Member of the Month

KilaTsunami
October, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

Post Your Riddles

profile picture
Steeze_Cake
Posts: 613 - Karma: 16
I searchbarred it and the last one was back in 08'. So as the title says, post your riddles, and quote the ones you are trying to solve.

Ill Start

A boy was riding his moped down a one-way street the wrong way. A policeman stopped him and gave him a ticket. The police man paid the ticket himself.
May 25 2010 1:22PM
3 0
profile picture
Static
Posts: 8553 - Karma: 4,089
it was a raffle ticket the cop bought earlier
May 25 2010 1:25PM
0 0
profile picture
Static
Posts: 8553 - Karma: 4,089
any more brain busterz?!
May 25 2010 1:26PM
0 0
profile picture
=Carson=
Posts: 665 - Karma: 24
So there were two penguins paddling through the dessert one says wears your paddle, the other said Sure does
May 25 2010 1:28PM
0 0
profile picture
Steeze_Cake
Posts: 613 - Karma: 16
Wrong my good friend.
May 25 2010 1:29PM
0 0
profile picture
Rosshole
Posts: 87 - Karma: 17
the boy was the policeman's son
May 25 2010 1:42PM
0 0
profile picture
cultrara
Posts: 5147 - Karma: 46,850
you are in a room with two doors, one leads to heaven and the other leads to hell. There is a guard infront of each door. one guard lies and the other tells the truth. you dont know which guard is which. you have one question that you can only ask to one guard.   what would you ask to find which door leads to heaven?
May 25 2010 2:05PM
0 0
profile picture
Abc567def
Posts: 8756 - Karma: 801
the cop was the one going the wrong way?

what is the difference between a Kleenex and your mom?
May 25 2010 2:50PM
0 0
profile picture
theabortionator
Posts: 51644 - Karma: 162,265
I'm white, I fall from the sky in the winter, people ski and snowboard on me.




























It's cocaine, just kidding you were right it's snow
May 25 2010 2:52PM
0 0
profile picture
Rosshole
Posts: 87 - Karma: 17
Both Kleenex and your mom love catching my jizz, but the kleenex doesnt complain when I get some in its eye
May 25 2010 2:53PM
0 0
profile picture
ryano
Posts: 4465 - Karma: 1,535
the answer:

you go up to one of the guards and ask, "if i were to ask the other guard which door is the one to heaven, which one would he say?"

whatever the answer is, do the opposite.

the one that lies, would lie, and the one that tells the truth would have to say the lie cuz its the answer the other guard would say.
May 25 2010 2:54PM
0 0
profile picture
anxju
Posts: 9371 - Karma: 61
so 3 guys are stuck on the island. the first is a cop, the second is a firefighter, and the third is a doctor. they encounter a native who spares on of them. who is the one that is spared?
May 25 2010 2:57PM
0 0
profile picture
Abc567def
Posts: 8756 - Karma: 801
close but,

I didn't jizz on a Kleenex last night
May 25 2010 3:08PM
0 0
profile picture
Tasche
Posts: 5422 - Karma: 99
Does one of the guards always lie about everything? If he does you could just say "What is 1 + 1 =?" and if he says anything but 2 that is not the door.

For the record i liked the other kids answer above me.
May 25 2010 3:13PM
0 0
profile picture
NW_Rider
Posts: 2580 - Karma: 314
What was the President's name in 1960?
May 25 2010 3:14PM
0 0
profile picture
NW_Rider
Posts: 2580 - Karma: 314
I Fucked that up... In 1970?
May 25 2010 3:14PM
0 0
profile picture
ryano
Posts: 4465 - Karma: 1,535
you would know he's the liar, but you dont know which one is at which door.
May 25 2010 3:17PM
0 0
profile picture
Tasche
Posts: 5422 - Karma: 99
Hahah, I am a noob.
May 25 2010 3:18PM
0 0
profile picture
Rosshole
Posts: 87 - Karma: 17
barack obama
May 25 2010 3:24PM
0 0
profile picture
cultrara
Posts: 5147 - Karma: 46,850
yessir
May 25 2010 4:25PM
0 0
profile picture
Mitcheepoo
Posts: 61 - Karma: 28
A man walks into a bar and asks for a glass of water. The bartender pulls out a shotgun and threatens to shoot the man in the face. The man is satisfied and walks out happy. Why?
May 25 2010 4:37PM
0 0
profile picture
.Natty.
Posts: 1030 - Karma: 84
A man stops reading his book, turns off the light, and goes to bed. A few minutes later hundreds of people die? Why?
May 25 2010 7:33PM
0 0
profile picture
Hansel.
Posts: 4583 - Karma: 112
because hundreds of people die in the world every minute.
May 25 2010 7:36PM
0 0
profile picture
the604
Posts: 1067 - Karma: 10
it was hitlers bed time schedule
May 25 2010 7:38PM
0 0
profile picture
.Natty.
Posts: 1030 - Karma: 84
^ wrong hes in a lighthouse

A black dog is sleeping in the middle of a black road that has no streetlights and there is no moon. A car comes around the bend and swerves to avoid the dog. How did the driver know the dog was there?
May 25 2010 7:43PM
0 0
profile picture
cultrara
Posts: 5147 - Karma: 46,850
the car has headlights or its daytime
May 25 2010 7:48PM
0 0
profile picture
GratefulDead
Posts: 3554 - Karma: 84
Well... cars have lights haha.
May 25 2010 7:50PM
0 0
profile picture
.Natty.
Posts: 1030 - Karma: 84
fuck i left that part out, oh well i was supposed to say he didnt have his headlights on and the answer was daytime... oh well

It flattens things,
and without it,
it flattens you
It's in food
It's in buildings
It's in bridges too
What is it?
May 25 2010 8:00PM
0 0
profile picture
GratefulDead
Posts: 3554 - Karma: 84
pressure?
May 25 2010 8:05PM
0 0
profile picture
.Natty.
Posts: 1030 - Karma: 84
nah its iron

2 fathers and 2 sons go fishing. Each of them catches one fish. So why do they bring home only 3 fishes?
May 25 2010 8:09PM
0 0
profile picture
Tasche
Posts: 5422 - Karma: 99
There are 3 people

Grandfather (dad)
Dad (dad/son)
Son (son)

two sons, two dads.
May 26 2010 11:05AM
1 0
profile picture
F@ll_down
Posts: 167 - Karma: 10
A guy rides into town on monday, he stays there for two days (to get drunk and do all of that other cowboy gangster stuff) and leaves on monday. How?
May 26 2010 11:12AM
0 0
profile picture
Tasche
Posts: 5422 - Karma: 99
Monday is his horses name. BAM!



I'm not an airplane but I can fly through the sky. I am not a river but I am full of water. What am I?
May 26 2010 11:23AM
0 0
profile picture
NW_Rider
Posts: 2580 - Karma: 314
A cloud?
May 26 2010 2:56PM
0 0
profile picture
Noss.
Posts: 4059 - Karma: 149
Dead baby?
May 26 2010 3:13PM
0 0
profile picture
Tasche
Posts: 5422 - Karma: 99
Bingo


What is the speed limit of sex?
May 26 2010 3:28PM
0 0
profile picture
NW_Rider
Posts: 2580 - Karma: 314
Donkey punch.
May 26 2010 3:29PM
0 0
profile picture
Mr.Luke
Posts: 2441 - Karma: 166

1. What row of numbers comes next in this series?

1
11
21
1211
111221
312211
13112221

May 26 2010 3:37PM
0 0
profile picture
Mr.Luke
Posts: 2441 - Karma: 166
Which of the following statements are true?

1. At least one of these ten statements is false.
2. At least two of these ten statements are false.
3. At least three of these ten statements are false.
4. At least four of these ten statements are false.
5. At least five of these ten statements are false.
6. At least six of these ten statements are false.
7. At least seven of these ten statements are false.
8. At least eight of these ten statements are false.
9. At least nine of these ten statements are false.
10. At least ten of these ten statements are false.
May 26 2010 3:38PM
0 0
profile picture
NW_Rider
Posts: 2580 - Karma: 314
10, if "at least one is false" then that is the false statement and if "at least two is false" then the first two statements must be false. Continuing down the list all of them must be false.
May 26 2010 3:42PM
0 0
profile picture
Raptor.
Posts: 784 - Karma: 255
68 cause when you get to 69 you have to turn around
May 26 2010 4:42PM
0 0
profile picture
Steeze_Cake
Posts: 613 - Karma: 16

isn't that a knockoff from a yugi-oh episode? hmmm. Sorry for my childish knowledge.

Jul 10 2010 10:13AM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-5)