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jokes

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d_structure_power
Posts: 92 - Karma: 10
anyone know funny skiing jokes?? pretty gay but its for a skool project
May 16 2004 7:33PM
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alev
Posts: 7819 - Karma: 410
im sure your teacher will love this:
a guy once told me that getting blown by a guy was like straight skis: it feels really good, but then you look down, ad its not as good anymore
i didnt make that up so if someone reads it who made it, thanx, and props to them
...RUN FOR COVER PRODUCTIONS...
May 16 2004 8:05PM
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ESB
Posts: 9274 - Karma: 10,648
No, the joke goes, 'Riding straight skis is like getting head from a gay guy. It feels good until you look down.'

This one's from SBC Skier I think: How many freeskiers does it take to build a backcountry booter? Answer: 10. Four to build it, six to say, 'Make it bigger!'

How many snowboarders does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 20. One to do it, 19 to say 'I can do that.'

Q: How many NS.com members does it take to answer a simple question?
A: 10. One to answer, three to say 'How fucking stupid are you?', three to say 'This has already been asked a thousand times', and three to say 'Who the fuck cares anyway?'
May 16 2004 10:46PM
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drewishish
Posts: 3710 - Karma: 23
^ ya i've heard that one like a billion times
'weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee go nads' the squirle
May 16 2004 10:48PM
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newschool_huck69
Posts: 1759 - Karma: 10
Thats an odd school project.
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May 17 2004 12:54AM
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ECfreeski3
Posts: 12019 - Karma: 126
^thats wat i was thinking
anyway there's always the 'whats th ehdest thing about (snoblading, snowboarding etc w/e)....?'
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'Big Willy, are you serious? You must have four to six vaginas to create the estrogen to fuel a ignorant response like that.' - west
'buddy. honestly. longer skis. ill buy you some extentions for easter.' -Mommy, to stevexs2

May 17 2004 3:09PM
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ECfreeski3
Posts: 12019 - Karma: 126
*wats the hardest thing about...* i meant
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'Big Willy, are you serious? You must have four to six vaginas to create the estrogen to fuel a ignorant response like that.' - west
'buddy. honestly. longer skis. ill buy you some extentions for easter.' -Mommy, to stevexs2

May 17 2004 3:10PM
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Rip
Posts: 1158 - Karma: 3
This one is a little more school friendly...

where do 1 legged people work?? At IHOP


Yankees Suck
May 17 2004 5:03PM
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pat-rickdaigle
Posts: 8556 - Karma: 1,020
what's a pirates favorite ski?

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRMADA.




http://lptproductions.tripod.com/
May 17 2004 5:11PM
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ECfreeski3
Posts: 12019 - Karma: 126
hahahahahahahahahaha
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'Big Willy, are you serious? You must have four to six vaginas to create the estrogen to fuel a ignorant response like that.' - west
'buddy. honestly. longer skis. ill buy you some extentions for easter.' -Mommy, to stevexs2

May 17 2004 6:22PM
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nut
Posts: 625 - Karma: 12
i think i've said this one before, but its the only ski-related joke i know...
Q. What do u call two gay guys on shaped skis




A. parabolickers (said like: pair o' ball lickers)


Cats. the other white meat.
May 17 2004 7:04PM
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AttitashSkier
Posts: 2494 - Karma: 10
how many telemarkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?... none, they're all hippies without electicity
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line skis- because skiing needs a future
May 17 2004 7:50PM
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AttitashSkier
Posts: 2494 - Karma: 10
its a quote from someone, i forget who
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line skis- because skiing needs a future
May 17 2004 7:57PM
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homestead
Posts: 2493 - Karma: 11
there is one about cross country skiers and the three are sleeping. the two guys on the outside wake up and all jizzed their pants. the guy in the middle said he had a dream that he was cross country skiing


In the words of AC/DC: We roll tonight... to the guitar bite... and for those about to rock... I salute you.
May 18 2004 6:19PM
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AttitashSkier
Posts: 2494 - Karma: 10
hahaha
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line skis- because skiing needs a future
May 18 2004 6:25PM
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the_lone_cannoneer
Posts: 252 - Karma: 32
i jizzed myself when i heard that one homestead
i've been steezed out since cub scouts
May 18 2004 6:28PM
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hoodratz47
Posts: 12020 - Karma: 9,475
greg tufflemayer.. (yeah i botched it.)





;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
You only ski for fun because you suck balls.. thanks hoodrat!
May 18 2004 6:32PM
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m1garand
Posts: 3343 - Karma: 15
how many snowboarders does it take to screw in a light bulb?
12: 1 to actually do it, and 11 to say 'I could do that'

*
May 18 2004 9:57PM
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B-Har406
Posts: 2484 - Karma: 6
ha ha^




Thongs are so hot right now
May 18 2004 10:15PM
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drewishish
Posts: 3710 - Karma: 23
ya thats probly true with alot of snowboarderrs but not all of them ^^
'weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee go nads' the squirle
May 18 2004 10:19PM
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Mike-O
Posts: 14593 - Karma: 1,089
homestead it goes like this:

Three cross-country skiers flew to the venue of the contest. The hotel was packed so they had to get a room together and share the same kingsize bed. Next morning one of them wakes up and says: 'Oh man, I had the sexiest dream ever..I got head from a really foxy chick..' 'Hey me too!' says the other one. Then the third one in the middle wakes up and says: 'Man...what bad dream. I was in a cross-country skiing contest and almost won the whole thing but just obefore the finish line my poles melted!'
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Hummingbird style: 70 times in one second.

Does Crichton smoke? Does a bear shit in the woods? -Rex
May 19 2004 12:15AM
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Dieter1080
Posts: 244 - Karma: 66
what's the difference between a snowboarder and a vacuum cleaner?

the way they attach the dirtbag
May 19 2004 1:55AM
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m1garand
Posts: 3343 - Karma: 15
^^ i dont get it.

*
May 21 2004 2:05PM
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ReggaeConcept1
Posts: 2987 - Karma: -22
here are anti-snowboarder jokes (im not anti-snowboarder myself though):

What do you call a snowboarder after he was dumped by his girlfriend?
-Homeless

What is the difference between a snowboarder and a vacuum?
-Where you attach the dirtbag

What's the difference between a beginning snowboarder and his teacher?
-About 3 hours

What did the snowboarder get on the SATs?
-Drool

Three snowboarders walk into a bar, but there is only one stool left. What do they do?
-Turn it upside down.


Three snowboarders are sitting in a hot tub. A condom floats to the top. One snowboarder says to the other two, 'Okay, who farted?'


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-Brad, Representing the KPP
May 21 2004 3:44PM
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Ahmets_Brother
Posts: 20283 - Karma: 5,931
that was funny^

dont go to new york. all it has to offer is i love ny stickers
May 21 2004 5:35PM
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Luga
Posts: 1571 - Karma: 20
all those jokes were lame
Luga....P.Crew
May 21 2004 5:40PM
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drewishish
Posts: 3710 - Karma: 23
i liked the last one it was funny
'weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee go nads' the squirle
May 21 2004 6:03PM
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ReggaeConcept1
Posts: 2987 - Karma: -22
i never said they were good, but he asked for jokes. I know they arent skiing jokes, but they are anti-snowboarder jokes, a mentality which is a part of every skier, no matter how many of his friends are snowboarders


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-Brad, Representing the KPP
May 21 2004 6:16PM
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drewishish
Posts: 3710 - Karma: 23
^ this is true

'weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee go nads' the squirle
May 21 2004 6:22PM
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canonrider
Posts: 2635 - Karma: 29
PARABOLICKERS BAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!
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B
May 22 2004 12:22PM
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