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October, 2024

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THRUSTERS ARE FUCKING CLIMBING

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Dinner420
Posts: 105 - Karma: 61
<<ATTENTIO>>SOMEONE THE FUCK NEEDS TO GET TO THRUSTERS IN JETWAY 3C AND 3D. THEY ARE AT 92%.... IF WE MISS THIS CHANCE WE ARE FUCKED FOR 2 WEEKS. GET YOUR HANDS OUT OF YOUR ASSES AND DO SOMETHING. WE NEED TO GET TO ALFA CNETARI AND NOT FUCK THIS MISSSION OVER.
Jul 23 2012 5:00PM
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malonius_funk
Posts: 2249 - Karma: 1,500
JUMBO SHRIMP REPORTING FOR DUTY. NEED TO MAKE MONEYZ AND HAND JOBZ TO SUPPORT MY FAMILY. OVER AND OUT. PUPPYDILDOZ.
Jul 24 2012 8:11PM
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11954 - Karma: 12,297
GOOD. NEED TWO MORE MEMBERS BEFORE EMBARKING.
Jul 24 2012 8:35PM
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JWoods
Posts: 2369 - Karma: 2,635
293-039-714 BACK FROM RECON MISSION TO PLANET THC-420 INITIATE THE HOT ROCK LYSERGIC ACID EXTRACTION WE ARE GOING TO NEED EXTRA HELP BONDING OUR SENSORS WITH THE LOCAL VEGETATION IN THE AREA. OVER
Jul 25 2012 1:23AM
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Ribss.
Posts: 3442 - Karma: 3,344
GREEN 10-04-20 REPORTING FOR DUTY SIR!

I WAS THE ANAYLIST THAT FIRST DISCOVERED YOUR LOCATION FOR RESCUE AND CONFIRMED INITIAL REPORTS OF HOSTILE LIFE.

I WANT TO SEE WHATS OUT THERE FIRST TIME, YOU KNOW? BRING THE BONGLOADS AND CARBONATED BARELY BEVERAGES AND LETS GO MINDFUCK THEM!
Jul 25 2012 3:48AM
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11954 - Karma: 12,297
STATUS REPORT A-36-B2:

OUR SHIPS WENT DOWN IN AN ELECTRICAL STORM WHILE ENTERING THE LOWER ATMOSPHERIC BIODOME. POWER WAS CUT AND WE FOUND OUR SHIPS FALLING OUT OF THE SKY. IT IS MY BELIEF THIS IS SOME SORT OF NATURAL, ORGANIC, DEFENSE SYSTEM MEANT TO PROTECT GOD KNOWS WHAT. COMS ARE DOWN AND IM WADING THROUGH A THICK SWAMP AND UNDERBRUSH TRYING TO FIND MY TEAM. THE AIR IS THICK WITH TRICHONIUM ROTOSPHERIC PARTICLES, CAUSING MY FOCUS TO WAVER AND MIND TO BECOME CLOUDY. I WONDER IF THE REST OF THE CREW, IF THEY SURVIVED THE CRASH, IS EXPERIENCING THE SAME THING...
Jul 25 2012 9:01PM
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Ric.
Posts: 710 - Karma: 362
COPY THAT GRANITE STATE. THE ELECTRICAL STORM HAS CLEAERED UP> SENDING A SEARCH PARTY TO RESCUE YOUR UNIT.
Jul 25 2012 9:31PM
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riddsicle
Posts: 684 - Karma: 264
poker 2-4 this is button whistle checking in from the air, am i clear for landing over
Jul 25 2012 9:50PM
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malonius_funk
Posts: 2249 - Karma: 1,500
POKER 2-4 THIS IS JUMBO SHRIMP. GET YOUR FUCKING ASS DOWN HERE THE NATIVES HAVE AMBUSHED FROM THE TREES AND ARE STEALING THE CANNABI NUCLEI. NEED EVAC ASAP. THEY'RE FUCKING EVERYWHERE. CHARLIE FUCKING EVERYWHERE.
Jul 25 2012 10:59PM
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malonius_funk
Posts: 2249 - Karma: 1,500
FUCK. THIS IS JUMBO SHRIMP. THE NATIVES NOW KNOW OUR POSITION AND OUR SENDING PHENOKLUNETIC MORTARS OUR WAY. GET YOUR SHIT PACKED AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE. ITS A FUCKING SHITSHOW WE NEED TO FIRE UP MORE CANNIBI TO PROVIDE RELIEF. YEAST NUGGETS. JUMBO SHRIMP OUT.
Jul 25 2012 11:09PM
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Darth.Maul
Posts: 2472 - Karma: 652
LIMP PIKKLE 247 REPORTING FOR DUTY. NOT SURE IF TRAP DOWN BELOW SO ORBITING PLANET UNTIL FURTHER ORDERS ARE RECEIVED. HAVE FRESH THC SUPPLIES FROM COLONEL SNOOP READY TO BE ADMINISTERED TO THE WOUNDED CREW AND VICTIMS.
Jul 25 2012 11:11PM
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vault.
Posts: 469 - Karma: 91
.Click for larger image
Jul 25 2012 11:35PM
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saskskier
Posts: 4774 - Karma: 10,005
Jul 25 2012 11:56PM
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Dinner420
Posts: 105 - Karma: 61
BACK OUT MEN AND GET TO THE SHIP. IT SEEMS AS THOUGH NEXUS-30 IS A LIVING ORGANISM. IT HAS GONE INTO SOME SORT OF TEMPER TANTRUM. THE NATIVES ARE THE LEAST OF OUR ISSUES. BACK OUT.

WE HAVE A QUASI 30 DELTA 420, I REPEAT A QUASI 30 DELTA 420. SITUATION IS GOING TO DICK.

PSILOCYBIN LEVELS RISING IN REACTORS 3 AND 4. THC DISPERSANTS HAVE MIXED CHEERFULLY IN REACTORS 5 AND 6. MAIN REACTOR CORE TEMP 90,000,000* C AND HOLDING. COUNT DOWN TO NURON IGNITION IS T-4 MINUTS SHIP LANDING BAYS CLOSING AT 24:16.

MISSION COLLECT AND RECEIVE STATUS: STAND BY
Jul 26 2012 12:13AM
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JWoods
Posts: 2369 - Karma: 2,635
293-039-714 REPORTING. ALL GROUND CREWS HAVE OFFICIALLY IN, THETA-HELLA-CHUCH CREW HAS CONFIRMED REPORTS OF A 69/420 CHILL TO PULL RATIO ON THE SURFACE OF NEXUS-30. FORTUNATELY WE HAD ZERO CASUALTIES TODAY BUT HIGH REPORTS OF GREEN OUTS. WE ARE READY FOR IGNITION.
Jul 26 2012 3:29AM
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Ribss.
Posts: 3442 - Karma: 3,344
SIR, GREEN 10-04-20 REPORTING IN FROM THE OUTSIDE WORLD. OUR SHIP CRASHED WHILE CHECKING OUT THE TRICHONIUM MINES DURING AN ELECTRICAL STORM, THE WHOLE EARTH IS COLLAPSING OUT THERE!

ALL SOLDIERS MADE IT BACK FROM MY CREW, BUT OFFICER GRANITESTATE IS BACK HEALTHILY.

I BELEIVE WE WERE THE LAST MEN OUT AND BEYOND THE SHIP. READY FOR TAKEOFF.
Jul 26 2012 3:42AM
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Dinner420
Posts: 105 - Karma: 61
IGNITION ENGAGED. FUEL CELL PRESURE INCREASING TO 420PSI IN CHAMBERS 1 AND 2. CALIBRATING BOSTER INTAKE OF ELIXER FUELS. PSILOCYBIN AND THC FUSION RATIOS INCREASING 50%. OBIT OF NEXUS IS SET AND LOCKED. I AM GETTING INTEL FROM LT. BURNT GREEN THAT 20 CANNABI DESTROYERS HAVE BEEN SENT FOR OUR ASSISTANCE. ETA 1 HOUR.

MISSION STATUS: STAND BY ORBIT
Jul 26 2012 4:38AM
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11954 - Karma: 12,297
THAT IS NOT ME, I REPEAT, THAT IS NOT OFFICER GRANITE STATE.THE CREATURE YOU HAVE ON THE SHIP IS INCREDIBLY DANGEROUS. USE CAUTION. PLEASE SEND RESCU POD TO COORDINATES 1312341354N 23435.354234.3 W.
Jul 26 2012 10:31AM
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Dinner420
Posts: 105 - Karma: 61
HO SHIT. THE BEING WAS LAST SEEN IN THE LANDING BAY.

PICTURE OF CREATURE. DRAWN BY LT. KIEFORD OF 0420 UNIT. THIS PICTURE HAS BEEN CONFIRMED WITH GROUNDS CREW IN LANDING BAY 3.

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SHIP IS ON LOCK DOWN. EVERYONE GET YOUR DIMETHYLTRYPTAMINE LAZER PISTOLS LETS GET THEIS BASTARD. DON'T MISTAKE HIME FOR LOOKS. HE HAS BEEN SPOTED EATING SOME OF THE TRICHOMIUM OAR. THIS HAS BEEN OBSERVED TO STRENGTHEN HIM NEUROLOGICALLY AS WELL AS PHYSICALLY. THIS CREATURE IS VERRY AGGRESSIVE TOWARD OTHER BEINGS ESPECIALLY HUMANOIDS. PROCEED WITH EXTREME CAUTION.

OFFICER HANG IN THERE. HOMING DROIDS ALONG WITH A SMALL VESSEL HAVE BEEN SENT TO YOUR LOCATION DO NOT EXIT YOUR PERSONAL MODULE CAPTAIN. WAIT FOR DRIOD ASSISTANCE.
Jul 26 2012 1:17PM
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J_Christoph
Posts: 2519 - Karma: 8,752
^^^^^^^

ALIENS ARE GONNA FUCK YOU ALL
Jul 26 2012 1:29PM
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jtucker29
Posts: 170 - Karma: 9
im so confused rite now...
Jul 26 2012 1:48PM
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Fun_dip
Posts: 2623 - Karma: 913
bump
Dec 30 2012 11:20PM
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malonius_funk
Posts: 2249 - Karma: 1,500
DAY 938-3821-234. FUCKING SHIT IS FUCKED. SHIT GOT FUCKED. I REPEAT FUCK GOT SHIT. ALIEN SUBCRAFTS HAVE TAKEN THE HIGH RANKING OFFICIALS AND RAPED THEIR ARMPITS. NINER FORTY. CRYSTALS HAVE ATTERZ. OH MY FACK SHIT IS FACKED. LT. ANALSECKS IS CAPTIVE. HERO SOLDIER COL. BEEFCAKE IS SWEPT. GET THE FACK!!!!!!!!!
Dec 30 2012 11:27PM
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FerrisBueller
Posts: 8280 - Karma: 5,173
SERGENT BUELLER REPORTING IN GIFFORD AND KEIFORD OF 0420 ARE MIA.

THE CANNABINOID FUEL CELLS ARE RESULTING IN A MAJOR FAILURE OF LEVEL 4 GASEOUS INTERDESPERSION THROUGH THE MICRO QUANTUM MATHEMATICS.

GET THE FUCK OUT OMEGA TEAM 2!!!!!!!!!
Dec 31 2012 12:10AM
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E__
Posts: 5751 - Karma: 4,635
THIS IS BIG BLUE THE NEGRO SENT FROM GROUND CONTROL TO CHECK ON YOU FUCK STICKS AND YOUR MISSION, I MADE IT TIME TO KICK SOME ALIEN ASS, MY THC BURNERS ARE OUT AND ERROR 501 IS PENDING ON MY COMPUTING SYSTEM BUT ONCE WE NEUTRALIZE THE AREA WE CAN MINE FOR THE ORE AND MAKE IT BACK SAFELY! ONCE AGAIN BIG BLUE THE NEGRO SIGNING IN.
Dec 31 2012 12:14AM
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FerrisBueller
Posts: 8280 - Karma: 5,173
10-4 WE HAVE JUST RECEIVED WORD FROM OMEGA 1, 3 AND 4 BUT STILL NO SIGN OF OMEGA TEAM 2.


DELTA-9 SQUAD HAS JUST BEEN SENT AS THE RESCUE SQUAD ON OMEGA 4 ALONG WITH PARATROOPER TEAM LSD-9901




TEAM LSD-9901 DROPPED OUT OF THE BOEING DUAL CHAMBER PARAPLANE AND WAS INSTANTLY TRANSPORTED TO AN EXTRADIMENSIONAL SPACE (OR SO WE BELIEVE) AND ARE CURRENTLY OUT OF CONTACT WITH US, WHILE OMEGA 2 IS STILL MIA




WE HAVE KIA REPORTS OF GIFFORD FROM 0420
Dec 31 2012 12:16AM
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FerrisBueller
Posts: 8280 - Karma: 5,173
BUELLER, FERRIS
SERGENT 3RD CLASS
MARINE SPECIAL OPERATIONS




FIRST PIC RECEIVED FROM LSD-9901

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IT IS THROUGH UNKNOWN WAYS THAT WE REVCED THIS PIC FROM LT. JOHNSON BUT ITS TRACE LOCATION IS FROM THE CONSTELLATION LYRA, NEAR THE STAR VEGA A 19.6 LIGHT YEARS AWAY...AS IF THEY WERE SENT 19.6 YEARS INTO THE PAST TO SEND US A PICTURE OF THE PORTAL THEY CAME THROUGH.



OMEGA 4 IS CURRENTLY UNDER CONTROL OF THE ALIENS AND WERE CAPTURED DURING A THC THRUSTER TESTING SESSION, THEY WERE AMBUSHED OF GAURD.
Dec 31 2012 12:21AM
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James.May
Posts: 494 - Karma: 321
BREAKER BREAKER THIS IS LT.SQUINTY FROM SUPPLY DEPOT DELTA WE ARE IN THE AIR ARE YOU IN NEED OF A RESUPPLY TO CONTINUE WITH THE MISSION OVER.
Dec 31 2012 12:32AM
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Rafiki
Posts: 3858 - Karma: 2,251
Joseph Kony, checkin' in. we still up in dis bitch or wut?
Dec 31 2012 12:38AM
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Heart
Posts: 6156 - Karma: 3,462
AFFIRMATIVE LT. SQUINTY WE ARE IN DIRE NEED OF A RESUPPLY, WE ARE RUNNING EXTREMELY LOW ON FOOD AND FUEL AND REQUIRE IMMEDIATE ASSISTANCE PRIOR TO OUR DEPARTURE FROM EARTH'S ATMOSPHERE. WE WILL NEED 500 KG OF FREEZE DRIED MEALS AND 20,000 LITERS OF SOLID ROCKET FUEL FOR OUR JOURNEY TO THE LITTEBACHUS NEBULA. ARE THERE ANY HOSTILES WE CAN EXPECT TO ENCOUNTER OUR JOURNEY? OVER
Dec 31 2012 12:53AM
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James.May
Posts: 494 - Karma: 321
10-04-20 WE SHALL DEPART TO YOUR IMMEDIATE LOCATION PRONTO, ACCORDING TO OUR DOPE-O-METER IF YOU SET A COURSE AROUND THE BIGBACHUS NEBULA YOU WILL AVOID A LARGE GATHERING OF PIG-STALLION HOSTILE'S GUARDING BUSTPLANET AND STILL PLENTY OF FUEL AND SUPPLIES LEFT FOR THE RETURN JOURNEY WE SHALL EQUIP YOU WITH LIGHT DEFENCE WEAPONS AND EXTRA PRECAUTIONARY SUPPLIES IN THE EVENT OF AN EMERGENCY! OVER.
Dec 31 2012 1:06AM
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mcnamarskiez
Posts: 692 - Karma: 159
.
Dec 31 2012 2:54AM
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Wallisch_pl
Posts: 5260 - Karma: 1,022
I am flipping shit
Dec 31 2012 2:58AM
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Rafiki
Posts: 3858 - Karma: 2,251
REDLEADER REPORTING FOR DOODY AND READY FOR TAKE OFF. ALL SYSTEMS ARE GO, I'LL BE JOININ' Y'ALL SOON

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Feb 3 2013 5:41PM
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deleted5
Posts: 14507 - Karma: 13,507
CAN CYRIL DIE FROM SHUTING DOWN THE TRACTOR BEAM?
Feb 3 2013 5:44PM
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*TURBONERD*
Posts: 15081 - Karma: 9,158
OH FUCK IT"S BACK
Feb 3 2013 6:15PM
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NinetyFour
Posts: 8650 - Karma: 13,409
IS ANYONE AT THE REFUELING DOCK? I NEED 354LBS OF C-10 FISSION FUEL FOR MY NEXT MISSION.
Feb 3 2013 6:24PM
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NinetyFour
Posts: 8650 - Karma: 13,409
AND A SNICKERS.
Feb 3 2013 6:25PM
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whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,103
CHADS GAP HAS BEEN COMPROMISED.
Feb 3 2013 6:55PM
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Rafiki
Posts: 3858 - Karma: 2,251
IM IN ROUTE TO THE REFUELING STATION AND MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE A COSTCO SIZED PALLET OF SNICKERS UP IN THIS BITCH. ILL TRADE YOU FOR WATERMELON FLAVORED LUBE, A BIG MAC AND EVERY VINYL RECORDS YOU HAVE. DO WE HAVE A DEAL
Feb 3 2013 6:59PM
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Mr.Sloth
Posts: 5091 - Karma: 13,469
MR SLOTH HAS ARRIVED
Feb 3 2013 7:19PM
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Joebin
Posts: 1664 - Karma: 867
THE C-17 REACTION CORE IS IN CHECK WERE READY TO INCREASE THRUST.
Feb 3 2013 8:19PM
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NinetyFour
Posts: 8650 - Karma: 13,409
YES WE HAVE A DEAL
Feb 3 2013 9:11PM
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Caspaaa
Posts: 4830 - Karma: 1,466
I'M AN INTERN HERE WHERE DO YOU NEED ME?!
Feb 3 2013 10:39PM
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Rafiki
Posts: 3858 - Karma: 2,251
MAKE SURE THE DILDO CANNONS ARE LOCKED AND LOADED WE MAY HAVE INCOMING BOGEYS IN T-MINUS 47 MINUTES
Feb 3 2013 10:57PM
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Caspaaa
Posts: 4830 - Karma: 1,466
I'M ON IT SEND SOMEONE ELSE TO THE THC FIELDS I HEARD THAT RED-2 IS M-I-A

GET THE SOLDIERS BACK FROM OMEGA-NIG WERE LOSING GROUND ON SECTION ALPHA
Feb 3 2013 11:00PM
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alvy.
Posts: 2134 - Karma: 377
WHAT IN JAH'S NAME IS A CIVIE DOING AT THESE COORDINATES. INTERGALACTIC SPACEKUSH LAW FORBIDS NON-MILITARY FORCES FROM BEING IN THIS SECTOR. DISPATCHING RED-42069 EQUIPPED WITH SATIVA TELEPORTATION SYSTEM. GET THAT CIVIE AND HIS CHILD OUT IMMEDIATELY.

THE ASSAULT BY THE FEDERATION OF UNEDUCATED SQUARES IS COMMENCING-BOOST TRICHOME SHIELDS AND PREPARE THE THC AFTERBURNERS. BRING THE KEIF-BEAM WEAPONS SYSTEM ONLINE AND FORM UP.

-GREEN LEADER OUT-

Feb 4 2013 12:30AM
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rudager
Posts: 11335 - Karma: 4,624
I WAS AT THE REFUELING DOCK, BUT MY BALL MISSED THE PADDLES AND FELL

SPACE CADET BALL 2 CHECKING IN, READY TO LAUNCH
Feb 4 2013 12:45AM
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cbj
Posts: 2114 - Karma: 1,136
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Feb 4 2013 12:48AM
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*TURBONERD*
Posts: 15081 - Karma: 9,158
SPRING LOCKED AND LOADED, BALL LAUNCHING AT FULL POWER
WE'LL GET THE BONUS THIS TIME
Feb 4 2013 1:42AM
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rudager
Posts: 11335 - Karma: 4,624
CADET BALL 2 LAUNCHED AND CHECKING IN

WORM HOLES ARE OPEN AND WEAPONS UPGRADED TO LEVEL 2

BUMPERS HAVE BEEN TAKEN OUT
AWAITING NEXT MISSION
Feb 4 2013 1:59AM
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