>blacktext

L(OL)st

Look, if you had one pot, or one opportunity
To eat all the spaghetti you ever wanted in one moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip through your fork?
Yo

His palms are penne, knees meat, arms spaghetti
Add meatballs to the spaghetti, mom's secret recipe
He's nervous, but on the surface mom's spaghetti looks ready for meatballs
but he eats all the spaghetti, he can choke down,
the whole crowd goes spaghetti
He opens his mouth, but spaghetti won't come out
He's cooking now, everybody's cooking now
The clock's run out, dinner is over, bloah!
Snap back to spaghetti, spaghetti is gravity
OP goes Rabbity, he choked
He's so mad, but he won't give up that
Spaghetti, no
He won't have it , he knows spaghetti looks like little ropes
It don't matter, it's dope
He knows that, but he's broke
He loves spaghetti he knows
When he goes back to his mobile kitchen, that's when it's
Back to spaghetti again, yo
This whole rap's spaghetti
He better grab spaghetti fast and hope he don't spill it
[Hook:]
You better lose yourself in the pasta, lasagna
Spaghetti, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to eat
This spaghetti only comes once in a lifetime yo
(You better)

Spaghetti is escaping, through his mouth that is gaping
This spaghetti's mine for the taking
Make me more, as we move toward a, new spaghetti order
A normal meal is boring, but spaghetti's awesome
Boil til it's softer, the water grows hotter
He blows on it to cool it off a bit faster
Coast to coast meals, he's known as spaghetti eater
Lonely roads, spaghetti knows
He's grown wheat from home, he's no farmer
He goes home and barely knows how to boil water
But hold your nose 'cause this sauce here has spoiled
His hoes don't want him no more, his dinner's foiled
They moved on to the next schmoe who cooks
He nose dove and sold pasta
So the cookbook has told and slams closed
I suppose it's old spaghetti but it still tastes awesome
Da da dum da dum da da

No more games, I'ma change what you call spaghetti
Tear this motherfreaking pot of pasta off the stove
I was cooking in the beginning, the dinner's all ready
It's been chewed up and spit out and still looks good
But I kept cooking and stepped right into the next kitchen
Best believe somebody's payin for this spaghetti
All the pain inside amplified by spaghetti
Cause I can't get by without spaghetti
And I can't provide the right type of sauce for this spaghetti
Cause man, these goddam food stamps don't buy spaghetti
And it's no movie, there's no Chance of Meatballs, this is my spaghetti
And these times are so soft, and my spaghetti's even softer
Trying to cook and eat my spaghetti, plus
Teeter totter caught up between being a farmer and a pasta cooker
Baby mama drama's screaming spaghetti and
There's not enough for me to wanna
Share with her, another day without spaghetti
Has gotten me to the point, I'm starving now
I've got to formulate a recipe or end up straved and dead
Spaghetti is my only motherfreaking option, lasagna's not
Spaghetti, I love you, but this parmesan's got to go
I cannot grow old eating my spaghetti cold
So here I go it's my dish.
Sauce fail me not, this may be the only spaghetti that I got

>enjoying delicious juicy steak
>phone rings
>blocked number
>prank call
>I remember when I was 12

i cried.

>Wake up on a monday
>Oh god mondays
>really have to shit
>Just before I go to the bathroom I see the school bus coming
>Grab tuba and run out the door without shitting
>Sit on the back seat, all the others are to small for me
>see cute girl I've loved sense 7th grade
>maybe she'll see that I'm the one for her today and sit with me
>she doesn't
>"fuck that whore fuck her!" I think as treats roll down my eye
>I lick them off my cheeks because I love the salty taste
>get to school
>really have to shit but have fear of public bathrooms
>squeeze my ass cheeks really hard so I don't have to shit anymore
>make it to third period band class
>playing like a boss
>get to really low note
>the tone causes my asshole to vibrate
>cant stop playing as I start farting
>I can feel the shit coming
>People stop playing and stare at me as I fart and shit my pants
>All their assholes are being vibrated by the sound of my tuba
>we all fart and shit ourselves, spaghetti comes out of my tuba
>shit and spaghetti everywhere
>principle walks in and sees us all farting and shitting
>he does a 360 and walks away

awkward moment when you hit the mythical brown note with a tuba

holy fuck this thread is great. I couldnt get through the lyrics at work. Must come back and read it later when I can lol freely.

>be futurespins
>mfw get paid

i fucking approve of this thread

if you have to ask, you cant afford it.

Its worth it

>in drawing class at school

wat

360 means he would keep walking in. Nice try.

derp

try to say are you ok and I'm fucking sorry
comes out as are you fucking sorry
you suck gtfo

Lulz

Threads, and bump.

Love how you bumped this. Almost forgot about this little gem.

>be 12
>have boner
>look up "hot nudez Miley Cyrus Hannah Montana"
>Angela, 23 from prince George wants to chat
>say "hi"
>realizes Angela looks like my mom
>go to moms room
>see her on computer
>go shut off computer
>mom makes me apple slices
>worthit.jpg

>christmas party

>swerve
>implying
>swerve

>swerve

+k was given

mofucking threads

C'mon. Need moar!

>go to gym and see cute girl working counter
>immediately feel my snake rising
>become smitten with her
>show her a quick flash of the condom in my wallet
>she pretends not to notice and looks nervous
>suddenly hear a squishy noise and feel a slimy feeling
>oh no oh go not now
>reach into pocket to strangle it into submission
>2000 pieces of the substance wrap around the girl and I locking is into an eternal bond
>mom's spaghetti

lost hard. k to you sir

and bump this thread yay

hahah wat is this

this is /b/. the tops of the internet entertainment world

> address hot teacher after class
> stare at tits blatantly
> I ask why she is staring at my tits
> I then stare deep into her tits
> we have tit stare off
> her tits blink
> my tits turn red hot
> she grabs "emergency first aid kit" off wall
> she then feeds me the York peppermint patty out of the bag
> I puke patty back up her urethra
> I then receive head until I puke her spit back out
> feels better then chewing 5 gum
> receive A on test
> awarded medal
> hits gucci plateau
> spaghetti does not fall out of his pockets
> meets big air Dave
> gets trolled by splice
> kills himself and films it
> splice puts vid in his next edit
> goes viral

> take this broad on a picnic

>trying to be 4chan on Newschoolers

>mfw spaghetti

ALL HAIL FSM!

Valid point

Don't think I've ever laughed so hard at a thread

u w0t m8

>if you have one shot one opportunity to seize everything you ever wanted would you capture it or let it slip

>be 17 in senior year high school

haha

haahaha

>>461822
>after a few more minutes of silence she says something, but I'm not concentrating
>I just laugh and say, "so true!"
>"what the fuck? You think it's funny that my dad has cancer?"
>I choke on my spaghetti and it sprays all over the table
>I reactively reach over and start picking the chunks of spaghetti out of her glass of wine
>she looks like she's about to throw up and runs into the bathroom
>I pursue her and try to tell her that only a tiny bit got on her dress, but she won't listen
>she slams the cubicle door in my face and I can hear her spewing
>an old woman comes out of another cubicle and screams at the sight of me
>"pervert! Pervert!"
>"what? No! My girlfriend is feeling ill and I'm just checking if she's alright!"
>from behind the cubicle my girlfriend shouts, "I'm not your girlfriend!"
>the old lady whacks me around the head with her handbag
>the strap hits me in the eye
>in a moment of (literally) blind fury I yell "Shuryuken!" and lunge at her with an uppercut
>I miss spectacularly and fall to the floor
>two waiters burst in and drag me into the kitchen where they tell me that after I pay I have to leave
>suddenly remember I spent all my money on my new fedora
>I try to make a dash for it but trip on my cape and go crashing into the lobster tank
>the lobsters start attacking me so I grab a shard of glass and slash them all to death
>everyone is horrified by the massacre I just committed and they flinch away from me as I collect my spaghetti and leave
>stop in the doorway and take one last look at the havoc I'd wreaked
>everyone cowers in fear
>alpha as fuck

>at uni with gradually worsening stomach pains
>head home as fast as public transportably possible
>bus arrives 15mins late
>sit down in empty seat
>hot chick sits next to me
>hold back the poots as best as possible
>squeaks and groans emanate from my posterior region
>bus htis a pothole and time slows down as I realize what will happen when I land
>arms shoot out and grab onto the seats! crisis averted!
>girls looks at me like im a fucking lunatic
>bus then runs over a bump
>a fart like a squeaky door opening escapes my butthole
>girl next to me turns around and gawks at me
>she turns so fast a wet fart that sounds like bulldog sneezing at the exact same time escapes her own lovering
>both of us are perfectly still
>silently relish the aroma of each others farts
>a wild boner appears! oh shit my stop!
>squeeze past the girl and let out a couple of farewell toots
>crabwalk my way back home at MAXIMUM VELOCITY with sphincter sealed air tight
>fumble way into house
>shirt off before im past the doorway, pants off before I get to the toilet
>gas pressure ejects a colossal buttnugget out of my cornhole like some sort of turd mortar
>pray to crapotor jesus that the shit lands in the shitter as I slam my asshole down as fast as possible to seal the eldritch stench within the sanctity of the holy bowl
>the whole house reverberates with the sound of wet sheets being ripped as the unholy beast reduces me to tears as it is exorcised
>let forth a guttural growl of pain and ecstasy as satan himself swan dives out of my ravaged asshole with tears and a mouthful of saliva
>finally overcome with a sense of relief and emptiness as I feel like I have been literally hollowed out, poochute first
>check bowl to survey damage and have a wipe
>bowl is empty and paper comes off clean

this is incredible