Member of the Month

KilaTsunami
October, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

Your job title VS. Reality

profile picture
Jaymon
Posts: 860 - Karma: 1,213
Employer: LTEarth services

Job Title: Head of trails and groundwork

Reality: I cut roots for 11 hours a day.



copy the format above and let's see what the jobs you guys work are really like
Jul 5 2011 11:25PM
0 0
profile picture
AWALLRUS.
Posts: 5762 - Karma: 223
this
Jul 6 2011 12:39PM
0 0
profile picture
HermioneGranger
Posts: 1933 - Karma: 101
Title: Student Researcher
Reality: I do scientific/historical research, bitches!
Jul 6 2011 12:40PM
0 0
profile picture
Astomp
Posts: 10090 - Karma: 344
Military

title - Health Care Specialist


work - combat medic
Jul 6 2011 1:53PM
0 0
profile picture
skiP.E.I.
Posts: 7821 - Karma: 21,850
Employer: Anderson&Yates Forest Consultants Inc.
Title: Tree Planter
Reality: Poke a hole in the ground and stick a tree in it 2000 + times each day in blistering heat and myriad insects or drenching rain
Jul 6 2011 2:00PM
0 0
profile picture
Brock.
Posts: 5698 - Karma: 1,332
Job: Dishwasher/Kitchen assistant

Reality: I wash dishes and assist with the kitchen business.
Jul 6 2011 2:11PM
0 0
profile picture
987321654hgfd
Posts: 5133 - Karma: 5,447
Title: Infantry

Reality: Pick up trash and sweep and mop shit all day
Jul 6 2011 3:28PM
0 0
profile picture
yuck
Posts: 8384 - Karma: 2,090
Job : Camp Counsellor

Reality : Child Riot Control and Human Paint Canvas
Jul 6 2011 3:30PM
0 0
profile picture
Drail
Posts: 14012 - Karma: 10,010
Job title: treeplanter (or Silvicultural Engineer depending on who's asking)

reality: I plant trees.
Jul 6 2011 3:32PM
0 0
profile picture
2_fadez
Posts: 7780 - Karma: 4,183
Job Title: Junior Counselor
Jul 6 2011 3:55PM
0 0
profile picture
Blake.P
Posts: 9894 - Karma: 3,585
Employer: West Seattle Thriftway. Job title: courtesy clerk. Reality: I put food into bags then clean shit
Jul 6 2011 4:01PM
0 0
profile picture
Laurent.
Posts: 10056 - Karma: 25,313
The only job I ever had:

Title: Head of Communications sector and Public Relations sector for the Red Cross Amsterdam.

Reality: I sat behind two 27-inch Mac screens connected to a Mac Pro doing pretty much nothing.
Jul 6 2011 4:05PM
0 0
profile picture
snowking249
Posts: 1452 - Karma: 34
Job Title: Purchasing Assistant

Reality: Input info into the computer 1/4 of the day and try not to fall asleep the other 3/4.
Jul 6 2011 4:22PM
0 0
profile picture
ILLinoisance
Posts: 3527 - Karma: 5,398
Job title: Cart Attendant

Reality: Go on laptop in basement. Oh, and drive, gas, and wash golf carts like a madman.
Jul 6 2011 4:52PM
0 0
profile picture
yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
Employer: Shakespeare Festival
Title: Staff
Reality: Scape Goat for the stupid and/or drunk people. If a stupid person walks across the stage (outdoor theater) it is my fault
Jul 6 2011 4:57PM
0 0
profile picture
kootenayklaus
Posts: 3914 - Karma: 2,179
Job: Henry's Cameras Sales Associate.

Reality: I help people choose between a T2i and 7D. On multiple occasions almost every day.
Jul 6 2011 4:58PM
0 0
profile picture
samwise
Posts: 2592 - Karma: 36
Employer: East Beach Association

Title: Crew Leader

Reality: Drive around on the beach in a fresh ass truck all day bumping tunes. Make sure the crew cleans up trash on beach, talks to girls in bikinis, puts up fences/signs, buries dead animals, then we surf afterward. I love my job.
Jul 6 2011 6:19PM
0 0
profile picture
beezey
Posts: 9027 - Karma: 427

Employer: Tamarack Canopy Zipline Tour

Title: Veteran Guide/ Office Manager

Reality: Lifting up fat people/entertaining/grabbing lots of crotches

Yelling at other people who try to work in my office and then telling everyone what to do.

Jul 6 2011 6:21PM
0 0
profile picture
ohmythugaim
Posts: 1376 - Karma: 130
I work at McDonalds.

I cum in your Big Macs.

I don't give a fuck.
Jul 6 2011 6:24PM
0 0
profile picture
dat_ski_dude
Posts: 554 - Karma: 15

Employer: GE Aviation

Title: Metallurgist for Aeronatical Coatings Lab

Reality: i look in a microscope for 8hrs a day

Jul 6 2011 6:29PM
0 0
profile picture
TOAST.
Posts: 7482 - Karma: 36,057
Summer
Employer: Roundtop Mountain Resort
Trek Guide
If people are there- take them through a bunch of ziplines n' shit
If people arnt there- do maintenance/nothing until people get there
Winter
Employer: See above
Park Crew
Ski 60% of the time rake shit 35% watch edits 5%
Jul 6 2011 6:45PM
0 0
profile picture
PagesHouse
Posts: 6024 - Karma: 104
Job Title: Unofficial paralegal

Reality: Doing the things no one else in the law office wants to do
Jul 6 2011 6:49PM
0 0
profile picture
dmc12380
Posts: 3545 - Karma: 792
Haha, i dont no where you work at, but i used to work at Hannafords in rutland (produce) and the people who did that job were the ones with down syndrome
Jul 6 2011 6:52PM
0 0
profile picture
Jakx~
Posts: 653 - Karma: 503

Title: Belayer/Flowrider instructor

Reality: Either hold a rope while little kids struggle up an easy thirty foot rock wall and almost piss their pants. Get mad tips from rich parents by brown nosing the crap out of them. Clean a little... Then the Flowrider part: hand board to rider, watch them. Not much to complain about cause All my managers are super laid back, hot girls, and Free smoothies. And I get to ride the Flowrider for free when I'm off

Click for larger image

Jul 6 2011 6:56PM
0 0
profile picture
Keenan_Jones
Posts: 436 - Karma: 175
Title: Tour Manager/Marketing

Reality: Young Adult Babysitter
Jul 6 2011 6:59PM
0 0
profile picture
jibmeisterflex
Posts: 719 - Karma: 63
Title: Soccer reff. I baby sit 7 year old kids that very often punch me in the balls and I dont know why
Jul 6 2011 7:02PM
0 0
profile picture
OGHolliday
Posts: 2390 - Karma: 2,430
#1.Employer: Summer at Steiner

Position: Counselor

Reality: Play knockout and draw pictures.

#2. Employer: Route 7 Bar and Grill

Position: Runner

Reality: Carry wobbly ass tray's with a lot of food and get bitched at by New Yorkers

#3.Employer: Rich old folks.

Position: Landscaper

Reality: Pick weeds, carry rocks, and get really shitty poison ivy. FUUUUUUUUUUUu

Jul 6 2011 8:22PM
0 0
profile picture
gregorio
Posts: 2372 - Karma: 151
Job Title: Seasonal sales associate in the Outside Lawn and Garden department of Lowe's

Reality: I rearrange everything from plants to 80 pound bags of cement and when people ask me questions I go find a full time worker to answer the question.
Jul 6 2011 8:31PM
0 0
profile picture
introvert
Posts: 4718 - Karma: 1,482
Job title: Cook

Reality: I cook.
Jul 6 2011 8:38PM
0 0
profile picture
Liam.Butler
Posts: 709 - Karma: 17
How do you like it, in school that subject was really interesting.

Employer: RV Metalware
Title: Metal Fabrication/welder
Reality: I lift heavy metal all day because we have no fucking crane and turn it into a product.
Jul 6 2011 8:47PM
0 0
profile picture
oreopancake.
Posts: 2596 - Karma: 21
Title: Oven Cook
Reality: I only know how to make salads, i suck at my job.
Jul 6 2011 8:49PM
0 0
profile picture
snwbrdmilf
Posts: 22441 - Karma: 2,805
Title: Customer Care Professional
Reality: I educate people over the phone about their health insurance.
Jul 6 2011 8:53PM
0 0
profile picture
-JME-
Posts: 679 - Karma: 33
title- designer /shop guy

too much time at a computer
Jul 6 2011 8:56PM
0 0
profile picture
TheClap.
Posts: 21664 - Karma: 4,140
i lost
Jul 6 2011 8:56PM
0 0
profile picture
skithesprings
Posts: 9086 - Karma: 1,349
employer: multi metals & jeanette steel

job title: boom truck assistant

reality: sleep in the passenger seat while we're driving all over, hook up and unhook I-beams from the crane which involves walking around on really tall things with absolutely no safety equipment, and ride the crane strap to get to where i need to be which is fun because i can be 140 feet off the ground sitting on a strap, once again with no safety equipment.

another perk of my job is that when deliveries are slow i get to work in a steel shop learning how to weld, cut, bend, and do all the fun shit to make sick fucking jibs. too bad steel is expensive. this is the light stock yard with all the 40 foot pieces of perfect jib making tubing. its like a big tease.

Click for larger image
Jul 6 2011 8:59PM
0 0
profile picture
reverendwrong
Posts: 3145 - Karma: 142
Title: Kitchen Expedition

Reality: Take food from mexicans, put it on plates, add sides, check for order accuracy, put on tray, yell for server, yell for server again, yell for sever using expletive, repeat.
Jul 6 2011 9:08PM
0 0
profile picture
Liam.Butler
Posts: 709 - Karma: 17
Please quit your job, if what you're saying is the truth you will be killed one day. No reason to risk your self like that.
Jul 6 2011 9:11PM
0 0
profile picture
TheClap.
Posts: 21664 - Karma: 4,140
title: hospital management
reality: I run hospital

scary thought isn't it
Jul 6 2011 9:11PM
0 0
profile picture
theJones
Posts: 676 - Karma: 158
employer: fairmont chateau lake louise

job title: boathouse attendant

actually: help people into canoes, give them lifejackets
Jul 6 2011 9:14PM
0 0
profile picture
AOTEAROA
Posts: 2216 - Karma: 15
Paid to go on NS. Booyahhhhh
Jul 6 2011 9:16PM
0 0
profile picture
Campeador
Posts: 7516 - Karma: -1,227
Not employed now but the best

Burger King

Title: Server

Reality: Hung out mostly in the freezer drinking all the orange juice. Threw ice in the fryer. Pretended to be the manager and yelled at my friends who also worked there in front of shocked customers. Occasionally served 3-5 hour old burgers to people at the drive-thru window.
Jul 6 2011 9:22PM
0 0
profile picture
brandon_
Posts: 807 - Karma: 15
Employer: Canadian Forces

Job Title: Infantrymen

Reality: I sit in a room for weeks on end, and tell greasy stories, and jerk off, then I do my job for 2 weeks. Repeat as necessary
Jul 6 2011 9:24PM
0 0
profile picture
skithesprings
Posts: 9086 - Karma: 1,349
but what you don't realize is that in ironworking what i do is fairly standard stuff. walking across a beam thats 10 feet up or 200 feet up is really not all that unsafe, and safety equipment rarely is "necessary".

plus for a summer job, you can't beat the pay.
Jul 6 2011 9:41PM
0 0
profile picture
Daph
Posts: 5978 - Karma: 5,009
1. Title: sales associate
Reality: organize clothing and clean saddles

2. Title: Groom
Reality: Clean and ride horses but don't get to do any of the fun shit

3. Title: Kennel Technician
Reality: Poop scooper and dog entertainer
Jul 6 2011 9:47PM
0 0
profile picture
Relish_man
Posts: 5386 - Karma: 551
/NS
Jul 6 2011 9:51PM
0 0
profile picture
dompuch
Posts: 1449 - Karma: 1,186
title:lumber yard forklifter
reality: stab lumber,bang up trucks,make little to no money
Jul 6 2011 9:52PM
0 0
profile picture
dat_ski_dude
Posts: 554 - Karma: 15

having to deal with some of the specs and engineers can suck, but its a great job 

Jul 6 2011 9:55PM
0 0
profile picture
Midge.
Posts: 381 - Karma: 12
Title- Salad/Line cook
Reality- I cook salads for 8 hours, and then wash the dishes that stupid people are too slow to do.
Jul 6 2011 10:07PM
0 0
profile picture
snwbrdmilf
Posts: 22441 - Karma: 2,805
That sounds like a really bad salad...
Jul 6 2011 10:20PM
0 0
profile picture
Midge.
Posts: 381 - Karma: 12
Click for larger image

Yummmy
Jul 6 2011 10:27PM
0 0
profile picture
pomme-de-terre
Posts: 3915 - Karma: 703
job title: seasonal sales associate for inside lawn and garden at lowes home improvement center

reality: one of my managers tells me to rearrange a sector of our department, so i do, then my other manager tells me to put it back, so i do. also i help customers.
Jul 6 2011 10:31PM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-5)