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Dumping multiple times a day

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TechnoPotamus
Posts: 11626 - Karma: 3,522
is it normal? is it awesome (yes). does nature call anyone else frequently? what is the reasoning behind this mythical daily ritual?

somebody drop some knowledge bombs on me. no pun intended.


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i'm actually not, but i would if i could. /idiotic thread that i'm serious about
Sep 27 2011 4:11PM
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whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,105
woo i have a lot to say when when it comes to this.
i NEVER take shits outside, except once.
i just flew from miami to DIA, and whatever i ate in miami in the afternoon already got my stomach riled up. it was at night, nine O clock probably, and the plane food didn't fill me up enough, so i went to taco bell and got a cheesy ass burrito. i don't know if it was the beans or the cheese or the beef, but i had the WORST stomachache RIGHT AFTER i finished it. i HAD to shit. so i went to the bathroom, but i only poped out a cockeroach. it still hurt.
turns out i just had enormous amounts of fart, i let out a baloon's worth of air on one fart on the ride to our hotel, and another one about the same size once we got there. they were just quiet puffers, didn't smell, but damn they were big.

ok, back to topic. i usually shit once every 2-3 days, but my dad is the opposite. he shits 2-3 times a day.
when i went to china this summer, the first two weeks were brutal. i couldn't shit but it just kept brewing, and that happens for like 4 to 6 days to a point where i JUST CAN'T keep it in any longer. when it got to that, i sit down for a painful session of diarrhea-globs-gel-flush-repeat. yea really, some of it felt like gel coming out. any frequent travelers got the same thing happening to them?

and wow, am i gassy today. my pot is expecting a big one
Sep 27 2011 11:06PM
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B-runge
Posts: 16558 - Karma: 361
what the fuck is wrong with you^
Sep 27 2011 11:32PM
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Skinsummer
Posts: 186 - Karma: 13
I usually shit 2-3 times a day. On race days I usually shit 5+ times before the race.
Sep 28 2011 12:17AM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,273
you are not normal. you are not like the other kids. that does not make you special. it just makes you weird.
Sep 28 2011 5:46AM
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Static
Posts: 8562 - Karma: 4,137
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Sep 28 2011 6:23AM
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Gypsy_Skier
Posts: 2666 - Karma: 5,237
I once took 4 shits in 1 day! i still have the underwear from said day to prove. u can count the layers of blood on them..
Sep 28 2011 7:46AM
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Dosh
Posts: 1818 - Karma: 14
do you have an ibd or something?
Sep 28 2011 9:21AM
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Dosh
Posts: 1818 - Karma: 14
i'm brewing my impending dump right now. gonna let it mature for maximum ease, otherwise i might run into problems. usually i eat breakfast, drink a cup of coffee, a glass of water, eat a banana or orange, then i wait until maximum urge. i think today i will bring some reading material with me. i haven't read while shitting in a long time, because i used to have that habit and ended up with really bad hemorrhoids because i would sit reading and shitting for like an hour. but i will see how it goes today. american psycho should be good dump-reading. i think reading/shitting for about 10 mins should be just right. i really wanna get it all out in one shot today, or otherwise like some people have mentioned, i might have to shit a few more times today to take care of everything.
Sep 28 2011 9:28AM
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seward
Posts: 5233 - Karma: 2,174
its not hard. just take a look into the bowl, aim your anus, and bombs away.

sometimes if the bowl is really small i tuck my nuts out of the way for a better look at the bowl, kinda like a parascope if you will.

and occasionally, if its like a nasty public toilet, i wont quite sit on the stall, but stand up a little so your ass isnt touching the seat. the added height when dropping bombs can REALLY cause some damage. just watch for splash back shrapnel.

for added bonus i pretend my piss is machine gun fire and try to machine gun logs (ships) in half. its all fun till the smell gets ya, chemical warfare man, it can be brutal.

this one time i had a great shit going, screws were really tight that day, and i dropped a bomb right on a ship, and instead of breaking it in half, it like formed together, and made like a giant floating T. is was pretty much the most memorable shit i have ever taken. The Germans won that day.
Sep 28 2011 9:29AM
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Dosh
Posts: 1818 - Karma: 14
do you take fiber supplements? it's all about the soluble fiber with an ibd. insoluble fiber from like the skins of fruit and whole wheat stuff can make it even worse, so it's better to avoid that fiber. fiber from psyllium seeds (metamucil) or methylcellulose (citrucel) can really help out for anyone with problems while shitting. it really bulks/gels things up for maximum ease when taken consistently.
Sep 28 2011 9:33AM
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PeaceCoastLove
Posts: 291 - Karma: 47

everything i eat comes right back out me. it's the best.

Sep 28 2011 10:16AM
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Raz.
Posts: 7456 - Karma: 1,611
my doctor told me I need to eat as much fiber as I possibly can, otherwise I'll start shitting blood again. no idea how or why, but its working
Sep 28 2011 11:34AM
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Flying~Squirrel
Posts: 6494 - Karma: 192
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Sep 28 2011 11:44AM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,488
I poop right when I wake up then around 3 and then usually 7 ish
Sep 28 2011 11:48AM
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DUKES
Posts: 5150 - Karma: 691
my record for holding in the brown matter is 7 days. the day the shit came i had to standup and flush multiple times since the poo was immense
Sep 28 2011 12:26PM
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Lord.Quasimoto
Posts: 958 - Karma: 33
usually once, sometimes twice. most of the time in the mornings. sometimes an afternoon dump as well. nothing yet today though.. must be brewing an afternooner, will update thread with progress.
Sep 28 2011 1:58PM
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BmoChop
Posts: 2071 - Karma: 96
On the topic of bodily functions, today i burped six huuuge burps in a row, capped off with a hell of a fart.....i applauded myself.
Sep 28 2011 7:55PM
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Lord.Quasimoto
Posts: 958 - Karma: 33
huge belch / huge fart at the same time and you are on easy street.
Sep 29 2011 10:02AM
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TechnoPotamus
Posts: 11626 - Karma: 3,522
so many sigworthy comments here
Sep 29 2011 10:07AM
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whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,105
also, don't you just hate it when you have the tip of a poop sticking out but there's just no pushing power? then i'd have to use half a roll of paper to make a reliable glove and pluck it out.. i fucking dread that, it happens every other month or so
Sep 29 2011 10:40AM
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seward
Posts: 5233 - Karma: 2,174
i would be honoured and semi sexually excited to be in your sig.
Sep 29 2011 10:53AM
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TechnoPotamus
Posts: 11626 - Karma: 3,522
done and done
Sep 29 2011 11:10AM
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seward
Posts: 5233 - Karma: 2,174
i would have figured youd pick the german comment.

what a monumental day, a spot in technopotamus sig does not come easy. my life is now complete.
Sep 29 2011 11:16AM
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malonius_funk
Posts: 2249 - Karma: 1,500
this one time i shit 7 times in one day. i had eaten some bad food and it was hot and extremely humid and i was skating and i used the same public restroom seven times. i straight bukkakied that fucking toilet with my shit. my cornhole was donzo afterwards.
Sep 29 2011 11:36AM
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seward
Posts: 5233 - Karma: 2,174
thats the worst.

sometimes when my asshole hurts so bad i just dont even bother wiping. why add to the pain when you can just have shitty undies and be done with it.
Oct 1 2011 1:34PM
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Heart
Posts: 6156 - Karma: 3,462
cant tell if trolling... i really hope you dont do that
Oct 13 2011 9:14PM
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jamers
Posts: 1311 - Karma: 164
irritable bowl syndrome causes it, that or too much coffee
Oct 13 2011 9:19PM
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theWIZARD
Posts: 935 - Karma: 76
Has anyone ever released a massive turd and upon flushing the toilet you go to examine your masterpiece, and its GONE?!
Oct 13 2011 9:19PM
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malonius_funk
Posts: 2249 - Karma: 1,500
ahhhhh yes the ol' toasty ghosty
Oct 13 2011 9:23PM
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NinetyFour
Posts: 8650 - Karma: 13,411
If you wanna mess with people you need to use a technique called the top shelf. You get sitting right on the ledge of the can, or hovering above for extra winningness, and you wanna shit on the dry part of the bowl at the front. If you do this enough times with a good amount of aimed hits, you will be leaving some skidmarks like tokyo drift, and they won't flush off easy. I usually go 1-2 times a day.
Oct 13 2011 9:40PM
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Saac
Posts: 767 - Karma: 333
this. the more coffee i drink the bigger and the poops i take
Oct 13 2011 9:41PM
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seward
Posts: 5233 - Karma: 2,174
other times when im out jogging, and i have to shit, but have a good pace going, i dont even bother stoping, i just let it go mannnnnn.
Oct 17 2011 9:10AM
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