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Funniest criminal record

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freestyle016
Posts: 119 - Karma: 14

dudes right this started off after i was walking home from school right and it was a snowday so i was chucking snowballs, and a friend dare me to hit the next car that came round the corner and it turned out it was a police car so i hits bonnet and they pulled over and said oit you want a word (and they where two sexy police women) shes says do you think your big i said no, do you think your hard i said not at the moment but i think im funny and shes says i can give you a criminal record for throwing a snowball at her car but this is a warning,,,, come on you cant get a record for throwing a snowball at a police car ( in england dont know about the usa) well whats your views on this subject but it was so jokes i cracked up

Dec 18 2009 6:45PM
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Dr.NS
Posts: 640 - Karma: 19
looks like all the commas decided to chill together instead of going where they should have.
and all the periods were like fuck that and just dipped.
Dec 18 2009 6:49PM
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freestyle016
Posts: 119 - Karma: 14
yeh sorry about that really couldnt be bothered to do it all in the right places
Dec 18 2009 6:50PM
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Microcosm
Posts: 4765 - Karma: 153
ahahahaha
Dec 18 2009 6:51PM
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*christ*
Posts: 372 - Karma: 67
why was she asking you if you were big and hard? maybe law enforcement is different over here, but thats not really a standard question. also, OF COURSE YOU CAN GET A TICKET! what if the snowball obstructed their vision?
Dec 18 2009 6:53PM
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Blurst
Posts: 13577 - Karma: 10,169
I'ts funny because when i looked back all of the commas were together.
To OP Sexy police women sound pretty awesome. Maybe you should start hitting more cars with snowballs and you might get laid.
Dec 18 2009 6:53PM
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YukonGraham
Posts: 279 - Karma: 55
Man your lucky you didn't in the states the cops would fuck you in the ass and then give you a record
Dec 18 2009 6:57PM
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freestyle016
Posts: 119 - Karma: 14
because they think i was doing it  on purpose well true but not true i was going to hit any old car but it had to be a bloody police car but them girls where fit and i mean it im joining the force just to bang them haha :)
Dec 18 2009 6:58PM
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Delphi
Posts: 3748 - Karma: 36
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,;;,,...... you're welcome, use as you please.
Dec 18 2009 6:58PM
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I_Am_Mod
Posts: 13214 - Karma: 3,753
I study geology and we all have these cool geological hammers
one evening i was hanging out with some friends, i was really wasted and don't remember too much of the night, but long story short: for some reason i had put my friend's hammer into another friend's backpack.

later that night, the friend with the backpack, he was also really drunk, stole a bike with my other friend's hammer, the one i had put in his backpack for some reason. The guy get's busted by a police cruiser and is taken to their office.

Next morning i get a phonecall of the police chief, he wants to call me in for interrogation.
Things i was being charged with: (excuse my spelling and translation) theft, cooperating theft and blackmailing (dunno how to explain, but they tought i was trying to set my "backpack" friend up, so it seemed as if he had stolen the hammer)
After being interrogated for 3hours, they just kept asking me why i had put the hammer in the backpack, but i seriously didn't know why i had done so, i just answered to them: "I put it in my friends backpack because it was funny...."

long story short; i now have a criminal record that states:
"Theft of 1 geological hammer"
reason: "I tought it'd be funny"

:D


Dec 18 2009 6:59PM
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freestyle016
Posts: 119 - Karma: 14
glad it was hot women fuck them in the ass haha
Dec 18 2009 6:59PM
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*christ*
Posts: 372 - Karma: 67
best wishes on that endeavor! when you come to work on the first day make sure to remind them that you are snowball-boy and this time you are big and hard.
Dec 18 2009 7:00PM
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freestyle016
Posts: 119 - Karma: 14
hahahahahahahahaha
Dec 18 2009 7:03PM
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k-rob
Posts: 14217 - Karma: 2,891
dammit i am so jealous of him now with his sexy police women and shit.
Dec 18 2009 8:09PM
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infedel_one
Posts: 5140 - Karma: 444
only question i have is....did the sexy police women have bad teeth??
Dec 18 2009 8:12PM
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TechnoPotamus
Posts: 11626 - Karma: 3,522
Comma Use

1. Use commas to separate independent clauses when they are joined by any of these seven coordinating conjunctions: and, but, for, or, nor, so, yet.

The game was over, but the crowd refused to leave.

The student explained her question, yet the instructor still didn't seem to understand.

Yesterday was her brother's birthday, so she took him out to dinner.

2. Use commas after introductory a) clauses, b) phrases, or c) words that come before the main clause.

a. Common starter words for introductory clauses that should be followed by a comma include after, although, as, because, if, since, when, while.

While I was eating, the cat scratched at the door.

Because her alarm clock was broken, she was late for class.

If you are ill, you ought to see a doctor.

When the snow stops falling, we'll shovel the driveway.



How to Use PeriodsThe period is an end mark. An end mark suggests a stop. There are 3 end marks: an exclamation point, a question mark and the period. The period is usedwhen you are making a statement. However, that isn't the only time you can use a period. The other uses for periods are covered in the steps below.
  1. 1

    Place a period after a declarative sentence. A declarative sentence is one that makes a statement or a point.

  2. Step2

    Put a period at the end of an abridged sentence. An abridged sentence is one that is not a complete sentence, such as "After your homework."

  3. Step3

    Add a period after an imperative sentence. An imperative sentence is giving a command, such as "Write a check."

  4. Step4

    Use a period to express a decimal point. Periods can be used to express a decimal point in figures, percents or inches--for example $2.40.

  5. Step5

    Insert periods after abbreviations such as academic degrees, geographic names, courtesy titles, compass points, single word headings and Latin word and phases that are abbreviated.

  6. Step6

    Periods can be used to display lists, enumerate items, outlines, numerals and letters.

  7. Step7

    Understand the spacing required for a period. At the end of a sentence, you would space twice after the period--unless you are specifically told not to. There is one space when you use it in abbreviations. There are no spaces when a period is used in decimals.

Dec 18 2009 8:13PM
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ECfreeski3
Posts: 12019 - Karma: 126
hahaha cops sound a lot different in england..
Dec 18 2009 8:17PM
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.newman.
Posts: 1552 - Karma: 236
maybe thats what he was lookin for...
Dec 18 2009 10:11PM
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brandon_
Posts: 807 - Karma: 15
hahahahaahaha, ilold realhard.
Dec 18 2009 10:43PM
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Armanzoid
Posts: 2453 - Karma: 26
Hahaha, this thread is full of so much hilarity.


This story remind me of when I was a kid during the blizzard of '96 in NYC.

The city was basically shut down, it was ridiculous but so fucking epic. Barely cars on the roads, so we decided to have a massive snowball fight. We were building up are pyramid of snowballs, but I was kind of a dick as a kid and snuck a few rocks in the centers of the snowballs.

Well, the fight starts, and a car happens to pass by. My friend doesn't throw the snowball far enough, hits a car. No big deal, but that one had a rock in it. Window fucking breaks, brake lights come on, and EVERYONE booked. We saw a cop car around the corner turning its lights on and we thought he was coming for us, we were like 8 years old at the time and were terrified of going to kid jail so we ran like bandits. We never got caught, but I never ran so fast in my fucking life.
Dec 18 2009 10:53PM
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freestyle016
Posts: 119 - Karma: 14
no dude they where blonde chicks with pearl white teeth
Dec 19 2009 11:38AM
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PAuL_Hellar
Posts: 1355 - Karma: 62
hahahah +k for that
Dec 19 2009 11:50AM
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nickyp
Posts: 5673 - Karma: 215
I can only apologise on behalf of the entirety of the UK. We don't all write this incoherently.
Dec 19 2009 2:36PM
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jarossamdb7
Posts: 6322 - Karma: -10
you could easily get a record (it would probably be erased if you didn't get in any more trouble) in the united states for that. My buddy got a felony for spitting on a cop car steering wheel while he was in the back seat. Hope it gets lowered in court!
Dec 19 2009 2:45PM
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