In all honesty, I would have to say that you had a bad experience with crossfit at a below par shitty gym. I've been to roughly 5 crossfit's over the past few years and the last one I currently did a trial at, I didn't like it at all. It was very different from the other gyms I had been to. The only reason I was at the new place was because it was cheaper than the other crossfit in my new college town.
That leads me to a point you brought up about CrossFit being greedy. The real crossfit here aims to reduce immaturity with college aged kids so they charge a higher rate to deter those types of members. The new one, that sucked, is just starting out, but I honestly couldn't handle their programming and many of their uncertified interns. To start, I agree with you that they are a pretty greedy organization, but it is business after all and the main point in running a company is to be profitable. They aren't losing business, it's obvious crossfit has been soaring in popularity across the world. Affiliate fees are expensive, that is a reason why many gyms have to charge higher rates. But once again, these smaller gyms are also trying to bring in revenue.
$1000 to get certified as a trainer may seem like a lot, but compared to schooling and other tests to be certified as strength and conditioning trainers it is not that far out there. Most gyms pay their coaches right around $20 for every class time they teach, do the math and it's 50 classes. Which isn't bad because many coaches are passionate about crossfit and are at the gym regardless.
On another note, I would easily put my money on Techno if you two were to compete. I could beat you, because I wouldn't let you beat me.