fo yo muthafukn mouf

name: Myron O'Flanagan
eye colour: Green with a bit of red in the whites
heart rate: cold
length: 5.675'
girth: pencil-like
sponcers: Enzyte, Rogaine, Zoloft
reason you ski: for the steez of it
fav terrain: (urban rails or backyard rails): backdoor rails
favorite season to ski: Hunting Season
music: Raffi, Pavarotti, Kenny G
anything eles: be at Liberty to choose, choose to bring Street Cred skis to the 4FRNT of freeskiing

im already on the team.
_______________
freeskiing.com, before you ever rag on newschoolers
I hate moguls.

name: Mary Focker
eye color: Dream Warrior
heart rate: Rocket
lengh:
girth: Magnum
sponcers: Teva, Nalgene, Dave Mathews Band, LL Bean
reason you ski: Cuz I'm From The Streets
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): Two Big Voluptuous Mounds
favorite season to ski: Lunar Eclipse
music: The Sound of My Ass After a Bowl of Beans

______________________________
'Hollywood Hulk you're at the end of your rope / i'll kick you in the butt, and wash your mouth at with soap' -Macho Man Randy Savage -from the hit album BE A MAN

name: Israel McDevitt
eye color: Red
heart rate: at rest 14bmp
length: of penis ... well lets say i have a tattoo on the old fella which reads 'devil spawn' in a size 310 font
girth: Huge
sponcers: UnderworldRomperstompers
reason you ski: Cause someones gotta bring the devil heat to the mountains
fav terrain (urban rails or backyard rails): his one time i jib in hell...
favorite season to ski: um.. winter
music: Hard core gothic/punk trance
anything eles: I'm a badass




___________________________
''Shake it like a polaroid picture''