okay, fuck this noise.
Buy a custom canvas wall tent with the walls cut down to 3 feet, so that the whole thing is about 5'5" at the peak. Burrow the fucker into the snow, and bring a sheepherder stove with you, so you can burn wood for heat and cooking. A cute little negative ten degree sleeping bag, a WWII army cot, and mess gear. Make the whole setup in a tucked away notch about a half hour skin from resort piste. Get your morning coffee, put on gear/skins, skin to the resort, ride down the hill to the lift, and your set to go. And then, ski home at the end of the day. Rinse, repeat. Go to lodge to find food and showers as needed. You seriously might not even have to leave the resort, EVER.