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sex stories

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bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
i jsut had my first 3 some. i can't say i've ever had one, until this past week. but my god that's a fun time. at first, it wasn't going the way i wanted it cuz they were fooling around with each other and i was pretty much jsut watching two girls get down and nasty. then they needed some dick and it got a little better. by the end my girly got all jealous and we had to get another cock over at the apartment. but they were mine up until he showed up. very fun.


[Necro - Get On Ya Knees]
I'll hit that pussy up with a nasty attack
Get on your knees like your looking for the last piece of crack
Filthy like Al Louis, jerking off at seventy
Or senerity, swallowing my twenty inches of obscenity
I'm paying a good buck
So slut, you better fuck as good as you look and suck as good as you fuck
When it comes to this porn shit you know who the master is
Bitch I'll leave Necro tagged on your ass with jizz
Aug 31 2004 12:03PM
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TheWorst
Posts: 7883 - Karma: 17
^ i'd let another girl touch my girlfriend... but she'd have to be hot...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When your not sure about something, just HUCK IT!
Sep 4 2004 1:04PM
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punk_rider
Posts: 2327 - Karma: 10
^funny! but that's all
Sep 4 2004 1:25PM
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dg101
Posts: 3216 - Karma: 10
yea man no guy would ever touch my gf id kick the fuck out of him
________________
Freeski live to ryde
Sep 4 2004 1:42PM
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Girays_Brother
Posts: 13973 - Karma: 1,636
i agree
___________________

I HATE NEW YORK PRODUCTIONS
i hate new york trailer
Sep 4 2004 1:45PM
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bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
you guys need to read my first post on the other page.....it was a 3-some....then my girl got jealous and the other guy was called to show up for the other girl. so it became two 2-some's in separate rooms.

so yes i had my 3-some, with no guys and it wasn't a problem. my goodness. however i did walk around naked in front of the other guy haha. it was so weird, but so much fun at the same time. and why would my girl friend be a huge slut if she allowed me to be with another girl with her....she make sout with this girl all the time. they've been friends since they were 21 or so, something like 3 years.


[ Slug ]

You look like you were built for me; You talk like you want to steal my drink
You kiss like you already came; And that's a lift to pull a line for those with out any game

It's like damn baby; You know you can't save me
But you should still tell your people that your leaving with the band; Maybe you can show me your hustle
Neither one of us would be so lonely; If only you would come over here and hold me
I caught you trying to hide your smile behind your glass; But all of your secrets become a swing set when you laugh
And all of your regrets that you're carrying a burying; Don't mean a damn thing if there's nobody to share them with

We've been following each other all night now; We ought to be all over each other like right now
I don't like crowds lets take flight now; Cause that face that you make
Reminds me of my life now.

reppin' 720.30.3970 playa
Sep 4 2004 2:10PM
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punk_rider
Posts: 2327 - Karma: 10
your gf is a slut, you have no respect for yourself, .... if this story is true. ( hope it's not)
Sep 4 2004 2:14PM
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bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
if ya wanna hear something really fucked up, she's going to a sex toy party and buying a dildoe for when i move away. but tonight i get to break it in on her for the first time. she said she was gonna get a big one....it's gonna be so much fun...maybe i can offer some double penitration...mmm yea. i might become jealous of the dildoe though, i think it's going to be a little bit bigger than me. (and she said i was the perfect size, that lying slut!, haha) but really i'm pretty stoked on this. it's the kinkiest girl i've ever been with. most would be like 'ewwww'. this one at least is open minded to any suggestion i make. (i mentioned the 3-some, with-in the week it happened)


[ Slug ]

You look like you were built for me; You talk like you want to steal my drink
You kiss like you already came; And that's a lift to pull a line for those with out any game

It's like damn baby; You know you can't save me
But you should still tell your people that your leaving with the band; Maybe you can show me your hustle
Neither one of us would be so lonely; If only you would come over here and hold me
I caught you trying to hide your smile behind your glass; But all of your secrets become a swing set when you laugh
And all of your regrets that you're carrying a burying; Don't mean a damn thing if there's nobody to share them with

We've been following each other all night now; We ought to be all over each other like right now
I don't like crowds lets take flight now; Cause that face that you make
Reminds me of my life now.

reppin' 720.30.3970 playa
Sep 4 2004 2:14PM
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kyle_w
Posts: 6805 - Karma: 23
id love to have a g/f like that, if they have a dildo maybe she wouldnt crawl up our asses so much
Sep 4 2004 2:17PM
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kyle_w
Posts: 6805 - Karma: 23
o and this one is great, my friend was bored one day so he wen to his neighbors house, her parents werent home so he figured hed hang with her, well turns out she was already gettin it on with another guy when he got there, and he walked in the room on em, an when she saw him she screamed ' take it out take it out, it hurts' i was laugin my ass off when i heard that story
Sep 4 2004 2:19PM
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punk_rider
Posts: 2327 - Karma: 10
sick sad world .... poor of us ...
Sep 4 2004 2:20PM
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ESB
Posts: 9274 - Karma: 10,648
I used to work at this golf resort and there was this diggin hot chick, a single mom about two years older than me who worked the front desk. She had a crush on me and so when she had to go clean the pool every night she'd ask me to come and help her even though she didn't need any help. I didn't have anything else to do so I did that every night with her. Eventually one day after work she gave me a ride home but we took a detour and ended up getting it on in the car. After that, every night we'd go to clean the pool, and after everyone was out of the pool and the doors were locked we'd get it on in the fucking bathroom, going as fast as we could because we were on the clock and had to be back in like 15 minutes.

Since she worked the front desk she also knew which rooms in the hotel were occupied and which were empty, so one day after we both got off work at 11pm she snagged a room key to an empty room and we hit it up in there. It was dope.

Stacie: 'Aren't you going to open your gift?'
Wayne: 'If it's a severed head, I'm going to be very upset.'
Sep 4 2004 2:32PM
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kyle_w
Posts: 6805 - Karma: 23
hell yes^
Sep 4 2004 2:35PM
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punk_rider
Posts: 2327 - Karma: 10
who cares?
Sep 4 2004 2:48PM
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bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
that's a good one kami


[ Slug ]

You look like you were built for me; You talk like you want to steal my drink
You kiss like you already came; And that's a lift to pull a line for those with out any game

It's like damn baby; You know you can't save me
But you should still tell your people that your leaving with the band; Maybe you can show me your hustle
Neither one of us would be so lonely; If only you would come over here and hold me
I caught you trying to hide your smile behind your glass; But all of your secrets become a swing set when you laugh
And all of your regrets that you're carrying a burying; Don't mean a damn thing if there's nobody to share them with

We've been following each other all night now; We ought to be all over each other like right now
I don't like crowds lets take flight now; Cause that face that you make
Reminds me of my life now.

reppin' 720.30.3970 playa
Sep 4 2004 2:48PM
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punk_rider
Posts: 2327 - Karma: 10
if everyone talks about his sexual experiences, it's gonna be a endless thread ...
Sep 4 2004 2:52PM
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bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
oh and punk_rider....you need to loosen up and have fun with your sex life. in a couple of years you'll be going to sex toy parties and getting it on with other girls too, and if you don't.....you're not gonna be that interesting of a lay.....ya gotta make it so the guy remembers you.


[ Slug ]

You look like you were built for me; You talk like you want to steal my drink
You kiss like you already came; And that's a lift to pull a line for those with out any game

It's like damn baby; You know you can't save me
But you should still tell your people that your leaving with the band; Maybe you can show me your hustle
Neither one of us would be so lonely; If only you would come over here and hold me
I caught you trying to hide your smile behind your glass; But all of your secrets become a swing set when you laugh
And all of your regrets that you're carrying a burying; Don't mean a damn thing if there's nobody to share them with

We've been following each other all night now; We ought to be all over each other like right now
I don't like crowds lets take flight now; Cause that face that you make
Reminds me of my life now.

reppin' 720.30.3970 playa
Sep 4 2004 2:53PM
0 0
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bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
and in every reply you sound jealius, not getting any? tell us a story


[ Slug ]

You look like you were built for me; You talk like you want to steal my drink
You kiss like you already came; And that's a lift to pull a line for those with out any game

It's like damn baby; You know you can't save me
But you should still tell your people that your leaving with the band; Maybe you can show me your hustle
Neither one of us would be so lonely; If only you would come over here and hold me
I caught you trying to hide your smile behind your glass; But all of your secrets become a swing set when you laugh
And all of your regrets that you're carrying a burying; Don't mean a damn thing if there's nobody to share them with

We've been following each other all night now; We ought to be all over each other like right now
I don't like crowds lets take flight now; Cause that face that you make
Reminds me of my life now.

reppin' 720.30.3970 playa
Sep 4 2004 2:54PM
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bleu-rodeo
Posts: 384 - Karma: 10
haha all these stories are awesome..i have a few but i thought this one was funny..actually 2 stories..
i went to this party with my buddy kat right and she met this guy there...like 20mins later they dissapared for like 30mins i guess? w/e when she got back she seemed all pissed and i was like what happend..and she was like well we drove around the corner and got it on in the back seat of his shit box car..im like soo how was it? and what happend was wen they got going she was riding him but he started thrusting and her head was hitting the roof of the car so she got all pissed ahahaha ooh man. and the same night one of my friends hooked up with this dude and they went into the bathroom and what ahpend was she ate like 6 pieces of pizza before we were all hungry from watching porn mind you...that wen she was in the shitter with this guy she went to give him head but she deeped thorat to early and threw up all over the guy and after i had to go to the bathroom so i walked in and it reaked of puke and pizza i walked right back out but i was laughing so hard wen she told me bwhaha oooh man
Ladies, always remeber the 4 F's....
Find them,Feel them,Fuck them,Forget them
-Hopass/sabrinaP.

-I beat my dick like it owes me money, son
-AndrewDal.-classic
Sep 4 2004 2:54PM
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punk_rider
Posts: 2327 - Karma: 10
i'm 25, got the greatest girlfriend on earth, had a great day today with her, we are doin' hot stuffs, so hot stuffs, but , i mean, i will not talk about it! isn't that normal ?
Sep 4 2004 2:54PM
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bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
uh this isn't tlaking about it....this is an internet forum that doesn't exist in the life, this is thoughts in your head.....i mean come on you fuckin sissy, you sound like a little fairy. i thought you were a girl, but knowing you're a guy...what the fuck is wrong with you. go to the eiffel tower or something frenchy


[ Slug ]

You look like you were built for me; You talk like you want to steal my drink
You kiss like you already came; And that's a lift to pull a line for those with out any game

It's like damn baby; You know you can't save me
But you should still tell your people that your leaving with the band; Maybe you can show me your hustle
Neither one of us would be so lonely; If only you would come over here and hold me
I caught you trying to hide your smile behind your glass; But all of your secrets become a swing set when you laugh
And all of your regrets that you're carrying a burying; Don't mean a damn thing if there's nobody to share them with

We've been following each other all night now; We ought to be all over each other like right now
I don't like crowds lets take flight now; Cause that face that you make
Reminds me of my life now.

reppin' 720.30.3970 playa
Sep 4 2004 2:59PM
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punk_rider
Posts: 2327 - Karma: 10
ok about the virtual stuff. but it's funny to see what this world thinks about ...
funny to see how are people on the web...
i'm a man, so what? i just do not see sex as a game. but don't think i'm soooo serious! but i had an interesting conversation with a guy on NS who felt stupid and unnormal coz he didn't want to have sew at his age, and with a girl he 'd leave 1 year later. i just made him understand that sex is least important thing in life. honestly, i find that a relationship with a girl is soooo much better before. that's all. but you can f*** who you want , make videos and put it on NS, i do not care man, ... for you
Sep 4 2004 3:05PM
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bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
hey that's not a bad idea....we should have ns amature porn contests.

i'm only 19 buddy, sex is most definately a game...i'm not going to be looking for a relationship for a while. i'm looking for fun, and there is nothing wrng with a fun relationship.

when you have a wife you're going to want to have some kinky shit going on with her, until she's a mom. then you think 'oh that's my kids mother, digusting....'

anyway, enough of the talk about you.....lets hear some more sex tales...


[ Slug ]

You look like you were built for me; You talk like you want to steal my drink
You kiss like you already came; And that's a lift to pull a line for those with out any game

It's like damn baby; You know you can't save me
But you should still tell your people that your leaving with the band; Maybe you can show me your hustle
Neither one of us would be so lonely; If only you would come over here and hold me
I caught you trying to hide your smile behind your glass; But all of your secrets become a swing set when you laugh
And all of your regrets that you're carrying a burying; Don't mean a damn thing if there's nobody to share them with

We've been following each other all night now; We ought to be all over each other like right now
I don't like crowds lets take flight now; Cause that face that you make
Reminds me of my life now.

reppin' 720.30.3970 playa
Sep 4 2004 3:08PM
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kyle_w
Posts: 6805 - Karma: 23
'we should have ns amature porn contests. ' haha the funniest thing ive heard all day
Sep 4 2004 3:10PM
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dg101
Posts: 3216 - Karma: 10
HAHA word up ^
________________
Freeski live to ryde
Sep 4 2004 3:23PM
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hotchiklover
Posts: 156 - Karma: 10
i find 3 some disgusting.
but with my gf, we practice face, butt, boobs, mouth, bak, vulv ejaculation. she swallow. she do not lik doggy coz it hurts, she suck, we make videos and fotos, ... it's cool
Sep 4 2004 3:38PM
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TheWorst
Posts: 7883 - Karma: 17
thanks for sharing^
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When your not sure about something, just HUCK IT!
Sep 4 2004 7:02PM
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dg101
Posts: 3216 - Karma: 10
it would be quite an experience
________________
Freeski live to ryde
Sep 4 2004 7:47PM
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unnatural
Posts: 531 - Karma: 9
most girls will say they hate doing most shit, but once you get them in the mood they will open up a little more, or just get them drunk...for some reason it only takes like 2 beers
Sep 4 2004 8:54PM
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PocketRocketRipper
Posts: 3193 - Karma: 9
that's because all girls are lightweights

*NORTHEAST CULT*

check out Stept...
Sep 4 2004 9:05PM
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bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
and when they're drunk they get all skanky, it's fuckin' hot. Love type of sex is always good, but when you jsut wanna fuck, skanky sex is such a turn on.


[ Slug ]

You look like you were built for me; You talk like you want to steal my drink
You kiss like you already came; And that's a lift to pull a line for those with out any game

It's like damn baby; You know you can't save me
But you should still tell your people that your leaving with the band; Maybe you can show me your hustle
Neither one of us would be so lonely; If only you would come over here and hold me
I caught you trying to hide your smile behind your glass; But all of your secrets become a swing set when you laugh
And all of your regrets that you're carrying a burying; Don't mean a damn thing if there's nobody to share them with

We've been following each other all night now; We ought to be all over each other like right now
I don't like crowds lets take flight now; Cause that face that you make
Reminds me of my life now.

reppin' 720.30.3970 playa
Sep 4 2004 9:21PM
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kyle_w
Posts: 6805 - Karma: 23
omg so i was just outside in my neighborhood with these 3 hot chicks, and the hot one was like im in the mood to suck a dick, so i was like ok, so she starts goin at it, and wouldnt you know it she stops half way through and says jesus this is taking forever and just gave up, talk about a case of blue balls
Sep 4 2004 9:22PM
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bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
what the fuck......did you tell her that if she could make you cum, you'd do her?


[ Slug ]

You look like you were built for me; You talk like you want to steal my drink
You kiss like you already came; And that's a lift to pull a line for those with out any game

It's like damn baby; You know you can't save me
But you should still tell your people that your leaving with the band; Maybe you can show me your hustle
Neither one of us would be so lonely; If only you would come over here and hold me
I caught you trying to hide your smile behind your glass; But all of your secrets become a swing set when you laugh
And all of your regrets that you're carrying a burying; Don't mean a damn thing if there's nobody to share them with

We've been following each other all night now; We ought to be all over each other like right now
I don't like crowds lets take flight now; Cause that face that you make
Reminds me of my life now.

reppin' 720.30.3970 playa
Sep 4 2004 9:31PM
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kyle_w
Posts: 6805 - Karma: 23
no it was bull shit shes like i dont feel good im gonna go home i was like you bitch, shes comin down here to get me at 11:30 so ill like cock slap her ass and poke her in the eye, and she can finish me off

Sep 4 2004 9:32PM
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PocketRocketRipper
Posts: 3193 - Karma: 9
^save the eye poke for afterwards, just a tip from the ladykiller

*NORTHEAST CULT*

check out Stept...
Sep 4 2004 9:34PM
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kyle_w
Posts: 6805 - Karma: 23
right after i bust a lod on her lips
Sep 4 2004 9:36PM
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Bob_Loblaw
Posts: 8384 - Karma: 38
thats happened to me before. at a party, she just left right in the middle. i didnt even get a chance to say anything. so i finished myself, used a tissue to clean up, went and found her and rubbed it on her face.
----------------------
A handjob's the man's job. Yo job's a blowjob.
Sep 4 2004 10:24PM
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Bangor
Posts: 9599 - Karma: 129
aaaaaahhhhhhahahahahhh!!!!! ahahhahaha, that's the funniest thing i've heard in, well, since the amature porn contest!!!!!
___________________

- Ian
That's Mr. Bangor to you!

~~Phunkin Phatt Phreerider~~
Sep 4 2004 10:35PM
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kyle_w
Posts: 6805 - Karma: 23
ok so the bitch didnt come get me, so her friend just did the job for her
Sep 4 2004 11:04PM
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trevorwoulddoit
Posts: 6153 - Karma: 199
^I call bullshiznat



Warning: If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have other things to do? Is your life so empty that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with authority that you give respect and credence to all who claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think everything you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told you should want? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex (or same sex if you prefer). Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic.
You have been warned…
Sep 4 2004 11:10PM
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kyle_w
Posts: 6805 - Karma: 23
no actually not she is supposedly sick, so her friend came down and told me
Sep 4 2004 11:13PM
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trevorwoulddoit
Posts: 6153 - Karma: 199
Oh, you made it sound like her friend just came and finished you off.



Warning: If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have other things to do? Is your life so empty that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with authority that you give respect and credence to all who claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think everything you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told you should want? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex (or same sex if you prefer). Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic.
You have been warned…
Sep 4 2004 11:15PM
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elliekay999
Posts: 13 - Karma: 15
fun.... thrrrrr
Dec 3 2007 1:43PM
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-NY-STeeZE-
Posts: 2114 - Karma: 23
"POST CLAIM HERE"
Dec 3 2007 1:48PM
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=FLO=
Posts: 1969 - Karma: 39
I cant quote, but read Funkengruven$ s post about 9 up, i really hope that is true, best thing i have ever heard
Dec 3 2007 5:18PM
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KramerC
Posts: 619 - Karma: 21
Holy fuck. That kids story that was about whistler bc  tripped me out. That stroy was crazy good.
Dec 3 2007 6:25PM
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EastcoastAR5
Posts: 2721 - Karma: 15
Easily the greatest post I have ever laid my eyes on. You remind me of Jim Anchower from the Onion
http://www.theonion.com/content/columnists/view/anchower
Dec 3 2007 9:00PM
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