That was fuckin hilarious. Here is the transcript. Read it!
For those of you who don't have kids or are far too young to remember
the splendid children's TV programme 'Rainbow', this may be a little
lost on you...... but it must have been a great episode to watch!
Almost too ridiculous to believe... These are taken from original
Rainbow scripts and there's no way these could have been done by
accident. Innuendo all the way....
The sketch opens with Zippy peeling a banana...
Zippy: 'One skin, two skin, three skin, four.... '
George: 'Zippy, where is Bungle?'
Zippy: 'I think Geoffrey is trying to get him up'
We see a view of the door and hear Bungle moaning from behind it.
Bungle: 'Geoffrey, I can't get it in'
Geoffrey: 'You managed it last night'
Bungle: 'I know, let's try it round the other way around. Ooooooh, I've got it in'
Bungle and Geoffrey enter the studio with Bungle carrying a hammer and peg kit
Bungle: 'Would you stick this on the shelf, George'
George: 'I can't reach, you'll have to stick it up yourself,
Geoffrey (to camera) ' Hello everyone, today we are talking about playing'
Bungle: 'Playing with each other, Geoffrey?'
Geoffrey: 'Yes Bungle, do you have a special friend that you like to play with?'
George: 'Yesterday we played with our balls.
Are we going to play with our friend's balls today?'
Bungle: 'Yes, and we can play with our twangers as well.'
Geoffrey (to camera): Have you seen Bungles twanger?
Zippy: 'Oh I have, I showed him how to pluck with it.'
Bungle: 'It's my plucking instrument.'
Geoffrey asks the audience if they can pluck like Bungle
Zippy: 'I can, I'm the best plucker here.'
George: 'And I'm good at banging. My peg's hard isn't it Zippy?'
Zippy: 'Well of course it is, Your peg wouldn't go in if it was soft.'
Geoffrey: 'Let's get back to Bungle's twanger.'
Bungle (excited): 'Oooooh Geoffrey, we could all paint our twangers couldn't we?'
George: 'Let's sing that plucking song.'
Bungle: 'Rod and Roger can get their instruments out and Jane has got two lovely Maracas.'
Singers Rod, Roger and Jane enter.
Rod: 'We could hear you all banging away.'
Roger: 'Banging can be fun.'
Jane: 'Ooooh yes, and I was banging away all last night with Rod and Roger.'
Roger (looking sad): 'Yes, but it broke my plucking instrument.'
Geoffrey: 'Never mind Roger, let sing the plucking song, come on
everybody get your instruments out.'
Rod (to Jane): 'Do you want to blow on my pipe while I'm twanging away?'
Jane: 'Oh no Rod, I was blowing a lot with Roger last night. But would you
like to play with my maracas?'
Zippy: 'No, let's just pluck away with our twangers.'
Bungle: 'Yes, it doesn't matter what size your twanger is.'
Zippy: 'I've got a big red one.'
George: 'I've only got a tiny twanger. But it works well and I like to play with it.'
Geoffrey (to viewers): 'Well, have you got your twangers out? And remember,
you can bounce your balls at the same time. If you haven't got any balls,
ask a friend if you can play with his. Now, let's all sing the plucking song.'
Everyone in studio: 'Pluck, pluck, pluck away, we're going to pluck all day today.'
'Pluck, pluck, pluck away, we're going to pluck all day.'
Geoffrey (to viewers): ' It's time for us all to go now, but don't forget to
get your twangers out and play with your balls.' 'See you soon. Bye.'
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I'm so constipated I've become a prune juice conesuir (sp)
'peter north is fucken awesome, hes got a big rod and blows gallons of semen on fresh 18 year old faces
-lateralis
'It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.'
-Dubya.
'You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.'
'Cocaine is God's way of saying your're making too much money.'
Robin Williams.
'I don't like people who take drugs... Customs men for example.'
