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Long Distance Relationships

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Guck
Posts: 528 - Karma: 221
I'm going to college this fall and my girlfriend is staying home (a year younger than me). It's going to be tough, anybody have an experience like this?
13 years ago
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74267000027
Posts: 302 - Karma: 14
you can always exchange repoductive parts through the mail
13 years ago
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Childstar.
Posts: 1947 - Karma: 2,213
No.

Just No.


13 years ago
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alex=
Posts: 1738 - Karma: 2,835
never works
13 years ago
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BrewskiJr
Posts: 5738 - Karma: 1,478
I've been dating a girl for 10 months who lives 2 hours away in the summer and 3 hours during the school year. Shes fucking awesome so to me, its worth it. I've fucked around enough to feel fine with it too. If you are just leaving high school, honestly, I would take a break. You will have so much fun finding yourself, hooking up with random girls and what not. I was dating a girl from high school my freshman year of college and kind of wished I had played the single game a while. Freshman year you can get away with anything pretty much. When it comes to girls, its the time of your life. Its almost too easy. Take advantage and get it out of your system, that way when the right girl comes along, you can commit and not feel like you haven't lived for yourself.



Trust me on this.
13 years ago
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AndyBoy
Posts: 122 - Karma: 25
how far apart will you guys be?
13 years ago
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Yeezy
Posts: 1652 - Karma: 206
My brother was in the same situation where he was 4.5hrs away from his girlfriend. saw her few times a month and now that shes in college only .5hr everything is fine. Depends on the girl i guess!
13 years ago
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garrett.
Posts: 9304 - Karma: 3,670
i would recommend not doing this. i was long distance with my gf from june till january of this year. it blew, but I was working everyday and not out and about or at school at all so that made it easier. But your going to be in one of the best times of your life tied down to a girl that isnt even around.

also look at it from the other side, she is going to be a senior in high school. I remember my senior year and it was fun as fuck. I wouldnt want to be in a long distance relationship in either of your situations. I would think that this would ultimately just hold both you back from what could be a really good year.

with that being said, i dont know either of you so i dont know what type of people you are, so it could work. it could. but i would not recommend it.
13 years ago
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Toaster-Tony
Posts: 3531 - Karma: 5,850
I've went through this last year.

If you don't love her, or see anything serious happening down the road, it's time to end it.

You don't want to give up your weekends going to see her (given that you live close enough) and sacrifice making friends and getting involved at your school. Plus, the temptation is always there to hook up with someone at a party, so if you can avoid that, more power to you. But overall, you'll need to dedicate a lot of time and effort into making it work and it's almost too much to do if you aren't in love with her.

In my experience, I gave up a big part of my freshman year to stay with my summer gf and we ended up breaking up anyways; it's something I regret to this day. Enjoy college single, and meet friends. That's my advice to you.

And a motto to stick to if you do stay together through college is "If you both want it to work, it will."
13 years ago
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thenightman
Posts: 766 - Karma: 132
Honestly, you only have four more years of carelessness. Don't tie yourself down with a girl you cant have sloppy drunken sex with regularly. Dump the girl back home, and go out and get shitfaced on weekdays and weekends and hook up with random girls. You'll look back on your college years with regret if you don't.
13 years ago
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Ducky.
Posts: 5811 - Karma: 1,420
It did for me.
13 years ago
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PON3
Posts: 3817 - Karma: 783
My girlfriend lives in mexico for half the year and we are better than ever. Just have to be super strong and if you last through it, you can last through any thing. Just skype a lot and sexy skype too to keep the heat and passion still in the mix. It will be a test to see if you truly love each other
13 years ago
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wasatch_rat
Posts: 1773 - Karma: 2,969
at your age, and for an entire year, i would not recommend it. i have been dating my gf for almost 2 years, and i'm in chile for 6 weeks so we're doing the long distance thing, and its hard as fuck. i love her, and have confided more in her than any human being on earth, and we make it work, but its really hard, even for just 6 weeks. for a full year, especially at your age when you are both discovering new things and people and changing so fast, you will almost definitely grow apart.

break it off, but try to do it on the friendliest terms, maybe even keep it open to the possibility of trying again when she enters college. no sense in tying yourself down now.

that said, if you do really want to try it, skype is your new best friend. also, try do do things in common to have something to talk about (read the same books, follow the same shows, etc). also, you have to trust eachother 110%, jealousy will dissolve the relationship. if either of you don't trust each other it won't work when you visit for vacations, make them COUNT (lots of romantic things together, lots of sex, the whole shebang). i still think you have about a 95% chance of failure if you do try, but i hope this post helps. good luck with whatever you decide to do.
13 years ago
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BrewskiJr
Posts: 5738 - Karma: 1,478
Yup. And trust us, it's worth it. You can have the rest I your life to be stuck in a relationship with a girl you love, but during these couple years just go bat shit crazy and just have fun
13 years ago
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Caspaaa
Posts: 4830 - Karma: 1,466
worked for my cousin too, junior year in highschool all the way through the his second year of college, now the two of them are engaged so even better.


and it's working for me so far, 2 years.
13 years ago
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miroz
Posts: 10333 - Karma: 3,948
It works for some people. For others, it doesn't. You have to take a really hard, honest look at your relationship and yourself and assess whether it's something you really want. Is being single in college really for you? Will you be able to handle the stresses of long distance? My roommate's done it for the past two years. Do I think he's missing out? Yeah, but that's just me.

I couldn't do long distance in college. It would not work for me. If you're the type who likes to go out, meet people, party, and drink excessively, long distance will probably not be for you. Who knows, it might be, and it's not my place to generalize you. But that's been my experience.e
13 years ago
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Utard
Posts: 2132 - Karma: 306
Try to work out something where you're allowed to hook up with other people while you're away
13 years ago
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Anathema
Posts: 21048 - Karma: 5,062
dont bother. it might work, but chances are it wont and in the future youll be like "fuck i missed so many opportunities in my first year of college by committing to a girl im now broken up with. fuck my life."

it just depends on how tight a connection you both have.

but in all honesty, youre high school kids. that shit isn't forever. you're what, 17? dump her and move on. it'd be a totally different story if you were 25 and lived away from your girlfriend for 8 months or something.

youre in your experimental phase. you should be banging and fooling around with as many girls as possible so that you can find yourself and really discover what you like in a woman. don't get tied down at such a young age, broski.
13 years ago
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theabortionator
Posts: 52427 - Karma: 171,873
facepalm
13 years ago
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[hamnuts]
Posts: 2356 - Karma: 439
works for me.
13 years ago
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Hamster.
Posts: 1636 - Karma: 26
I've raced a lot in my childhood, and thus met a low of people through traveling, and tried it many many times. Never really works unless shes the one. I mean me and my one ex from Wisconsin rarely talk but know we still actually love and care for each other, when we broke up, and when we got in fights after that we always said how we would always think of each other in the future (ex. after college), and so I wait, seeing if between now and then I find someone better or just as special, otherwise I would like to try and rekindle it with her.

Sparknotes: I would take a break, and maybe come back at a later point if she really is "the one" or at least very special. You or her may find someone that will make you happier in the break, which could be good, but hey hookups along the way don't hurt?
13 years ago
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BrewskiJr
Posts: 5738 - Karma: 1,478
I don't get it. By sleeping aroun I found what I really liked in women and looked for in women.
13 years ago
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TRASHY.
Posts: 736 - Karma: 355
They suck balls, don't do it.
13 years ago
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
Yeah your dick. We know.
13 years ago
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Forcillo
Posts: 3801 - Karma: 3,580
Step 1. Don't tell people that you have a GF
Step 2. Fuck mad amounts of bitches
Step 3. Don't tell your GF

#Winning
13 years ago
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deleted5
Posts: 14507 - Karma: 13,510
Gonna be the dick here and say she will cheat on you. This happened to all 3 of my friends plus you will be in college there will be so many hot girls.
13 years ago
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JakeAssBeatClap
Posts: 6673 - Karma: 2,537
Disagree, they CAN suck balls but when they work they're superb. Comes down to the feelings you share with the other person and what you're willing to do to be with them.
13 years ago
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Toaster-Tony
Posts: 3531 - Karma: 5,850
Click for larger image
13 years ago
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TRASHY.
Posts: 736 - Karma: 355
Yes you're right they can work, but you both have to be 100% into it and most of the time that isn't the case. These days it's hard enough to make a relationship work with someone who lives in your own town. But when it does work, it's golden !
13 years ago
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Caspaaa
Posts: 4830 - Karma: 1,466
lol just kiddng
13 years ago
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Anathema
Posts: 21048 - Karma: 5,062
.
13 years ago
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JakeAssBeatClap
Posts: 6673 - Karma: 2,537
In order to be 100% in it. If ya know what I mean.


13 years ago
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skituner
Posts: 1162 - Karma: 127
there's no point in bringing sand to the beach...
13 years ago
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comeatmebro
Posts: 10720 - Karma: 66
you will get cheated on
13 years ago
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Nurgle
Posts: 1249 - Karma: 15
Ive been dating the same girl for the last year and a half. Spent 7 months in California last year, and 3 months this year, working and making sporadic trips back when I live out here.

Its incredibly possible, and along with this incredibly hard. If she isnt madly in love with you, any chance of cheating, flirtacious, etc, cut it now. You literally need to find that perfect faithful girl, be honest with yourself, and just cut it if you have doubts. You dont want to put yourself through the pain of consistently worrying.

Set up skype dates, nightly phone calls, wake her up in the morning, text her, etc. Send flowers occasionally, cute pictures, a teddy bear, take her to build a bear for gods sake.
13 years ago
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Nurgle
Posts: 1249 - Karma: 15
yup, and you can look back on your college days with regret for your induction to medications to calm that itch in your pants.
13 years ago
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Guck
Posts: 528 - Karma: 221
Here's my story, i'm not that big into partying and i'd rather have my one girl than five babes. I'm probably going to get bashed and what not for that, but that's how I am. I've been spending most of my free time contemplating the situation because I really don't want to make a bad decision and it's been killing me. We've been together for about a year, but i'm going to be far away from her. I appreciate the stories and advice guys, i'm definitely going to give it a shot and see how it goes. Just looking for some vibes and optimism. But at the same time, i'm looking for the truth. I know there's a high rate of failure, but I have to give it a shot.
13 years ago
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purplejumpsuit
Posts: 2208 - Karma: 157
They SUCK. and be ready for it to suck. If she's really worth it, and you really really care for her, then give it a shot. Be prepared for hard times, keep communication lines open! And try not to let the little things tear you guys apart to much, because sometimes they can, some people are good at brushing them off tho, depends what type of people both of you are.

There are lots of ways to go about long distance relationships, some work, some dont, some work and are incredibly horrible (sleeping around a ton and not telling her) seen it done and they are still together after a winter apart.. but I say to be a decent person stay away from that route.

be honest, try to stay positive, and if possible work out a schedule that works for both of you to talk regularly via phone/skype.
13 years ago
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Sno.
Posts: 12309 - Karma: 7,852
Tried it. Didn't work-- we just broke up and were best friends long distance. But then we got back together when we were close again.
13 years ago
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dan1080
Posts: 1293 - Karma: 913
yea they ultimately dont work. it might seem to be working from the start but youll be doing whatever it is your doing and likewise so will she and one or both of you will probably start to have feelings for someone else or just get insecure about one another and what eachother is doing and it will be terrible. dont do it
13 years ago
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katie.
Posts: 2833 - Karma: 874
I'm currently trying it out. He lives 5 hours away but we're both in high school still which makes things kind of interesting. I think if you're really dedicated and you can make the most out of the time that you do get to spend together, any long distance relationship can work (seeing that the distance isn't toooo long and you can actually see eachother).

That being said, going off to college and leaving a girl behind is kind of shitty. You've moved into a totally new part of your life and if I were her, I know I wouldn't be able to stand having a boyfriend off surrounded by other girls and so many possibilities for new people / hookups / etc. I think for your own sake you need to just take a breath and if you don't see the benefits of being single (probably impossible for your first year of college...but I wouldn't know haha) and if she really is the one, then stick with her. It'll be worth it in the long run.

Fact of the matter is, if you love someone, it can work. Relationships are based on trust, communication and the physical stuff. As long as you can maintain all of those things, you're probably going to be ok. Just listen to your gut.
13 years ago
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Utard
Posts: 2132 - Karma: 306
ITT people claiming their anecdotal relationship experiences are true for everyone else going to college
13 years ago
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thenightman
Posts: 766 - Karma: 132
a problem that can be solved by antibiotics isn't a problem at all.
13 years ago
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Dolan.Escobar
Posts: 683 - Karma: 943
Im actually in an lda right now.

Im not sure what to do... This girl is a solid 8.5 (10 body), and shes crazy about me and wants to get married. I like her alot, but not as much as she likes me.

My whole life ive been the kind of person that didnt care about whether a girl liked me or not, if i wasnt totally into them then i ignored them basically.

But now i feel like if I broke it off with this girl it would destroy her; like literally she would be heartbroken. And i dont really want to do that to her, because (at least to me) she is the sweetest girl you will ever meet.

I would be happy if she moved to the us and got married- shes from a culture in which the male of the relationship is treated like royalty, and shes no exception.
any advices?
11 years ago
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Dolan.Escobar
Posts: 683 - Karma: 943
Dolan.EscobarIm actually in an lda right now.

Im not sure what to do... This girl is a solid 8.5 (10 body), and shes crazy about me and wants to get married. I like her alot, but not as much as she likes me.

My whole life ive been the kind of person that didnt care about whether a girl liked me or not, if i wasnt totally into them then i ignored them basically.

But now i feel like if I broke it off with this girl it would destroy her; like literally she would be heartbroken. And i dont really want to do that to her, because (at least to me) she is the sweetest girl you will ever meet.

I would be happy if she moved to the us and got married- shes from a culture in which the male of the relationship is treated like royalty, and shes no exception.
any advices?

*ldr
11 years ago
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Edward.
Posts: 9366 - Karma: 445
You'll be single within the next 2 months for sure. Relationships going into college almost always end within the first month
11 years ago
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Iliveinutah
Posts: 1250 - Karma: 5,147
dated a girl 4 years and lived together half that, i moved 2000 miles away for school and bitch feel apart in 6 months of me being away. gained 50 lbs lazy as fuck start stealing shit and partying all the time. ya doesn't work woman are needy as fuck. maybe if you can see them a few times a month but anything more then that, there fucking other dudes. given i was fucking other bitchs.
11 years ago
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lilL
Posts: 4 - Karma: 11
nook don't do it, never ends welllll
11 years ago
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