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October, 2024

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Girlfriend Application

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ECB
Posts: 6991 - Karma: 622
My roommates and I decided that right now we are gay. 4 guys sitting around watching tv every night. So we need some help making applications we will hand out to a few hundred girls.

What should the application be?

So far we have:

Check which position you are ok with
Vaginal
Anal
Oral
Earlobe
Other ______________________

And, attach a nude picture with the application.





What else should we include?


And we are thinking about pursing getting girlfriends from the library, not the bar.
Sep 17 2010 12:29AM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,273
get rid of the 'other' option, you don't want to let her think she has too much say in the relationship
Sep 17 2010 12:31AM
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Ducky.
Posts: 5811 - Karma: 1,420
First
Sep 17 2010 12:31AM
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Negro_Jesus
Posts: 1789 - Karma: 91
blumpkin
Sep 17 2010 12:31AM
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Ducky.
Posts: 5811 - Karma: 1,420
shit
Sep 17 2010 12:32AM
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spruitm
Posts: 2221 - Karma: 1,069
ask her FULL TILTS
Sep 17 2010 12:32AM
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black
Posts: 208 - Karma: 250
chocolate o-ring

when a girl sits in the deposit bin of a porta-potty and gives you a rim job while you take a shit

ask them about that
Sep 17 2010 12:33AM
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vailsux.com
Posts: 1769 - Karma: 440
you gotta put in a cooking option.

you have to go for the full meal deal.
Sep 17 2010 12:33AM
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MACAQUE
Posts: 2811 - Karma: 696
Favorite food to make.
Sep 17 2010 12:33AM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,273
awww...dude
Sep 17 2010 12:34AM
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black
Posts: 208 - Karma: 250
lol its blumpkin 2.0
Sep 17 2010 12:36AM
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Petey.
Posts: 5736 - Karma: 4,885
First page!
Sep 17 2010 12:36AM
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ECB
Posts: 6991 - Karma: 622
I doubt you have ever gotten a real blumpkin. Let's just say that I enjoy shitting, and sex, and sexual related acts, but after getting a blumpkin one night, never again. Ever.
Sep 17 2010 12:37AM
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low_fidelity
Posts: 2673 - Karma: 118
WOW LINKAGE
Sep 17 2010 12:37AM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,273
HOLY FUCK
Sep 17 2010 12:38AM
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black
Posts: 208 - Karma: 250
you caught me, but I have received chocolate o-ring, then I closed the lid and left her to die
Sep 17 2010 12:38AM
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Petey.
Posts: 5736 - Karma: 4,885
Dude this is NS, you can't just say that shit without details. What the hell
Sep 17 2010 12:38AM
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I.B
Posts: 8137 - Karma: 24,353
^This. Also instead of other put..."Sandwhich choices from which i have" and "time it takes you to make it from bedroom to kitchen make me a sandwhich then back to the bedroom"

If its under 30s you have a keeper.
Sep 17 2010 12:39AM
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ECB
Posts: 6991 - Karma: 622
I only post up to 7 times a day, because i'm not funny anymore according to ashley, but maybe tomorrow ill tell the story
Sep 17 2010 12:39AM
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powderkeg
Posts: 29 - Karma: 10
a must have:

Are you related to me? (please enclose birth certificate)
Sep 17 2010 12:39AM
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2_fadez
Posts: 7780 - Karma: 4,183
Ability to follow directions on a 1-10 scale
Willing to do 3-somes
If they were to rate how hot their friends were on a scale of 1-10 (in case you need a backup plan)
If they are able to do laundry
Yearly combined income of their parents
Sep 17 2010 12:39AM
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skithesprings
Posts: 9086 - Karma: 1,349
this is going to fail hard... real hard.
Sep 17 2010 12:40AM
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ECB
Posts: 6991 - Karma: 622
9,000 girls at my school

I give it out to 100

It's the numbers game
Sep 17 2010 12:40AM
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Shreddysaurus
Posts: 2120 - Karma: 59
On a scale from 1 to skank where do you place yourself?
Sep 17 2010 12:41AM
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Schlop
Posts: 3640 - Karma: 24
... you never cease to amaze
Sep 17 2010 12:41AM
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soulskier
Posts: 17806 - Karma: 3,841
interests, hobbies, favorite movies, life goals
Sep 17 2010 12:41AM
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ECB
Posts: 6991 - Karma: 622
I post up to 7 times a day now. And I think this is my last for today.
Sep 17 2010 12:43AM
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Jonny7
Posts: 3309 - Karma: 76
por favor
Sep 17 2010 12:45AM
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Kangbang
Posts: 14211 - Karma: 423
what is a woman's position in the household?

are you good at making sandwichs, if so what kind?

breast size?
Sep 17 2010 12:47AM
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jwalt
Posts: 611 - Karma: 11
ahahahaahahahah I'm laughing so hard right now
Sep 17 2010 12:49AM
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Downtofilm
Posts: 6896 - Karma: 20,395
hmmm interesting, Make sure they can do dishes properly. and make good sammiches
Sep 17 2010 1:08AM
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omIV
Posts: 1950 - Karma: 306
What are you on parole?
Sep 17 2010 1:11AM
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JacheOReally
Posts: 3597 - Karma: 253
I really want to know what happened in your life to make you so fucked up.
Sep 17 2010 1:12AM
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*LiNeLover*
Posts: 1224 - Karma: 256
what good will their parents income do?
haha
Sep 17 2010 2:10AM
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Arabian.
Posts: 9632 - Karma: 55
Check which position you are ok with
Vaginal - nope
Anal - Yup
Oral - Yup
Earlobe - I won't be gauging any time soon, so maybe.
Other: Two words - foot job.
Sep 17 2010 2:12AM
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rickroller
Posts: 2468 - Karma: 483
Good thinken you should just leav a pile of the apps in the kitchen .
Sep 17 2010 2:13AM
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Kangbang
Posts: 14211 - Karma: 423
we dont need to know
Sep 17 2010 2:13AM
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Arabian.
Posts: 9632 - Karma: 55
Purely in jest, sir. I thought maybe the gauging and foot job comments were enough to illustrate that.
Sep 17 2010 2:18AM
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TheDude
Posts: 2058 - Karma: 117

ask her how to get to chads gap

Sep 23 2010 5:52PM
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Broseph_Stalin
Posts: 3745 - Karma: 178
there should be a std checkbox
Sep 23 2010 5:57PM
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GrammarPolice
Posts: 48 - Karma: 10
I'm going to put you away for AN extended amount of time.
Sep 23 2010 6:05PM
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pigglywiggly
Posts: 4482 - Karma: 305
fuck, now a grammar police.
Sep 23 2010 6:06PM
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gus555
Posts: 4170 - Karma: 34
check box for if she likes anal urination
Sep 23 2010 6:09PM
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