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Anorexia is a bitch of disease...

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yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
I'm gonna keep this comparatively short (it would be a few pages typed if i told the full story) and to the point

For the past six months I have been fighting a downward battle with anorexia and two days ago i hit my, what I hope, was the lowest point in my life. I visited the doctor to my weekly weigh in(to monitor my progress with the anorexia) and results were fatal. I slumped to 104 pounds and my heart rate was sitting at 37 bpm on the EKG. At 5 foot 10 inches and being a fully developed man my BMI dipped below 15.

Yesterday i was admitted for inpatient care at a children's hospital where i will spend my Christmas morning getting myself medically stable. I originally had plans to fly to Ireland to attend my Grand-Parents 50th anniversary, but my doctor is worried that my heart won't be able to handle it

I'm mingling with death and I'm really fucking scared to say the least, thank you for listening
Dec 14 2011 7:27AM
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skithesprings
Posts: 9086 - Karma: 1,349
I typed out an enormous response to this, but I decided to delete it and instead ask only this....

If a very religious individual needs an amputation to save his life, but irrationally believes that his body must remain whole, do you find any sympathy for this individual when they die?

If a woman insists on a natural birth and the result is that both her and the baby die during labor, do you pat her on the back and say I'm here for you, I hope you get better?

If a cancer patient refuses simple treatments and dies, do you chastise the people who simply told the patient to take the treatments?

If someone decides to stop breathing and their physical condition worsens because of it, are you sympathetic?

I know this will only result in someone telling me how retarded I am, or saying that I am blind to the truth, or that it's not that simple, but in actuality, it is that simple.

To the OP, take a look at what you have, a family that loves you, friends, skiing, a life where you don't have to worry about having food available. You don't need doctors, treatment, or drugs. You need to stop being selfish and to live your damn life. I wish you the best in your recovery.


Dec 16 2011 10:18AM
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yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
I could take the other comments because they were ignorant comments that had little thought behind them, but what you have to say is just hurting.

I understand what you are saying, but i don't think you exactly understand the what i have gone threw, most people can sympathize for someone in my position and make it negative or positive (the dividing line is very clear in this thread). But when you are able to empathize with someone in my position it is VERY different. You need to understand just how mental this whole thing has been for me.

When you break away from the typical anorexic case (referring to the girls who are anorexic due to the pressure the media creates "The perfect body image") it gets very complicated. This is a very mental disease. 95% of my out patient treatment is focused on anxiety, depression, stress and a little on obsessive behaviors.

I agree it can be very selfish and i am very selfish for allowing this to happen to myself, but i am not convinced you fully understand the disorder
Dec 16 2011 10:56AM
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JWoods
Posts: 2369 - Karma: 2,635
If this is all so mental and they are treating you for certain mental issues such as you said "anxiety, depression, and stress," then why would you post this on Newschoolers, one of the most judgmental corners of the internet? Just so they can reverse all your therapy? I feel like that was a poor decision.
Dec 16 2011 11:15AM
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PANDA_SWAGGA
Posts: 490 - Karma: 16
you know what man? your gonna get fucking through this shit. theres points in life where you find yourself in a low "valley" that you just want to get out of. but guess what, your gonna get out of it no fucking question. your gonna reach the mountain top and your gonna shred. trust me. you got this dude, you'll bounce back and be on the slopes feeling it in know time. no question.
Dec 16 2011 11:35AM
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hey-dude-its-me
Posts: 4238 - Karma: 412
hahahah did nobody else see this? wtf
Dec 16 2011 11:57AM
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PlaygroundRapist
Posts: 1307 - Karma: 26
I know some model girlfriends who have anorexia...in a not so severe form and they are hot.

For a guy having anorexia, thats a bit weird me thinks.
Dec 16 2011 12:24PM
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act.resist
Posts: 8875 - Karma: 513
you're ignorant
Dec 16 2011 1:31PM
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Raz.
Posts: 7456 - Karma: 1,611
this x12
Dec 16 2011 3:23PM
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caliskigirl
Posts: 393 - Karma: 67
Just curious OP....how are you doing? I know it hasn't been long but just hoping that everything is getting better so far :)
Dec 18 2011 11:57PM
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yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
Better day by day. My orthostatic vital test this morning were promising and i might get to leave the hospital within the next few days. I'm not setting a day of discharge yet so I won't be disappointed if I'm not discharged.
Dec 19 2011 9:12AM
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yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
My vitals are good and i can go home!

I'm not allowed to do any strenuous activity (i.e. skiing) for the next week because of my heart. I'm excited to go home, but a little nervous about returning to everyday life. It's going to be stressful
Dec 19 2011 10:10PM
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Jahrassicpark
Posts: 2075 - Karma: 38
Good for you man stoked to see you're better! Keep on getting healthy!

And BonerCrunch shut the fuck up
Dec 19 2011 10:12PM
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yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
I don't think anyone listens to him
Dec 19 2011 10:46PM
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crab_pretzel
Posts: 3919 - Karma: 622
hey man just came here to give some +vibes. i cant imagine having something like this where you are psychologically unable to be healthy. i dont know the details, and im not trying to make it sound bad, just trying to empathize. seriously, get better soon. and i was in disbelief reading comments that included hate. ive read so many misinformed comments on here. just keep your head and I really hope the treatment helps.
Dec 19 2011 10:54PM
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cobra_commander
Posts: 16909 - Karma: 4,686
Click for larger image
Dec 19 2011 11:01PM
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caliskigirl
Posts: 393 - Karma: 67
Congrats! Keep up the good work! I can understand that it's stressful and it will seem difficult at first especially, but keep your chin up and count every little victory, one day at a time. I'm rooting for you and your continued progression back to health :D
Dec 19 2011 11:44PM
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Anathema
Posts: 21048 - Karma: 5,061
hahaha i forgot i posted in here. ohhhhh that's good.

well good luck fixing your brain and shit. crazy people are crazy. depression, add, schizo, anorexia, whatever. you're all just week minded fools -- the kind that obi wan would have walked up to and pulled the old "these aren't the droids we're looking for" mind control trick and you'd be at the mercy of his will.


Dec 19 2011 11:51PM
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FBGM
Posts: 8184 - Karma: 2,677
I guess I just noticed this thread but I spent four months in ED recovery last year...if you want to talk, PM me, I'm definitely open to listen/talk/be supportive of you.
Dec 19 2011 11:53PM
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cobra_commander
Posts: 16909 - Karma: 4,686
Erectile Disfunction?
Dec 20 2011 12:17AM
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FBGM
Posts: 8184 - Karma: 2,677
yep
Dec 20 2011 12:18AM
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Anathema
Posts: 21048 - Karma: 5,061
i love it. i couldn't help but smile and nosebreathe laugh for like a minute straight
Dec 20 2011 12:43AM
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Raz.
Posts: 7456 - Karma: 1,611
I missed this before, but this is a solid post. very solid.
Dec 20 2011 1:29AM
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tj.hall
Posts: 681 - Karma: 37
Disregard the pre-teens on this website.

I can understand what you're going through dude. I know a few people with the disease and it's tough.. Honestly, I think I've battled with it at times. But just stay strong on your path to recovery. You have lots of people out there who love you, I'm sure.

+vibes.
Dec 20 2011 1:35AM
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cobra_commander
Posts: 16909 - Karma: 4,686
If he is not black can he still reach the mountain top?


STOP FUCKING BITCHING. EITHER FUCKING GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER OR GO FUCKING STARVE TO DEATH. ITS YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM, FUCKING DEAL WITH IT.
Dec 20 2011 1:42AM
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FBGM
Posts: 8184 - Karma: 2,677
I'm glad you enjoy that
Dec 20 2011 4:22AM
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Steezy_IN_KC
Posts: 2033 - Karma: 1,607
Best of luck you you sir... all the vibes. Its difficult to admit that you have an issue like anorexia, but its something that you have to identify so you can recover.

This semester I had to make an image heavy informative video about a topic and i choose anorexia in men. This video doesn't do justice at all but it might help informed some of the kids that don't understand it. Its a mental condition, typically developed with a traumatic experience (not alway) that makes becoming skinny your passion that consumes most of your thoughts.

Here is the video, keep in mind i had less than a week to learn about the topic and make a image based video.
Vibes and best of luck on your road to recovery!
Dec 20 2011 4:48AM
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ALaw
Posts: 2616 - Karma: 1,552
First world problems
Dec 20 2011 6:16AM
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yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
So it's been a month since i first entered the hospital and three weeks out of the hospital a quick update here:

Visited the doctor today and my weight isn't improving and my heart rate is back in the upper 30s. I'm probably gonna be going back into the hospital at the end of the month and spending two weeks. It's good though because i will be going to Denver and this will set me up for an outpatient team in Colorado. Meaning that i will be living in Colorado after I get out, a much needed change of scenery is really gonna be helpful i think.

This is really a bitch of a disease, recovery is slow but I'm trying to stay positive.
Jan 13 2012 10:50PM
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FBGM
Posts: 8184 - Karma: 2,677
Good luck, stay positive!
Jan 13 2012 10:59PM
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special_k10101
Posts: 1498 - Karma: 72
good luck man. we all wish you the best.
Jan 14 2012 11:12AM
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infedel_one
Posts: 5140 - Karma: 444
jeezus i dont get how this can be. havent u had yer wake up call?! after yer first bout and trip to the hospital i feel like it didnt change anything and you are still letting the disease control your life. it may be mental but YOU HAVE TO FORCE YOURSELF TO EAT! i hope u can battle this.
Jan 14 2012 11:23AM
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yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
I hear what you are saying. I'm in the Childrens hospital at denver now in the EDU. I feel really lost here

Some of these poor girls are really struggling with there EDs. They will sit there and not eat their food in the 30 minutes allotted. They just get feeding tube for 150% the nutrional value of what they didn't.

I came to the EDU to get help and fight the disease through intense therapy. It's helping A LOT, but it's also so terribly sad to see such intelligent people struggle with an eating disorder. All the girls in here are extremely intelligent and creative.

I am ironically dealing with a stomach flu and don't have the energy to type out a full update, but i will get to it later today or tomorrow.
Feb 4 2012 9:49AM
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Willgum
Posts: 3254 - Karma: 3,066
Good luck. Like someone else said in this thread, its like telling someone who's depressed to go out and be happy. Its just not that simple
Feb 4 2012 2:29PM
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ChuckTesta
Posts: 960 - Karma: 258
GUYS!!! THIS NEWS JUST IN!!! JWOODS IS A FUCKING RETARD
Feb 4 2012 2:46PM
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cobra_commander
Posts: 16909 - Karma: 4,686
two things:

They are obviously not intelligent enough to eat.

Is creative the new P.C. term for fucked up in the head?
Feb 5 2012 11:37PM
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Ruffles
Posts: 1132 - Karma: 29
Wait depression is a disease? I don't understand...
Feb 6 2012 12:01AM
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yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
Keep hating. It's very entertaining!
Feb 6 2012 12:02PM
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act.resist
Posts: 8875 - Karma: 513
my god

just leave.
Feb 6 2012 12:09PM
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cobra_commander
Posts: 16909 - Karma: 4,686
I am sure you are totally capable of picking up a pizza, taking a bite, and getting it down To your stomach.
Either start eating, or just starve to death.

I am no shrink, but I would say that this thread, along with your self induced starvation, speaks to your pathetic need for sympathy from others. This probably is due to a lack of compassion from others. I don't know whether it is because mommy never loved you, you are gay, or got raped by the family dog when you were liitle, and I dont care. Pick your vagina off the ground and solve your own problems with out looking for sympathy or atta' boy comments from others. You will only get addicted to the sympathy.
Feb 6 2012 12:56PM
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yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
Go on... I'm really interested to hear why you're upset with me
Feb 6 2012 1:58PM
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cobra_commander
Posts: 16909 - Karma: 4,686
I'm not. I'm just telling you to stop being a bitch, and highlighting one of your issues. I just don't suger coat life.
Feb 6 2012 2:07PM
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Miles.Spencer
Posts: 76 - Karma: 21
I'm really sorry man to her about that. I hope you'll be ok.
Feb 6 2012 2:27PM
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mackattack
Posts: 581 - Karma: 10
Unfortunately it's not something people just snap out of. It's changing how you think about food, your image, and whatever else in your life is at the root of the disease. I have struggled with it for years, and it's difficult to go even an hour without thinking about food, how I look, or what I could do to change my appearance. My best friend just recently was released from a treatment facility down in Santa Monica.
Be supportive of those struggling with it, and my best advice is to take each day as it comes. I am thinking of you and your road to recovery.

People, don't be so quick to judge something you have never experienced, especially since you all likely know someone who has or is currently struggling with some form of an eating disorder.
Feb 6 2012 2:48PM
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canterbury
Posts: 2382 - Karma: 55
Seriously, what would your mother think if she were to see what you are typing to a young man who has realized his serious problems, taken steps to correct them, and is reaching out to an internet community for help, support, and understanding. Your apparent lack of empathy is bordering on sociopathic.
Feb 6 2012 3:45PM
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twin-tip-hero
Posts: 2896 - Karma: 277
Sorry about this video but I just had to. But really man best of luck to you. And may I suggest Taco Bell. If you have never had it, you must try it. You will want that shit to stay in you forever .
Feb 6 2012 3:50PM
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daskis
Posts: 1828 - Karma: 356
I've had several friends go through this... hang in there, bud. It got really scary at times, but you'll pull through. Have hope and faith, work hard, and stay strong. Vibes. Get well.
Feb 6 2012 3:52PM
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.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
In honestly makes me sick to see how stupid some people are. Holy fuck.
Feb 6 2012 3:54PM
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cobra_commander
Posts: 16909 - Karma: 4,686
yup, dumb enough to not eat when they are hungry
Feb 6 2012 3:56PM
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daskis
Posts: 1828 - Karma: 356
You clearly don't know someone close to you that has struggled through this.

Don't be an ignorant asshole. OP is going through enough pain... how can you say something like this?
Feb 6 2012 3:57PM
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.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
Ok, be honest. Which parent tried to smother you when they found out you had Down's Syndrome?
Feb 6 2012 3:59PM
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