Replying to Life rant

I realize all I am gonna get is "cool story bro" pics and "u mad" memes but I don't give a fuck.



Just this weekend I found out that the lady that used to run the daycare I was a part of had her third stroke and is in the hospital and isn't really responding to any sort of stimuli. Now, this lady had become an extremely close family friend, so close that she is essentially family. While thinking about this last night studying for finals I realized I have had around 10 family members/super close family friends die since I was born (I am 22)..


-When I was 2 my dad's father died. I don't remember him at all but apparently he loved the hell out of me and when he came from Minnesota to visit (I live in Washington) he almost wouldn't let my own mom and dad hold me.

-When I was 8 the family dog, my constant companion and only real friend at the time was put to sleep.

-When I was 11 my aunt passed away from emphysema.

-When I was 12 the husband of a close family friend (who basically became like another grandfather/grandmother for me) died.

-When I was 14 my grandfather on my mom's side died unexpectedly. He was admitted to the hospital feeling light headed and was dead 24 hours later. Yay Japanese medical system.

-When I was 16 my cousin's husband died. He was one of two people that taught me how to shoot a rifle.

-When I was 16 later in the year my grandmother on my dad's side died.

-When I was 18 this lady that ran my daycare had her 2nd stroke and slowed WAY down (like, almost to nursing home I need constant help stage).

-Around this time was when my dad found me shortly after graduation sitting in the shop with his shotgun in my mouth loaded and I was about ready to pull the trigger.

-Off to college I go and met my now ex gf who kinda helped me realize that there was more for me to live for.

-Then, last year when I was 21 the close friend of my mom who considered me as the grandchild she didn't have was admitted to the hospital with a nasty cough and was dead 8 hours later.

-Later that year, another lady that had considered me a grandson died after hitting the age of 98.


And now I have this latest issue that my dad feels this lady won't survive. I honestly feel like shit and am worried my brain/emotional status is about to crack again.