10 things to do while ordering pizza:
1. Ask if you get to keep the pizza box. When they say yes, heve a sigh of relief Say hello, act stunned for five seconds, then behave as if they called you.
2. Tell them to double-check to make sure your pizza is, in fact, dead Ask if they have any idea what is at stake with this pizza If using a touch-tone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask person taking the order to stop doing that Ask what their phone number is. Hang up, call them, and ask again Order two toppings, then say, 'No, they'll start fighting'
3. After ordering, say 'I wonder what THIS button on the phone does.' Simulate a cutoff.
4. Say 'Kssssssssssssssht' rather loudly into the phone. Ask if they felt that.
5. When listing toppings you want on your pizza, include another pizza Mumble, 'There's a bomb under your seat.' When asked to repeat that, say 'I said 'sauce smothered with meat'.
6. Make the first topping you order mushrooms. Make the last thing you say 'No mushrooms, please.' Hang up before they have a chance to respond.
7. When the order is repeated, change it slightly. When it is repeated again, change it again. On the third time, say 'You just don't get it, do you?
8. Ask how many dolphins were killed to make that pizza.
9. Dance all around the word 'pizza.' Avoid saying it at all costs. If he/she says it, say 'Please don't mention that word.'
10. Have a movie with a good car chase scene playing loudly in the background. Yell 'OW!' when a bullet is fired.
'...guess i'm just a hypocrite for living out my dreams... it may now make a difference, but i'm trying to make you see, may not make no sense to you, but i know it does to me.'
'Jonny Moseley is the greatest thing to happen to skiing since snow' -MadTrix4Me
well fuck you.