Member of the Month

KilaTsunami
October, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

Funny chair lift rides

profile picture
funkykid200
Posts: 81 - Karma: 16
once i met a guy from china (while skiing in washington) who said i should go to china and he could show me around
Nov 2 2012 6:24PM
5 0
profile picture
.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
This thread is about to turn into an even bigger bullshit fest than the "gaper quotes" thread.
Nov 2 2012 6:47PM
0 0
profile picture
yessir_B
Posts: 32 - Karma: 13
one time my mom went skiing with out me, and i went on the chairlift with one of those african americans
Nov 2 2012 7:36PM
0 0
profile picture
whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,103
ahhaaha i love doing this. "how's that scrotum infection?"
"it was oozing pus big time last night, but the doc said it will be fine in a few weeks."
"who do you think you got it from?"
"man it was probably rj, he was pulling my balls and his nails were dirty as fuck."
we could go on and on. my improv skills have gotten considerably better lol
Nov 2 2012 7:51PM
0 0
profile picture
a_burger
Posts: 5235 - Karma: 20,715
Got put with a group of 2 and another single for the summit lift at Wachusett. Kind of sat in the corner and listened to my music. Lift stopped half way up though, and didn't start for like 30 minutes. We all ended up telling ghost stories. Was pretty funny, had a pretty cool time.

Then when we got close to the top some gaper tried to jump off a bump next to the lift, flails his arms to the left to try and throw a 3 and just slams into the lift tower, screams and then slowly starts to pick up his gear. We all thought he died, was pretty funny
Nov 2 2012 8:03PM
0 0
profile picture
funkykid200
Posts: 81 - Karma: 16
thats not funny at all
Nov 2 2012 8:52PM
0 0
profile picture
tgm
Posts: 278 - Karma: 325
I was once on a chair with a guy from Texas named Joe. Frickin priceless. Had to try really hard to hold it in till i got off the lift.
Nov 2 2012 8:58PM
0 0
profile picture
AndyGreen
Posts: 827 - Karma: 61
.
Nov 2 2012 9:00PM
0 0
profile picture
MANDER
Posts: 4017 - Karma: 2,038
A while back I was in Whistler during the summer. Some old guy in a full blue with white pinstripe Sun Ice suit got on beside me. He had long blonde hair but I think he dyed it slightly blue. Fucking hipster. Anyways, he started crying like a little bitch because he was so scared of the chairlift. I'm pretty sure he said he was on NS or something. I think his name may have been Doug but I wasn't really listening to him because he was clearly a gaper. Anyone know which member this is?
Nov 2 2012 9:33PM
0 0
profile picture
Supergyro
Posts: 797 - Karma: 36
Shit. Just. Got. Real.
Nov 2 2012 11:07PM
0 0
profile picture
Ducky.
Posts: 5811 - Karma: 1,420
It's Gandalf.
Nov 3 2012 12:20AM
0 0
profile picture
Granby_killdozer
Posts: 2386 - Karma: -12,007
one time when I was skiing alone I got on the lift with two other guys, during the lift ride I over heard the two having a conversation and found out that one of them was an ex-convict who had been convicted of murder and had just been released. one particularly interesting thing I heard the guy say was "just cus I was carryin' a gun down the road don't mean I shot the guy" he also asked me if I had "found god". that lift ride was pretty funny... in a traumatizing sort of way.    
Nov 4 2012 11:00PM
0 0
profile picture
bighomieflock
Posts: 2040 - Karma: 2,445
just the other day I was taking the singles line and I was riding with these 2 girls and a guy and they thought I was listening to music. They kept talking about awkward lift rides and how the lift ride would have been awkward if I wasn't listening to music, and the whole time I was just sitting there silently.
Nov 4 2012 11:08PM
0 0
profile picture
juicedrummer11
Posts: 1960 - Karma: 1,331
you should have replied right as you were getting off the lift, "your right, that was a pretty awkward lift ride" and just rode away as silently as you left. or something to that effect.

one time while on a lift with a lady about in her early 30s max and me and 2 friends, we decided to try and make it awkward and were talking about fingering girls and whether or not you could get aids while fingering her with a small cut on your finger. i don't think the lady heard about the cut but then she proceeded to give us an enlightening sex talk about how you can't get aids from fingering as well as several other possible ways to get it. she was pretty funny
Nov 5 2012 1:41AM
0 0
profile picture
whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,103
that was an excellent troll opportunity!
Nov 5 2012 1:41AM
0 0
profile picture
snowmosexual
Posts: 1933 - Karma: 10,020
Click for larger image
Nov 5 2012 12:28PM
0 0
profile picture
dompuch
Posts: 1449 - Karma: 1,187
I can see where this is going, still enjoyable ha
Nov 5 2012 12:32PM
0 0
profile picture
Peach.
Posts: 3879 - Karma: 933
this.
Nov 5 2012 1:00PM
0 0
profile picture
GrabsForFun
Posts: 1378 - Karma: 396
Well once I got on the lift with a mother with her 2 children. I was listening to some music and right between 2 songs I heard her say to her children: "Stay away from guy´s like that, the ones with the big clothes". I looked to the left to find them all staring at me. It was pretty funny
Nov 5 2012 1:13PM
0 0
profile picture
yippie
Posts: 268 - Karma: 91
Once, I was alone on a chairlift. Yh, that was pretty funny.
Nov 5 2012 3:10PM
0 0
profile picture
P3RPL3N1NJ4
Posts: 50 - Karma: 37
My and a buddy got on a lift next to these two guys that were talking about how much they had spent on cocaine.  It was an interesting ride.
Nov 5 2012 3:18PM
0 0
profile picture
kootenayklaus
Posts: 3914 - Karma: 2,179
Once, I had a man snort coke from a McDonald's toy bag next to me and 2 of my other buddies. I shit you not.

Other than that, I find it funny to piss off of the lift with randoms on with me.
Nov 5 2012 5:21PM
0 0
profile picture
Peach.
Posts: 3879 - Karma: 933
Nah you're shitting us.
Nov 5 2012 5:29PM
0 0
profile picture
Nacho+
Posts: 3748 - Karma: 7,791
not funny...but i rode up the chair with tim kelley
Nov 5 2012 10:00PM
0 0
profile picture
Hypno_Cat
Posts: 997 - Karma: 1,229
just a bunch of Gapes that try to tell me my skis are broken ( twin tips ) and mounted wrong (center mounted)
Nov 5 2012 10:06PM
0 0
profile picture
cwphoto
Posts: 2332 - Karma: 780
threads... these are pretty lol
Nov 5 2012 10:11PM
0 0
profile picture
Kretzschmar
Posts: 6707 - Karma: 98,281
had two older FIBS (fucking illinois bitches) on the chairlift with me and asked me if i was any good. of course i went on to say how i was fully sponsored by K2, Full Tilt, and Saga as well as I was at the X Games this year and they believed me.
Nov 5 2012 10:14PM
0 0
profile picture
roddy116
Posts: 10630 - Karma: 7,456
any elder person with an accent.
Nov 5 2012 10:15PM
0 0
profile picture
J-C
Posts: 1138 - Karma: 3,683
so one day i just finished a lesson and decided to go do a few hot lap by myself but in the chair in front of me there was my friend another ski instructor and my other that was helping her but at the end of the ride when they lift the bar a kid fell off head first wasn't really funny but it was pretty traumatising but the girl ended up being fine
Nov 5 2012 10:17PM
0 0
profile picture
bjobe
Posts: 343 - Karma: 26
I was on the chairlift and this old guy started asking us why his grandchild wanted to snowboard instead of ski and what was wrong with him and why would he want to do that if skiing was so fun, and every couple sentences he would start talking in a different language. It was so hard to try not to laugh.

And first page claim!
Nov 5 2012 10:21PM
0 0
profile picture
aj_everly
Posts: 563 - Karma: 213
on the life with my friend and a gaper father playing music out of my headphones pretty loudly
gaper father: "turn down your music, its profane"
i respectfully silence the music
he proceeds to make a phone call to his kid in the lodge
i hit up the barry manilow copacabana at max volume
we groove to it the rest of the ride up
Nov 5 2012 10:25PM
0 0
profile picture
450out.
Posts: 596 - Karma: 517
Last year I was in the line about to go up with my two friends. They jumped in front of me and grabbed two empty spots on the chair just leaving. I got on with this old guy and his two daughters. My friends turn around and start laughing at me, because I'm just chilling with this old racer dude. He turns to me and says "I missed the joke." I was like me too. Then he started telling really shitty ski jokes about people falling off cliffs and stuff. It was weird.
Nov 5 2012 10:26PM
0 0
profile picture
TNORTS
Posts: 2077 - Karma: 2,756
I was skiing my ON3P Jeffrey's with the ferret topsheets. The girl I was on the lift with was rocking these women's skis called the beavers. We had a solid conversation about our respective rodents.
Nov 5 2012 10:26PM
0 0
profile picture
_Garagely_
Posts: 1948 - Karma: 3,247
One time this girl would not stop asking me what they did with the snow at the end of the season.
Nov 5 2012 10:26PM
0 0
profile picture
zascherl
Posts: 94 - Karma: 95
On the cabriolet at The canyons this enormous Somoan dude told me he was a Special CIA operative and then gave me a parol note and a weird handwritten mission briefing or some shit. He said he was looking for a rapist and that if I gave it to the police theyd give me $10000. When we got to the top he just walked away. Kinda odd to say the least.
Nov 5 2012 11:55PM
0 0
profile picture
manutdsaol
Posts: 906 - Karma: 56
Damn them illinois bitches
Nov 6 2012 12:17AM
0 0
profile picture
Kretzschmar
Posts: 6707 - Karma: 98,281
Yea I have friends from Illinois that ski but some of the ones that come to GP are fucking annoying and just rich gapers who think they rule the hill
Nov 6 2012 12:28AM
0 0
profile picture
Logan.
Posts: 717 - Karma: 1,862
Best story i've heard.
Nov 6 2012 12:48AM
0 0
profile picture
manutdsaol
Posts: 906 - Karma: 56
Yeah I know the type most people who ski around here are pretty rich.
Nov 6 2012 12:50AM
0 0
profile picture
Cotter
Posts: 2546 - Karma: 849
I was on the lift with my friend and these 2 older ladies. My buddy dropped his slushie cup into the unskiable forest area inbetween the runs. This lady starts lecturing him about littering and how he would feel if he skiied over that. He replied well its in the unskiable terrain, she still tried to convince him how he was wrong. It was hard to hold my laughter in.
Nov 6 2012 8:59AM
0 0
profile picture
bighomieflock
Posts: 2040 - Karma: 2,445
You're stupid.
Nov 6 2012 9:25AM
0 0
profile picture
Petey.
Posts: 5736 - Karma: 4,885
My buddy hocked a loogie off the chairlift right near the top once, and for SOME reason there was a ~10 year old girl laying in the middle of the trail right under the chairlift. Splattered all over her goggles, could not hold in laughter.
Nov 6 2012 9:37AM
0 0
profile picture
speedin
Posts: 731 - Karma: 131
Yea, cause there are no rich gapers in Wisconsin. Right? With all those "mountains" and "snow".

Nov 6 2012 12:05PM
0 0
profile picture
Kretzschmar
Posts: 6707 - Karma: 98,281
thats why i said "hill" if you refer to my post. and no there arent any rich gapers in WI we are all way to good to be gapers
Nov 6 2012 12:24PM
0 0
profile picture
Cebra
Posts: 505 - Karma: 35
threads
Nov 6 2012 12:59PM
0 0
profile picture
.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
Something only a gaper would say.
Nov 6 2012 1:06PM
0 0
profile picture
Kretzschmar
Posts: 6707 - Karma: 98,281
or I was being sarcastic
Nov 6 2012 1:10PM
0 0
profile picture
.Rybak.
Posts: 9017 - Karma: 9,864
Pretty much
Nov 6 2012 1:25PM
0 0
profile picture
ikindalikeskiing
Posts: 1381 - Karma: 142
threads!!!! cant think of any stories right now though
Nov 6 2012 2:08PM
0 0
profile picture
MustBeMattyB
Posts: 495 - Karma: 2,147
I had a guy seriously ask me if i had been skiing in the "trick ditch" when i realized he was talking about the half pipe i couldn't help but laugh my ass off
Nov 6 2012 2:12PM
0 0
profile picture
izz
Posts: 60 - Karma: 36

me and my friend were on the chairlift with this one middle aged guy who was talking about how much he loved skiing pow pow at tremblant and that once, back when he was a ski patroller, he saw a girl  cut  her whoha on her snowboard accidentally while trying to get off the chairlift. not funny, just weird as fuck

Nov 6 2012 2:31PM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-5)