Related: Post an entertaining review of the wolf shirt that you have found
"I, like many of you, was a skeptic of the Three Wolf Moon t-shirt. Sure it had three of the most fearsome beasts ever to grace this world howling at a massive lunar body but would it really bestow me with the powers that everyone else was claiming?
In a word yes, that and so much more.
When I received the shirt I opened the box and saw that the packing slip said the shirt was a medium. This upset me because being an ample gentleman I had ordered the XXXL for myself. As soon as I picked the shirt up from the box, I kid you not, I shed 350 pounds and my muscles grew giving me the chiseled physique of a greek god. At this point I felt ok sure, that could happen from ANY t-shirt, why just the other day I bought a Spongebob t-shirt and then found a whistle ring at the bottom of a lucky Charms box. I had to test this thing out so I went up to my usual hunting ground at the Salvation Army to pick up a classy lady or two. Oh there were donations going on there that day, of sexy women's phone numbers to me!! And as luck would have it one of them had a sister who was working on the set of Twilight and they were in need of some extra help on the set!! Things were really starting to look up and to celebrate I got myself a full 6 course meal at Burger King...5 from the menu...and the 6th was the sexy cashier who gave herself to me because of the raw power that my lupine brothers had bestowed upon me.
It wasn't all fun and games though. When I showed up at the Twilight set the following day I felt a surge of unbridled rage upon seeing the actor who was playing Edward and without realizing it raised him over my head and tore him in two. Witnesses say they heard the howling of a pack of wolves as it happened. When the police arrived they realized what had happened and no charges were pressed. One does not simply contain the feral power of a wolf pack. With that I left for the countryside to run with my new brothers, and the director of Twilight was forced to hire Robert Pattinson to replace the original actor who played Edward."