t's time again for the annual "Stella Awards!" For those unfamiliar with
these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled
hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald's in New Mexico
where she purchased the coffee. You remember, she took the lid off the
coffee and put it between her knees while she was driving. Who would ever
think one could get burned doing that, right?
That's right, these are awards for the most outlandish lawsuits and
verdicts in the U.S. You know, the kinds of cases that make you scratch
your head. So keep your head scratcher handy. Here are the Stella's for the
past year:
7TH PLACE:
Kathleen Robertson of Austin , Texas , was awarded $80,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running
inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son.
6TH PLACE:
Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles , California - you knew California had to be in the list somewhere, right? - who won $74,000 plus medical expenses
when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying
to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.
[Go ahead, grab your head scratcher].
5TH PLACE:
Terrence Dickson, of Bristol , Pennsylvania , who was leaving a house he had just burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the
automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to open. Worse, he couldn't re-enter the house because the door
connecting the garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut. Forced to subsist for eight - count 'em, EIGHT! - days on a case of Pepsi
and a large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner's insurance company claiming undue mental Anguish.
Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson $500,000 for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish.
[Keep scratching. There are more...]
4TH PLACE:
Jerry Williams, of Little Rock, Arkansas, garnered 4th Place in the Stella's when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being
bitten on the butt by his next door neighbor's beagle - even though the beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. Williams did not get as
much as he asked for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the
fence into the yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun.
[Grrrrr . Scratch, scratch.]
3RD PLACE:
Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, because a jury ordered a Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500 after she slipped on a spilled
soft drink and broke her tailbone (coccyx). The reason the soft drink was on the floor: Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier
during an argument. What ever happened to people being responsible for their own actions?
[Scratch, scratch, scratch. Hang in there; there are only two more Stellas to go...]
2ND PLACE:
Kara Walton, of Claymont , Delaware , sued the owner of a night club in a nearby city because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor,
knocking out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover
charge, the jury said the night club had to pay her $12,000....oh, yeah, plus dental expenses. Go figure.
1ST PLACE:
[May I have a fanfare played on 50 kazoos please]
This year's runaway First Place Stella Award winner was Mrs. Merv Grazinski, of Oklahoma City , Oklahoma , who purchased a new 32-foot
Winnebago motor home. On her first trip home - from an OU football game, no less(no giggling you longhorn fans)- having driven on to the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70
mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go to the back of the Winnebago to make herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the motor home left the
freeway, crashed and overturned. Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not putting in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually
leave the driver's seat while the cruise control was set. The Oklahoma jury awarded her - you are sitting down, right? - $1,750,000 PLUS a new
motor home. Winnebago actually changed their manuals as a result of this suit, just incase Mrs. Grazinski has any relatives who might also buy a
motor home.
Talk about frivolous laswuits!! damn!
BTW, the pic has nothing to do with the story, i just thought it was funny!
(This is copy pasta btw)
