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Death is upon us, May 21, 2011

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flaming_bases
Posts: 114 - Karma: 11
http://www.ebiblefellowship.com/outreach/tracts/may21/



I was at my church group today, and our priest (usually really happy, good guy) was so scared and quiet. He showed us this, and we're all pretty scared right now. Im not sure what to think anymore.

Lets keep the bible bashing to a low, i want to show my church community some serious input. My priest said we only have so many hours to reconcile, and i agree
May 17 2011 9:28PM
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240sxKid
Posts: 733 - Karma: 3
Ill be at the U2 concert in Invesco Field.
May 17 2011 10:50PM
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Dwarftosser1
Posts: 2602 - Karma: 951
I wanted to go :(
May 17 2011 10:50PM
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ryano
Posts: 4465 - Karma: 1,535
if i didnt move out of denver, I would've worked that show doing audio and lighting for it. along with the system of a down show thats going through there..
May 17 2011 10:51PM
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Montville57
Posts: 1364 - Karma: 18
THIS THREAD IS NOW ABOUT U2
May 17 2011 10:52PM
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steezy.stew
Posts: 1137 - Karma: 568
What makes hardcore christians believe the universe was created some 11,000 years ago? I mean for any person living in the modern era that should instantly set off some sort of alarm in their head.
May 17 2011 10:52PM
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Slowbro
Posts: 3932 - Karma: 22,076
I've finally come to respect Kangbang somewhat. Also, the whole thing is a load of shit
May 17 2011 10:53PM
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pomme-de-terre
Posts: 3915 - Karma: 703
listen pussy, if you are gonna do this do it right, send your videogames, ski gear and money to me if you really want to be saved. your priest or whatever is lying to you. im the only one who can help.
May 17 2011 10:53PM
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JaayLaay
Posts: 939 - Karma: 89
Haha im christian (Before i get bashed, i don't shove my religion down peoples throats and i respect others views) But i am fairly sure that the bible says that men will not know the date when Christ returns. Then again, im not 100 percent sure. 
May 17 2011 10:53PM
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Kangbang
Posts: 14211 - Karma: 423
No, not wrong at all. If you believe "God" created the world, then how can you believe in evolution?
May 17 2011 10:55PM
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TechnoPotamus
Posts: 11626 - Karma: 3,522
the creator of religion is the level of trolling i aspire to one day reach.
May 17 2011 11:00PM
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Bukkakeskitrip
Posts: 5677 - Karma: 95
believing that god created the world =/= following religion/being religious
May 17 2011 11:00PM
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Kangbang
Posts: 14211 - Karma: 423
I'm talking about evolution.
May 17 2011 11:03PM
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derpina
Posts: 2186 - Karma: 55
Hmmm... So, you'd think being a priest and all that he probably would have known about this umpteen years ago... and probably would have informed everyone about it umpteen years ago... and probably would have had enough time to let it sink in that he would be emotionally prepared.


Kind of sounds like he's acting like he just found out from the rest of the hubabaloo about this recently.



#justsayin.



I believe in God, but I don't believe in this.
May 17 2011 11:06PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51829 - Karma: 164,600
I agree. At church school thursday night they were talking about this. We've been praying every day for the peoples salvation.
May 17 2011 11:07PM
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Montville57
Posts: 1364 - Karma: 18
Soooooooo should I jerk off or not... I'm still confused
May 17 2011 11:08PM
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flaming_bases
Posts: 114 - Karma: 11
you are actinglike a child, im 14 and more mature than you, grow up
May 17 2011 11:14PM
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shocker611
Posts: 2599 - Karma: 423
so drinking to excess is also a sin, so i guess he hates me and about 90% of the population as well. people try to play on that because its something to talk shit on christianity about. GOD DOES NOT HATE ANYONE. Why would he send his son to die for our sins if he hated us? Homosexuals are forgiven just like my drunk ass is forgiven
May 17 2011 11:16PM
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jorb.co
Posts: 2581 - Karma: 468

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

ahahahahahahahahahahahahah

christianity

May 17 2011 11:17PM
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twsnow22
Posts: 1285 - Karma: 488
your name is the abortinator..and your icon is a hanger..and then this statement..bhahah this tread is dope.
May 17 2011 11:19PM
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shocker611
Posts: 2599 - Karma: 423
hahahahahahahhahahahhahaha ignorance
May 17 2011 11:19PM
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PartyHon
Posts: 2019 - Karma: 425
i am a christian... but what are you going to do if nothing happens?

i mean this could be another y2k
May 17 2011 11:20PM
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BMB
Posts: 3138 - Karma: 232
your 14! And you believe in this ridiculousness. Your still young and ignorant so I'll let that pass, but next time(after Saturday) searchbar, and don't listen to your priests so literally.
May 17 2011 11:21PM
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flaming_bases
Posts: 114 - Karma: 11
change your ways, i hope to see you in heaven on the 21st


:D
May 17 2011 11:22PM
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Montville57
Posts: 1364 - Karma: 18
Is that how you are going to create your legacy on Newschoolers, by acting like a douche bag, I'm 15 so I'm aloud to act immature so blow it out your asshole faggot. SEE YOU ASSHOLES IN A WEEK
May 17 2011 11:23PM
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flaming_bases
Posts: 114 - Karma: 11
aloud? dont yell no need. and dont slander homosexuals, they will be dealt with at the pearly gates.
May 17 2011 11:24PM
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Montville57
Posts: 1364 - Karma: 18
I'm gunna shove a chainsaw up your ass and fist fuck your sisters cousin. Leave mow
May 17 2011 11:26PM
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flaming_bases
Posts: 114 - Karma: 11
Click for larger image
May 17 2011 11:28PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51829 - Karma: 164,600
Well we all got together and prayed for months before y2k. You can thank the christians around you.

I encourage everyone to examine their hearts. Jesus is coming soon.
May 17 2011 11:29PM
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malonius_funk
Posts: 2249 - Karma: 1,500
GOD FORGIVE ME I HAVE MASTER BATED PROFUSELY IN MY LIFETIME PLEASE DO NOT LAY YOUR DEATH HANDS UPON ME.
May 17 2011 11:30PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51829 - Karma: 164,600
It's you're by the way. Maybe if you could learn basic english the bible would make more sense to you
May 17 2011 11:32PM
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JimboSlice.
Posts: 53 - Karma: 10
Don't worry about it dude. They won't understand.
May 17 2011 11:34PM
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PartyHon
Posts: 2019 - Karma: 425
nice totally irrelevant comeback hahahaha
May 17 2011 11:39PM
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jayo.
Posts: 5015 - Karma: 34
Your fear mongering priest can kindly suck my balls.
May 17 2011 11:42PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51829 - Karma: 164,600
Well he's calling somebody young and ignorant when he can't even speak english properly.

You're probably one of those people who's okay with mexican being the new national language aren't you?
May 17 2011 11:46PM
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ILLinoisance
Posts: 3527 - Karma: 5,398
Mexican? Really?
May 17 2011 11:48PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51829 - Karma: 164,600
America was founded as a Christian, english speaking nation. How far are we going to go before we turn back to God?
May 17 2011 11:50PM
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Obi-Wan-Jenobi
Posts: 951 - Karma: 119
I am a christian and this is a lie. The bible itself says so. Mathew 24:36 “But as for that day and hour no one knows it – not even the angels in heaven – except the Father alone. SO if anyone claims to know to when CHrist will return they are wrongster.
May 17 2011 11:51PM
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ILLinoisance
Posts: 3527 - Karma: 5,398
Shit, who knows, we might even go as far to make Mexican a separate language....
May 17 2011 11:52PM
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Bukkakeskitrip
Posts: 5677 - Karma: 95
i know...
May 17 2011 11:53PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51829 - Karma: 164,600
What are you even talking about?
May 17 2011 11:54PM
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flaming_bases
Posts: 114 - Karma: 11
i bless everyone posted in here with this

Click for larger image

i hope the best for you, but the high father will make the judgement
May 17 2011 11:54PM
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SlimDunkin.
Posts: 2065 - Karma: 361
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May 17 2011 11:55PM
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ILLinoisance
Posts: 3527 - Karma: 5,398
Spanish is a language. Mexican is not.
May 17 2011 11:56PM
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AwR
Posts: 5147 - Karma: 1,881
I will greet that motherfucker with a high five
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I think everyone knows the words sing along NS'ers...oh and if someone could autoplay this into every thread about rapture that would be plus karma!

If I die before I wake
at least in heaven I can skate
'cause right now on earth I can't do jack
without the man up on my back

now heaven would be a DJ
spinning dub all night long
and heaven would just kicking back
with Jesus packing my bong
and if you don't believe in Jesus and Muhammad or Buddha too
and while the world is warring
just sit back and laugh at you singing..

If I die before I wake
at least in heaven I can skate
'cause right now on earth I can't do jack
without the man up on my back

now most people think of heaven
they see those pearly gates
but I looked a little closer
and there's a sign says "do not skate"
so if you wanna come to my heaven
well we're all gonna have a ball
and everyone u know is welcome
'cause we got no gates or walls singing.

If I die before I wake
at least in heaven I can skate
'cause right now on earth I can't do shit
without the man fucking with it

and then I got to the gate
pulled a list that I'd been calling fate
I'm sorry friend you can't come in
you gotta a list here that doesn't end
you're mad 'cause I smoke dope
you teaching any classes in how to cope
I'll find a place to rest my head
I rather be alone now that I'm dead
like Christian hossoi way back in 87
we'll be busting Christ air's until we get to heaven
think I really care that I miss my biology
got my education in stale fishology
with all your rules you got to chill
I'm gonna twist out Mike McGill
I'm gonna twist out 'cause I got the skills
I'm gonna twist out 'cause I got the skills... got the skills got the skills

heaven is a halfpipe..
heaven is a halfpipe..

If I die before I wake
at least in heaven I can skate
'cause right now on earth I can't do jack
without the man up on my back

If I die before I wake
at least in heaven I can skate
'cause right now on earth I can't do shit
without the man fucking with it
May 17 2011 11:57PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51829 - Karma: 164,600
It's the same thing. That's all you have for your best point to tell me I'm wrong? Mexican isn't a language? I bet you were on your debate team in highschool
May 17 2011 11:58PM
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Xanadoo
Posts: 729 - Karma: 1,237
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May 17 2011 11:59PM
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SlimDunkin.
Posts: 2065 - Karma: 361
Honestly, Im confident that, May 21st, is not the second coming of Christ. I mean there have been multiple dates before this and all have been, false, as humans were not supposed to know "when the world ends". I'm going to live my life as I normally would, and if perhaps I'm going to have to fend off a bunch of Undead Christians with a sharpened stick so be it, I believe in god, but I think this is bullshit.
May 18 2011 12:00AM
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95959
Posts: 2765 - Karma: 377
This reminded me, I saw a car with a number sticker that read, "in case of rapture, the car is yours." Stoked
May 18 2011 12:00AM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51829 - Karma: 164,600
Can we leave the memes out of a serious thread for once? Please?
May 18 2011 12:01AM
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Xanadoo
Posts: 729 - Karma: 1,237
sorry for double post but i also just thought id add that you can have more than one national language. so even if it was decided that spanish should be the national language they wouldnt just get rid of english. that wouldnt make sense
May 18 2011 12:01AM
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